I win at quick introductory chapters.
Need I remind you that chapter one = obviously going to go a bit slow. I am sorry - but it's the law, the law of England, nothing to do with me. (To quote Basil Fawlty).
Nevertheless, please, I thrive on any reply you can give me. Make me want to keep writing goddammit.
Disclaimer: All characters belong to J.K. Rowling. Zilch belong to Louise.
CHAPTER I: A Savage Silence
It had been raining for weeks, relentless and unashamed of how miserable it seemed to make the world. Looking out the window you saw cars practically swimming down the street, and a feeling of instant schadenfreude filled your mind as you watched all the people scattering around desperately clinging onto their umbrellas and cursing as they stepped off the curb into a lagoon of dirty rain water.
The Snape family’s small and decrepit townhouse nevertheless stood steadfast in such times. Though Tobias Snape was usually one of those millions of Muggle Englishmen coming through the door cursing about the insignificant matter of ‘how bloody wet it bloody was’. Today was no different; as his son Severus sat cross-legged on his bed flipping through a rather large textbook coated with charts and timelines regarding past developments in the Dark Arts, he had the severe ill-fate of glancing out of his window which overlooked the street to see his father angrily shaking his right leg, as if any effort on his part would completely rid himself of his now saturated trouser leg. Severus held his stare for a few more seconds before faintly rolling his eyes and returning to his book.
Severus loathed his father. Loathed him with every fibre of his being. He could not remember a particular time where this hatred had been even slightly lifted. The hate had probably manifested itself to stronger levels because, as vile and drunk and violent as the man was, Severus could not bring himself to extract any sort of magical revenge on him. This was by no means his own choice (given the choice Severus would have cursed the man to a thousand pieces by now), but rather the choice he had to make if both he and his mother were to have any sort of amity. For reasons which Severus would never understand for the rest of his days, his mother would never hear a single bad word against her husband - though he brutally mistreated her almost every day. Severus winced slightly as he heard the door downstairs slam shut and the sound of keys rustling and clinking about.
“Hullo!” came the insufferable voice from downstairs.
Severus jumped up silently from his bed, clasped the doorknob and softly shut his bedroom door. He hoped by the somewhat loud and agreeable greeting that his father was a tad less than incensed today. He knew that his mother had just about had enough of her quota for tolerance for this week; yesterday he had found her weeping on the kitchen floor only to look up at him and pathetically choke, “oh Severus, I love you so much, you know that don’t you… you do, don’t you?” - the location often changed, but the weeping and the declarations never did.
“Anyone hoooome? Eileen?”
Most times she would break down in the bathroom. It was the only room in the house with a lock attached. Severus hissed as he thought of his mother’s stupidity, she was a witch for Merlin’s sake - he was a wizard. She knew Severus could break the lock with ease as he had done on many occasions. But he had only done so when the wailing behind the door stopped - for knowing his mother was manically depressed, the worst images came to his mind whenever he was subjected to silence rather than her crying.
Muffled chatter from downstairs; Severus heard his mothers voice and instinctually switched on to red alert though he kept absentmindedly flicking through his textbook.
It was both a pleasure and a vexation to be going back to Hogwarts for his Seventh year next month. Severus was utterly torn not only between leaving his mother to her own devices against his father and the chance to get away from it, but he was also torn between home and getting the bejesus beaten out of him at school. Any way he thought about it, it was a grim prospect - but that was also what he said about coming back home, therefore he tried not to dwell on either prospect. But this was his last year at Hogwarts, and Tobias would soon get what was coming to him, Severus had no doubts about this, if he was to leave his mothers home he’d make damn sure that monster left with him.
Severus let his book drop onto the floor as he stretched out on his bed (three times too small for his growing body) and stared resolutely at the fractured and grimy ceiling, wondering about what was happening downstairs. He felt his eyelids grow heavy and soon drifted off from his unpleasant meditations.
~
Knock, knock, knock.
