The (Main) Capp Household
Over to the Capps! Where Consort is demonstrating exactly why I downloaded an everyday gardener mod.
Consort: You could’ve gone for a perfect plants one instead.
Too easy.
What’s wrong with the ones you already have?
Consort: Their ages are borked.
Alas, this is true, I think it’s a combo of InTeen and only playing the house for six days in the first round because I didn’t have the day of the week changing vase and I was trying to sync the household to the rest of the month. OH WELL.
I really need to try and fix this. On the bright side, it’s fairly easy to figure out what it’s asking me.
Juliet: Lol, townie.
Just some gaming.
Beau: Nice gnome.
Don’t you dare-
Beau: YOINK.
Oh my God.
Also I need to fix that flashing blue in neighbourhood view but I don’t even know where to start.
Hermia invited Puck over. I guess he didn’t figure out why, because he brought his sister.
Puck: Hey. My sister’s awesome.
At this point, I just accept that every single parrot I brought in round one is dead.
So behold, Scarlet the Second!
Romeo: Oh. It’s you.
Tybalt: Shut up dumbass, I’m trying to sneak out here!
It’s fine, Consort’s busy.
Consort: A shooting star!
Make a wish!
Consort: I wish to stop stargazing now in case a falling satellite kills me.
Consort: Also I need to talk to somebody or I’ll scream.
Hobby Leader: You can talk to me, handsome!
Consort: I would prefer to scream.
Juliet: Scarlet, my darling, my baby!
Scarlet: Squawk!
Juliet: Didn’t you use to know how to talk?
Hermia finally managed to get Puck alone and asked him out on a date to Don Calamari’s.
Hermia: A toast! To us!
And then the witch froze my whole game for several minutes, which spooked me because it never usually takes that long.
Mrs C: Too fucking cold out.
At least it means everybody will be fully dressed.
Mrs C: And if they’re not, I’ve got something to wrap very tightly around their necks.
Hermia: I just don’t see why we can’t have planes. We’ve got helicopters and brooms, after all.
Hi Antony.
Antony: *does horribly*
No.
No.
Juliet: Hey, granddad.
Antony: *dies some more*
Juliet: That’s nice, granddad.
Somebody brought Gabriella Newson home from school and she hung out for a few hours.
Gabriella: Oh no, he’s hot.
Homework party!
Townie: Nice telescoping!
Antony: *angry ghost dying noises*
Tybalt and Hermia and due to head off to college any day now - yes, I KNOW the ages are messed up - and I don’t know if Consort will still be alive when they come home, so I decided to treat them all to a vacation.
Antony: Oh, I see how it is, you all get to go on holiday while I stay here and repeat my death over and over.
Yes, that is how this game works.
And here we are in lovely, sunny Twikki Island!
Hermia: Come on, Juliet, let’s hula!
Tourist: So you were in a movie?
Tybalt: I said there’s been a lot of portrayals of me in movies, but sure, let’s go with that.
I honestly cannot decide who’s the least dressed person here, other than it’s not Hermia.
Excuse me, I got you suites so you could have your own beds, stop that.
Caption this contest.
And then Juliet got sunstroke and passed out.
Juliet: Worth it.
Tybalt: ‘Scuse me, coming through.
Consort to the rescue.
In fact, he’s the only one not suffering from sunburn, even when he spends all day doing this.
Consort: Hot as an OMGWTFBBQ out here.
I let them have lobster thermidor for breakfast, as a treat.
Hermia: Heyyy sis, how’s the sunburn? How about this bit? Or this?
Juliet: Oh my God fuck OFF.
Consort: And now we make an offering to the great spirit, Jumbok.
Tybalt: We would, but you’re in the way.
Juliet: -And that’s why I wished for peace.
Tourist: That sounds boring as hell, I’m gonna wish for rivers of fire.
Sorry, kid, someone else got there first.
Tybalt: Yeah, I’m buying new jewellery, so what?
I had no idea this was a thing!
Juliet: HURRY UP AND COME PLAY PIRATES.
And lo, pirates were played.
Juliet also wanted to perform for tips.
Juliet: Yeah, don’t tell any Monty’s but we’re actually pretty poor right now and this vacation wiped out all our money.
...I should really try and fix this, but ugh, that means placing a beach lot during testing and I really cannot be bothered right now.
Juliet: BOO!
Hermia: EEK!
Juliet: Haaaahaha, shit yourself!
Hermia: Bitch.
Local: Hey, that was pretty cool, hang loose!
Tybalt: Do not hang loose, Juliet, that’s an order.
Juliet: I’m gonna do it.
Hermia: MY EARS ARE BLEEDING.
Consort: HORK.
Consort: +500
Hermia: Hello, yes, I would like this fine doohickey.
No.
Juliet: But-
NO.
Study party.
Consort’s been rolling a lot of gardening wants lately, so I built him a pretty greenhouse.
And then Hermia and Tybalt left for college.
So now it’s just Consort and Juliet in the house. Juliet won’t go to college until the next round, then I’m contemplating moving someone in to house-sit (Goneril perhaps?) in case Consort dies, but until then, he’s gonna chug down this entire cooler of elixir.
Consort: -Which is why we must both be careful when cooking.
Juliet: Granddad, I’m a chef.
And then the phones went down. And for some reason, the cell phones aren’t working properly either (another thing I need to fix, but I wanna check and see if they work on another lot first because the manor is kinda glitchy), so Consort got to stab the power box with a screwdriver.
Consort: Didn’t die!
I’m hoping he’ll manage to build a servo to house sit, but right now, he’s still on robots.
It’s the weekend and Juliet needs some company her own age. Time for a date!
Juliet: Gotta go to work love you bye!
Consort: Next, security bot.
Romeo: Did you know half your flowerbeds are dead?
Yeah, turns out the gardener couldn’t step over the little fence I used to line the path.
I haven’t pictured it before, but Juliet’s very best friend is Lilith Pleasant. Every single day she rolls a want to call her and chat. Nobody else, just Lilith.
Juliet: -And you would not believe what my mother did last night.
Consort doesn’t have work at the weekend. On the down side, that means we’re missing out on his juicy paycheck. On the bright side, that means he gets to spend all day churning out cleanbots.
Let’s try that date again.
Romeo: You’re paying, right?
And apparently that’s the only picture I took, go me!
I forgot to put Hermia and Tybalt’s stuff in their inventories before I sent them to college, so Juliet invited them over to collect. Tybalt had class and couldn’t make it, but Hermia was happy to come over.
Hermia: Look at you, you’re so tiny now!
Juliet: I’m actually the perfect height to rip your throat out with my teeth.
And the round ends with a healthy sibling chat about nuclear warfare, as you do.
Uberhood Index