1054: Seasons of Love - Hermione Granger
Random summary found while cruising for Sues: "Can soul mates ever be separated, and if they are, what would happen? Can people truly change age old perceptions of themselves? Can love blossom with emnity? What does this have to do with Draco Malfoy and Ginny Weasley?" GOD, I HAVE NO IDEA. PLEASE, END THE SUSPENSE.
But pottersues, you say, that looks pretty bad. Why are you not mocking that one?
Why, dear minions, because I found this:
After Dumbledore's death the students of hogwarts come back to school changed. Will Hermione's production of RENT help the students come to terms with what is going on around them and help them face the future?
DEAR. SWEET. JESUS.
TITLE: Seasons of Love
PERPETRATOR: gordo-girl
SUE-O-METER:
(toxic)
FULL NAME: Hermione Granger. She's going to be the Sue, simply because she's so OOC, and a walking advertisment for Rent.
SPECIES: Renthead.
HAIR: "curly light brown hair that fell to her mid-back." Can we have a moratorium on "fell to mid-back" or whatnot and just say "long"? And then later! "Her once super curly hair was straitened and styled differently, and her wardrobe updated. She looked really good..."
EYES: Not described.
MARKINGS: She probably has "NO DAY BUT TODAY" tattooed on her lower back or something. But I'm just guessing.
POSSESSIONS: Rent DVD, Rent bootleg DVDs, Rent OBC, Rent program, Rent libretto, Rent film soundtrack (both highlights and complete 2-disc edition)...of course, I'm just guessing. And maybe a tiny closet shrine.
ORIGIN: Middle-school drama club?
CONNECTIONS TO CANON: I think Hermione got paid off by the producers of the RENT movie to do some extra advertising.
SPECIAL ABILITIES: Just wait until the audition chapter. Juuust wait.
NOTES: OF COURSE. OF COURSE LUNA SINGS "MEMORY" FOR HER AUDITION. OF COURSE. AND OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD. DRACO SINGS 'BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY.' OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD.
I CANNOT just post a tiny bit of this. There are three samples below the cut.
And the worst thing is that I went to her profile, and really, I don't think she's a troll.
SAMPLE:
“This is so ridiculous! We can’t even go outside anymore! It’s like everyone thinks that Snapes going to jump out from behind a tree and kill us all!”
“I know it’s hard to believe Harry, but that’s probably what they do think. Ever since Dumbledore died, everything has changed.” Hermione said.
“And”, Harry said, “I can’t believe that they are making us go back to school! After all that has happened, and all that has to be done.”
“I know Harry” Hermione said in a quiet voice, “It’s not something that we can avoid.”
“But it might be something we can improve upon.” Ron said from where he was standing by the window.
“What do you mean?” Harry said his brow furrowed.
“I don’t know, but maybe we can come up with something that will keep our minds off of all this… stuff.” He threw his hands up in frustration. Harry nodded in agreement.
“I’ve got it!” Hermione said jumping to her feet. Harry and Ron looked at her with wide eyes. “A musical! We should do a musical!”
Ron looked at her completely confused, “What!”
“A musical. You know a play where they sing. My mum and dad used to take me to them all the time when I was little.”
“It might be a good idea.” Harry said to Hermione “, but if we do something like that lets make sure that we do one that’s not too, well, cheesy.”
“I have one that’s not cheesy at all!” Hermione went to her bag and pulled out a book, “RENT!”
“What’s that?” Ron said
“I think I heard about that one”, Harry said nodding and standing up. “It’s that one that has that ‘Seasons of Love’ song in it”
“Yeah” Hermione said, “It’s really a amazing show. It deals with HIV, poverty, loss, love, and so much more!”
“Sounds cool.” Ron said, “ We should do it.”
Just then Ginny came in.
“Hey, guys. What’s going on?”
“Ginny” Hermione said, “we hade an idea.”
As Harry, Ron and Hermione told Ginny about their idea her face lit up.
“We have to do that! If there’s one thing Hogwarts needs is a opportunity to express themselves.”
“So” Harry said, “it’s decided. Hogwarts is going to do a musical.”
And more!
Outside the door Draco stopped in his tracks. ‘Hogwarts was doing RENT?’ He thought, ‘Maybe this wouldn’t be a bad year after all!’
And again!
“I just wanted to thank you four for coming up with this idea. I think that Dumbledore would have really loved this, and that is why I have decided to let you four be the first to see a new addition to the castle. Come fallow me.” She stood up and headed to the large door, the group followed closely behind her wondering what awaited them. They hadn’t walked far when McGonagall stepped stopped at a door that none of them had see before. The door was made from a deep red wood that shine like it had flecks of gold in it. McGonagall smiled and opened the door and the kids looked in with amazement. Inside was a real theater with rows and rows of plush red seats and a huge stage with balconies over looking it.
“welcome” McGonagall said softly, “to the Albus Dumbledore Theater.”