Severus turned over in a groggy state, ignoring the knock as he drew his now dead hand from underneath his head.
Knock, knock.
“Oh piss off, you bastard” Severus mumbled into pillow before he heard Eileen’s almost inaudible voice.
“Severus? Can I-”
“Yes, mother” he replied loudly, sitting up. The door creaked open and the sallow-skinned, sticklike woman entered.
“Oh, I’m sorry to wake you darling, I didn’t know-”
“It’s fine, it’s fine” Severus quickly reassured her. He wished the woman would grow a backbone sometimes. He also wished she would cease using those shallow ‘dear’ and ‘darling’ words; he knew when she used them, she did not mean it. The years had slowly corrupted her personality - not that he should blame her for that. “Where is he?” he said, hoping to sound unconcerned. Eileen opened her mouth, but paused for a few seconds.
“Out.”
“Ah. Meaning the pub.”
“… Possibly, yes.”
Severus shook his head in amazement. She never used to be this way. She used to stick up for herself, she used to be a strong woman. Now she was nothing but a weak depressive push-over, and just the sight of her made him sick to his stomach. Eileen made her way over to him and sat on the end of his bed, he moved his feet to allow her.
“You know, Severus, I wast thinking that… you should let your father drive you to Diagon alley next week.”
Severus frowned.
“Why on earth would you even say such a thing? He has said nothing about the Wizarding world since… well, he hasn’t at all has he?”
“That’s what I mean, dear-”
“You can stop using those so-called affectionate words, mother. At most they are half-intended when you make them sound so obligatory.” He almost regretted using such harsh tones with her, the bags under her eyes seemed to darken. Of course that was just his imagination…
“And you can call me ‘mum’, Severus, for Merlin’s sake, am I such a formality to you?”
Severus sighed. “No, mum” - he did it for her much more than himself. “Anyway, about father?”
“I want him to be more involved-”
“MORE INVOLVED?” Severus yelled in such a loud and shocked manner that Eileen winced at his actions. “Mum!” he formed his hands into claws and held them out in front of her, “are you clinically insane? That’s the LAST thing we want to do! I just- I-” Oh fan-bloody-tastic. She is crying again.
Eileen was sobbing into her hands, her back shaking from all the violent weeping.
“I don’t- I don’t know Sev…erus” she croaked between sobs. Severus rubbed his mouth with his hand, contemplating on what to do. “He.. he told me he’d think about and I- I- oh, I don’t know. I love you, you know that? I love you so…”
“Yes, mum” Severus said quietly. He was awfully lacking in the sympathy department but was trying his best. “I know. You tell me this all the time when you’re upset, you don’t have to, I told you I know.” Of course he was lying.
Eileen vigorously wiped her wet face and forced a painful looking smile. “Look at me, sitting here crying” she strained a laugh as well, which Severus thought was rather un-characteristically spirited of her, “I should let you get along with... well… anything but comforting your insane mother, right.” Severus gave her a weak smile. It was the least he could do.
“If father wants to take me to Diagon Alley, let him. I don’t really care” but he couldn’t help but scowl. Thankfully Eileen didn’t notice. She kissed his forehead and he cringed. Every affectionate moment she showed him was so excruciatingly false and cold that he considered it a form of torture.
“Thank you, darl- Severus.” She corrected herself as she hopped off the bed and shot him a tired looking smile before exiting. Severus watched her descend down their spiral staircase with much anxiety. He felt a lot of things right now, but feeling like her son, like a person she was meant to take care of and not the other way around, was not one of them. He gritted his teeth and clenched his hands around his grey bed sheets. He could not believe he had just agreed to take his disgusting excuse for a father around Diagon Alley to go shopping for Hogwarts robes and broomsticks and potions and everything Tobias despised. He knew he would be in for a beating when they both returned; how on earth could his mother be so profoundly oblivious to this?
If there were two things he wanted to keep as far away from each other as possible - it was Tobias Snape and the Wizarding world: a world in which he was not welcome.
