Title: Your friends can discover
Title: Your friends can discover
By Fianna9
Sequel “What your enemy can see”
Verse: G1
Rating: PG13
Warnings: Cybertronian cursing, mention of slash and sticky interface, mpreg(in nongendered mechanical beings)
Disclaimer: I don’t own Transformers. More the pity.
Summary: Well, they had to figure it out sometime…
It’s not based on a prompt for the challenge, but the bunny really wouldn’t leave me alone.
A/N: grounded = seeker slang for Praxian doorwing mechs (flightless descendents of seekers) wing-spawn = derogatory Praxian slang for seekers
For purposes of these stories, doorwing Praxians are about 17 feet tall in root form.
Thank you Darkeyes_17 for looking the first version over. I’m responsible for any mistakes. Constructive criticism is always welcome.
Weird behavior was fairly typical in the asylum known as the Ark.
Hound and Trailbreaker were only happy coming back from patrol if they were filthy; Tracks and Sunstreaker-unwilling to put up with the mess reaching the Common room-would intercept the two of them in the hallway and drag them off to the wash racks. Sideswipe got bored and pranked anything that moved (and a few things that didn’t just to be fair); Wheeljack caused something to blow up in his lab every other Tuesday. Bluestreak would talk your audios off about nothing, and Prowl took on more work than four mechs could normally accomplish.
Prowl had always been willing to listen to Bluestreak, even if he worked while he was doing so, but lately he had begun seeking the younger Praxian out. Shortly before the creation of the Aerialbots, Prowl started mentoring Streetwise. After the new fliers came online, Prowl set aside part of each week to tell stories about Cybertron, and the audience had grown to included the Dinobots, Bumblebee, Fireflight, Groove and Bluestreak. Most of the Autobots were glad that story time kept bored younglings from creating more trouble and that Prowl was taking time off from work.
Lately, however, things had been getting stranger on the Ark. Frightened for their lives, the twins hid for two days after Prowl caught Sideswipe touching Bluestreak’s doorwing. After Slingshot disregarded the new airspace restrictions, all of the Aerialbots were confined to quarters for three days. Hot Shot confided to Wheeljack that Prowl had literally washed Streetwise’s mouth out with cleanser for cursing in front of First Aid.
Everyone was hoping that Smokescreen could shed some light on this bizarre behavior now that he, Skyfire and Beachcomber had returned from their mission in Australia.
----------------------------
As the meeting drew to a close, Optimus brought up the last remaining topic in the debriefing, “Mirage, your report mentioned of potential conflict in the Decepticon hierarchy. Elaborate please.”
“I overheard Drag Strip and Wildrider mention someone blackmailing a superior.” Mirage looked down at the table for a moment. “Regrettably, they were approaching Soundwave, and I was unable to determine the identity of the parties being discussed, sir.”
Jazz took over. “We’ve been trying to determine who their talking about, Prime, but there’s not a lot of information to go by. The best current theory is that Screamer did something covertly against Megatron, and somebot knows it.”
Prowl frowned at his datapad. “I recommend increased patrols and more intensive security.” His sensory panels twitched spasmodically as he looked up and stared at the wall.
Ironhide shook his head. “Red will love that, but isn’t it overkill? We don’t know if it’s even happening.”
Prowl slammed both servos on the table. “Any change to the dynamics within the Decepticon command could radically alter their typical operations and activities. We should be cautious until we have further evidence.” Standing abruptly, Prowl spun to face Optimus as he spoke. “Safety is of the foremost importance. I will send out the new patrol shits tonight and coordinate with Red Alert.” Without further word or dismissal, Prowl turned and stomped across the room.
Jazz glanced quickly at Optimus for permission before headed towards the angry tactician. “Prowler, wait up.” Ignoring his call, the SiC stormed out the door and knocked Warpath out of his way. No one said a word or moved as the TiC chased after him, muttering apologies to Warpath as he went.
Staring dumbfounded, Optimus turned and looked at Ratchet, who simply stood up. “I’ve already got Prowl scheduled for a system check. Either he’s got a processor malfunction or his glitch is corrupted.” At the disbelieving looks, he snarled, “Explain that otherwise,” and gestured towards the door.
