fic: Aureolin Fields of Solace
Title: Aureolin Fields of Solace
Author: prologuesized
Pairing: Akame
Rating: PG-13
Genre: AU, Romance, slight Angst?
Disclaimer: I own nothing but the story.
Summary: On the aureolin flower field near his grandparents' house on the countryside, Jin meets a lonely boy who flies a lone white kite on the turquoise summer sky, waiting for a change in the wind.
Author Note: ...I just felt like writing something now that I can, okay? So I wrote something. And it turned it growing longer than I expected and stuff.
...And I only realised halfway through writing this about the irony with the flower fields... I'M SORRY. IT'S SO SICKLY IRONIC, IT'S NOT EVEN FUNNY. IT WAS NOT INTENTIONAL.
Wordcount: 5,000
Aureolin Fields of Solace
It's a day of overwhelming heat that makes one's skin prickle with sweat even through the thin layers of clothes, a day where even breezes fail to grant any cooling. It's an untypical summer day on the countryside where Jin's been forced to spend his summer holiday at his father's childhood house in a stupid village where the neighbours live hundreds and hundreds metres away rather than just behind the wall, easily disturbed.
He removes the bandana he's wearing to wipe his sweaty forehead dry. It's disgusting, but he's sick of the air-conditioned interiors of the house where his family tries to lure him into playing cards and cardboard games for the hundredth time. Instead, he finds himself out under the hotly blaring sun, vulnerable to a motherfucking heatstroke, having no cover from the shadows from the inexistent clouds.
He picks up a yellow straw standing by the sandy road and continues his way nonetheless, taking in the countryside scenery he never was quite into. He positions the straw between his teeth and stretches maybe a bit exaggeratedly, but the heat is giving him a headache and he's been stupid enough to not think about taking a bottle of water along as he left.
On the right side of the road there is a bright yellow flower field that seems to continue forever. He looks high up at the sky and sees a small kite somewhere at the distance, far above the happy fields of rapeseed flowers, its white form almost like a lone cloud when surrounded by the turquoise sky.
When Jin squints his eyes much enough, he can detect a teenage boy around his age walking on the fields. The flowers have grown long enough to reach his chest so most of him remains unseen and he's too far for Jin to make out his face as he slowly walks, one hand extended towards the sky, probably holding the string to which the kite is attached.
Jin tears his eyes away from the sight that momentarily caught his attention amidst the never-ending boredom of the summer holiday and continues walking beside the road, picking up flowers to form a beautiful bundle he can give to his mother to put in a vase on the dinner table later when he returns. The heat is becoming unbearably overwhelming and not another person enters his field of vision as he walks. Everyone's probably hiding under the shadows granted by the roofs and the air-conditioning they've invested on, bottles of cool beer from the fridge in their hands.
Summer laziness is another thing entirely on the country side compared to a place like Tokyo. In Tokyo he spends his summers running around the city with his friends, seeing as many concerts from his favourite bands as he can and singing karaoke joyfully from the depths of his lungs. He misses being beaten by his friends Yamapi and Ryo in the game of billiards and class meet-ups where they secretly gamble and play strip poker, just for everyone's own amusement and teenage urges.
He lets out a long and frustrated exhale and wipes his sweaty neck with the back of his hand, pissed off at the summer's unusually high temperatures. He sits down by the road and lets his eyes go back to the only moving figures invading his vision, the boy and the kite far ahead on the flower fields, seemingly having no trouble with the stupid heat that Jin swears is purposefully trying to kill them all.
In the end, he rises back on his feet again and heads back towards the house, giving up with his quest to explore the small countryside place and maybe find downtown and see if something interesting would be there. He gives the flowers to his mother he finds sunbathing on the terrace before he continues upstairs to the room he and his younger brother Reio are sharing, grabs another attire of clothing with as thin and little fabric as possible and enters a cold shower to cool his head and get some sense in his numbed and melted thoughts.
Later the day they go to have dinner with his grandparents' old mates who openly ruffle his and Reio's hair and tell stories about the people of the little place. He finds out that not many people his age live within a ten kilometre radius and already feels depressed and bored about spending the entire holiday with his annoying brother Reio and perhaps a couple of curious kids maybe four or five years younger than him. It doesn't sound all too appealing.
"But I saw this one guy," he intervenes the conversation, sucking in cool lemonade from a straw. "On the rapeseed flower field."
The older people's eyes meet as their eyes meet worriedly, awakening Jin's interest. He sets his glass down and purses his lips, curious about the boy he previously passed straight to the class of the insignificant people around the place.
"That'd probably be Kamenashi Kazuya," his grandmother says. "But I wouldn't say he'd be all that much of a joy to be around, Jin. He's more of a... loner."
Jin shrugs and takes another sip of his lemonade, still not ready and convinced to drop the subject. His grandparents sigh and father stares at them with a worried expression on his face.
"Kamenashi's son?" he asks, probably familiar with the boy's parents. "But he used to be such a social charmer!"
The elders shake their hands and shrug all together, heavy looks in their eyes.
"No one knows why, but he's changed," the elderly man by the name of Kiyoshi-san answers. "Many years ago he suddenly became very distant with everyone. No one ever found out why, but he hasn't really been the same. Maybe it's the age. Perhaps things will change with time."
Hardly, Jin thinks to himself and looks out of the window to the cobalt blue sky. Things hardly changed on their own accord, he has learned, and sometimes adults were ignorant of the youth's problems.
He downs his lemonade and takes an evening walk by the flower fields again, this time covered with a dark veil of the night. The sound of insects penetrates the darkness, but the breeze and the boy dragging the kite are gone, the fields empty and seemingly untouched like something sacred.
He enters the flower fields himself, making his way through the tall straws and flowers that tickle his collarbone and make him squirm uneasily.
It feels like another place entirely, separated from the road and the trees and the houses further away. The deeper he walks in, the freer he feels, the more his breathing eases and lighter his steps become.
