FF: For The Best
Title: For The Best
Author: Quaggy
Category: AU
Rating: PG
Notes: This is an AU that diverges from the canon in Season 4 right before Commencement, though I will occasionally make a reference to minor plotlines. Things that did NOT happen: Zoey’s kidnapping, Amy Redux, Carrick, Gaza, Leo’s heart attack. Oh, and, after Sam lost his election, he came back as Senior Legal Council… because I wanted him to. I've literally been working on this fic off and on for over a year and I never could have finished if not for the help and encouragement of Caz, Gatz and Edgy. Thank you so much, you guys!
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May 2003
Nobody expected it. It came upon them with no warning or explanation.
No one could make out exactly what was said. But it was clear from what did travel through the door that Josh and Donna were both angry. Possibly the angriest they had ever been. They were screaming at each other. Screaming. And then they weren’t and that was almost more ominous.
When Donna finally left Josh’s office, it was obvious that she had been crying and wasn’t doing a very good job of keeping her emotions under control. She didn’t say a word and refused to make eye contact with anyone. She must have been half way through emptying out her desk drawers before anyone realized that she wasn’t looking for something. She was packing her things.
Josh suddenly appeared at his door and, totally expressionlessly, watched Donna work. After a few moments he disappeared back into his office. He emerged moments later with an empty file box, which Donna accepted without a word or glance his way.
“I need your letter of resignation on my desk before you leave,” he said with a voice as cold as ice. Donna simply nodded and returned to her packing. And before anyone could really get a handle on what was happening, she was gone, leaving an empty desk in her wake.
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January 2004 ~ Charlie
Everyone expected Josh to break. How could he function without Donna? Most figured that he would constantly be late, distracted, disorganized and going through replacement temps like water.
None of that happened. Josh was on time - as much as the White House could allow - on the ball, and though he was considerably more intense, he also was more ruthless. Those that forgot that Josh was a deadly political operative, no matter who was on his staff, soon remembered… painfully.
Josh was as methodical and merciless into correcting his staffing problems as he was in corralling reluctant senators. He started by dividing Donna’s job responsibilities in two. He first hired a temp to keep his schedule and answer the phones and do the filing, which was more or less a success. Though he went through them like tissue paper, it had more to do with the nature of the job and temp work in general than Josh’s personality or demands. He actually spent very little time with any of them. It was the new policy assistant, Donna’s true heir, that caused the most speculation. There were jokes about young, blond assistants and bets were made about how long it would take Josh to bed these invented girls. All of which ended abruptly when Josh actually found someone to fill the position. He hired Charlie.
It had taken Josh almost a month to work up the courage to ask Leo and then the President for their sanction, before presenting the offer to Charlie. Leo thought it was an excellent solution to Josh’s predicament and a wonderful opportunity for the younger man. The President was equally enthusiastic, provided that Josh ensured that Charlie completed his education. For his part, Charlie, who would have been reluctant to leave under normal conditions, was relieved to find a job that would keep him in close proximity to the President, but allow him to mostly avoid Zoey and her French idiot boyfriend. He had tried to win her back only to be shot down again and again. It was time to move on… at least physically.
It worked well for both boss and assistant. Charlie began to see just how different Donna was from the other assistants… even Debbie or Mrs. Landingham. And just like Donna, he blossomed with the freedom and instruction that Josh gave him. Josh was always ready to explain the slightest question he had. It was interesting listening to the theory behind Congressional maneuvering, rather than a history lesson about FDR’s favorite activities. But Charlie still stopped by the Oval whenever he could so he wouldn’t miss out on the President’s stories. As Josh’s assistant, he felt like he truly understood how the White House worked within modern American politics.
Josh, too, seemed to like the partnership. Charlie doubted that anyone could take Donna’s place and, with him, Josh didn’t have to pretend that he missed Donna for purely professional reasons. Donna called Charlie shortly after his first official day to offer her congratulations and her current contact information. She told him that he was welcome to contact her whenever he had a question and Charlie took her up on that on a fairly regular basis. Though she would never inquire, she always seemed so grateful when Charlie volunteered how Josh was doing. Josh, in turn, never asked about Donna, but he would listen attentively whenever Charlie would “casually” mentioned what Donna had said. Charlie learned quickly that the best way to get Josh to eat healthy was simply mention that he had talked to Donna as he left a salad by Josh’s elbow. Josh wouldn’t say a word, but when Charlie would return, the container would be empty.
Before anyone knew it, over six months had passed and it was time for the State of the Union once again. It was a bittersweet time for Charlie, further complicated by the fact that his new girlfriend was not what she seemed, and worse, didn’t understand why he was so upset. After they returned to the West Wing, Charlie’s plan was to sit quietly and brood. A plan complicated by Josh’s desire to go out and talk about sports.
“Josh, I’m not really in the mood,” he objected after Josh’s third attempt.
“All the more reason to go down to the Hawk and Dove to discuss the Mets and the possibility of DC baseball.”
“Only baseball?”
“Absolutely. Unless you want to talk about something else.”