Alarms suddenly sounded throughout the base. Prowl’s strange behavior was shelved as everyone rushed outside to face the Decepticons.
--------------------------
Although the Aerialbots had started the battle in the skies engaging the Seekers, Menasor’s attempts to step on Bluestreak and Perceptor forced an early merger into Superion. Since the Aerialbots could no longer keep the Seekers busy, the twins decided to try jet judo on the Coneheads. Sideswipe jumped onto Dirge’s back as planned, but Ramjet took aim and shot the twin in the right leg causing him to fall. An enraged Sunstreaker, ignoring all orders to the contrary, leaped from Thrust onto Dirge and tried to rip the Conehead’s wings off.
Shortly after the fighting began, Omega Supreme had engaged Blitzwing and Octane, who where attempting to tag team the much larger guardian. Hound, Beachcomber and Trailbreaker were uncomfortably close at hand warding off the Insecticons. Prowl had been explicit; Bombshell was to be kept away from Omega.
Nearby, Soundwave was battling Blaster for control of communication lines, while Eject and Rewind fought Frenzy and Buzzsaw. Smokescreen was trying to shoot Ratbat, who had latched onto Bumblebee’s back and was tearing through his plating.
Upon spotting one another, Bruticus and Defensor immediately began tossing each other across the landscape. After one particularly brutal shove, Defensor almost landed on Wheeljack, but Omega Supreme caught him by the left arm and threw him back at Bruticus. The resulting collision kept both gestalts preoccupied for a little while.
Gears and Huffer, tired of being chased by Astrotrain, dove behind some boulders to escape and found Sideswipe. Although Ironhide shooting at him diverted Astrotrain, the three Autobots wound up pinned down and exchanging fire with Reflector, Rumble and Lazerbeak.
Devastator quickly encountered the Dinobots, who seemed delighted to have the larger opponent to fight. Grimlock unsuccessfully attempted to bite Devastator. Slag got kicked across the battlefield, but he simply stood up and charged right back into the fray. Roaring loudly, the Dinobots charged straight into the larger Decepticon. Sludge and Snarl crashed into Devastator’s left leg and knocked the gestalt over. The Constructicons broker apart and continued to engage the Dinobots.
Optimus and Megatron were center stage in the battle, yelling and snarling at each other as they dodged laser fire. Optimus was acting as a successful distraction as Jazz and Mirage attempted to disarm the latest superweapon. Starscream and Thundercracker set up for a strafing run, but Prowl and Cliffjumper managed to divert them with well-placed shots.
Everything changed right after an unlucky shot from Skywarp hit Prowl in the back of his right shoulder, knocking him to the ground. Cliffjumper called out for a medic. The Dinobots were the closest to Prowl’s location, so Swoop broke off from attacking Mixmaster and got to him first. After carrying Prowl to the slightly sheltered area Ratchet had designated for field repairs, Swoop set out to examine him.
----------------------
“I do not need a medic; the damage is not severe.” Despite having been dragged off to the side, Prowl adamantly did not want to be worked on. Swoop simply pressed a knee onto Prowl’s back and forced him to lay still.
That distraction taken care of, Swoop looked down at the scanner he was holding, staring at it perplexed. He smacked the apparently malfunctioning unit and scanned the pinned mech again. “Me Swoop think thing broken. Him Wheeljack need fix.”
Ratchet looked up from where he was examining Windcharger’s helm. An earlier impact with Wildrider had dented it and severely addled the poor minbot’s processor. “What does it say, Swoop? We don’t need ‘Jack blowing up any more of my equipment.” Even in these working conditions, Ratchet always tried to help his most junior medic.
“Scanner say him Prowl have broken spark.” Swoop got up and stepped over--releasing Prowl in the process--and held the unit out for Ratchet to see.
Ratchet lunged forward, grabbed the scanner and stared at the readings. Ratchet glared over at the now crouched Prowl, “How? Who? Nevermind, I know who!” Turning sharply and starting to run off, he gestured Swoop towards Windcharger, “Look after them. Especially Prowl! Primus, why now?”