The faint but overwhelming smell of the rapeseed flowers invade his senses and make him lie down out of the sight of every probable random passerby. The sky is a shade of dark midnight blue and the amount of stars visible shake him up a bit at first. It isn't quite the same as in the lit and polluted metropolis of Tokyo. Not even nearly.
What he doesn't know is that just a few metres to his right someone else is lying on the ground too, sharing almost the same vision of the night-sky and feeling tightness in his chest as he remains unmoving to hide his existence successfully.
In the end Jin gets up on his feet and leaves. The soft and tiny petals of the flowers pleasantly brush against his skin as he makes his way through the field and back to the road where he turns around to give the night's last glance at the yellow sea of flowers before he returns home.
He'll come again the next day. He never really was one to listen to other people's opinions and warnings.
--
The next day he heads towards the field, the boy is there again. He walks through the sea of aureolin, tiny flowers and eyes Jin stiffly as he makes his way closer, using his arms to push the flowers out of his way as he tries to catch up with the lone figure still far ahead.
When he does, Kamenashi stands still in front of him, both hands wrapped around the long, white string as he studies the unfamiliar person in front of him warily. Jin tries to smile and greet the boy with an embarrassed smirk but Kamenashi turns his gaze away and starts walking ahead again away from him, ears obviously alerted to follow his next move.
"I'm Jin!" Jin cries out and makes a jolted dash after the other boy. "Akanishi Jin. My grandparents live over that house... right there," he explains and points. Kamenashi stops and turns around to see where Jin's finger is pointing. He nods and offers his hand warily, expression not saying all too much to him except that he probably wasn't all too comfortable having him around.
"Kamenashi Kazuya," the boy says, his voice chiming free from the tenseness and quietness Jin had been expecting to hear. "My home isn't really visible from here."
"Okay," Jin answers with a nod, feeling a bit jumpy but optimistic about the entire situation. "I saw you here yesterday too."
Kamenashi nods and Jin shadows his eyes with his hand as he looks up at the sky to the white kite flying above them, attached to Kame's string. "You have a nice kite."
"It's not really a kite," Kamenashi answers. "I'll show you," he continues and starts rolling the string around his hand, lowering the object towards them. Jin squints his eyes and does finally detect what the object actually is - a couple of sticks with a plain white t-shirt attached to them.
"You're flying a... shirt?" he chuckles and Kamenashi nods, setting the kite off again and loosing the string slowly from around his hand. "You gotta go with what you have if you aren't crafty."
Jin nods in agreement and turns his eyes back to the boy standing beside him, his neck arched back to follow his handmade toy. He keeps swallowing awkwardly and tries to think of something to say, anything to say, since Kamenashi doesn't strike him as much of a talker, nevermind his odd openness about some things like the kite.
"How old are you?" he asks the boy and Kamenashi turns his brown eyes at him, narrowed due to the brightness the flowers only seem to intensify.
"Eighteen," the boy answers. "A long time until I can get away from this place, that is."
Jin nods in sympathy. Kamenashi turns around again and starts walking. He follows the narrow path he makes among the flower field and tightens the knot of the bandana covering his head. Kamenashi wears a cowboy hat that has a string of rainbow-coloured beads on a string surrounding it. Jin chuckles and breaks a couple of short straws with flowers from the field and attaches them to the strings, making Kamenashi wince and budge slightly. A hand rises to examine his handiwork and Kamenashi only looks at him oddly before he continues his way. Jin tries not to feel too awkward about his impulses.
"My family lives in Tokyo," he tells. "We don't really have flower fields or stuff like this there-"
"Do you want to fly the kite?" Kamenashi asks as he turns around and offers the string to him. Jin stares at him stupidly and blinks, taking up the offer and holding the string stupidly, heat flushing to his cheeks.
"I've never really flied one," he mutters, feeling tense all of sudden. "I've only had these small planes that you can pilot with a handheld device but stuff like this is just..."
"City boy," Kamenashi snorts and rolls his eyes. "I wonder how in hell you ended up here in the middle of nowhere."
"It's because my grandparents-" Jin tries to start but Kamenashi's walking again. He tightens his lips and wearily follows the white shirt-kite above them. For some reason it isn't so difficult after all, but that could be because today the wind is sharp and strong, more prepared to carry the heavy object gracefully.
"You don't like it in here?" Jin tries to question as he follows the younger boy. Kamenashi shrugs as an answer and stays silent. It's almost as if the flower field would've swallowed his voice.
They fly the kite until the heat becomes unbearable for Jin and, sweating like a pig, he admits that he isn't able to stay outside for any longer if he doesn't want to start collapsing and throwing up like a pathetic idiot. Kamenashi shrugs as an answer and takes the kite from his hands, staring straight at him silently.
Still, Jin tries to reason, he has enjoyed the boy's company more than his family's, and Reio's probably been alright with the local kids as well. There's only so much time one can spend with one's own kin before being driven crazy.
"I'll come tomorrow too, okay?" he checks with his new acquaintance. Kamenashi answers with a wary nod. It doesn't really seem like he cares much.
Jin follows his promise nevertheless and, within about a week's time, starts calling the younger boy with a nickname Kame due to his slowness as he moves on the fields.
--
Attraction had been the last thing he had expected to feel towards Kame, but that's how things quickly become amidst the summer heat and aureolin rapeseed flower fields. He follows the younger boy like a stupid puppy content by only spending time with the target of his intense admiration.
They lie on the field, covered by the tall flowers and hidden from the outside world. Kame has the string of his shirt-kite tied to a knot around his wrist. The kite oddly circles them and makes fascinating jolts in the sky above them. Or maybe Jin finds them fascinating only because it's Kame he's spending his time with.
"You know, I expected you to be some super silent and shut-off whining kid from the local talk about you," he tells the boy and tries to meet his gaze but fails as it studies the deep blue sky above them, still cloudless. "You're not that bad."
"Okay," Kame answers. There's an odd aura of silent sadness around him as he listens to Jin speaking and it makes him grow worried about the boy.
He rolls on his stomach and starts fiddling with a straw in his hands before putting it in his mouth, just for the feeling of it. Kame's eyes turn to him, and Jin tries to smile, placing his cheek against the dry ground as he faces Kame.