Suddenly, Charlie realized that his boss knew something about ensorcellment and the distraction it offered from phantom relationships and, from the look on his face, Charlie could tell that Josh would be willing to answer just about any question Charlie had. He really only had one.
“Does it ever get any easier?” Charlie didn’t feel the need to specify which failed relationship he was talking about and, from the softening around Josh’s eyes, his boss didn’t need him to.
“Sometimes. And sometimes, it doesn’t. Things are the way they need to be and you just have to find some way to deal with it,” Josh explained softly.
“Yeah,” Charlie replied, lost in thought. “You know what? I think I will get that beer, but not at the Hawk and Dove. If we’re going to talk sports, we’re going to a sports bar.”
“Excellent. Lead on.”
Josh was right. Sometimes you just have to do what you need to do to get through your day.
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April 2005 ~ CJ
CJ never knew that Charlie was in contact with Donna until he told her to give Donna a call during her Boston trip. No one else seemed to know what happened to her after she left the White House two years ago. Charlie could be very secretive when he wanted to be.
Donna was excited to hear from her and agreed to meet for dinner at a restaurant nearby the hotel where CJ staying. CJ sat in awed silence as Donna chattered away enthusiastically about her program. Donna being Donna and used to long White House hours was overloading and tearing through her requirements. She hoped to graduate this semester… with her Master’s no less!
“The internship requirement might be a bit of a problem, though,” Donna mused.
“Don’t they know that you used to work at the White House?”
“Yes, that’s no secret. When the White House Chief of Staff writes a letter of recommendation, people tend to take notice of you. But I can’t use that for credit, unfortunately.”
“Leo wrote a recommendation for you?” CJ asked, touched that her outwardly gruff boss would do something so sweet.
“Yes,” Donna grinned. “The President wanted to too, but I didn’t think it was appropriate,” she paused and furrowed her brow. “I think the President just called, instead.”
“So, who wrote your second letter of recommendation?” CJ asked. Donna looked blankly at her friend for a moment.
“Josh,” she said, slightly incredulous.
“Oh… I thought… I mean...”
“Do you really think so little of him?”
“No! It’s just… I didn’t think you were talking to each other.”
“We’re not. It’s better this way.”
“Don’t you miss him?” CJ found herself asking.
“Of course, I do,” she replied earnestly. “But things worked out the way they were supposed to. I can’t change that. I won’t.”
“He’s miserable,” CJ suddenly said. Ignoring Donna brief look of pain, she pressed on. “If you didn’t know him, you wouldn’t know anything is wrong. He doesn’t say anything. But he looks the way my father did after my mother died.”
“Josh is strong. He doesn’t need anyone.”
“I don’t think your right about that. Josh is very good at hiding it, but you can see that he’s lonely. He doesn’t go out anymore, unless one of us makes him. I think he spends most of his time at the office. I think he’d even sleep at there if he thought Leo and the President would let him.”
“CJ,” Donna forced out in a strangled voice. “Please!”
“I’m sorry,” CJ stammered. “I didn’t mean…”
“It’s ok. It’s just… difficult.”
“So that’s it? You both just move on?”
“After what we said, CJ, I had to. We both did,” Donna sighed. “I might not like it, but this is really the only way that things can be. Trust me, it’s for the best.”
Faced with causing more heartbreak if she continued, CJ decided that trusting her friends to do what they felt was best was probably the most loyal thing she could do.
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August 2005 ~ Toby
For the past two years, Toby did his best to avoid any conversation involving Josh’s personal life or his relationship with his former assistant. So, it was ironic that he was the one who had to bring up the subject. But some news had crossed his desk. News that could potentially disarm Josh. Toby thought it was the best he heard it from him. Fortunately, he would have had the perfect opportunity to bring up the unpleasant topic during a meeting on the equally unpleasant task of getting reluctant congressmen to run again.
“Will you talk to Santos?” Toby asked.
“Yeah, but I don’t think he’s going to listen.”
“He has a new Chief of Staff. That would indicate a willingness to run again.”
“Well, since his old one just gave birth and decided to stay home with the kid, I don’t think he had much choice in the matter.”
“Do you know who his new Chief of Staff is?”
“Yeah,” Josh replied, still glancing through his folders, unconcerned. “Donnatella Moss.”
It was amazing how dispassionately Josh said her name. It was as if she were a stranger. You would never guess that three years ago, he would say it so possessively… so inappropriately.
“And this does not bother you?” Toby asked with upraised eyebrows.
“Why should it?” Josh finally glanced up, slightly amused.
“You are going to have to speak with her.”
“I did yesterday. I think she’s hoping he’ll run… but for something a bit higher.”
“There are no senatorial seats open and Texas won’t elect a new governor for another four years.”
Josh just smiled enigmatically.
“I’ve learned to never underestimate Donna. But I’ll talk to him.”
And that, Toby thought, was all that needed to be said on either topic.
