Serpentine 6/65

Sep 03, 2018 13:33

First Chapter, Previous Chapter
Serpentine: Chapter Six
IN WHICH THERE IS A CAT AND A BIRD BUT THEY ARE NOT WHO YOU THINK THEY ARE

Chapter Six introduces the readers to Anita & Co.'s new callsigns. They are as follows:

Anita Blake = Kitten
Nathaniel Grayson = Robin
Jean-Claude Master of Ceremonies = Renard
Micah Callaham = Wolverine

Kitten hates her name but apparently not enough to change it. Kitten, Robin, Nicky (who doesn't get a fancy epithet because bodyguards don't get to have fun per Robin) Millerlite, and Pudding arrive at the Circus after fighting through traffic. Business is booming and it is only after staring out the window and noticing a poster advertising Melanie the Lamia that Kitten's brain jumpstarts and she remembers there is a case she's supposed to be helping Wolverine with.

Huh. Now I really want a buddy cop show staring Kitty Pride and Logan in a world where mutants are an accepted facet of reality and part of the local culture. He's the grizzled loose cannon, she's an up and coming rookie. Together, they fight crime!

Robin freaks out a bit because Kitten gets excited about Melanie, and Nicky tells him to calm the fuck down Kitten is fine. Happy, even. They then discuss the ramification of lowering their psychic shields but all I got out of it was that Kitten values her ability to lie to her lovers and feels that would be hampered by having a closer bond. Polyamory, people, is built on lies and sex. At least the version Kitten practices.

Kitten takes almost half a page describing how to get out of a car. Millerlite and Pudding temporarily become human meat shields in case one of her many enemies decide to take a pot-shot at her, and Kitten complains less about how Robin only has one bodyguard to body-block him and more about how having three people makes an uneven distribution of labor. Or something. Personally I'd be more concerned about, “...I was pretty confident at our safety in the parking lot because I knew there was a hidden observation post near the roofline of the Circus, complete with a trained sniper, most of the time.” (p.49)

What. The. Fuck. This is a place of business, a place where parents take their kids, and it has a sniper station. There is so, so much wrong with this. Speaking of things that are wrong, I really feel sorry for Kitten during these passages. She's letting herself be herded by a bunch of dudes, and holding hands is something that needs serious consideration on her and her Robin's part. Because she needs her hand free in case she is attacked.

That is sad.

And telling.

Subconcious!Kitten is screaming behind a gag of 'therapy' to not trust the monsters but... alas. There be the infamous stairs to hell that gives everyone cardio, supposedly. I don't think cardio is the right word for it since everyone is still capable of holding a conversation. There is more discussion about words, this time in regards to the mercenary AKA Contract Worker life. Millerlite points out how putting soldier of fortune on tax returns would be stupid and the phrase fuck fuck games is used. This is a phrase I had never heard before and assumed it was a typo that got missed in edits, but Urban Dictionary defines fuck fuck game as the military equivalent of to fuck with someone. So intentionally irritate and annoy, often with mind games. Since Millerlite is an ex-SEAL this actually makes sense in context. Kudos, Hamilton?

Inside the Circus proper Robin complains about the increase in guards and checkpoints, and from what I could count there are at minimum ten guards paired up at various doors/hallways they had to go through to get to Renard's bedchamber. Depending on how long the halls are this may be overkill, but Robin's complaint isn't even about that. It is about how he can't sex up all the guards because, funnily enough, they can't do their jobs if they have to cater to their employer's boy toy's sexual whims.

Kitten actually gets mad at Nathaniel for his whining about not being informed of the increase in security. The simile she chooses to describe her upset is, however, problematic. “I felt that spurt of anger inside me that was always there like a pilot light just waiting for the right spark, but I breathed though it. I counted and breathed and remembered that I was in love with Nathaniel and he was right.” (p.54)

First off, because this is AB:VH my brain has been trained to associate certain themes and phrases and my mental image of Kitten's anger was a cock spurting into the empty darkness that is her soul. Second, a pilot light doesn't need a spark. The purpose of the pilot light is to BE the spark. Third of all, if you have to remember that you love someone maybe you don't actually love them? Fourthly, fuck Robin. I don't care if he says it is winter and there is snow on the ground he is ALWAYS wrong.

The chapter ends with Kitten literally climbing Nicky like a tree and getting weak knees at his awesome kissing skills.

Well, at least she waited till the other guards left?

Yay, therapy!


serpentine, anita blake, msp, flog

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