[For Dick] email log
[continued from HERE.]
After leaving the club she'd run. Run as fast as she could, as far as she could, before taking the hottest shower she could stand. It didn't make any difference.
So she'd left for the gym before the sun had even come up and she's been there ever since. She can't stop replaying it in her head, over and over and over again. Everything he'd said, everything she'd done. Every single moment when she could have done the right thing. Made the right choice and walked away.
And every time she replays it she's just a little bit more ashamed.
So she hits the bag with every ounce of strength she has. Kicks it. Tries to block out the feel of his mouth on hers, his breath on her skin. She has no idea how she's ever going to face him again. Any of them. And she's never hated the island more than she does at that moment.
Going to see Dinah in the gym after this is a bad idea. He knows it's a bad idea, but he honestly doesn't care. He has to hear from her mouth what the hell she was thinking making out with Kon when he obviously was judgment-impaired. Let alone how she could possibly have thought that making out with Cassie's boyfriend would help relationships already strained to the breaking point. He wants answers.
No. His fists ball at his sides as he stalks in. He doesn't want answers. The truth is, he doesn't care. He doesn't care what she thought - she didn't. She's an adult and Kon's a child and Dick's supposed to be able to lean on her and right now the only leaning he wants to do starts with a kick in the jaw.
He drops into stance behind her, snarls, "Why don't you hit something that can hit back?" then waits for her to spin so he can strike.
Dinah's sweating and panting from the exertion and the need to push herself as hard as she can, but the second she hears Dick enter the room her heart sinks. He's the absolute last person in the world she want to deal with right now. And although she knows his angry words are intended to make her throw the first punch, it's not what she wants. It's not what she wants at all. So she doesn't turn around, doesn't do anything but drop her shoulders and close her eyes.
"Go away, Dick. Please." Her voice is as empty of emotion as she can make it, but she's not even sure she cares what else he hears. She wants to be alone, needs to be alone, because if she can't stop thinking about what she's done she's going to go insane.
"You should've said that to Kon," Dick answers, voice clipped. If she thinks she's getting out of this conversation by keeping her back to him, she can think again. This will happen, because if it doesn't happen, she can find somewhere else to live.
"Come on, Canary. Time to play with the grown-ups now." The sneering, the almost eager bounce on the balls of his feet, the irritation in his eyes should be warning. He's pissed, but more than that, he's making a point. Dinah knows better than to come at him when he's like this, so where was that judgment with Kon?
"I did," she replies, still not turning around. "But apparently he doesn't listen any better than you do."
Dinah knows this isn't just going to disappear. Dick isn't just going to walk away and forget any of it. And at this point she knows he's not going to walk away at all. So, she has no other choice but to turn around and face him. Face all of it.
"You came here to teach me a lesson? Then go ahead, Dick." Her eyes are full of self-loathing, but it's more than that. She's as angry as he is - angry at herself and the Island and Kon and her whole stupid fucking life. "Hit me. Bloody me. Do it, if that will make you feel better. Because there's nothing I can do and nothing I can say to change what happened and I don't know what else to do. So go ahead."
She steps closer to him, voice low but overflowing with emotion. "Do it."
"Hard to hear when you're a teenaged boy with the hottest blonde on the island's tongue down your throat." His eyes go dark, cold, Battish, none of their normal life in them, no hint of the ebullient smile or the Robin-warmth. In his life, he has only felt this a few times. When he found out about Roy working for Bruce, when they learned Jason was Red Hood, when he finally faced down Catalina. And he would hit her, he would pummel her with his fists and feet until she couldn't stand--
Except that she won't hit back. She's offering herself as a punching bag and he's not that guy. He will never be that guy. "Screw you, Dinah. You want to punish yourself, find somewhere other than the ends of my fists to do it. You might be acting like a sixteen year-old girl skipping curfews and riding bikes with the bad boys but I'm not your father and I'm sure as hell not going to spank you so you can feel like you've done your time."