Swoop looked back at Prowl, who had already clamored to his feet and was chasing after Ratchet. Determined to keep track of both patients, Swoop picked up a not-protesting Windcharger and headed after Prowl. “Me Swoop find something important. What Me Swoop find?”
----------------------------
“You slaggin’ glitch-spawned pit-raised spark! I’m gonna reformat you into a telephone. No, a fraggin’ electric toothbrush so those two hellions can use you to clean the friggin’ brig.” Completely ignoring all combat around him, Ratchet hurdled a wrench across the battlefield at Jazz, striking a solid blow to the back of his helm. Yanking another wrench out of subspace, Ratchet again took aim at Jazz, who was scrambling away from the enraged medic utterly confused. “You crazy, aftheaded lunatic. How dare you? Fraggin’ dangerous! Utterly moronic.” Prowl charged up behind Ratchet and grappled his arm. Surprising all in the immediate vicinity, Ratchet did not attempt to hit or toss aside Prowl. Instead, he kept screaming at Jazz. “Primus help me…when I get my servos on you, I’ll rip both your fraggin’ legs off and use them as ‘Jack’s next set of crutches. Your Unicron-spawned aft is gonna be a paperweight. Swoop! I said get him out of harms way!”
By now, practically everyone was had stopped fighting as the surreal scene unfolded. Swoop thrust a thoroughly confused Windcharger into Ironhide’s surprised servos. Ignoring the thrashing and movement, Swoop lunged forward, reached under the sensory panels and lifted Prowl straight into the air cradling him against his chest.
Swoop, still holding a squirming Prowl, turned to the closest mechs, who just happened to be the Dinobots and Constructicons. All of them were staring at the apparently insane medic. “Me Swoop wanna know why a broken spark make him Ratchet get so mad.”
Flickering his optics, Hook glanced at Ratchet as the medic continued his previously aborted pursuit of Jazz, racing in a dizzying circle around Megatron and Optimus. “What do you mean, a broken spark? Sparks dissipate; they don’t break.”
“Me Swoop know that.” He tossed his head impatiently. “Me Swoop tell him Ratchet that him Prowl have broken spark. Him Ratchet look at scanner and get mad. Him Ratchet chase after him Jazz saying it him Jazz’s fault. Me Swoop confused.”
Hook started laughing, startling Slag and Sludge. Looking up at a grumpy Prowl, he yelled, “You’re sparked! Swindle! Pay up!”
Menasor and Bruticus broke apart as the Decepticon soldiers clamored around Swoop and Prowl, completely ignoring Megatron’s shouting to get the crazy medic away from him.
Taking out the official datapad of bets, Swindle said, “Okay, okay. Let me get things straight so the proper mechs get paid.”
“Paid?” Prowl sputtered. Swoop was attempting to keep him out of range of Decepticon servos, but the smirking soldiers didn’t seem interested in hurting the smaller tactician.
“Frag yah, we’ve been betting on you two for vorns.” Vortex drawled, amused at the look of horror on the chief tactician’s face.
“Okay, Octane and Buzzsaw were the only ones to bet on the Dinobots finding out, so…”
“Don’t even think about it Swindle.” Drag Strip said from the back of the cluster.
“Yeah, Swoop didn’t figure it out, he just pointed it out to Ratchet.” Wildrider said, glaring at the Dinobot.
Grimlock pushed his way into the middle and stared threateningly down at Wildrider. “Me Grimlock say him Swoop found out. What him Swoop find?”
“That Prowl and Jazz are fragging.” Astrotrain sneered.
Smokescreen, from the outside of the circle, bellowed out, “You’re what?” just as Cliffjumper yelled, “What in the Pit do you mean, Jazz is fraggin’ Prowl?”
Smokescreen smacked Cliffjumper on the helm. “No cursing in front of Bumblebee.”
Bumblebee stared at Smokescreen in disbelief as Cliffjumper snapped back, “Then tell Ratchet to shut up.”
Looking back at Ratchet-who was now chasing Jazz around a thoroughly confused Optimus and an amused Megatron-Smokescreen scoffed, “He doesn’t count, and I’m not suicidal.”
As the Autobots were arguing, Astrotrain’s face morphed into shock when Grimlock said, “Us Dinobots know that. What new thing him Swoop find?”
