Serpentine 2/65
Chapter One
SERPENTINE: CHAPTER TWO
IN WHICH DONNA IS TRAPPED IN THE MIRROR!VERSE
Anita, the most experienced and hardcore vampire hunter in the world, somehow misses the approach of a housewife and drops a boob in her surprise. This is a stupid unnecessary gag, but very Anita. Donna laughs and looks away and Anita goes into raptures on how pretty and youthful she looks because being happy makes you pretty. Personally, I find this hilarious, because one of the few consistencies Anita has had over the series is her own self-esteem and appreciation of her own body. She almost always needs someone to tell her how pretty she is even if she isn’t blonde and thin.
I can only assume this is Anita subconsciously admitting she isn’t happy and in ~lurve~. Living with rapists can do that.
Donna has dyed her hair blonde which according to Anita-Verse rules this means it is actually evil Mirror!Donna, because there are no decent, female blonde women with golden hair. Even Asher, a man, falls to this morality color wheel. Mirror!Donna and Anita chat about Anita’s work and the scars that result from it, and Mirror!Donna claims she now feels bad about making Anita wear a dress. The whole things feels just odd, as Mirror!Donna is both rude in that she keeps asking for details about the scars -because Edward has scars, too- and apologetic in regards to her clothing preference. You see, apparently the original plan was for Anita to wear a tux like she did for Larry Kirkland’s wedding back in Incubus Dreams, “You didn’t have to come; you could have told me to go to hell and you were wearing a tux like we planned.” (p.20)
Thus, for some unknown reason Donna suddenly decided that Anita had to wear a dress, which merited her flying out to New Mexico for a fitting, because there are no seamstresses in St. Louis that are willing to make emergency dress alterations. More proof in my opinion that this is not the Donna we met in Obsidian Butterfly. This is Mirror!Donna.
While on our trip down traumatic backstory lane Anita has a very meta thought about the lack of ache from her old wounds: “I had too much magic in my veins now, too much power. It made me more, or less, than pure human, depending on whom you asked. Micah wasn’t the only one who got casual death threats from hate groups.” (p.21)
Mirror!Donna, in an attempt to act human and make Anita feel better after her moment of self-reflection, hugs Anita. I am reminded of that Twilight Zone episodes when two different groups of aliens are pretending to be human, not realizing each are present. Sometimes people cry, Anita, tears don’t have an automatic off switch. Mirror!Donna, of course, isn’t a people and so turns off the waterworks as soon as she discovers yet another scar that is more interesting. Anita has been stabbed in the back with one of her own stakes. Like Edward. Like Larry.
I’m sensing a theme, here.
Anyway, shortly after this the second of the triple D’s appears from where she was evesdropping in the shadows like some kind of Assassin. Dixie doesn’t like Anita. Dixie thinks Anita is the Other Woman, and a slut, and that this whole wedding thing is a Bad Idea. To be fair Mirror!Donna agrees with everything she says and still doesn’t see anything wrong with having the woman your fiancé said she was sleeping with in the wedding party which makes Mirror!Donna, in Dixie’s opinion, an idiot. They’ve been in couple’s therapy, and Edward admitted to the lies and manipulation, so it’s all okay.
Clearly, Dixie knows something is wrong with Donna. Dixie is a good friend, and supposedly her best friend. Unfortunately, Dixie hasn’t yet realized her kind, patient person she’s known since highschool has been replaced with her evil twin from the Mirror!Verse and so when she moves to kick Anita and her boob-flashing butt out Mirror!Donna twists her arm and plants her in the floor. Something the Donna we knew NEVER would have done. Manhandling someone is NOT the go-to solution to disagreements!
Mirror!Donna then orders Anita to find Nathaniel and pick out a new dress -I’m still wondering what the logic behind getting rid of the Tux was- while Mirror!Donna handles the betrayed, crying Dixie.
I really, really hope therapy isn’t involved.
Dixie is a bit of a bitch, but I understand where she’s coming from, and she doesn’t deserve to get replaced by a Podixie.
Anita-> Other Women! My One Weakness!
Donna-> Ohnoe! Your Scars clash horribly with that dress!
Dixie-> It's the Easy 'A'! (Also her shirt says: I'm with stupid.)