"Then why did you come here," she asks, not backing away. "Of course you came here to punish me. Punish me for being weak and pathetic enough that I let a child manipulate me. Punish me for every stupid, fucking thoughtless thing I've done since I got here. For hurting Barbara, hurting everyone around me because I'm not her."
She's getting louder with every word, until she's almost screaming at him. Shaking so hard she can barely keep her voice steady. But this is the truth, and if he won't hit her, won't hurt her, then she'll do it herself. "I'm. Not. Her. Don't you get it yet, Dick? I'll never be her. I'm just some woman wearing her face and that's all I'll ever be."
Maybe he does want to punish her, but he's not going to beat her up so she can forgive herself. Like Amy told him, "you've got to do a lot more to earn your redemption than sit on your ass in jail."
Dick gives her the most contemptuous look he can muster and picks imaginary lint off his jeans. "Yeah, I think you made that pretty damned clear with Kon." She acts like no one gets it, like no one cares that she's not their Dinah and they want her to be. And Kon's the good guy, the one she can trust because he didn't know her and he doesn't care. "Newsflash, Dinah. I knew you weren't her the first night you got here and I still don't care."
Temper usually kept tightly under wraps flares out hard. He brushes his hair out of his face with an impatient look. "You're Dinah. Even if you're not the person who saved Babs with me or walked in on me in her shower, you're family. We've gone out of our way to accept that you're someone different and get on with our lives with you. You? At every single possible turn, you throw it back in our faces. Demand we see it. Fine, you want to talk about how you're different, you tell me: why'd you do it, Dinah? What could possibly have been so important to a mature, seasoned hero that she had to steal a sixteen year-old girl's first love for the night?"
"Nothing. Not a god damned thing." She's so angry she can barely think straight and she's not sure who it is she's angrier at. Maybe he's right and she's brought all this down on herself, but he's fooling himself if he thinks anyone has gone out of their way to accept her. Particularly him. "You think you've accepted me, Dick? Honestly?! All you've done is filled in the blank you've turned me into with someone else's life story. A constant reminder of all the things I haven't done and haven't seen, constantly trying to remind me how grateful I should be that you're allowing me to step into the life of my better copy."
She looks away from him then, unable to contain what she's feeling anymore, needing to strike out but refusing to give him the satisfaction. So she screams as loud as she can and punches the bag once last time with every ounce of strength left in her body. "Fuck. I fucked up. That's it. That's all there is to it. Whatever happened to Kon he could see it. See every weakness in me, every need and he just twisted the knife. Is that what you want to hear? What do you want to hear? Just tell me. Whatever you want, I'll give it to you. I can't live like this. I can't live with this."
His jaw clenches and ticks, fists bunching at his sides and feet tensing against the ground in readiness to spring, but there's nowhere to go and no one to fight but their histories. "We're all addicted to our pasts. They don't go away. If loving you like I know you because you look like someone I love is a burden, I can stop any time now." Which is a lie and anyone who knows him knows it, but if it gets the point across and keeps his fists off her pretty face, he'll tell it.
"What do I want from you?" He exhales, forcing his shoulders to relax and his body to settle. "That's a good start. Face up to it. Understand it. Make it right. Don't do it again." He levels her with the kind of look he learned from Bruce back when he remembered love wasn't that kind of a four-letter word. Disappointment and faith twinned. She screwed up, but he believes in her. "Stop feeling sorry for yourself and start thinking about the people you hurt."
Her eyes are shining with unshed tears as she listens to him. Not moving, not saying a word. She knows he's right. At least partly. She's been so unbelievably selfish since she'd arrived and she knows it. Not just with Kon, but with Monet, with everyone she's met. So absorbed by her own bullshit that she hasn't once stopped to think about how it's affecting the rest of them. What they're suffering. What they've had to leave behind. Just one more thing to add to the list of reasons why she's utterly disgusted with herself.