“How long have you known?” Hook was genuinely curious. Most of the Decepticons had assumed that the Dinobots didn’t know what interfacing was.
“Us Dinobots watch David Attenborough. Me Grimlock know him Jazz and him Prowl always courting.”
“Okay, back to business, the Dinobot bets win.” Swindle was not about to get into a brawl right now. Not when this many credits and that much high grade were on the line.
“It was definitely the sparkling that did it.” Ramjet piped up from above. None of the Seekers wanted within range of Sunstreaker, so they were all hovering about the masses. “But that doesn’t help; almost everyone bet on that.”
“Me Snarl still not know what him Swoop find,” grumbled the large stegosaurus.
“Me Swoop understand now. Him Prowl carrying baby spark. Us Dinobots get new Autobot to play with.” Swoop pulled Prowl even closer, optics wary of the Decepticons crowded around them.
“Me Slag no want to play with sissy Autobot.”
Sludge transformed and glared at Slag. “Me Sludge wanna play with Uncle Prowl’s little Autobot.”
“Uncle Prowl?” Cliffjumper piped up from the back. He still wanted to shoot the Decepticons but wasn’t willing to risk them attacking the tactician.
“Could we get back to the bets please? You can argue about who gets to be the little bitlet’s playbuddy later. There are some questions we need answered.” Scrapper was trying to redirect the conversation, since the Dinobots looked ready to come to blows over whether or not the new Autobot would be a good playmate. While it was always entertaining to watch them destroy the landscape, it was doubtful that Swoop would allow questioning of Prowl to continue while his brothers’ fought in front of him.
Jazz, apparently having realized that the leaders were getting annoyed with being used as obstacles, transformed and raced by. “Sorry, mate, but he’s gonna ofline me if he catches me.” Ratchet transformed and took off after him, sirens blaring.
“I am not answering any questions.” Prowl pouted. “Swoop, put me down. That’s an order.”
“Like the pit you aren’t, grounded,” Ramjet laughed from overhead. “If you wanted a sparkling, all you had to do was ask. Any of us would have done it.”
Prowl snapped, “Why would I want you? All your kind think we’re good for is taking care of sparklings.”
“Seriously,” Thrust sneered from slightly above them, “what’d he have on you that would make you let a groundpounder frag you?”
“Nothing, wing-spawn. It was logical for me to carry a sparkling. Jazz has a much higher probability of receiving battlefield damage. Brooding had nothing to do with it.” Prowl crossed his servos across his chest and sulked.
“I told you.” Onslaught was leaning against a rock and sipping an energon cube. “Manipulation at its finest.”
“Of course we do. That’s what you do, isn’t it?” Thundercracker smirked. “You latch on to as many sparklings as you can and happily take care of them.”
Smokescreen moaned, a horrified look of comprehension on his face. “You really are brooding.”
Dirge stared at Smokescreen in disbelief. “A bonded grounded has surrounded himself with younglings and is acting as a fraggin’ nursebot. Of course he’s brooding.”
“I suppose you’re going to kill us now to protect your sparkling.” Dead End looked up at Prowl and sighed.
As Motormaster turned and started to smack Dead End, Prowl twisted and slipped out of Swoop’s arms. “You do NOT hit your brother.” He forced his way between Motormaster and Dead End, doorwings arched high above his shoulders. “No one bothers to teach proper manners anymore. Are you all right?” Pulling a startled Dead End away from his leader, Prowl began checking the confused Decepticon for injuries. Prowl didn’t seem to care that he was still surrounded, but Grimlock and Snarl were keeping a sharp optic on him. “Come on, once Ratchet stops chasing my bondmate, we’ll get you properly repaired.” Prowl and the flanking Dinobots began moving through the Decepticon ranks, hustling Dead End off towards the Ark.
Swindle groaned and turned towards Starscream. “You win. He fraggin’ adopted a Stunticon.”
Megatron stared at Starscream in disbelief. “You knew that this would happen?” Enraged, he pointed his fusion cannon at the Seeker.
Judging by Starscream’s smirk as he darted away, the looks of shock and horror on the Autobots’ faces was worth it.
