[Taemin/Victoria] Sorry, PG-13, Oneshot
Pairing: Victoria Song Qian x Lee Taemin
Rating: PG-13
Genre: General, minor!Angst, Romance
Disclaimer: Nothing is mine but the writing.
Summary: He had promised her so much, yet, because of his age, there is very little that he can truly give. This is a single glance of what they have together-- perhaps the one and only.
She stares at their intertwined hands, always walking just a step behind him.
Hey, you said that we’d have a future.
There are many unasked questions-many untold answers. In the silence, they find a virtue that they wouldn’t be able to grasp in each other’s voice. Neither can be certain of how strong the other believes in what they have-what they have already lost.
Her eyes drift from their interlocked hands to the small of his back.
We’ve come this far; at this point in time, it seems as though happiness really is in our reach.
Throughout their journey, he had always been the one leading the way. It’s not because she’s lacking in a sense of direction, but because he’s so intent on bringing her to a place where he thinks is best for the both of them.
“Hey, isn’t this oddly beautiful?” He asks.
Simple, muffled thoughts are interrupted and she looks up into his eyes. They are gentle, smiling into her own as he tugs gently on her hand to bring her closer. “Hm?”
“Haven’t you been listening to me?” He chuckles, lowering his eyes to the laces of his tennis shoes as he kicks the ground beneath him.
Like this, he looks almost lost-a sense of insecurity wrapping around his already small frame. “No,” she answers honestly. “I’ve been thinking.”
“About what?” The boy asks her nervously. Their eyes meet again and she feels her breath hitch in the back of her throat, every word she wants to confess tangling into a tight knot. “Are you regretting?”
She wants to say no, but the words don’t come.
After a long time, he sighs and wraps his arms around her shoulders, pulling her into his chest. She can feel his heart beating against her own and it’s an odd feeling, her stomach twisting and tightening as she curls her fingers into his knitted sweater.
“Hey, Taemin-ah, I’m sorry.” It’s all she can say; the only thought that possesses her day and night.
But he shakes his head, words muffled against the skin of her neck. “Vic, this world is a bad place,” he whispers, “we are too helpless against it, so our love can only be like this-a beautiful mistake, but it’s not an apology. I’ll never be sorry.”
Victoria feels Taemin harden his hold on her, breathing heavily and leaving marks of red on her pale skin. She feels his lips pressing against her collar, eliciting a gasp from her, but she does not push him away.
“This is what we are.” Taemin says, pulling away and gazing directly into her large, round eyes. He runs the pad of his thumb over the newly implanted spot, smiling victoriously. “We are passionately burning a bright red, but it’s only a passing sensation to the world.”
He says, “They don’t believe in what we have, simply because I’m only so old and you’re only so young.”
The words prick into her ears, leaving them ringing in protest.
“But they don’t know I’ve been prepared for this-prepared to prove that the distance between us is a fading factor; that in the end, what’s important is that we’re here now, together.”
Victoria cups his cheek in her palm, leaning forward to press a chaste kiss to his tender lips. “I’ll set you free, the moment you ask to be liberated from me, but for now-if only for now-I’ll hold on tightly to you. “
“Don’t let go of me, Vic,” Taemin mutters, and his breath is heated against hers. He slips his hand over hers, pressing it harder against his red streaked cheek; his grasp is firm, safe. “Don’t ever let go, even if I ask for it.”
Because it will hurt, even if I forget to scream out in pain. A life without you will be unbearable, even if I’m so tired that I want to give up, asking you to release me from the suffering. Maybe I’ll tell you now that it will be okay, but in the future my stance may weaken. If I am the weaker one, then you must stay strong.
He presses their foreheads together, breathing the same air, wanting the same affection.
He says, “Vic, I haven’t gone crazy.”
“I know, Taemin,” she tells him.
But he runs his fingers through her silky hair, weaving them around the back of her neck and pulling back, craning and printing small kisses down the smooth bridge of her throat. In their world, they are always alone.
Her fingers dig into his back.
I’m not crazy, but my heart aches like mad when you touch me. It aches for you, for me, for all that we cannot have. I’ve forgotten to tell you how afraid I am of losing you to the world, but I’m more afraid of losing myself to my sanity.
Taemin hears Victoria choking and stops himself, pulling back and worriedly searching for the source of her pain. Her eyes are clamped shut, tears pooling down her cheeks.
