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saberivojo March 25 2012, 02:15:35 UTC
“Don’t point it at no one unless you wanna shoot ‘em, always ‘ssume it’s loaded, a gun is not a toy,” he rattles off. Finishes with a smile because he knows he got all of John’s rules right.

Again, not the first or second time we have written almost the same thing!

What a great job. As usual, I want to shake John, or smack him really, really hard. But underneath all the dysfunction, all the anger and worry is a man who loves his boys.

Our Johns are so close it is so staggering. I guess I tend to go for the "happier" ending and you go for the angsty one!

I will go back and re-read just because I can. Well, done!

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purple_carpets March 25 2012, 10:03:40 UTC
You don't wanna know how many "how to teach your kindergardener to shoot a gun because that's totally the reasonable thing to do" sites I had to visit to come up with even those three rules. Why can't I be part of a fandom that's all about...idk...pizza? Pizza is much less confusing than guns. I'm still fairly sure I got a magority of the shooting scene entirely wrong.

(Seriously? Pizza? Girl, get yourself some coffee!)

No, he clearly LOVES those boys, he's just really, incredibly terrible at showing it, especially in a situation like this where he's already drained and scared and desperate. I don't think he was always like that. Actually, I imagine him a lot like your John most of the time, I just don't tend to write about the happy times when he would have actually cracked a smile.

:)

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zara_zee March 25 2012, 11:20:07 UTC
Oh wow. You really nailed John's headspace in this...and it must've been a scary, scary place to be! You foreshadowed the men that the boys are destined to become so well too. Great job! :)

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purple_carpets March 26 2012, 09:19:27 UTC
Oh, it is. John's head is not a pretty place at all. But it's okay as long as you go in armed with booze ^^

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somer March 25 2012, 12:01:54 UTC
Awww John...and Sam and damnit and Deeeaaaan!! The Mutism, *sniffs* Bambi, Sammy's pouts, the target practice! So, so many perfect little details.

I want to hug him, then kick John where it hurts, then hug him tight again, that ambigious, scruffy, hot little bastard (sorry, got sidetracked there a little). God, I love these stories about John dealing with his kids, trying to do the best he can, knowing for himself he does a poor job but he doesn't know how else he's supposed to protect his children. Oh man...

Loved this :D

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purple_carpets March 26 2012, 09:28:53 UTC
I knowwww. They're all so damaged and breakable! I'm not quite sure which hurt!Winchester comm I'm supposed to crosspost this to, because damnit, they're all hurting!

Thank you so much. I'm glad you enjoy my John. and he IS entirely too hot to be real shut up, ovaries, he's old enough to be your father!

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biketest March 25 2012, 13:15:19 UTC
Wow. This story is so emotionally draining. That ending was absolutely heartbreaking. Everyone was so in character. This is one of the most interesting points in the Supernatural timeline for me and I've never read John's POV of it before. I really love how you can make me feel so sad for John and sympathetic towards him but not pretend he wasn't a terrible father. Great job, as usual!!!

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purple_carpets March 26 2012, 09:32:43 UTC
This is one of the most interesting points in the Supernatural timeline for me and I've never read John's POV of it before.

Exactly! I kept mulling over at least five different plot bunnies for this BB and nothing seemed to work and I was this close to dropping out and then this suddenly hit me.

That's my all-time pet peeve. People who can't see that you can be a terrible parent without hating your kids (daddy issues? Me? Never!). It used to drive me crazy that it's nearly impossible to find fic that shows John in that light, so now I've pretty much resigned myself to writing it myself ^^

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purple_carpets March 26 2012, 09:39:56 UTC
Oh, wow, thank you so much.

The whole idea was that even though Dean said they never talked about the shtriga incident again, that doesn't mean it didn't affect them and they didn't not deal with it in their own screwed up way. *steps off soap box*

:)

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