By Fianna9
Sequel “What your enemy can see”
Verse: G1
Rating: PG13
Warnings: Cybertronian cursing, mention of slash and sticky interface, mpreg(in nongendered mechanical beings)
Disclaimer: I don’t own Transformers. More the pity.
Summary: Well, they had to figure it out sometime…
It’s not based on a prompt for the challenge, but the bunny really wouldn’t leave me alone.
A/N: grounded = seeker slang for Praxian doorwing mechs (flightless descendents of seekers) wing-spawn = derogatory Praxian slang for seekers
For purposes of these stories, doorwing Praxians are about 17 feet tall in root form.
Thank you Darkeyes_17 for looking the first version over. I’m responsible for any mistakes. Constructive criticism is always welcome.
Weird behavior was fairly typical in the asylum known as the Ark.
Hound and Trailbreaker were only happy coming back from patrol if they were filthy; Tracks and Sunstreaker-unwilling to put up with the mess reaching the Common room-would intercept the two of them in the hallway and drag them off to the wash racks. Sideswipe got bored and pranked anything that moved (and a few things that didn’t just to be fair); Wheeljack caused something to blow up in his lab every other Tuesday. Bluestreak would talk your audios off about nothing, and Prowl took on more work than four mechs could normally accomplish.
Prowl had always been willing to listen to Bluestreak, even if he worked while he was doing so, but lately he had begun seeking the younger Praxian out. Shortly before the creation of the Aerialbots, Prowl started mentoring Streetwise. After the new fliers came online, Prowl set aside part of each week to tell stories about Cybertron, and the audience had grown to included the Dinobots, Bumblebee, Fireflight, Groove and Bluestreak. Most of the Autobots were glad that story time kept bored younglings from creating more trouble and that Prowl was taking time off from work.
Lately, however, things had been getting stranger on the Ark. Frightened for their lives, the twins hid for two days after Prowl caught Sideswipe touching Bluestreak’s doorwing. After Slingshot disregarded the new airspace restrictions, all of the Aerialbots were confined to quarters for three days. Hot Shot confided to Wheeljack that Prowl had literally washed Streetwise’s mouth out with cleanser for cursing in front of First Aid.
Everyone was hoping that Smokescreen could shed some light on this bizarre behavior now that he, Skyfire and Beachcomber had returned from their mission in Australia.
----------------------------
As the meeting drew to a close, Optimus brought up the last remaining topic in the debriefing, “Mirage, your report mentioned of potential conflict in the Decepticon hierarchy. Elaborate please.”
“I overheard Drag Strip and Wildrider mention someone blackmailing a superior.” Mirage looked down at the table for a moment. “Regrettably, they were approaching Soundwave, and I was unable to determine the identity of the parties being discussed, sir.”
Jazz took over. “We’ve been trying to determine who their talking about, Prime, but there’s not a lot of information to go by. The best current theory is that Screamer did something covertly against Megatron, and somebot knows it.”
Prowl frowned at his datapad. “I recommend increased patrols and more intensive security.” His sensory panels twitched spasmodically as he looked up and stared at the wall.
Ironhide shook his head. “Red will love that, but isn’t it overkill? We don’t know if it’s even happening.”
Prowl slammed both servos on the table. “Any change to the dynamics within the Decepticon command could radically alter their typical operations and activities. We should be cautious until we have further evidence.” Standing abruptly, Prowl spun to face Optimus as he spoke. “Safety is of the foremost importance. I will send out the new patrol shits tonight and coordinate with Red Alert.” Without further word or dismissal, Prowl turned and stomped across the room.
Jazz glanced quickly at Optimus for permission before headed towards the angry tactician. “Prowler, wait up.” Ignoring his call, the SiC stormed out the door and knocked Warpath out of his way. No one said a word or moved as the TiC chased after him, muttering apologies to Warpath as he went.
Staring dumbfounded, Optimus turned and looked at Ratchet, who simply stood up. “I’ve already got Prowl scheduled for a system check. Either he’s got a processor malfunction or his glitch is corrupted.” At the disbelieving looks, he snarled, “Explain that otherwise,” and gestured towards the door.