"...Why are you so... uneasy around people?" he tries asking Kame. Kame's eyes falter and his gaze rises to the sky again. Jin tries attracting his attention again by shoving his shoulder gently. "Why the sudden change?"
Kame closes his eyes and breathes deeply in and out, his body relaxed. Jin knows he isn't listening anymore and sighs, sitting up.
Just for the spur of the moment, he bends down to catch Kame's lips for a brief kiss. He's however immediately returned back to reality by a harsh punch in the face that makes him fall over, wailing in pain. Kame's fast on his feet and running, the sound of him moving disappearing somewhere.
"KAME! I WAS JUST JOKING!" he tries bellowing as he gets back on his feet and scans the area for the younger boy, but Kame remains under the surface layer to fool his vision. He doesn't hear the sound of his moving anymore, and when he raises his gaze towards the sky to use the kite as a clue he finds it flying loosely further away. There's a heavy feeling of shame in his chest as the overwhelming desperation takes over him and he starts walking through the field, trying to go somewhere where he recalls Kame disappearing to.
"Kame, I'm serious! I was just joking! Come on! I won't do it again!" he tries yelling with a hoarse voice as he spins around and tries to catch a glimpse of the younger boy. "Kame, come on! Come on..!"
But he has no idea where the boy disappeared to. The flower fields open all around him so far ahead that he isn't able to detect where they start and end, never mind pinpoint a person among the little yellow flowers.
After a couple of hours worth of useless searching, he gives up and leaves. His parents give him strange and worried looks as he snaps at them for asking him where he's been and if he's thirsty and disappears to the shower where he tries to cool himself down and let out at least some of the heart-wrenching misery.
It had all just happened a bit too fast, and as Jin stares in the mirror, he sees a nasty bruise forming on his right cheekbone.
It's such a pain to look at.
--
Kame stops flying the kite that day. Maybe because the original one was now probably lost, that was likely. Jin finds himself missing the younger boy's company to the point of relentless frustration before they run together on the sandy road. Kame has his feet bare and hair pulled back on a ponytail, wary eyes watching him as they get closer, trying to predict his move. He glances around and seems somewhat relieved by a couple of smaller kids playing softball on one large yard.
"Hi," Jin tries to approach the man with a hoarse voice, stopping before him. Kame makes an abrupt stop as well, a sharp look in his eyes as he remains silent. Jin gulps.
"I'm sorry about that time," he tries explaining and Kame passes him like he suddenly would've turned into thin air. His muscles seem strained and his footsteps carry him faster than what Jin's used to. It makes him jog after him desperately and catch his wrist. Kame tries to struggle against his hold and yells so loud Jin can't help but let go.
The look in Kame's eyes is freezing. Jin bites his lip and feels tears swelling in his eyes.
It's too awkward.
"I'm sorry," Jin presses again. "I'm so sorry. I won't do it again, it was stupid. I was just joking."
"But that makes it all the worse, doesn't it?" Kame snaps at him, starting to walk ahead quickly again. "That you did it as a joke. That there's nothing behind it after all, that you just felt like doing something like that. It makes it all the worse."
"Well maybe I like you!" Jin tries to change his approach, catching up with Kame to walk beside him. "But you don't seem too happy about that either!"
"When are you leaving?" Kame asks coldly, eyes avoiding his. Jin swallows harshly, feeling a tight pressure around his chest. He doesn't really want to leave, but things being how they are, maybe it is for the best.
"Two weeks," he answers quietly. "...You want me to go already, don't you?"
"So I'm some summer fun for you?" Kame snaps at him again, stopping and turning to face him properly, arms crossed. "Maybe it's better you don't even try to pursue that. In two weeks you'll be gone again for god knows how many years, maybe for good. I see no point."
Kame's words hit a weak spot and Jin knows that there's truth behind them - starting anything now is absolutely pointless on a long run. He lets his gaze fall to the ground and shifts uncomfortably where he stands.
"You're right," he admits regrettably, clenching his fists. "...I'm sorry. I didn't think."
"You never do," Kame sighs but seems to soften a little. He even pulls him in an awkward and stiff embrace. Jin senses that it's not really what Kame wants, holding him close like that. It's odd how he still does it.
It sadly makes him only want to kiss him again. He feels lost.
Sometimes one just had to let go of things.
"Don't be so distant with people," he complains with a mutter against Kame's shoulder, arms hanging loosely against his sides. "I like you. You used to be liked, you know? Now everyone just avoids talking about you. It's unfair."
Kame lets go of him slowly and Jin squirms in front of him, feeling uneasy about the entire situation. He wonders where the days went when he felt at ease with the young boy rather than extremely bothered.
"My father owns a small inn," Kame suddenly starts chatting nonsense again, his steps slow again like he recalls better. "Downtown. It's not big, there aren't many visitors here, but sometimes the people who own the rapeseed flower fields come here to discuss business with the town people and workers and occasionally there are things like weddings where people from further away come to town and need a place to stay at. Other than that we sell my mother's handiwork. She does clothes and tablecloths and such."
Jin nods, taking in every word, trying to imagine Kame's life. Trying to imagine him standing quietly as he stares at the people around him like he often does, trying to find a peaceful and solitary place for himself to relax at.
"I wish you could take me to the city with you," Kame sighs, opening his arms wide as he walks, gaze directed at the bright sky, nevermind the blindingly blaring sun. "Take me away from here."
Jin stops, eyes staring widely at Kame again. As the younger man ceases hearing the sound of his footsteps on the sandy road, he turns around and looks at him with an apathetic look in his eyes.
Jin realises he's never really seen Kame smile before. Not really.
"I like you," Jin mumbles desperately, trying to see if Kame's words have any sort of confession in them. "I really, honestly, genuinely like you, Kame."
Kame only stands where he is, uneasy and sorrowful. Jin takes a few steps closer and the boy turns his head away. It's a rejection after all.
He grabs the younger boy's hand and starts walking uneasily. They reach the rapeseed flower fields and Kame guides him between the straws. Jin follows, the lost puppy he is, follows and feels himself blooming the same way the tiny flowers do with their soft aureolin petals.