"I can't promise you anything," she says finally. Voice quiet but clear. "I can't promise I won't keep fucking up because I don't think I even know who I am anymore. But I can promise you I'll try. And that I would do anything to make this right. And if you don't believe a single other thing that comes out of my mouth, I hope you believe that. I am so, so sorry. Sorry that I hurt Cassie, sorry that I let you down, sorry that I'm making such a mess of everything. You tell me how I can fix this and I'll do it. I'll do anything you ask."
"Stop looking for me to give you the answers, Di." Tension bleeds away and he sighs, reaching up to rub both eyes with his hands. "This isn't you. This begging for forgiveness and begging for help and looking to someone else to give you answers. It's not any version of you, and we both know that."
For the first time in, oh, ten minutes maybe, he doesn't know what to do. The truth is, Dinah's as much a mess as Cassie is and maybe needs him more. Inhaling slowly, then letting it out to force the rest of the tension away, he comes back milder. "You screwed up. It doesn't have to be the end of the world, and I know you've met me, so you know I'm not going to let you give up until you fix it."
She can feel the heat of shame from her toes to the tips of her ears and she'd give anything for this entire night to never have happened. For her to just close her eyes and wake up back in her own life, back in her bed in the Watchtower. Back where she's respected and where she knows where she belongs and what that means. Not here in this ridiculous...nothing place where their entire lives, their whole reason for being is completely pointless. But she knows none of that is going to happen and wishing for a thing never makes it true. She also knows he's right. She's better than this. Wildcat saw something in her, the League saw something in her, she just...she needs to remember what that was.
But he's also wrong, in a way. She's always looked to other people to give her answers. She's always had someone to lead her and she has no one now. No one but him, even if she's not sure she's ready to give him that responsibility. "I don't know how, Dick. I don't even know where to start. You're telling me to fix things here, but...I honestly have no idea where to begin. If I go to Cassie now I'd only be doing it to make myself feel better and that's not fair to her. She needs time to hate me. To blame me. I'm not begging you, I'm asking you to please tell me what you think I should do."
Something in him shifts when she asks and it shows in his eyes. Maybe they're finally done fighting over whether she's going to accept his leadership. For months, it's been like Roy all over again. He moves forward into her and sets his hand, not clenched anymore but open, kind, on her shoulder. "She's a Wonder, not a Bat. She needs you to be sorry you hurt her so she can get in your face and tell you what she thinks of you. The sooner you let her do that, the sooner that's going to heal." One thing at a time. She's got Kon and Tim to apologize to also, but that's a different problem.
She flinches automatically at his touch, but forces herself to relax when she can see it's not meant as an attack. It's almost as if he's letting his anger at her go, but she doesn't want to assume she could be that lucky. Or that she deserves his affection. Not now. Maybe not ever. But at least he's giving her the direction she'd asked for and that's more than she thinks she had any right to.
"Ok," she says with a nod. "I understand. I'll try and find her. See if she'll even let me near her."
Dinah wants to ask him the question that's been in the back of her mind since he'd shown up at the gym, but she's scared to hear the answer. Even now, with him no longer looking like he wants to kick the absolute crap out of her. But she needs to know so she forces herself to look him in the eye. "You're not going to...can I still stay in the Treehouse?"
"Cassie's a kid and she's having a lot of problems adjusting to the changes in her world." Dick gives her another one of those meaningful 'there's a message for you here' looks, but his hand stays curled on her shoulder, thumb rubbing a small circle over the collarbone. He needs to talk to Cassie, too, but since he didn't do anything to her, he's been trying to let her breathe. Sometimes the last thing you want is big brother to be rational about your boyfriend trying to sleep with your best friend, your sister, and your other best friend's mentor. "Remember that she's probably not interested in your problems, and even if she is, you can't put them on her."
It isn't that he didn't hear the question or didn't think it was important, and it's not that it's conditional on good behavior. Dinah needs to remember how to put everyone else first and that's the point here. But now that he's made it, he meets her gaze, solid, calm, and sure. "You were never a Titan, so I'll forgive you for asking that question. And since you weren't, I'll spell it out for you. My Titans aren't the JLA. We made promises not just to the world but to each other. To be there for each other, no matter what. I'll kick your pretty ass when you need it, and I'll forgive you when you ask for it, and home is home. You don't get to move out because you made a mistake. It's going to take a lot more than moving to the other side of the island to get yourself out of this mess. You're going to have to earn it." But everything in his posture and his tone say he'll be there, every single step of the way.
