(Untitled)

[pottersues]

Here is day eleven. Time for Ravenclaw.

TITLE: Marching Band Harry Potter
PERPETRATOR: Ravenclaw4Life
SUE-O-METER:

Comments

[anonymous]

Holy heck... If you're going to write about something as dull as a freaking high school marching band, you might as well try to make it a little interesting somehow (we don't need to know what position EACH and EVERY person plays within ONE SENTENCE... that's what storytelling is for. You TELL the readers through your STORY... not depend everything on narrative, my goodness). Perhaps if she had tried to incorporate the story into the dialogue a little more, it wouldn't be so mind-numbingly boring.

P.S: if someone somehow falls for Draco, I would just like to point out how he has absolutely no personality (according to the description), like at ALL. How would anyone find him interesting or attractive in any way?

[yemi_hikari]

Nobody has any kind of personality in this story. They're falling for each other because their peas in a pod. :P

[darth_gojira]

I wouldn't be so hard on self-insertions if they weren't so annoying and pointless