Kame stops somewhere far away from the sandy road and pulls him in a small kiss. Jin feels his heart pounding against his chest and wraps his arms protectively around the younger boy's back, pulling him closer. The kiss is sweet and soft and their eyes are closed, but Jin can still somehow see the flower field surrounding the two of them from every direction.
It's their own world, separated from the isolated little countryside town. Jin feels the two of them blooming as he picks Kame up from the ground and spins him happily.
He doesn't want to remember the fact that he's leaving, that in a matter of days he'll be gone and out of Kame's life just like he's always been. Doesn't want to think of the time they'll be so far apart from each other they're only forced to forget. Let go.
"I remember you from when were kids," Kame whispers against his lips in his arms, his hands resting on Jin's shoulders. "I remember you and your stupid plastic toys that were cooler than my handmade wooden ones, I remember you and your sun-like smile when you played football on a hot summer day into a goal my father had built from sticks."
Jin wonders why he isn't able to remember, but he knows he's been around before. He just knows that there hasn't been anything interesting enough to remember, that the place has always been a goddamn boring hell compared to the city they live in. Now he wishes he would remember, though, because if what Kame's telling him is true then they've met before, they've known each other before the times the winds in Kame's lives changed direction and shut him down from the society.
He rocks Kame gently and kisses him on the lips again.
Their two weeks begin.
--
They build a new kite again. Lying side by side on the bright, yellow flower field, the fly the kite above them and hold each other's hands.
Kame doesn't let him climb over him, though. Kame keeps his distance and refuses to be touched too intimately or having his movements too restricted. If he tries, the younger boy grows unbearably stiff and withdrawn.
"It all happened here on this flower field," Kame talks quietly, his voice breaking the silence of the dark evening. The sound of the insects is loud and makes it difficult to make sense out of his words momentarily.
Jin lies still, his arms crossed behind his head. The shadows feel pleasant in contrast to the afternoon sun. He lies and listens, looking up at the sight of Kame's sitting form, back against him as he stares up at the darkening sky and tears petals off a bundle of flowers he holds in his hands.
"The wind was sharp," Kame whispers even more quietly with a shaking voice that makes Jin grow concerned. He doesn't dare to move though, not when Kame's talking about something that quickly becomes something he feels necessary to listen to. "It was a hot summer day when a man from the inn ran into me on that sandy road, dragged me to these flower fields and took me by force."
"...Huh?" Jin mumbles stupidly, sitting up himself. "Wait, what?"
He sees lonely tears running down Kame's cheeks as his head droops over his shoulders. Kame's eyes don't meet his gaze and his lips are tightly pressed together. Suddenly Jin knows the answer to all of his questions and it knocks the air out of his lungs with a force he never really thought was possible only psychologically.
"...Kame," he whispers and pulls the younger boy into a hug. "Oh fuck. No."
Kame doesn't really welcome his embrace, he doesn't really answer. Still, he isn't pulling away either. Jin holds him under the darkening sky as the younger boy's shaking hands let go of the flowers and lets them fall on the dry ground.
The sound of sobbing is etched to his memory so vividly he doesn't really believe he can ever forget it.
Suddenly he feels an overwhelming need to take Kame far away from the aureolin flower fields, to drag him away from the countryside and grant him the peace of mind he'll never be able to reach in his hometown anymore, no matter how hard he tries.
He breaks into tears as well, holding Kame close so tightly he fears he's hurting him. Kame doesn't object, though.
It's too vulnerable of a moment for each of them.
"The w-wind can always change," Jin sobs quietly in Kame's ear with a broken voice. Kame grips the fabric of his shirt in his fists and buries his face deeper in his shoulder. "T-the wind can always change."
--
Two weeks later Jin's family leaves.
Kame stands on the cobalt yellow flower fields and flies the kite with Jin's old and worn shirt on it as they drive by the fields on the sandy road.
The wind is weak that day.
--
Five years later Jin drives the streets on his way to his grandparents. He squints his eyes as a figure enters his vision from afar, standing on the sandy road under the overwhelmingly radiating heat of the sun with his thumb up, trying to hitch a ride. A field of bright yellow flowers bend in the wind and the boy's hair flutters.
Jin hits the breaks and pulls the window down. The smiling young man approaches him and stares at him from behind his brown-tinted sunglasses.
Realisation dawns him and his smile falters momentarily as his expression turns to confused. Jin gulps, chest feeling tight and heavy.
"...I was kind of hoping for a ride out of this place," Kame mumbles, pointing at his suitcase still on the road. The wind whisks the dry sand off the ground and Kame needs to cover his eyes with a hand to avoid getting its grains in his eyes. "If you're up for it."
"I have a wide bed in my apartment," Jin mumbles stupidly and flushes, slapping his palm over his mouth. Damn it. "I mean, in Tokyo. I have this... this... apartment. You could hang around for a while. I'm now going to my grandparents, though. You know. Some family stuff. Or something. You know."
Kame laughs a bit awkwardly and Jin grins apologetically.
"...So... with a small stop I'll get to my destination?" Kame tries asking him. Jin nods enthusiastically and taps the passenger's seat beside him, heart pounding loudly.
"Yeah. If you can handle my family first, that is."
"Deal," Kame smirks and goes to get his back. He throws it on the backseat before he himself sits on the passenger's seat and slams the door shut, smiling at him awkwardly.
Funny how both of them feel so out of breath after such a short conversation. ...It's the first one they've had in five years.
"Girlfriend? Boyfriend?" Kame asks him quickly. Jin's eyes widen as he stares at Kame, afraid to push on the car pedals and continue their way.
"N-no," he shakes his head, eyes still wide in shock. "Why?"
Kame leans over to kiss him and Jin feels his own fingers burying themselves in Kame's soft locks.
Some things just never die, he assumes. Not even with time.
Kame looks like the happiest person on earth, and Jin swears the spark in his eyes is a million times brighter than the entire flower field reflecting the sun's rays of light.
They laugh with ease and don't start driving for the duration of two blissful hours of aureolin happiness.