Alarms suddenly sounded throughout the base. Prowl’s strange behavior was shelved as everyone rushed outside to face the Decepticons.
--------------------------
Although the Aerialbots had started the battle in the skies engaging the Seekers, Menasor’s attempts to step on Bluestreak and Perceptor forced an early merger into Superion. Since the Aerialbots could no longer keep the Seekers busy, the twins decided to try jet judo on the Coneheads. Sideswipe jumped onto Dirge’s back as planned, but Ramjet took aim and shot the twin in the right leg causing him to fall. An enraged Sunstreaker, ignoring all orders to the contrary, leaped from Thrust onto Dirge and tried to rip the Conehead’s wings off.
Shortly after the fighting began, Omega Supreme had engaged Blitzwing and Octane, who where attempting to tag team the much larger guardian. Hound, Beachcomber and Trailbreaker were uncomfortably close at hand warding off the Insecticons. Prowl had been explicit; Bombshell was to be kept away from Omega.
Nearby, Soundwave was battling Blaster for control of communication lines, while Eject and Rewind fought Frenzy and Buzzsaw. Smokescreen was trying to shoot Ratbat, who had latched onto Bumblebee’s back and was tearing through his plating.
Upon spotting one another, Bruticus and Defensor immediately began tossing each other across the landscape. After one particularly brutal shove, Defensor almost landed on Wheeljack, but Omega Supreme caught him by the left arm and threw him back at Bruticus. The resulting collision kept both gestalts preoccupied for a little while.
Gears and Huffer, tired of being chased by Astrotrain, dove behind some boulders to escape and found Sideswipe. Although Ironhide shooting at him diverted Astrotrain, the three Autobots wound up pinned down and exchanging fire with Reflector, Rumble and Lazerbeak.
Devastator quickly encountered the Dinobots, who seemed delighted to have the larger opponent to fight. Grimlock unsuccessfully attempted to bite Devastator. Slag got kicked across the battlefield, but he simply stood up and charged right back into the fray. Roaring loudly, the Dinobots charged straight into the larger Decepticon. Sludge and Snarl crashed into Devastator’s left leg and knocked the gestalt over. The Constructicons broker apart and continued to engage the Dinobots.
Optimus and Megatron were center stage in the battle, yelling and snarling at each other as they dodged laser fire. Optimus was acting as a successful distraction as Jazz and Mirage attempted to disarm the latest superweapon. Starscream and Thundercracker set up for a strafing run, but Prowl and Cliffjumper managed to divert them with well-placed shots.
Everything changed right after an unlucky shot from Skywarp hit Prowl in the back of his right shoulder, knocking him to the ground. Cliffjumper called out for a medic. The Dinobots were the closest to Prowl’s location, so Swoop broke off from attacking Mixmaster and got to him first. After carrying Prowl to the slightly sheltered area Ratchet had designated for field repairs, Swoop set out to examine him.
----------------------
“I do not need a medic; the damage is not severe.” Despite having been dragged off to the side, Prowl adamantly did not want to be worked on. Swoop simply pressed a knee onto Prowl’s back and forced him to lay still.
That distraction taken care of, Swoop looked down at the scanner he was holding, staring at it perplexed. He smacked the apparently malfunctioning unit and scanned the pinned mech again. “Me Swoop think thing broken. Him Wheeljack need fix.”
Ratchet looked up from where he was examining Windcharger’s helm. An earlier impact with Wildrider had dented it and severely addled the poor minbot’s processor. “What does it say, Swoop? We don’t need ‘Jack blowing up any more of my equipment.” Even in these working conditions, Ratchet always tried to help his most junior medic.
“Scanner say him Prowl have broken spark.” Swoop got up and stepped over--releasing Prowl in the process--and held the unit out for Ratchet to see.
Ratchet lunged forward, grabbed the scanner and stared at the readings. Ratchet glared over at the now crouched Prowl, “How? Who? Nevermind, I know who!” Turning sharply and starting to run off, he gestured Swoop towards Windcharger, “Look after them. Especially Prowl! Primus, why now?”
