"Mou, ii..." [Bleach, IshidaxIchigo]
title: "Mou, ii..."
author: yumeyana
pairing: Ishida x Ichigo
rating: pg
genre: sap...?
summary: "It is all supposed to make me angry," Ishida thinks as Ichigo tries hard to protect him. Yet somehow the Quincy doesn't feel anything near it.
crossposted @ bleach_yaoi, ishi_ichi and @ my fic journal, quilled_dreams, where it sleeps.
Author’s Notes: I had just finished watching Bleach 71 on video streaming when this came to mind while I was preparing to take a bath. I just had to grab my mom’s laptop and type it after getting out of the shower. This is also my first try in writing anything Bleach-related so don’t expect much. And I’m still pretty new to the fandom so… Anyway, I hope you like it. I tried to get the emotion across and I hope I was successful.
Disclaimers: Bleach and all its wonderful characters belong to the wonderful Kubo-sensei. Only the intake on Ishida’s thoughts is mine. ^^~
Dedication: To simply_kim who pushed me into the love that is Bleach. Thank you for making me re-watch the first episode that has been with me since forever.
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“Mou, ii…”
He tells me not to push myself. He tells me to never leave his side. He tells me things that hurt my pride both as a man and as a Quincy. He knows it but still he stands between me and the enemy. He protects me as if he hasn’t realized what he is doing with his words and his actions.
It is all supposed to make me angry.
I am a Quincy and to be protected by a Shinigami is something close to a nightmare and a disgrace put together. More so, I am a man before anything else. And even though I have lost my powers as a Quincy, I know I am still capable of protecting myself. I do not need a Shinigami.
And yet my heart doesn’t explode with rage towards his actions; my anger is more at myself. I am not supposed to be as helpless as the enemy sees that I am. I am supposed to stand beside him - my bow ready to aim and fire. I am not supposed to be behind him, relying on him.
But I am. And I find myself neither angered nor ashamed that he is trying his best to save the woman, kill the enemy and protect me. He is supposedly hurting all that I ever am, yet I do not feel anything near that.
Instead, there is a smile fighting its way to my lips.
*
I can hear his footsteps from a mile away and I know that they are his before I even see him. He bursts into the room and cries out my name. I can see a lot of people behind him yet they are nothing but a blur - a mist of faces. The only thing I can see now - despite the fact that I am wearing my glasses - is him and his eyes boring into mine. That concern overflowing in his eyes as he looks at me is something that takes my breath away.
Ichigo - neither a Shinigami nor Kurosaki - is here, concerned. And it is enough for all my previous guidelines for anger and pride to fall and fade into nothingness. The smile I try to fight down wins and my lips curve. My heart loses all its questions and calms down.
Yes. It is enough.
xxx
11:10p
23March06
author: yumeyana
pairing: Ishida x Ichigo
rating: pg
genre: sap...?
summary: "It is all supposed to make me angry," Ishida thinks as Ichigo tries hard to protect him. Yet somehow the Quincy doesn't feel anything near it.
crossposted @ bleach_yaoi, ishi_ichi and @ my fic journal, quilled_dreams, where it sleeps.
Author’s Notes: I had just finished watching Bleach 71 on video streaming when this came to mind while I was preparing to take a bath. I just had to grab my mom’s laptop and type it after getting out of the shower. This is also my first try in writing anything Bleach-related so don’t expect much. And I’m still pretty new to the fandom so… Anyway, I hope you like it. I tried to get the emotion across and I hope I was successful.
Disclaimers: Bleach and all its wonderful characters belong to the wonderful Kubo-sensei. Only the intake on Ishida’s thoughts is mine. ^^~
Dedication: To simply_kim who pushed me into the love that is Bleach. Thank you for making me re-watch the first episode that has been with me since forever.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Mou, ii…”
He tells me not to push myself. He tells me to never leave his side. He tells me things that hurt my pride both as a man and as a Quincy. He knows it but still he stands between me and the enemy. He protects me as if he hasn’t realized what he is doing with his words and his actions.
It is all supposed to make me angry.
I am a Quincy and to be protected by a Shinigami is something close to a nightmare and a disgrace put together. More so, I am a man before anything else. And even though I have lost my powers as a Quincy, I know I am still capable of protecting myself. I do not need a Shinigami.
And yet my heart doesn’t explode with rage towards his actions; my anger is more at myself. I am not supposed to be as helpless as the enemy sees that I am. I am supposed to stand beside him - my bow ready to aim and fire. I am not supposed to be behind him, relying on him.
But I am. And I find myself neither angered nor ashamed that he is trying his best to save the woman, kill the enemy and protect me. He is supposedly hurting all that I ever am, yet I do not feel anything near that.
Instead, there is a smile fighting its way to my lips.
*
I can hear his footsteps from a mile away and I know that they are his before I even see him. He bursts into the room and cries out my name. I can see a lot of people behind him yet they are nothing but a blur - a mist of faces. The only thing I can see now - despite the fact that I am wearing my glasses - is him and his eyes boring into mine. That concern overflowing in his eyes as he looks at me is something that takes my breath away.
Ichigo - neither a Shinigami nor Kurosaki - is here, concerned. And it is enough for all my previous guidelines for anger and pride to fall and fade into nothingness. The smile I try to fight down wins and my lips curve. My heart loses all its questions and calms down.
Yes. It is enough.
xxx
11:10p
23March06