SERPENTINE: CHAPTER TWO
IN WHICH DONNA IS TRAPPED IN THE MIRROR!VERSE
Anita, the most experienced and hardcore vampire hunter in the world, somehow misses the approach of a housewife and drops a boob in her surprise. This is a stupid unnecessary gag, but very Anita. Donna laughs and looks away and Anita goes into raptures on how pretty and youthful she looks because being happy makes you pretty. Personally, I find this hilarious, because one of the few consistencies Anita has had over the series is her own self-esteem and appreciation of her own body. She almost always needs someone to tell her how pretty she is even if she isn’t blonde and thin.
I can only assume this is Anita subconsciously admitting she isn’t happy and in ~lurve~. Living with rapists can do that.
Donna has dyed her hair blonde which according to Anita-Verse rules this means it is actually evil Mirror!Donna, because there are no decent, female blonde women with golden hair. Even Asher, a man, falls to this morality color wheel. Mirror!Donna and Anita chat about Anita’s work and the scars that result from it, and Mirror!Donna claims she now feels bad about making Anita wear a dress. The whole things feels just odd, as Mirror!Donna is both rude in that she keeps asking for details about the scars -because Edward has scars, too- and apologetic in regards to her clothing preference. You see, apparently the original plan was for Anita to wear a tux like she did for Larry Kirkland’s wedding back in Incubus Dreams, “You didn’t have to come; you could have told me to go to hell and you were wearing a tux like we planned.” (p.20)
Thus, for some unknown reason Donna suddenly decided that Anita had to wear a dress, which merited her flying out to New Mexico for a fitting, because there are no seamstresses in St. Louis that are willing to make emergency dress alterations. More proof in my opinion that this is not the Donna we met in Obsidian Butterfly. This is Mirror!Donna.
While on our trip down traumatic backstory lane Anita has a very meta thought about the lack of ache from her old wounds: “I had too much magic in my veins now, too much power. It made me more, or less, than pure human, depending on whom you asked. Micah wasn’t the only one who got casual death threats from hate groups.” (p.21)
Mirror!Donna, in an attempt to act human and make Anita feel better after her moment of self-reflection, hugs Anita. I am reminded of that Twilight Zone episodes when two different groups of aliens are pretending to be human, not realizing each are present. Sometimes people cry, Anita, tears don’t have an automatic off switch. Mirror!Donna, of course, isn’t a people and so turns off the waterworks as soon as she discovers yet another scar that is more interesting. Anita has been stabbed in the back with one of her own stakes. Like Edward. Like Larry.
I’m sensing a theme, here.
Anyway, shortly after this the second of the triple D’s appears from where she was evesdropping in the shadows like some kind of Assassin. Dixie doesn’t like Anita. Dixie thinks Anita is the Other Woman, and a slut, and that this whole wedding thing is a Bad Idea. To be fair Mirror!Donna agrees with everything she says and still doesn’t see anything wrong with having the woman your fiancé said she was sleeping with in the wedding party which makes Mirror!Donna, in Dixie’s opinion, an idiot. They’ve been in couple’s therapy, and Edward admitted to the lies and manipulation, so it’s all okay.
Clearly, Dixie knows something is wrong with Donna. Dixie is a good friend, and supposedly her best friend. Unfortunately, Dixie hasn’t yet realized her kind, patient person she’s known since highschool has been replaced with her evil twin from the Mirror!Verse and so when she moves to kick Anita and her boob-flashing butt out Mirror!Donna twists her arm and plants her in the floor. Something the Donna we knew NEVER would have done. Manhandling someone is NOT the go-to solution to disagreements!
Mirror!Donna then orders Anita to find Nathaniel and pick out a new dress -I’m still wondering what the logic behind getting rid of the Tux was- while Mirror!Donna handles the betrayed, crying Dixie.
I really, really hope therapy isn’t involved.
Dixie is a bit of a bitch, but I understand where she’s coming from, and she doesn’t deserve to get replaced by a Podixie.
Anita-> Other Women! My One Weakness!
Donna-> Ohnoe! Your Scars clash horribly with that dress!
Dixie-> It's the Easy 'A'! (Also her shirt says: I'm with stupid.)