Swoop looked back at Prowl, who had already clamored to his feet and was chasing after Ratchet. Determined to keep track of both patients, Swoop picked up a not-protesting Windcharger and headed after Prowl. “Me Swoop find something important. What Me Swoop find?”
----------------------------
“You slaggin’ glitch-spawned pit-raised spark! I’m gonna reformat you into a telephone. No, a fraggin’ electric toothbrush so those two hellions can use you to clean the friggin’ brig.” Completely ignoring all combat around him, Ratchet hurdled a wrench across the battlefield at Jazz, striking a solid blow to the back of his helm. Yanking another wrench out of subspace, Ratchet again took aim at Jazz, who was scrambling away from the enraged medic utterly confused. “You crazy, aftheaded lunatic. How dare you? Fraggin’ dangerous! Utterly moronic.” Prowl charged up behind Ratchet and grappled his arm. Surprising all in the immediate vicinity, Ratchet did not attempt to hit or toss aside Prowl. Instead, he kept screaming at Jazz. “Primus help me…when I get my servos on you, I’ll rip both your fraggin’ legs off and use them as ‘Jack’s next set of crutches. Your Unicron-spawned aft is gonna be a paperweight. Swoop! I said get him out of harms way!”
By now, practically everyone was had stopped fighting as the surreal scene unfolded. Swoop thrust a thoroughly confused Windcharger into Ironhide’s surprised servos. Ignoring the thrashing and movement, Swoop lunged forward, reached under the sensory panels and lifted Prowl straight into the air cradling him against his chest.
Swoop, still holding a squirming Prowl, turned to the closest mechs, who just happened to be the Dinobots and Constructicons. All of them were staring at the apparently insane medic. “Me Swoop wanna know why a broken spark make him Ratchet get so mad.”
Flickering his optics, Hook glanced at Ratchet as the medic continued his previously aborted pursuit of Jazz, racing in a dizzying circle around Megatron and Optimus. “What do you mean, a broken spark? Sparks dissipate; they don’t break.”
“Me Swoop know that.” He tossed his head impatiently. “Me Swoop tell him Ratchet that him Prowl have broken spark. Him Ratchet look at scanner and get mad. Him Ratchet chase after him Jazz saying it him Jazz’s fault. Me Swoop confused.”
Hook started laughing, startling Slag and Sludge. Looking up at a grumpy Prowl, he yelled, “You’re sparked! Swindle! Pay up!”
Menasor and Bruticus broke apart as the Decepticon soldiers clamored around Swoop and Prowl, completely ignoring Megatron’s shouting to get the crazy medic away from him.
Taking out the official datapad of bets, Swindle said, “Okay, okay. Let me get things straight so the proper mechs get paid.”
“Paid?” Prowl sputtered. Swoop was attempting to keep him out of range of Decepticon servos, but the smirking soldiers didn’t seem interested in hurting the smaller tactician.
“Frag yah, we’ve been betting on you two for vorns.” Vortex drawled, amused at the look of horror on the chief tactician’s face.
“Okay, Octane and Buzzsaw were the only ones to bet on the Dinobots finding out, so…”
“Don’t even think about it Swindle.” Drag Strip said from the back of the cluster.
“Yeah, Swoop didn’t figure it out, he just pointed it out to Ratchet.” Wildrider said, glaring at the Dinobot.
Grimlock pushed his way into the middle and stared threateningly down at Wildrider. “Me Grimlock say him Swoop found out. What him Swoop find?”
“That Prowl and Jazz are fragging.” Astrotrain sneered.
Smokescreen, from the outside of the circle, bellowed out, “You’re what?” just as Cliffjumper yelled, “What in the Pit do you mean, Jazz is fraggin’ Prowl?”
Smokescreen smacked Cliffjumper on the helm. “No cursing in front of Bumblebee.”
Bumblebee stared at Smokescreen in disbelief as Cliffjumper snapped back, “Then tell Ratchet to shut up.”
Looking back at Ratchet-who was now chasing Jazz around a thoroughly confused Optimus and an amused Megatron-Smokescreen scoffed, “He doesn’t count, and I’m not suicidal.”
As the Autobots were arguing, Astrotrain’s face morphed into shock when Grimlock said, “Us Dinobots know that. What new thing him Swoop find?”
