Fic: all you need is faith; Gen: Sam, Dean
all you need is faith
one-shot
Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural or any of its characters or plots. I mean no infringement, this is for personal benefit only.
Fandom: Supernatural
Pairing: Gen: Sam, Dean
Word count: 1,284
Rating: G
Summary: Sam’s a little skeptic at first. It’s kind of weird. It’s really weird.
Warnings: Spoilers up to season 4
Prompt: 03. Remember
Author’s Notes:
- The idea behind Free Hugs does not belong to me. If you’re curious about it, see this video.
- For my spn_25 table prompt 03: never
*****
Sam’s a little skeptic at first. It’s kind of weird.
It’s really weird.
But Jessica had signed them up and Sam really can’t say no to her, besides he’s done weirder things. Maybe.
It’s lunch time on Friday when he finds himself standing between buildings on the Stanford campus. He has a cardboard sign in his hand, a nervous--but real--smile on his face. Jessica’s a few feet away with an even bigger smile and none of the hesitation.
A tiny girl who comes up to Sam’s chest, if he’s being generous, stands nervously in front of him and bites her lip. Sam laughs a little and pulls her in. The smile she returns when they pull apart is worth everything.
-0-
So this is what Sam does now. Every Friday at lunch he spends his time offering people free hugs. Sometimes Jess is there, sometimes she isn’t, but Sam always is.
The thing he learns--sees--is that so many people want a hug but so few actually come up to him for one. Sometimes he can tell someone is this close to giving him one. Those people get extra big smiles and Sam holds on tightly.
After a few months, people know him. He has some regular huggers, which is a little weird, but never weird enough to give him that shit’s about to hit the fan feeling. It’s nice. Sam likes it. He likes feeling as though he’s helping people without having to salt and burn something, or hold a rifle. Sam can make someone happy just as he is.
It’s amazing.
-0-
Months after Jess is gone and Stanford is a quickly fading memory, Sam misses all the hugs he used to get. Every week he’d get around a hundred, just from strangers alone. Now he gets none.
He never thought he’d miss it so much, never thought he’d miss seeing that smile on someone’s face when they realize that a complete stranger could care enough to want to hug them. But he does.
He can’t remember the last time he gave Dean a hug, but he had to have been young. Eleven, maybe. Twelve.
These days he has to stop himself from reaching out. He has to stop himself from hugging all of the crying people they meet, the ones whose lives have just changed--probably for the worse.
Everything feels heavy after Jess’s death. His arms feel heavy, but he still wants to pick them up, still wants to offer a hug to someone in need. And maybe, just maybe, he wants a hug back.
They’re in Texas when Sam finds an old piece of cardboard under his bed in the motel. They’re within walking distance to the local mall, and he barely thinks about it before scribbling Free Hugs on it and leaving.
He plants himself between a shoe store and a jewelry store. He takes a deep breath and holds up his sign.
People stare--they always stare--but there’s that longing in their eyes. They want a hug. They want a free hug. They want to just be able to feel that human connection for just a second.
Sam smiles and gives his best puppy dog look, until finally an elderly lady walking by, stops and looks up at him. He lowers his sign and wraps his arms around her, waiting for that moment when she returns the hug. It’s quick, but when they pull back, it’s everything. She pats him on the cheek and walks away with a smile on her face.
After that more people come and Sam hugs each and every one of them.
By the end of the day he feels relief, he feels happy. He feels free.
Sam hides the sign under the passenger seat in the Impala and waits until the next town to pull it out again.
-0-
So it’s become something like this. Sam and Dean arrive in a town, they split up for research, interviewing, whatever, and Sam takes a few hours of his free time to find a local hangout and offer free hugs. He’s pretty sure Dean thinks he’s getting laid if his coy remarks about how much Sam is glowing afterwards are anything to go by. Sam doesn’t care.
He does wish, though, that Dean would accept a hug. Sam hasn’t offered, though, so maybe that’s on him. Maybe Dean would.
He waits.
-0-
Three years after Jess dies, Dean dies.
Sam loses himself for a while, gets too involved with Ruby and revenge and everything he should be staying away from. He’s at the mall trying to get some new work boots when he spots her. It’s a girl, probably close to Sam’s age. She’s holding a cardboard sign with a smile.
Sam heads straight for her.
She grins and wraps him up in a tight hug.
Sam never realized what it was like to be on the other side. To be the one receiving the comfort. It’s amazing. He remembers Jess and her laugh and her smile and the way she smelt like strawberries. He remembers that old lady in Texas. He rememberes Mary, a shy girl who he’d given hugs to regularly at Stanford.
“Thank you,” Sam whispers as he pulls away.
The girl looks at him and simply says, “You’re welcome, man.”
Sam leaves town that night, not bothering to give Ruby a forwarding address. He detoxes and starts driving.
-0-
Dean comes back on a Thursday.
Sam doesn’t bother to ask before he gives Dean a hug. It’s long and he’s gripping Dean tightly--not the kind of hug you give for free. Dean holds on just as hard and Sam thinks of all the wasted years he spent giving hugs to strangers over his own brother.
-0-
After their back on the road again, Sam sticks to Dean like glue. If Dean cares he doesn’t say anything, but Sam spent months without him and years before that and he’s just a little afraid of Dean leaving again. Even if Sam’s the one who left before.
But it’s been a couple of months since Sam’s pulled out his piece of cardboard and it’s making him a little anxious. He misses giving out free hugs. He misses helping people smile and not just not die.
“Dude,” Dean says eventually. “If you need to get laid--get laid. I’m not going anywhere, okay?”
Sam runs a hand through his hair. “It’s not that.”
Dean eyes him. “Okay…”
“Come with me,” Sam blurts out.
Dean raises an eyebrow but follows Sam out of the motel room. Sam drives them to the closest mall and digs out his sign. Dean eyes it and frowns, but keeps up with him as they weave through the mall towards the center of it.
Sam leaves Dean on a bench and moves a few yards away. He raises his sign up and it’s only a few minutes before a couple of teenage girls approach him carefully. Sam grins and offers them both hugs. Then comes an elderly couple and Sam doesn’t let either of them off without a tight hug.
The people don’t stop coming and Sam doesn’t stop grinning.
He can feel Dean’s eyes on him the whole time, but he doesn’t think about what that means.
When stores start locking up, Sam lowers his sign and looks up to find Dean standing right in front of him. His hands are shoved in his pocket and Sam knows that look. The one of the faces of people who want a hug but can’t ask. The reason Sam offers instead.
He reaches out and gives Dean a hug so tight that neither of them can breathe.
“Thank you,” Dean whispers.
“You’re welcome.”
-0-