(Untitled)

[sheankelor]

Title: Different Agendas - Part IV: Becoming a Queen
Author: Ree
Theme: Favorite Character - Beryl- Fuzzy
Genre: General
Version: Anime/ Manga - Fates/Tainted Gifts storyline- Silver Mellinium
Rating: G

Most of these characters belong to Takeuchi Naoko. I just borrowed my daughters paper dolls again.

Comments

[seniumboy]

Hmmm, nope. You'll have to revise this. Perhaps it's just my ideas of villains, but if you're going to write not only Metallia's form (which should not appear as anything close to human, but something more of a manifestation of the human appearance - I think) but her mindset as well, you'll have to go back and really edit. Don't make her monologue for one thing. Also, write this in one perspective, not in the third person.

Also on appearance, I would make Metallia appear more like a spirit entity. Not a god or anything, but maybe a demi god or something close, with no physical body since she never has one in the anime or manga (or even in PGSM). It gives you a chance to go for something darker too, which I notice you tend to avoid.

[sheankelor]

I was going for the elf/sihde thing,since she is of the same people as Selenity. They are eternally youthful, and appear perfect to most folk. What I think I need to do is give Beryl more time to shine, but Metallia wanted to hog the page.

Metallia loses her body after she is locked away by Selenity, but she does have the ability to polymorph... but I never got to that part of the tale to explain why she appeared as a cloud in the back ground in the anime.

I am absolutely no good at writing first person.

And of course I avoid dark.. I live with rose-colored glasses for a reason. ^-^

[seniumboy]

*groans a little* I would nap your rose-color glasses if I didn't know you have rose-colored contacts in your desk.

*sets a pair of ash-colored glasses on Ree's desk* The important thing to remember is that even if it's dark, it's your version of dark. You always have control over what happens and how.

And you know...if you can write good dark fics in your style, I'll write a month of fluff (my style of course)

[sheankelor]

*laughs* I wish I had contacts in my desk, but no... only spare sets of glasses. I developed an allergic reaction to my contacts about 2 yrs ago. They tried a different brand, but I still started reacting to them after about 2-3 months.

Oh...um-m-m Who is controlling the stories?... I write what I'm told to by the voices in my head. And for this tale it happened to be Metallia that was talking the loudest. *giggles happily*

And you can write fluff better than I can write dark. And I have to be inspired to write dark. So, I'm not taking you up on that. But J might like those glasses you left, he is such a realist sometimes. ^-^