Author: prologuesized
Pairing: Akame
Rating: PG-13
Genre: AU, Romance, slight Angst?
Disclaimer: I own nothing but the story.
Summary: On the aureolin flower field near his grandparents' house on the countryside, Jin meets a lonely boy who flies a lone white kite on the turquoise summer sky, waiting for a change in the wind.
Author Note: ...I just felt like writing something now that I can, okay? So I wrote something. And it turned it growing longer than I expected and stuff.
...And I only realised halfway through writing this about the irony with the flower fields... I'M SORRY. IT'S SO SICKLY IRONIC, IT'S NOT EVEN FUNNY. IT WAS NOT INTENTIONAL.
Wordcount: 5,000
Aureolin Fields of Solace
It's a day of overwhelming heat that makes one's skin prickle with sweat even through the thin layers of clothes, a day where even breezes fail to grant any cooling. It's an untypical summer day on the countryside where Jin's been forced to spend his summer holiday at his father's childhood house in a stupid village where the neighbours live hundreds and hundreds metres away rather than just behind the wall, easily disturbed.
He removes the bandana he's wearing to wipe his sweaty forehead dry. It's disgusting, but he's sick of the air-conditioned interiors of the house where his family tries to lure him into playing cards and cardboard games for the hundredth time. Instead, he finds himself out under the hotly blaring sun, vulnerable to a motherfucking heatstroke, having no cover from the shadows from the inexistent clouds.
He picks up a yellow straw standing by the sandy road and continues his way nonetheless, taking in the countryside scenery he never was quite into. He positions the straw between his teeth and stretches maybe a bit exaggeratedly, but the heat is giving him a headache and he's been stupid enough to not think about taking a bottle of water along as he left.
On the right side of the road there is a bright yellow flower field that seems to continue forever. He looks high up at the sky and sees a small kite somewhere at the distance, far above the happy fields of rapeseed flowers, its white form almost like a lone cloud when surrounded by the turquoise sky.
When Jin squints his eyes much enough, he can detect a teenage boy around his age walking on the fields. The flowers have grown long enough to reach his chest so most of him remains unseen and he's too far for Jin to make out his face as he slowly walks, one hand extended towards the sky, probably holding the string to which the kite is attached.
Jin tears his eyes away from the sight that momentarily caught his attention amidst the never-ending boredom of the summer holiday and continues walking beside the road, picking up flowers to form a beautiful bundle he can give to his mother to put in a vase on the dinner table later when he returns. The heat is becoming unbearably overwhelming and not another person enters his field of vision as he walks. Everyone's probably hiding under the shadows granted by the roofs and the air-conditioning they've invested on, bottles of cool beer from the fridge in their hands.
Summer laziness is another thing entirely on the country side compared to a place like Tokyo. In Tokyo he spends his summers running around the city with his friends, seeing as many concerts from his favourite bands as he can and singing karaoke joyfully from the depths of his lungs. He misses being beaten by his friends Yamapi and Ryo in the game of billiards and class meet-ups where they secretly gamble and play strip poker, just for everyone's own amusement and teenage urges.
He lets out a long and frustrated exhale and wipes his sweaty neck with the back of his hand, pissed off at the summer's unusually high temperatures. He sits down by the road and lets his eyes go back to the only moving figures invading his vision, the boy and the kite far ahead on the flower fields, seemingly having no trouble with the stupid heat that Jin swears is purposefully trying to kill them all.
In the end, he rises back on his feet again and heads back towards the house, giving up with his quest to explore the small countryside place and maybe find downtown and see if something interesting would be there. He gives the flowers to his mother he finds sunbathing on the terrace before he continues upstairs to the room he and his younger brother Reio are sharing, grabs another attire of clothing with as thin and little fabric as possible and enters a cold shower to cool his head and get some sense in his numbed and melted thoughts.
Later the day they go to have dinner with his grandparents' old mates who openly ruffle his and Reio's hair and tell stories about the people of the little place. He finds out that not many people his age live within a ten kilometre radius and already feels depressed and bored about spending the entire holiday with his annoying brother Reio and perhaps a couple of curious kids maybe four or five years younger than him. It doesn't sound all too appealing.
"But I saw this one guy," he intervenes the conversation, sucking in cool lemonade from a straw. "On the rapeseed flower field."
The older people's eyes meet as their eyes meet worriedly, awakening Jin's interest. He sets his glass down and purses his lips, curious about the boy he previously passed straight to the class of the insignificant people around the place.
"That'd probably be Kamenashi Kazuya," his grandmother says. "But I wouldn't say he'd be all that much of a joy to be around, Jin. He's more of a... loner."
Jin shrugs and takes another sip of his lemonade, still not ready and convinced to drop the subject. His grandparents sigh and father stares at them with a worried expression on his face.
"Kamenashi's son?" he asks, probably familiar with the boy's parents. "But he used to be such a social charmer!"
The elders shake their hands and shrug all together, heavy looks in their eyes.
"No one knows why, but he's changed," the elderly man by the name of Kiyoshi-san answers. "Many years ago he suddenly became very distant with everyone. No one ever found out why, but he hasn't really been the same. Maybe it's the age. Perhaps things will change with time."
Hardly, Jin thinks to himself and looks out of the window to the cobalt blue sky. Things hardly changed on their own accord, he has learned, and sometimes adults were ignorant of the youth's problems.
He downs his lemonade and takes an evening walk by the flower fields again, this time covered with a dark veil of the night. The sound of insects penetrates the darkness, but the breeze and the boy dragging the kite are gone, the fields empty and seemingly untouched like something sacred.
He enters the flower fields himself, making his way through the tall straws and flowers that tickle his collarbone and make him squirm uneasily.
It feels like another place entirely, separated from the road and the trees and the houses further away. The deeper he walks in, the freer he feels, the more his breathing eases and lighter his steps become.
The faint but overwhelming smell of the rapeseed flowers invade his senses and make him lie down out of the sight of every probable random passerby. The sky is a shade of dark midnight blue and the amount of stars visible shake him up a bit at first. It isn't quite the same as in the lit and polluted metropolis of Tokyo. Not even nearly.