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November 2005 ~ Sam
Their meeting with the President in the Oval Office had come to an abrupt end when a clearly shaken Charlie interrupted with the news that Donna Moss was in a car accident and taken to the hospital. Josh flew out the door, barely pausing for the President’s nod. Leo sent Sam trailing behind to make sure he was alright. Though, Sam wasn’t exactly sure what Leo expected him to do beyond that. Just keeping an eye on him was difficult enough. Who would have expected Josh to jump out of the car while it was still moving and be through the hospital’s front door before Sam had even unfastened his seat belt!
“I’m here to see Donnatella Moss. I was told she was in a car accident and taken here,” Josh announced with authority to the nurse at the front desk, a good first impression that was somewhat lessened by the way he skidded to a stop in front of her and was nearly knocked over when Sam ran into him.
“Are you a relative?”
“I’m Josh Lyman, her fiancé.” Sam was both impressed with how Josh did not hesitate with his lie and how he did not flinch when he delivered it. Somewhere along the way Josh had finally found himself a poker face.
“She has a sprained wrist and a few minor lacerations. Would you lik… Are you alright?” the nurse asked with alarm as Josh bent at the waist and tried to catch his breath.
“Fine. Can I see her?”
“Of course. What about your friend?” Josh turned around, surprised, as if he had forgotten Sam was even there.
“Yeah, he’s with me.”
Sam let Josh take the lead. He was just as worried about Donna as Josh was… well, maybe not as much Josh. But just as worried as everyone else in the West Wing. But a small, small part of him was anticipating Josh and Donna’s reunion with something akin to glee. It was bound to be high drama and he would be an eyewitness to it all.
“Ahhh… You must be Josh,” the doctor smiled, when Josh burst through the door of the exam room. “She has been working herself into a state over your driving skills.”
“Josh,” Donna breathed, as he took her outstretched hand. “I should have never said I wouldn’t stop for red lights. It’s not romantic. It’s stupid and dangerous and the last thing we need is another car accident.”
“Yeah well, there was no need to worry,” Josh replied. “Apparently nobody else trusted my driving either. Charlie got me a car and Leo sent Sam along just to keep me in line.”
“Charlie’s a smart guy. Hi, Sam,” Donna called.
“How are you, Donna?” Sam asked, slightly bewildered by the anticlimactic scene unfolding in front of him.
“Fine, but I’m going to have this huge bandage on my forehead. I should probably cut my hair into bangs,” Donna sighed.
“No, don’t do that!” Josh yelped, horrified.
“I’m going to have to if it scars,” she replied.
“Well, its your hair,” he said doubtfully. “But I think you’re making too big of a deal over something as silly as a scar.”
“No fair, throwing my words back at me.”
“Why not when it works so well for you?” he smirked and then grew serious. “Does everybody know you’re okay? Have you talked to your boss yet?”
“Yes. Have you talked to my boss yet?”
“You don’t give up, do you? I came up with a nine point plan! What more does he want from me?!”
“To add a tenth point.”
“You enjoy being cryptic, don’t you?”
“It’s what gets me out of bed in the morning.”
“I thought you said you had just gotten engaged. You two sound like you’re already married,” the doctor laughed. “Have you set a date yet?”
“No, actually,” Donna replied, rather sheepishly. “We figured we had better tell everyone that we’re together first.”
“You’ve been keeping it secret?” the doctor asked, surprised.
“No, it just all happened very, very fast.”
“Donna, ‘fast’ is like… the total and complete opposite of our relationship.”
“You proposed to me on our first date!”
“Which happened two years after I first kissed you. After six years of wanting to!”
“And who’s fault was that?” Donna objected, wincing a little as the doctor started to finish up.
“Oh yes, forgive me for kicking your ass when you got cold feet and convinced yourself that staying as my assistant was all you needed out of life!”
“I was actually referring to the kissing thing!”
“Okay, you’ve both lost me!” the doctor exclaimed, as he affixed Donna’s said huge bandage. Sam, forgotten by the door, nodded his agreement.
“Long distance relationships are tough enough on established couples and, as it stood, we were finding the whole ‘admitting you like each other’ thing difficult to navigate,” Josh attempted to explain after exchanging glances with Donna. “So we kept waiting to get together until we were in the same city again and once we were… there just didn’t seem to be a reason to wait any longer.”
“But we didn’t know how to tell people,” Donna sighed as she hopped off the exam table. “Though, I suppose that’s not an issue now.”
“You think?” Josh smirked and leaned in to kiss Donna hello. “Truthfully, I would have liked a less dramatic way of declaring my love than racing from the Oval Office to your bedside. It’s a little obvious. Lacks finesse.”
“I don’t know, Josh. Sam’s looking a little dumbfizzled over there. I think he just put two and two together.”
Josh turned around to face his friend. Sure, enough Sam was staring at them, slack jawed. It all suddenly made sense. Josh and Donna were far more aware of their feelings than anyone had given them credit for. The supposed fight. The long periods of silence. It didn’t mean estrangement. They were just dealing with separation the best way they knew how.
“You alright there, Sam?” Josh queried.
“Yeah. Remind me to stop making assumptions when it comes to you two.”
“Where’s the fun in that?” Josh smirked as Donna laughed.
Sam sighed. Lord only knows what those two had in store for the future.