Severus snarled and flushed red with anger. His already broken mirror split right down the middle and fell off the wall.
Nevertheless, please, I thrive on any reply you can give me. Make me want to keep writing goddammit.
Disclaimer: All characters belong to J.K. Rowling. Zilch belong to Louise.
CHAPTER I: A Savage Silence
It had been raining for weeks, relentless and unashamed of how miserable it seemed to make the world. Looking out the window you saw cars practically swimming down the street, and a feeling of instant schadenfreude filled your mind as you watched all the people scattering around desperately clinging onto their umbrellas and cursing as they stepped off the curb into a lagoon of dirty rain water.
The Snape family’s small and decrepit townhouse nevertheless stood steadfast in such times. Though Tobias Snape was usually one of those millions of Muggle Englishmen coming through the door cursing about the insignificant matter of ‘how bloody wet it bloody was’. Today was no different; as his son Severus sat cross-legged on his bed flipping through a rather large textbook coated with charts and timelines regarding past developments in the Dark Arts, he had the severe ill-fate of glancing out of his window which overlooked the street to see his father angrily shaking his right leg, as if any effort on his part would completely rid himself of his now saturated trouser leg. Severus held his stare for a few more seconds before faintly rolling his eyes and returning to his book.
Severus loathed his father. Loathed him with every fibre of his being. He could not remember a particular time where this hatred had been even slightly lifted. The hate had probably manifested itself to stronger levels because, as vile and drunk and violent as the man was, Severus could not bring himself to extract any sort of magical revenge on him. This was by no means his own choice (given the choice Severus would have cursed the man to a thousand pieces by now), but rather the choice he had to make if both he and his mother were to have any sort of amity. For reasons which Severus would never understand for the rest of his days, his mother would never hear a single bad word against her husband - though he brutally mistreated her almost every day. Severus winced slightly as he heard the door downstairs slam shut and the sound of keys rustling and clinking about.
“Hullo!” came the insufferable voice from downstairs.
Severus jumped up silently from his bed, clasped the doorknob and softly shut his bedroom door. He hoped by the somewhat loud and agreeable greeting that his father was a tad less than incensed today. He knew that his mother had just about had enough of her quota for tolerance for this week; yesterday he had found her weeping on the kitchen floor only to look up at him and pathetically choke, “oh Severus, I love you so much, you know that don’t you… you do, don’t you?” - the location often changed, but the weeping and the declarations never did.
“Anyone hoooome? Eileen?”
Most times she would break down in the bathroom. It was the only room in the house with a lock attached. Severus hissed as he thought of his mother’s stupidity, she was a witch for Merlin’s sake - he was a wizard. She knew Severus could break the lock with ease as he had done on many occasions. But he had only done so when the wailing behind the door stopped - for knowing his mother was manically depressed, the worst images came to his mind whenever he was subjected to silence rather than her crying.
Muffled chatter from downstairs; Severus heard his mothers voice and instinctually switched on to red alert though he kept absentmindedly flicking through his textbook.
It was both a pleasure and a vexation to be going back to Hogwarts for his Seventh year next month. Severus was utterly torn not only between leaving his mother to her own devices against his father and the chance to get away from it, but he was also torn between home and getting the bejesus beaten out of him at school. Any way he thought about it, it was a grim prospect - but that was also what he said about coming back home, therefore he tried not to dwell on either prospect. But this was his last year at Hogwarts, and Tobias would soon get what was coming to him, Severus had no doubts about this, if he was to leave his mothers home he’d make damn sure that monster left with him.
Severus let his book drop onto the floor as he stretched out on his bed (three times too small for his growing body) and stared resolutely at the fractured and grimy ceiling, wondering about what was happening downstairs. He felt his eyelids grow heavy and soon drifted off from his unpleasant meditations.
~
Knock, knock, knock.
Severus turned over in a groggy state, ignoring the knock as he drew his now dead hand from underneath his head.
Knock, knock.