What he doesn't know is that just a few metres to his right someone else is lying on the ground too, sharing almost the same vision of the night-sky and feeling tightness in his chest as he remains unmoving to hide his existence successfully.
In the end Jin gets up on his feet and leaves. The soft and tiny petals of the flowers pleasantly brush against his skin as he makes his way through the field and back to the road where he turns around to give the night's last glance at the yellow sea of flowers before he returns home.
He'll come again the next day. He never really was one to listen to other people's opinions and warnings.
--
The next day he heads towards the field, the boy is there again. He walks through the sea of aureolin, tiny flowers and eyes Jin stiffly as he makes his way closer, using his arms to push the flowers out of his way as he tries to catch up with the lone figure still far ahead.
When he does, Kamenashi stands still in front of him, both hands wrapped around the long, white string as he studies the unfamiliar person in front of him warily. Jin tries to smile and greet the boy with an embarrassed smirk but Kamenashi turns his gaze away and starts walking ahead again away from him, ears obviously alerted to follow his next move.
"I'm Jin!" Jin cries out and makes a jolted dash after the other boy. "Akanishi Jin. My grandparents live over that house... right there," he explains and points. Kamenashi stops and turns around to see where Jin's finger is pointing. He nods and offers his hand warily, expression not saying all too much to him except that he probably wasn't all too comfortable having him around.
"Kamenashi Kazuya," the boy says, his voice chiming free from the tenseness and quietness Jin had been expecting to hear. "My home isn't really visible from here."
"Okay," Jin answers with a nod, feeling a bit jumpy but optimistic about the entire situation. "I saw you here yesterday too."
Kamenashi nods and Jin shadows his eyes with his hand as he looks up at the sky to the white kite flying above them, attached to Kame's string. "You have a nice kite."
"It's not really a kite," Kamenashi answers. "I'll show you," he continues and starts rolling the string around his hand, lowering the object towards them. Jin squints his eyes and does finally detect what the object actually is - a couple of sticks with a plain white t-shirt attached to them.
"You're flying a... shirt?" he chuckles and Kamenashi nods, setting the kite off again and loosing the string slowly from around his hand. "You gotta go with what you have if you aren't crafty."
Jin nods in agreement and turns his eyes back to the boy standing beside him, his neck arched back to follow his handmade toy. He keeps swallowing awkwardly and tries to think of something to say, anything to say, since Kamenashi doesn't strike him as much of a talker, nevermind his odd openness about some things like the kite.
"How old are you?" he asks the boy and Kamenashi turns his brown eyes at him, narrowed due to the brightness the flowers only seem to intensify.
"Eighteen," the boy answers. "A long time until I can get away from this place, that is."
Jin nods in sympathy. Kamenashi turns around again and starts walking. He follows the narrow path he makes among the flower field and tightens the knot of the bandana covering his head. Kamenashi wears a cowboy hat that has a string of rainbow-coloured beads on a string surrounding it. Jin chuckles and breaks a couple of short straws with flowers from the field and attaches them to the strings, making Kamenashi wince and budge slightly. A hand rises to examine his handiwork and Kamenashi only looks at him oddly before he continues his way. Jin tries not to feel too awkward about his impulses.
"My family lives in Tokyo," he tells. "We don't really have flower fields or stuff like this there-"
"Do you want to fly the kite?" Kamenashi asks as he turns around and offers the string to him. Jin stares at him stupidly and blinks, taking up the offer and holding the string stupidly, heat flushing to his cheeks.
"I've never really flied one," he mutters, feeling tense all of sudden. "I've only had these small planes that you can pilot with a handheld device but stuff like this is just..."
"City boy," Kamenashi snorts and rolls his eyes. "I wonder how in hell you ended up here in the middle of nowhere."
"It's because my grandparents-" Jin tries to start but Kamenashi's walking again. He tightens his lips and wearily follows the white shirt-kite above them. For some reason it isn't so difficult after all, but that could be because today the wind is sharp and strong, more prepared to carry the heavy object gracefully.
"You don't like it in here?" Jin tries to question as he follows the younger boy. Kamenashi shrugs as an answer and stays silent. It's almost as if the flower field would've swallowed his voice.
They fly the kite until the heat becomes unbearable for Jin and, sweating like a pig, he admits that he isn't able to stay outside for any longer if he doesn't want to start collapsing and throwing up like a pathetic idiot. Kamenashi shrugs as an answer and takes the kite from his hands, staring straight at him silently.
Still, Jin tries to reason, he has enjoyed the boy's company more than his family's, and Reio's probably been alright with the local kids as well. There's only so much time one can spend with one's own kin before being driven crazy.
"I'll come tomorrow too, okay?" he checks with his new acquaintance. Kamenashi answers with a wary nod. It doesn't really seem like he cares much.
Jin follows his promise nevertheless and, within about a week's time, starts calling the younger boy with a nickname Kame due to his slowness as he moves on the fields.
--
Attraction had been the last thing he had expected to feel towards Kame, but that's how things quickly become amidst the summer heat and aureolin rapeseed flower fields. He follows the younger boy like a stupid puppy content by only spending time with the target of his intense admiration.
They lie on the field, covered by the tall flowers and hidden from the outside world. Kame has the string of his shirt-kite tied to a knot around his wrist. The kite oddly circles them and makes fascinating jolts in the sky above them. Or maybe Jin finds them fascinating only because it's Kame he's spending his time with.
"You know, I expected you to be some super silent and shut-off whining kid from the local talk about you," he tells the boy and tries to meet his gaze but fails as it studies the deep blue sky above them, still cloudless. "You're not that bad."
"Okay," Kame answers. There's an odd aura of silent sadness around him as he listens to Jin speaking and it makes him grow worried about the boy.
He rolls on his stomach and starts fiddling with a straw in his hands before putting it in his mouth, just for the feeling of it. Kame's eyes turn to him, and Jin tries to smile, placing his cheek against the dry ground as he faces Kame.