The four teenagers looked at her in shock.
“you mean”, Ron said, “this is for us!”
“No.” Hermione said, “It’s for him.”
*howls with laughter*
But pottersues, you say, that looks pretty bad. Why are you not mocking that one?
Why, dear minions, because I found this:
After Dumbledore's death the students of hogwarts come back to school changed. Will Hermione's production of RENT help the students come to terms with what is going on around them and help them face the future?
DEAR. SWEET. JESUS.
TITLE: Seasons of Love
PERPETRATOR: gordo-girl
SUE-O-METER:
(toxic)
FULL NAME: Hermione Granger. She's going to be the Sue, simply because she's so OOC, and a walking advertisment for Rent.
SPECIES: Renthead.
HAIR: "curly light brown hair that fell to her mid-back." Can we have a moratorium on "fell to mid-back" or whatnot and just say "long"? And then later! "Her once super curly hair was straitened and styled differently, and her wardrobe updated. She looked really good..."
EYES: Not described.
MARKINGS: She probably has "NO DAY BUT TODAY" tattooed on her lower back or something. But I'm just guessing.
POSSESSIONS: Rent DVD, Rent bootleg DVDs, Rent OBC, Rent program, Rent libretto, Rent film soundtrack (both highlights and complete 2-disc edition)...of course, I'm just guessing. And maybe a tiny closet shrine.
ORIGIN: Middle-school drama club?
CONNECTIONS TO CANON: I think Hermione got paid off by the producers of the RENT movie to do some extra advertising.
SPECIAL ABILITIES: Just wait until the audition chapter. Juuust wait.
NOTES: OF COURSE. OF COURSE LUNA SINGS "MEMORY" FOR HER AUDITION. OF COURSE. AND OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD. DRACO SINGS 'BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY.' OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD.
I CANNOT just post a tiny bit of this. There are three samples below the cut.
And the worst thing is that I went to her profile, and really, I don't think she's a troll.
SAMPLE:
“This is so ridiculous! We can’t even go outside anymore! It’s like everyone thinks that Snapes going to jump out from behind a tree and kill us all!”
“I know it’s hard to believe Harry, but that’s probably what they do think. Ever since Dumbledore died, everything has changed.” Hermione said.
“And”, Harry said, “I can’t believe that they are making us go back to school! After all that has happened, and all that has to be done.”
“I know Harry” Hermione said in a quiet voice, “It’s not something that we can avoid.”
“But it might be something we can improve upon.” Ron said from where he was standing by the window.
“What do you mean?” Harry said his brow furrowed.
“I don’t know, but maybe we can come up with something that will keep our minds off of all this… stuff.” He threw his hands up in frustration. Harry nodded in agreement.
“I’ve got it!” Hermione said jumping to her feet. Harry and Ron looked at her with wide eyes. “A musical! We should do a musical!”
Ron looked at her completely confused, “What!”
“A musical. You know a play where they sing. My mum and dad used to take me to them all the time when I was little.”
“It might be a good idea.” Harry said to Hermione “, but if we do something like that lets make sure that we do one that’s not too, well, cheesy.”
“I have one that’s not cheesy at all!” Hermione went to her bag and pulled out a book, “RENT!”
“What’s that?” Ron said
“I think I heard about that one”, Harry said nodding and standing up. “It’s that one that has that ‘Seasons of Love’ song in it”
“Yeah” Hermione said, “It’s really a amazing show. It deals with HIV, poverty, loss, love, and so much more!”
“Sounds cool.” Ron said, “ We should do it.”
Just then Ginny came in.
“Hey, guys. What’s going on?”
“Ginny” Hermione said, “we hade an idea.”
As Harry, Ron and Hermione told Ginny about their idea her face lit up.
“We have to do that! If there’s one thing Hogwarts needs is a opportunity to express themselves.”
“So” Harry said, “it’s decided. Hogwarts is going to do a musical.”
And more!
Outside the door Draco stopped in his tracks. ‘Hogwarts was doing RENT?’ He thought, ‘Maybe this wouldn’t be a bad year after all!’
And again!
“I just wanted to thank you four for coming up with this idea. I think that Dumbledore would have really loved this, and that is why I have decided to let you four be the first to see a new addition to the castle. Come fallow me.” She stood up and headed to the large door, the group followed closely behind her wondering what awaited them. They hadn’t walked far when McGonagall stepped stopped at a door that none of them had see before. The door was made from a deep red wood that shine like it had flecks of gold in it. McGonagall smiled and opened the door and the kids looked in with amazement. Inside was a real theater with rows and rows of plush red seats and a huge stage with balconies over looking it.
“welcome” McGonagall said softly, “to the Albus Dumbledore Theater.”
The four teenagers looked at her in shock.
“you mean”, Ron said, “this is for us!”
“No.” Hermione said, “It’s for him.”
*howls with laughter*