Deciding to deal with the less emotional bits first, she says, "I know, Dick. I do. It's why I didn't go to her immediately. She needs to be pissed at me and hate me and blame and me and I deserve all of that. I didn't want to force her to deal with me before she's ready. I don't really know her, so I'll take your word on what's best for her."
As for the rest of it...she can't hold his gaze and she wishes she could move away from his touch without it seeming like a rejection. But it's too much. She's not a Titan and she doesn't think she wants to be. He can say what he likes about the League, but that's her home and she can't imagine it ever not being. After everything she'd done to gain acceptance, she can't turn her back on that no matter what's happened. No matter what twisted alternate universe she's landed herself in. Dinah also knows she can't say that. Not to Dick. Not now. Not when he's offering her a place, or at least some kind of forgiveness. So she takes his words for what they are and tries not to get too wrapped up in the rest of it. All she wants is to know she still has somewhere to go home to and he's giving her that. Promising her that he'll give her a chance to at least try and fix this. To try and stop fucking up.
She pulls her gaze back to his and refuses to let herself look away again. "Thank you."
"She needs to be pissed in your face," he reiterates, because getting to yell and scream while you're still mad enough to do it, is the Wonder way. Or maybe it's the everybody-but-Bats-and-Birds way. Whatever way it is, it's the right way for Cassie for now. "Even if it's only to tell you to get lost." And he's known the other Dinah long enough to recognize a silent mutiny, so maybe they're not quite over the whole issue of team. Maybe that's okay because by the time she gets around to wanting to be on it, there may not be one left. The thought hurts, in a deep deep way - a Bat and Robin way of hidden failures, hoped-for successes never shared and grieved in private. "As for the rest, you're welcome." There's nothing else he can say, and any more words on the subject will just get in the...way.
After leaving the club she'd run. Run as fast as she could, as far as she could, before taking the hottest shower she could stand. It didn't make any difference.
So she'd left for the gym before the sun had even come up and she's been there ever since. She can't stop replaying it in her head, over and over and over again. Everything he'd said, everything she'd done. Every single moment when she could have done the right thing. Made the right choice and walked away.
And every time she replays it she's just a little bit more ashamed.
So she hits the bag with every ounce of strength she has. Kicks it. Tries to block out the feel of his mouth on hers, his breath on her skin. She has no idea how she's ever going to face him again. Any of them. And she's never hated the island more than she does at that moment.
Going to see Dinah in the gym after this is a bad idea. He knows it's a bad idea, but he honestly doesn't care. He has to hear from her mouth what the hell she was thinking making out with Kon when he obviously was judgment-impaired. Let alone how she could possibly have thought that making out with Cassie's boyfriend would help relationships already strained to the breaking point. He wants answers.
No. His fists ball at his sides as he stalks in. He doesn't want answers. The truth is, he doesn't care. He doesn't care what she thought - she didn't. She's an adult and Kon's a child and Dick's supposed to be able to lean on her and right now the only leaning he wants to do starts with a kick in the jaw.
He drops into stance behind her, snarls, "Why don't you hit something that can hit back?" then waits for her to spin so he can strike.
Dinah's sweating and panting from the exertion and the need to push herself as hard as she can, but the second she hears Dick enter the room her heart sinks. He's the absolute last person in the world she want to deal with right now. And although she knows his angry words are intended to make her throw the first punch, it's not what she wants. It's not what she wants at all. So she doesn't turn around, doesn't do anything but drop her shoulders and close her eyes.
"Go away, Dick. Please." Her voice is as empty of emotion as she can make it, but she's not even sure she cares what else he hears. She wants to be alone, needs to be alone, because if she can't stop thinking about what she's done she's going to go insane.
