She sounds like Edna St. Vincent Millay, also an inveterate sonneteer with an eye for men.
Would you say Tolmie is influenced by rap? I'm thinking in traditional sonnets, rhymes are often further than one line apart. Here you say Tolmie is prepared to rhyme the ends of lines as long as they're together, but then kicks things up a notch by piling them closer even than the ends of consecutive lines.
Great comments! I went through an Edna St Vincent Millay phase quite a while back, after reading a fascinating profile of her in an online magazine. One thing I discovered is that you could buy first editions of her books for dirt cheap, because so many copies had been printed in her hey day, such was her popularity. Anyway, while I remember that she was pretty open about her sexual desires, I don't remember that she treated men as the passive instruments of her pleasure in the same way Tolmie does.
As for rap, that's a fascinating question. She certainly piles the rhymes up in "Can't bear the searchlight's glare, the ripping stare/Admixture of what's wanted and what's there."
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Would you say Tolmie is influenced by rap? I'm thinking in traditional sonnets, rhymes are often further than one line apart. Here you say Tolmie is prepared to rhyme the ends of lines as long as they're together, but then kicks things up a notch by piling them closer even than the ends of consecutive lines.
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As for rap, that's a fascinating question. She certainly piles the rhymes up in "Can't bear the searchlight's glare, the ripping stare/Admixture of what's wanted and what's there."
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