We Will Not Regret The Past, Nor Wish To Shut The Door On It

[ratherastory]

Title: We Will Not Regret The Past, Nor Wish To Shut The Door On It
Summary: In spite of her better judgment, Lindsey goes to set the record straight with Sam after the events of "Free To Be You and Me."
Spoilers: Up to the end of 5.04 "The End."
Characters/Pairings: Sam/Lindsay, brief appearance by Dean (sort of)
Rating: NC-17, God help me
Word

Comments

[claudiapriscus]

Ooh, that was awesome. I loved how you fleshed her out. The show has a habit of creating one off characters (ok, often female one off characters) who seem to exist only to fulfill some plot necessity. They don't live, they don't breathe, and you don't get any sense of them as a person. You have done a wonderful job here in making her three dimensional and interesting and making the part she played seem more than just "because the plot required it".

[ratherastory]

I was pretty sad that Lindsey didn't get more attention than she did in that episode. Yet again, what could have been an awesome develop-Sam's-personality episode turned into a Sam-is-a-plot-device episode, and got intercut with Dean and Cas trapping an archangel.

Meh.

So I decided to give Sam and Lindsey the treatment I thought they deserved. :)

Glad you liked it!

[ratherastory]

*beams*

Thank you! I really liked Lindsey, and felt that she could have been so much more awesome than her three lines of dialogue let her be.

Playing darts for world peace? That's what hooked me. :)

I'm glad you liked it.

[shyriann]

Firstly, kudos on your porn. A perfect blend of hot enough to be steamy and not too graphic to be smutty.

I would have liked to see more of Lindsey, she was an immediately engaging character, and a few episodes of relationship, friendship, whatever with Sam could have made the blood addiction much more realistic. Thanks for giving me more of exactly that.

I absolutely adore your characterization of Sam through Lindsey's eyes. She sees how strong he is, and realises what he's capable of, and it makes the noticing of how polite and non-threatening he is even more powerful. And realising that she needed to be careful with him because he was being so careful with her, just choked me up. Poor bunny... He tries so hard to be a nice boy.

[ratherastory]

He does try so hard, poor bunny. I feel bad for Sam, most of the time. He tries so hard to be a good person, but most of the time he ends up a plot device. :(

Glad the porn worked for you. :D

[blubird_pie]

Hehe, add me to the list of people who weren't that impressed with show-Lindsay, but loved her here. It's awesome how she talks to Sam as a peer re:addiction, which is something I think he needs more of, and how tender she was with the soup and coaxing info about Dean out of him. On a different note, I love how you describe Sam packing up and leaving so quickly and absolutely, something that seems like a real hallmark of Winchesterhood to me.

Oh, and a last point- you shouldn't worry about writing sex poorly this was *eh hem* more than fine.

[ratherastory]

*bounces*

I was SO nervous about the sex, I can't even tell you. *waffles anxiously* So far people either haven't mentioned it or have been reassuring, so I'm counting it as a win.

I thought Show!Lindsey wasn't given a fair shake. Here was an obviously intelligent, independent, strong-minded girl who wasn't afraid to go after what she wanted, until the end when they turned her into a cowering wimp.

The packing up and leaving within minutes strikes me as a hallmark of Winchesterhood too, so I'm very pleased you liked that bit. :)

Sam has really not had a break this season, from anyone. Dean doesn't trust him, Castiel has only just come around to considering him one of the team, Lucifer wants him for his meat suit, and people practically won't give him the time of day.

So I figured it was about time someone saw his side of the story, and maybe tossed in some coddling for good measure. ;)

[blubird_pie]

Yeah, I think sex is like humor, it's almost impossible to gauge the effectiveness if you're the one writing it, because all the surprise and emotion of it is sort of corroded in the nuts-and-bolts process of writing it.

Re: Sam getting an ally- I agree! I don't think that it's intentional how team free will isn't helping him (or that the other characters are getting the support they need, either) but Dean just doesn't understand *wanting* things well enough to talk Sam through his addiction. The only thing Dean seems to desire is sacrifice- which is, of course, it's own bucket of worms. In any case, it was awesome to see someone with an understanding of Sam's POV, for once, and have Sam getting to air his self-doubt to a girl who'd been there too. And the soup! *gushes*

[tifaching]

Not only did you write SEX!, you wrote hot, oh my God Lindsey is a lucky girl sex! Great job and very hot without being graphic. So kudos! Loved recovering addict Lindsey helping out recovering addict Sam. And Lindsey was kick ass at the end and that was awesome too! And sick, feverish Sam for the win!

[ratherastory]

*bounces*

I'm very relieved that the sex worked. It's not exactly my usual type of work (which is probably why I let myself write h/c right after ;) ), and... to say I was anxious about it would be putting it mildly. :D

I'm glad you liked the story, too! I like Lindsey a lot.