"You should've said that to Kon," Dick answers, voice clipped. If she thinks she's getting out of this conversation by keeping her back to him, she can think again. This will happen, because if it doesn't happen, she can find somewhere else to live.
"Come on, Canary. Time to play with the grown-ups now." The sneering, the almost eager bounce on the balls of his feet, the irritation in his eyes should be warning. He's pissed, but more than that, he's making a point. Dinah knows better than to come at him when he's like this, so where was that judgment with Kon?
"I did," she replies, still not turning around. "But apparently he doesn't listen any better than you do."
Dinah knows this isn't just going to disappear. Dick isn't just going to walk away and forget any of it. And at this point she knows he's not going to walk away at all. So, she has no other choice but to turn around and face him. Face all of it.
"You came here to teach me a lesson? Then go ahead, Dick." Her eyes are full of self-loathing, but it's more than that. She's as angry as he is - angry at herself and the Island and Kon and her whole stupid fucking life. "Hit me. Bloody me. Do it, if that will make you feel better. Because there's nothing I can do and nothing I can say to change what happened and I don't know what else to do. So go ahead."
She steps closer to him, voice low but overflowing with emotion. "Do it."
"Hard to hear when you're a teenaged boy with the hottest blonde on the island's tongue down your throat." His eyes go dark, cold, Battish, none of their normal life in them, no hint of the ebullient smile or the Robin-warmth. In his life, he has only felt this a few times. When he found out about Roy working for Bruce, when they learned Jason was Red Hood, when he finally faced down Catalina. And he would hit her, he would pummel her with his fists and feet until she couldn't stand--
Except that she won't hit back. She's offering herself as a punching bag and he's not that guy. He will never be that guy. "Screw you, Dinah. You want to punish yourself, find somewhere other than the ends of my fists to do it. You might be acting like a sixteen year-old girl skipping curfews and riding bikes with the bad boys but I'm not your father and I'm sure as hell not going to spank you so you can feel like you've done your time."
"Then why did you come here," she asks, not backing away. "Of course you came here to punish me. Punish me for being weak and pathetic enough that I let a child manipulate me. Punish me for every stupid, fucking thoughtless thing I've done since I got here. For hurting Barbara, hurting everyone around me because I'm not her."
She's getting louder with every word, until she's almost screaming at him. Shaking so hard she can barely keep her voice steady. But this is the truth, and if he won't hit her, won't hurt her, then she'll do it herself. "I'm. Not. Her. Don't you get it yet, Dick? I'll never be her. I'm just some woman wearing her face and that's all I'll ever be."
Maybe he does want to punish her, but he's not going to beat her up so she can forgive herself. Like Amy told him, "you've got to do a lot more to earn your redemption than sit on your ass in jail."
Dick gives her the most contemptuous look he can muster and picks imaginary lint off his jeans. "Yeah, I think you made that pretty damned clear with Kon." She acts like no one gets it, like no one cares that she's not their Dinah and they want her to be. And Kon's the good guy, the one she can trust because he didn't know her and he doesn't care. "Newsflash, Dinah. I knew you weren't her the first night you got here and I still don't care."
Temper usually kept tightly under wraps flares out hard. He brushes his hair out of his face with an impatient look. "You're Dinah. Even if you're not the person who saved Babs with me or walked in on me in her shower, you're family. We've gone out of our way to accept that you're someone different and get on with our lives with you. You? At every single possible turn, you throw it back in our faces. Demand we see it. Fine, you want to talk about how you're different, you tell me: why'd you do it, Dinah? What could possibly have been so important to a mature, seasoned hero that she had to steal a sixteen year-old girl's first love for the night?"
"Nothing. Not a god damned thing." She's so angry she can barely think straight and she's not sure who it is she's angrier at. Maybe he's right and she's brought all this down on herself, but he's fooling himself if he thinks anyone has gone out of their way to accept her. Particularly him. "You think you've accepted me, Dick? Honestly?! All you've done is filled in the blank you've turned me into with someone else's life story. A constant reminder of all the things I haven't done and haven't seen, constantly trying to remind me how grateful I should be that you're allowing me to step into the life of my better copy."