“How long have you known?” Hook was genuinely curious. Most of the Decepticons had assumed that the Dinobots didn’t know what interfacing was.
“Us Dinobots watch David Attenborough. Me Grimlock know him Jazz and him Prowl always courting.”
“Okay, back to business, the Dinobot bets win.” Swindle was not about to get into a brawl right now. Not when this many credits and that much high grade were on the line.
“It was definitely the sparkling that did it.” Ramjet piped up from above. None of the Seekers wanted within range of Sunstreaker, so they were all hovering about the masses. “But that doesn’t help; almost everyone bet on that.”
“Me Snarl still not know what him Swoop find,” grumbled the large stegosaurus.
“Me Swoop understand now. Him Prowl carrying baby spark. Us Dinobots get new Autobot to play with.” Swoop pulled Prowl even closer, optics wary of the Decepticons crowded around them.
“Me Slag no want to play with sissy Autobot.”
Sludge transformed and glared at Slag. “Me Sludge wanna play with Uncle Prowl’s little Autobot.”
“Uncle Prowl?” Cliffjumper piped up from the back. He still wanted to shoot the Decepticons but wasn’t willing to risk them attacking the tactician.
“Could we get back to the bets please? You can argue about who gets to be the little bitlet’s playbuddy later. There are some questions we need answered.” Scrapper was trying to redirect the conversation, since the Dinobots looked ready to come to blows over whether or not the new Autobot would be a good playmate. While it was always entertaining to watch them destroy the landscape, it was doubtful that Swoop would allow questioning of Prowl to continue while his brothers’ fought in front of him.
Jazz, apparently having realized that the leaders were getting annoyed with being used as obstacles, transformed and raced by. “Sorry, mate, but he’s gonna ofline me if he catches me.” Ratchet transformed and took off after him, sirens blaring.
“I am not answering any questions.” Prowl pouted. “Swoop, put me down. That’s an order.”
“Like the pit you aren’t, grounded,” Ramjet laughed from overhead. “If you wanted a sparkling, all you had to do was ask. Any of us would have done it.”
Prowl snapped, “Why would I want you? All your kind think we’re good for is taking care of sparklings.”
“Seriously,” Thrust sneered from slightly above them, “what’d he have on you that would make you let a groundpounder frag you?”
“Nothing, wing-spawn. It was logical for me to carry a sparkling. Jazz has a much higher probability of receiving battlefield damage. Brooding had nothing to do with it.” Prowl crossed his servos across his chest and sulked.
“I told you.” Onslaught was leaning against a rock and sipping an energon cube. “Manipulation at its finest.”
“Of course we do. That’s what you do, isn’t it?” Thundercracker smirked. “You latch on to as many sparklings as you can and happily take care of them.”
Smokescreen moaned, a horrified look of comprehension on his face. “You really are brooding.”
Dirge stared at Smokescreen in disbelief. “A bonded grounded has surrounded himself with younglings and is acting as a fraggin’ nursebot. Of course he’s brooding.”
“I suppose you’re going to kill us now to protect your sparkling.” Dead End looked up at Prowl and sighed.
As Motormaster turned and started to smack Dead End, Prowl twisted and slipped out of Swoop’s arms. “You do NOT hit your brother.” He forced his way between Motormaster and Dead End, doorwings arched high above his shoulders. “No one bothers to teach proper manners anymore. Are you all right?” Pulling a startled Dead End away from his leader, Prowl began checking the confused Decepticon for injuries. Prowl didn’t seem to care that he was still surrounded, but Grimlock and Snarl were keeping a sharp optic on him. “Come on, once Ratchet stops chasing my bondmate, we’ll get you properly repaired.” Prowl and the flanking Dinobots began moving through the Decepticon ranks, hustling Dead End off towards the Ark.
Swindle groaned and turned towards Starscream. “You win. He fraggin’ adopted a Stunticon.”
Megatron stared at Starscream in disbelief. “You knew that this would happen?” Enraged, he pointed his fusion cannon at the Seeker.
Judging by Starscream’s smirk as he darted away, the looks of shock and horror on the Autobots’ faces was worth it.