He brings a finger to his lips and feels the moisture-her tears had stained him there, too.
“How did it come to this?” He asks her. How did we start and how will we end?
Victoria shakes her head, trying to turn away from him. Taemin pulls her back and dabs away at her tears with soft fingers.
But she should know, he thinks, because she was the one who had given him everything-love, care, affection, those were all fragments of what built this path to their instability.
He hushes her and pulls her close, running his hands up and down her back soothingly.
Though her tears had stopped quickly, her heart never stops aching. Despite being prone to weakness, she knows how to be honest. “I’ll free us both, when it comes time for me to let go. When I do, Taemin, don’t try to hold on anymore.”
“Don’t try to be brave, when you’re so scared and uncertain.” Victoria tells him.
She knows, Taemin thinks. She’s always known. “I’m not scared,” He replies, “not right now, at least.”
They stand there, comforting each other under the heavy silence. A long time passes, and Taemin collects his thoughts into a string of words that don’t quite make sense to anyone but himself.
“If I let you go, will you ever turn around and come back for me? You’ve never promised me anything, and I’m too afraid to put anything to test, but no matter what anyone says, as long I’m still alive, I’ll want only you. They all say that I’ve gone crazy, for you, and that you must be crazy because of me too; they say that I can’t be cured, but you know it right? That no matter when or where, you’ll always have me-all of me.”
Victoria nods against his shoulder.
Our love has been frowned upon since the beginning, but to me it’s simply a pity to not love you. From the start, no one agreed with this decision, but this love is ours so what right do they have to decide for us? No matter how sad or tragic our love becomes, at least we’ve given it our all.
I’ll give you everything, so, can you do the same for me-for us?
She nods hard, the tips of her fingers numbing against the rough cloth of his shirt. Only Taemin knows what they are both agreeing to; a silent commitment, a future built on glass.
They are giving in to what they fear most.
Oblivion.
-
A/N: Wrote this a long time ago, after I read an amazing Chinese Victoria/Taemin fanfic and became obsessed with this couple. I doubt anyone's gonna read this, lol, 'cause this pairing is pretty much non-existent in the rest of the world but, hey, I like them! ^__^
Semi-inspired by Zhang Yun Jing's Hey, I'm Sorry
Rating: PG-13
Genre: General, minor!Angst, Romance
Disclaimer: Nothing is mine but the writing.
Summary: He had promised her so much, yet, because of his age, there is very little that he can truly give. This is a single glance of what they have together-- perhaps the one and only.
She stares at their intertwined hands, always walking just a step behind him.
Hey, you said that we’d have a future.
There are many unasked questions-many untold answers. In the silence, they find a virtue that they wouldn’t be able to grasp in each other’s voice. Neither can be certain of how strong the other believes in what they have-what they have already lost.
Her eyes drift from their interlocked hands to the small of his back.
We’ve come this far; at this point in time, it seems as though happiness really is in our reach.
Throughout their journey, he had always been the one leading the way. It’s not because she’s lacking in a sense of direction, but because he’s so intent on bringing her to a place where he thinks is best for the both of them.
“Hey, isn’t this oddly beautiful?” He asks.
Simple, muffled thoughts are interrupted and she looks up into his eyes. They are gentle, smiling into her own as he tugs gently on her hand to bring her closer. “Hm?”
“Haven’t you been listening to me?” He chuckles, lowering his eyes to the laces of his tennis shoes as he kicks the ground beneath him.
Like this, he looks almost lost-a sense of insecurity wrapping around his already small frame. “No,” she answers honestly. “I’ve been thinking.”
“About what?” The boy asks her nervously. Their eyes meet again and she feels her breath hitch in the back of her throat, every word she wants to confess tangling into a tight knot. “Are you regretting?”
She wants to say no, but the words don’t come.
After a long time, he sighs and wraps his arms around her shoulders, pulling her into his chest. She can feel his heart beating against her own and it’s an odd feeling, her stomach twisting and tightening as she curls her fingers into his knitted sweater.
“Hey, Taemin-ah, I’m sorry.” It’s all she can say; the only thought that possesses her day and night.
But he shakes his head, words muffled against the skin of her neck. “Vic, this world is a bad place,” he whispers, “we are too helpless against it, so our love can only be like this-a beautiful mistake, but it’s not an apology. I’ll never be sorry.”