She looks away from him then, unable to contain what she's feeling anymore, needing to strike out but refusing to give him the satisfaction. So she screams as loud as she can and punches the bag once last time with every ounce of strength left in her body. "Fuck. I fucked up. That's it. That's all there is to it. Whatever happened to Kon he could see it. See every weakness in me, every need and he just twisted the knife. Is that what you want to hear? What do you want to hear? Just tell me. Whatever you want, I'll give it to you. I can't live like this. I can't live with this."
His jaw clenches and ticks, fists bunching at his sides and feet tensing against the ground in readiness to spring, but there's nowhere to go and no one to fight but their histories. "We're all addicted to our pasts. They don't go away. If loving you like I know you because you look like someone I love is a burden, I can stop any time now." Which is a lie and anyone who knows him knows it, but if it gets the point across and keeps his fists off her pretty face, he'll tell it.
"What do I want from you?" He exhales, forcing his shoulders to relax and his body to settle. "That's a good start. Face up to it. Understand it. Make it right. Don't do it again." He levels her with the kind of look he learned from Bruce back when he remembered love wasn't that kind of a four-letter word. Disappointment and faith twinned. She screwed up, but he believes in her. "Stop feeling sorry for yourself and start thinking about the people you hurt."
Her eyes are shining with unshed tears as she listens to him. Not moving, not saying a word. She knows he's right. At least partly. She's been so unbelievably selfish since she'd arrived and she knows it. Not just with Kon, but with Monet, with everyone she's met. So absorbed by her own bullshit that she hasn't once stopped to think about how it's affecting the rest of them. What they're suffering. What they've had to leave behind. Just one more thing to add to the list of reasons why she's utterly disgusted with herself.
"I can't promise you anything," she says finally. Voice quiet but clear. "I can't promise I won't keep fucking up because I don't think I even know who I am anymore. But I can promise you I'll try. And that I would do anything to make this right. And if you don't believe a single other thing that comes out of my mouth, I hope you believe that. I am so, so sorry. Sorry that I hurt Cassie, sorry that I let you down, sorry that I'm making such a mess of everything. You tell me how I can fix this and I'll do it. I'll do anything you ask."
"Stop looking for me to give you the answers, Di." Tension bleeds away and he sighs, reaching up to rub both eyes with his hands. "This isn't you. This begging for forgiveness and begging for help and looking to someone else to give you answers. It's not any version of you, and we both know that."
For the first time in, oh, ten minutes maybe, he doesn't know what to do. The truth is, Dinah's as much a mess as Cassie is and maybe needs him more. Inhaling slowly, then letting it out to force the rest of the tension away, he comes back milder. "You screwed up. It doesn't have to be the end of the world, and I know you've met me, so you know I'm not going to let you give up until you fix it."
She can feel the heat of shame from her toes to the tips of her ears and she'd give anything for this entire night to never have happened. For her to just close her eyes and wake up back in her own life, back in her bed in the Watchtower. Back where she's respected and where she knows where she belongs and what that means. Not here in this ridiculous...nothing place where their entire lives, their whole reason for being is completely pointless. But she knows none of that is going to happen and wishing for a thing never makes it true. She also knows he's right. She's better than this. Wildcat saw something in her, the League saw something in her, she just...she needs to remember what that was.
But he's also wrong, in a way. She's always looked to other people to give her answers. She's always had someone to lead her and she has no one now. No one but him, even if she's not sure she's ready to give him that responsibility. "I don't know how, Dick. I don't even know where to start. You're telling me to fix things here, but...I honestly have no idea where to begin. If I go to Cassie now I'd only be doing it to make myself feel better and that's not fair to her. She needs time to hate me. To blame me. I'm not begging you, I'm asking you to please tell me what you think I should do."