“Oh piss off, you bastard” Severus mumbled into pillow before he heard Eileen’s almost inaudible voice.
“Severus? Can I-”
“Yes, mother” he replied loudly, sitting up. The door creaked open and the sallow-skinned, sticklike woman entered.
“Oh, I’m sorry to wake you darling, I didn’t know-”
“It’s fine, it’s fine” Severus quickly reassured her. He wished the woman would grow a backbone sometimes. He also wished she would cease using those shallow ‘dear’ and ‘darling’ words; he knew when she used them, she did not mean it. The years had slowly corrupted her personality - not that he should blame her for that. “Where is he?” he said, hoping to sound unconcerned. Eileen opened her mouth, but paused for a few seconds.
“Out.”
“Ah. Meaning the pub.”
“… Possibly, yes.”
Severus shook his head in amazement. She never used to be this way. She used to stick up for herself, she used to be a strong woman. Now she was nothing but a weak depressive push-over, and just the sight of her made him sick to his stomach. Eileen made her way over to him and sat on the end of his bed, he moved his feet to allow her.
“You know, Severus, I wast thinking that… you should let your father drive you to Diagon alley next week.”
Severus frowned.
“Why on earth would you even say such a thing? He has said nothing about the Wizarding world since… well, he hasn’t at all has he?”
“That’s what I mean, dear-”
“You can stop using those so-called affectionate words, mother. At most they are half-intended when you make them sound so obligatory.” He almost regretted using such harsh tones with her, the bags under her eyes seemed to darken. Of course that was just his imagination…
“And you can call me ‘mum’, Severus, for Merlin’s sake, am I such a formality to you?”
Severus sighed. “No, mum” - he did it for her much more than himself. “Anyway, about father?”
“I want him to be more involved-”
“MORE INVOLVED?” Severus yelled in such a loud and shocked manner that Eileen winced at his actions. “Mum!” he formed his hands into claws and held them out in front of her, “are you clinically insane? That’s the LAST thing we want to do! I just- I-” Oh fan-bloody-tastic. She is crying again.
Eileen was sobbing into her hands, her back shaking from all the violent weeping.
“I don’t- I don’t know Sev…erus” she croaked between sobs. Severus rubbed his mouth with his hand, contemplating on what to do. “He.. he told me he’d think about and I- I- oh, I don’t know. I love you, you know that? I love you so…”
“Yes, mum” Severus said quietly. He was awfully lacking in the sympathy department but was trying his best. “I know. You tell me this all the time when you’re upset, you don’t have to, I told you I know.” Of course he was lying.
Eileen vigorously wiped her wet face and forced a painful looking smile. “Look at me, sitting here crying” she strained a laugh as well, which Severus thought was rather un-characteristically spirited of her, “I should let you get along with... well… anything but comforting your insane mother, right.” Severus gave her a weak smile. It was the least he could do.
“If father wants to take me to Diagon Alley, let him. I don’t really care” but he couldn’t help but scowl. Thankfully Eileen didn’t notice. She kissed his forehead and he cringed. Every affectionate moment she showed him was so excruciatingly false and cold that he considered it a form of torture.
“Thank you, darl- Severus.” She corrected herself as she hopped off the bed and shot him a tired looking smile before exiting. Severus watched her descend down their spiral staircase with much anxiety. He felt a lot of things right now, but feeling like her son, like a person she was meant to take care of and not the other way around, was not one of them. He gritted his teeth and clenched his hands around his grey bed sheets. He could not believe he had just agreed to take his disgusting excuse for a father around Diagon Alley to go shopping for Hogwarts robes and broomsticks and potions and everything Tobias despised. He knew he would be in for a beating when they both returned; how on earth could his mother be so profoundly oblivious to this?
If there were two things he wanted to keep as far away from each other as possible - it was Tobias Snape and the Wizarding world: a world in which he was not welcome.
Severus snarled and flushed red with anger. His already broken mirror split right down the middle and fell off the wall.