Victoria feels Taemin harden his hold on her, breathing heavily and leaving marks of red on her pale skin. She feels his lips pressing against her collar, eliciting a gasp from her, but she does not push him away.
“This is what we are.” Taemin says, pulling away and gazing directly into her large, round eyes. He runs the pad of his thumb over the newly implanted spot, smiling victoriously. “We are passionately burning a bright red, but it’s only a passing sensation to the world.”
He says, “They don’t believe in what we have, simply because I’m only so old and you’re only so young.”
The words prick into her ears, leaving them ringing in protest.
“But they don’t know I’ve been prepared for this-prepared to prove that the distance between us is a fading factor; that in the end, what’s important is that we’re here now, together.”
Victoria cups his cheek in her palm, leaning forward to press a chaste kiss to his tender lips. “I’ll set you free, the moment you ask to be liberated from me, but for now-if only for now-I’ll hold on tightly to you. “
“Don’t let go of me, Vic,” Taemin mutters, and his breath is heated against hers. He slips his hand over hers, pressing it harder against his red streaked cheek; his grasp is firm, safe. “Don’t ever let go, even if I ask for it.”
Because it will hurt, even if I forget to scream out in pain. A life without you will be unbearable, even if I’m so tired that I want to give up, asking you to release me from the suffering. Maybe I’ll tell you now that it will be okay, but in the future my stance may weaken. If I am the weaker one, then you must stay strong.
He presses their foreheads together, breathing the same air, wanting the same affection.
He says, “Vic, I haven’t gone crazy.”
“I know, Taemin,” she tells him.
But he runs his fingers through her silky hair, weaving them around the back of her neck and pulling back, craning and printing small kisses down the smooth bridge of her throat. In their world, they are always alone.
Her fingers dig into his back.
I’m not crazy, but my heart aches like mad when you touch me. It aches for you, for me, for all that we cannot have. I’ve forgotten to tell you how afraid I am of losing you to the world, but I’m more afraid of losing myself to my sanity.
Taemin hears Victoria choking and stops himself, pulling back and worriedly searching for the source of her pain. Her eyes are clamped shut, tears pooling down her cheeks.
He brings a finger to his lips and feels the moisture-her tears had stained him there, too.
“How did it come to this?” He asks her. How did we start and how will we end?
Victoria shakes her head, trying to turn away from him. Taemin pulls her back and dabs away at her tears with soft fingers.
But she should know, he thinks, because she was the one who had given him everything-love, care, affection, those were all fragments of what built this path to their instability.
He hushes her and pulls her close, running his hands up and down her back soothingly.
Though her tears had stopped quickly, her heart never stops aching. Despite being prone to weakness, she knows how to be honest. “I’ll free us both, when it comes time for me to let go. When I do, Taemin, don’t try to hold on anymore.”
“Don’t try to be brave, when you’re so scared and uncertain.” Victoria tells him.
She knows, Taemin thinks. She’s always known. “I’m not scared,” He replies, “not right now, at least.”
They stand there, comforting each other under the heavy silence. A long time passes, and Taemin collects his thoughts into a string of words that don’t quite make sense to anyone but himself.
“If I let you go, will you ever turn around and come back for me? You’ve never promised me anything, and I’m too afraid to put anything to test, but no matter what anyone says, as long I’m still alive, I’ll want only you. They all say that I’ve gone crazy, for you, and that you must be crazy because of me too; they say that I can’t be cured, but you know it right? That no matter when or where, you’ll always have me-all of me.”
Victoria nods against his shoulder.
Our love has been frowned upon since the beginning, but to me it’s simply a pity to not love you. From the start, no one agreed with this decision, but this love is ours so what right do they have to decide for us? No matter how sad or tragic our love becomes, at least we’ve given it our all.
I’ll give you everything, so, can you do the same for me-for us?
She nods hard, the tips of her fingers numbing against the rough cloth of his shirt. Only Taemin knows what they are both agreeing to; a silent commitment, a future built on glass.
They are giving in to what they fear most.
Oblivion.
-
A/N: Wrote this a long time ago, after I read an amazing Chinese Victoria/Taemin fanfic and became obsessed with this couple. I doubt anyone's gonna read this, lol, 'cause this pairing is pretty much non-existent in the rest of the world but, hey, I like them! ^__^
Semi-inspired by Zhang Yun Jing's Hey, I'm Sorry