Something in him shifts when she asks and it shows in his eyes. Maybe they're finally done fighting over whether she's going to accept his leadership. For months, it's been like Roy all over again. He moves forward into her and sets his hand, not clenched anymore but open, kind, on her shoulder. "She's a Wonder, not a Bat. She needs you to be sorry you hurt her so she can get in your face and tell you what she thinks of you. The sooner you let her do that, the sooner that's going to heal." One thing at a time. She's got Kon and Tim to apologize to also, but that's a different problem.
She flinches automatically at his touch, but forces herself to relax when she can see it's not meant as an attack. It's almost as if he's letting his anger at her go, but she doesn't want to assume she could be that lucky. Or that she deserves his affection. Not now. Maybe not ever. But at least he's giving her the direction she'd asked for and that's more than she thinks she had any right to.
"Ok," she says with a nod. "I understand. I'll try and find her. See if she'll even let me near her."
Dinah wants to ask him the question that's been in the back of her mind since he'd shown up at the gym, but she's scared to hear the answer. Even now, with him no longer looking like he wants to kick the absolute crap out of her. But she needs to know so she forces herself to look him in the eye. "You're not going to...can I still stay in the Treehouse?"
"Cassie's a kid and she's having a lot of problems adjusting to the changes in her world." Dick gives her another one of those meaningful 'there's a message for you here' looks, but his hand stays curled on her shoulder, thumb rubbing a small circle over the collarbone. He needs to talk to Cassie, too, but since he didn't do anything to her, he's been trying to let her breathe. Sometimes the last thing you want is big brother to be rational about your boyfriend trying to sleep with your best friend, your sister, and your other best friend's mentor. "Remember that she's probably not interested in your problems, and even if she is, you can't put them on her."
It isn't that he didn't hear the question or didn't think it was important, and it's not that it's conditional on good behavior. Dinah needs to remember how to put everyone else first and that's the point here. But now that he's made it, he meets her gaze, solid, calm, and sure. "You were never a Titan, so I'll forgive you for asking that question. And since you weren't, I'll spell it out for you. My Titans aren't the JLA. We made promises not just to the world but to each other. To be there for each other, no matter what. I'll kick your pretty ass when you need it, and I'll forgive you when you ask for it, and home is home. You don't get to move out because you made a mistake. It's going to take a lot more than moving to the other side of the island to get yourself out of this mess. You're going to have to earn it." But everything in his posture and his tone say he'll be there, every single step of the way.
Deciding to deal with the less emotional bits first, she says, "I know, Dick. I do. It's why I didn't go to her immediately. She needs to be pissed at me and hate me and blame and me and I deserve all of that. I didn't want to force her to deal with me before she's ready. I don't really know her, so I'll take your word on what's best for her."
As for the rest of it...she can't hold his gaze and she wishes she could move away from his touch without it seeming like a rejection. But it's too much. She's not a Titan and she doesn't think she wants to be. He can say what he likes about the League, but that's her home and she can't imagine it ever not being. After everything she'd done to gain acceptance, she can't turn her back on that no matter what's happened. No matter what twisted alternate universe she's landed herself in. Dinah also knows she can't say that. Not to Dick. Not now. Not when he's offering her a place, or at least some kind of forgiveness. So she takes his words for what they are and tries not to get too wrapped up in the rest of it. All she wants is to know she still has somewhere to go home to and he's giving her that. Promising her that he'll give her a chance to at least try and fix this. To try and stop fucking up.
She pulls her gaze back to his and refuses to let herself look away again. "Thank you."
"She needs to be pissed in your face," he reiterates, because getting to yell and scream while you're still mad enough to do it, is the Wonder way. Or maybe it's the everybody-but-Bats-and-Birds way. Whatever way it is, it's the right way for Cassie for now. "Even if it's only to tell you to get lost." And he's known the other Dinah long enough to recognize a silent mutiny, so maybe they're not quite over the whole issue of team. Maybe that's okay because by the time she gets around to wanting to be on it, there may not be one left. The thought hurts, in a deep deep way - a Bat and Robin way of hidden failures, hoped-for successes never shared and grieved in private. "As for the rest, you're welcome." There's nothing else he can say, and any more words on the subject will just get in the...way.