"...Why are you so... uneasy around people?" he tries asking Kame. Kame's eyes falter and his gaze rises to the sky again. Jin tries attracting his attention again by shoving his shoulder gently. "Why the sudden change?"
Kame closes his eyes and breathes deeply in and out, his body relaxed. Jin knows he isn't listening anymore and sighs, sitting up.
Just for the spur of the moment, he bends down to catch Kame's lips for a brief kiss. He's however immediately returned back to reality by a harsh punch in the face that makes him fall over, wailing in pain. Kame's fast on his feet and running, the sound of him moving disappearing somewhere.
"KAME! I WAS JUST JOKING!" he tries bellowing as he gets back on his feet and scans the area for the younger boy, but Kame remains under the surface layer to fool his vision. He doesn't hear the sound of his moving anymore, and when he raises his gaze towards the sky to use the kite as a clue he finds it flying loosely further away. There's a heavy feeling of shame in his chest as the overwhelming desperation takes over him and he starts walking through the field, trying to go somewhere where he recalls Kame disappearing to.
"Kame, I'm serious! I was just joking! Come on! I won't do it again!" he tries yelling with a hoarse voice as he spins around and tries to catch a glimpse of the younger boy. "Kame, come on! Come on..!"
But he has no idea where the boy disappeared to. The flower fields open all around him so far ahead that he isn't able to detect where they start and end, never mind pinpoint a person among the little yellow flowers.
After a couple of hours worth of useless searching, he gives up and leaves. His parents give him strange and worried looks as he snaps at them for asking him where he's been and if he's thirsty and disappears to the shower where he tries to cool himself down and let out at least some of the heart-wrenching misery.
It had all just happened a bit too fast, and as Jin stares in the mirror, he sees a nasty bruise forming on his right cheekbone.
It's such a pain to look at.
--
Kame stops flying the kite that day. Maybe because the original one was now probably lost, that was likely. Jin finds himself missing the younger boy's company to the point of relentless frustration before they run together on the sandy road. Kame has his feet bare and hair pulled back on a ponytail, wary eyes watching him as they get closer, trying to predict his move. He glances around and seems somewhat relieved by a couple of smaller kids playing softball on one large yard.
"Hi," Jin tries to approach the man with a hoarse voice, stopping before him. Kame makes an abrupt stop as well, a sharp look in his eyes as he remains silent. Jin gulps.
"I'm sorry about that time," he tries explaining and Kame passes him like he suddenly would've turned into thin air. His muscles seem strained and his footsteps carry him faster than what Jin's used to. It makes him jog after him desperately and catch his wrist. Kame tries to struggle against his hold and yells so loud Jin can't help but let go.
The look in Kame's eyes is freezing. Jin bites his lip and feels tears swelling in his eyes.
It's too awkward.
"I'm sorry," Jin presses again. "I'm so sorry. I won't do it again, it was stupid. I was just joking."
"But that makes it all the worse, doesn't it?" Kame snaps at him, starting to walk ahead quickly again. "That you did it as a joke. That there's nothing behind it after all, that you just felt like doing something like that. It makes it all the worse."
"Well maybe I like you!" Jin tries to change his approach, catching up with Kame to walk beside him. "But you don't seem too happy about that either!"
"When are you leaving?" Kame asks coldly, eyes avoiding his. Jin swallows harshly, feeling a tight pressure around his chest. He doesn't really want to leave, but things being how they are, maybe it is for the best.
"Two weeks," he answers quietly. "...You want me to go already, don't you?"
"So I'm some summer fun for you?" Kame snaps at him again, stopping and turning to face him properly, arms crossed. "Maybe it's better you don't even try to pursue that. In two weeks you'll be gone again for god knows how many years, maybe for good. I see no point."
Kame's words hit a weak spot and Jin knows that there's truth behind them - starting anything now is absolutely pointless on a long run. He lets his gaze fall to the ground and shifts uncomfortably where he stands.
"You're right," he admits regrettably, clenching his fists. "...I'm sorry. I didn't think."
"You never do," Kame sighs but seems to soften a little. He even pulls him in an awkward and stiff embrace. Jin senses that it's not really what Kame wants, holding him close like that. It's odd how he still does it.
It sadly makes him only want to kiss him again. He feels lost.
Sometimes one just had to let go of things.
"Don't be so distant with people," he complains with a mutter against Kame's shoulder, arms hanging loosely against his sides. "I like you. You used to be liked, you know? Now everyone just avoids talking about you. It's unfair."
Kame lets go of him slowly and Jin squirms in front of him, feeling uneasy about the entire situation. He wonders where the days went when he felt at ease with the young boy rather than extremely bothered.
"My father owns a small inn," Kame suddenly starts chatting nonsense again, his steps slow again like he recalls better. "Downtown. It's not big, there aren't many visitors here, but sometimes the people who own the rapeseed flower fields come here to discuss business with the town people and workers and occasionally there are things like weddings where people from further away come to town and need a place to stay at. Other than that we sell my mother's handiwork. She does clothes and tablecloths and such."
Jin nods, taking in every word, trying to imagine Kame's life. Trying to imagine him standing quietly as he stares at the people around him like he often does, trying to find a peaceful and solitary place for himself to relax at.
"I wish you could take me to the city with you," Kame sighs, opening his arms wide as he walks, gaze directed at the bright sky, nevermind the blindingly blaring sun. "Take me away from here."
Jin stops, eyes staring widely at Kame again. As the younger man ceases hearing the sound of his footsteps on the sandy road, he turns around and looks at him with an apathetic look in his eyes.
Jin realises he's never really seen Kame smile before. Not really.
"I like you," Jin mumbles desperately, trying to see if Kame's words have any sort of confession in them. "I really, honestly, genuinely like you, Kame."
Kame only stands where he is, uneasy and sorrowful. Jin takes a few steps closer and the boy turns his head away. It's a rejection after all.
He grabs the younger boy's hand and starts walking uneasily. They reach the rapeseed flower fields and Kame guides him between the straws. Jin follows, the lost puppy he is, follows and feels himself blooming the same way the tiny flowers do with their soft aureolin petals.
Kame stops somewhere far away from the sandy road and pulls him in a small kiss. Jin feels his heart pounding against his chest and wraps his arms protectively around the younger boy's back, pulling him closer. The kiss is sweet and soft and their eyes are closed, but Jin can still somehow see the flower field surrounding the two of them from every direction.
It's their own world, separated from the isolated little countryside town. Jin feels the two of them blooming as he picks Kame up from the ground and spins him happily.
He doesn't want to remember the fact that he's leaving, that in a matter of days he'll be gone and out of Kame's life just like he's always been. Doesn't want to think of the time they'll be so far apart from each other they're only forced to forget. Let go.
"I remember you from when were kids," Kame whispers against his lips in his arms, his hands resting on Jin's shoulders. "I remember you and your stupid plastic toys that were cooler than my handmade wooden ones, I remember you and your sun-like smile when you played football on a hot summer day into a goal my father had built from sticks."
Jin wonders why he isn't able to remember, but he knows he's been around before. He just knows that there hasn't been anything interesting enough to remember, that the place has always been a goddamn boring hell compared to the city they live in. Now he wishes he would remember, though, because if what Kame's telling him is true then they've met before, they've known each other before the times the winds in Kame's lives changed direction and shut him down from the society.
He rocks Kame gently and kisses him on the lips again.
Their two weeks begin.
--
They build a new kite again. Lying side by side on the bright, yellow flower field, the fly the kite above them and hold each other's hands.
Kame doesn't let him climb over him, though. Kame keeps his distance and refuses to be touched too intimately or having his movements too restricted. If he tries, the younger boy grows unbearably stiff and withdrawn.
"It all happened here on this flower field," Kame talks quietly, his voice breaking the silence of the dark evening. The sound of the insects is loud and makes it difficult to make sense out of his words momentarily.
Jin lies still, his arms crossed behind his head. The shadows feel pleasant in contrast to the afternoon sun. He lies and listens, looking up at the sight of Kame's sitting form, back against him as he stares up at the darkening sky and tears petals off a bundle of flowers he holds in his hands.
"The wind was sharp," Kame whispers even more quietly with a shaking voice that makes Jin grow concerned. He doesn't dare to move though, not when Kame's talking about something that quickly becomes something he feels necessary to listen to. "It was a hot summer day when a man from the inn ran into me on that sandy road, dragged me to these flower fields and took me by force."
"...Huh?" Jin mumbles stupidly, sitting up himself. "Wait, what?"
He sees lonely tears running down Kame's cheeks as his head droops over his shoulders. Kame's eyes don't meet his gaze and his lips are tightly pressed together. Suddenly Jin knows the answer to all of his questions and it knocks the air out of his lungs with a force he never really thought was possible only psychologically.
"...Kame," he whispers and pulls the younger boy into a hug. "Oh fuck. No."
Kame doesn't really welcome his embrace, he doesn't really answer. Still, he isn't pulling away either. Jin holds him under the darkening sky as the younger boy's shaking hands let go of the flowers and lets them fall on the dry ground.
The sound of sobbing is etched to his memory so vividly he doesn't really believe he can ever forget it.
Suddenly he feels an overwhelming need to take Kame far away from the aureolin flower fields, to drag him away from the countryside and grant him the peace of mind he'll never be able to reach in his hometown anymore, no matter how hard he tries.
He breaks into tears as well, holding Kame close so tightly he fears he's hurting him. Kame doesn't object, though.
It's too vulnerable of a moment for each of them.
"The w-wind can always change," Jin sobs quietly in Kame's ear with a broken voice. Kame grips the fabric of his shirt in his fists and buries his face deeper in his shoulder. "T-the wind can always change."
--
Two weeks later Jin's family leaves.
Kame stands on the cobalt yellow flower fields and flies the kite with Jin's old and worn shirt on it as they drive by the fields on the sandy road.
The wind is weak that day.
--
Five years later Jin drives the streets on his way to his grandparents. He squints his eyes as a figure enters his vision from afar, standing on the sandy road under the overwhelmingly radiating heat of the sun with his thumb up, trying to hitch a ride. A field of bright yellow flowers bend in the wind and the boy's hair flutters.
Jin hits the breaks and pulls the window down. The smiling young man approaches him and stares at him from behind his brown-tinted sunglasses.
Realisation dawns him and his smile falters momentarily as his expression turns to confused. Jin gulps, chest feeling tight and heavy.
"...I was kind of hoping for a ride out of this place," Kame mumbles, pointing at his suitcase still on the road. The wind whisks the dry sand off the ground and Kame needs to cover his eyes with a hand to avoid getting its grains in his eyes. "If you're up for it."
"I have a wide bed in my apartment," Jin mumbles stupidly and flushes, slapping his palm over his mouth. Damn it. "I mean, in Tokyo. I have this... this... apartment. You could hang around for a while. I'm now going to my grandparents, though. You know. Some family stuff. Or something. You know."
Kame laughs a bit awkwardly and Jin grins apologetically.
"...So... with a small stop I'll get to my destination?" Kame tries asking him. Jin nods enthusiastically and taps the passenger's seat beside him, heart pounding loudly.
"Yeah. If you can handle my family first, that is."
"Deal," Kame smirks and goes to get his back. He throws it on the backseat before he himself sits on the passenger's seat and slams the door shut, smiling at him awkwardly.
Funny how both of them feel so out of breath after such a short conversation. ...It's the first one they've had in five years.
"Girlfriend? Boyfriend?" Kame asks him quickly. Jin's eyes widen as he stares at Kame, afraid to push on the car pedals and continue their way.
"N-no," he shakes his head, eyes still wide in shock. "Why?"
Kame leans over to kiss him and Jin feels his own fingers burying themselves in Kame's soft locks.
Some things just never die, he assumes. Not even with time.
Kame looks like the happiest person on earth, and Jin swears the spark in his eyes is a million times brighter than the entire flower field reflecting the sun's rays of light.
They laugh with ease and don't start driving for the duration of two blissful hours of aureolin happiness.