White Flag (8/?)
Later Brooke popped the disc in the DVD player. It was the game; Sam had taped it. She watched as Cara bounced onto the field happily, doing cartwheels and toe touches. She was really good. When she’d first talked about joining, she and Brooke had spent the entire weekend going over routines. Brooke had given her a lot of pointers, patiently walking her through the steps, and even succeeded in teaching Cara a backhand spring. After auditions, Cara had called her and bragged that she was the only one that could do one. She watched Cara go through a few cheers, and she was proud, so proud she was afraid her chest would explode. But then she saw it. It was halftime, which meant the girls would do a big routine, and again Cara’s gaze scanned the audience. When she realized Brooke wasn’t there, the light in her eyes dulled, and her smile faltered for a moment, before she shook it off and plastered a fake one its place.
From that point on every time Sam would do a close up on the young girl’s face, she captured Cara’s sadness, hurt and disappointment. Every time Brooke had to watch it, she felt like she was being stabbed in the chest. She had done that. She had put that look on her daughter’s face, and now she didn’t know how to fix it. Maybe everyone was right. Maybe she didn’t know what was best for Cara. If she did, Cara would have never had that look on her face. The same look that she’d put on Sam’s face for years. She’d lost Sam because of that, and now it seemed that she was losing Cara as well.
She crawled into her large empty bed, curled up into a little ball and cried until she had no more tears left.
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Sam stood in the doorway to the living room watching Cara go through the exercise routine for a second time. She’d been surprised when, earlier in the week, Cara had asked her to buy an exercise disc they had at the store. When she’d questioned it, the younger brunette just shrugged and said that they’d been reading a chapter in health about exercise. Which Sam attributed to Cara’s sudden interest in healthy eating. The girl had declared that same night that she’d no longer be eating junk food or meat. That was when Sam could get her to eat at all.
Cara had become sullen and extremely withdrawn after that night at the football game. She wouldn’t speak to anyone unless spoken to, and even then she would either snap or burst into tears. She was either in her room studying and doing homework, or exercising. Aside from the sudden emotional outburst, Sam knew she really had nothing to be concerned about, but something wasn’t right. It had been a month, and not only was Cara’s behavior becoming more extreme, but she refused to see or talk to Brooke.
Sam shuddered at the thought of what had happened the one and only time Brooke had shown up at the house. Sam had suggested that maybe seeing Brooke would help ease some of Cara’s hurt and anger, but that had been a huge mistake. The girl had taken one look at her blonde mother and gone ballistic. Yelling, throwing things and she wouldn’t let Brooke anywhere near her. She stormed out of the kitchen and up to her room. Sam had never seen such hurt in Brooke’s eyes before. She was torn as to whom to comfort. By then Brooke had started to cry, something she hadn’t her ex-wife do since that night they finally realized it was truly over between the two of them. She’d held Brooke that night as she cried just like she did today. Then Brooke had left and she’d found Cara curled up in a ball on the bed. She seemed so small, so fragile, and she refused to let Sam comfort her, she just cried and cried, until eventually she fell asleep.
Brooke still called everyday, but Cara didn’t seem to care. She would just continue with what she was doing as if Sam hadn’t said anything to her. Then there was the fact that Cara seemed to be going out of her way to impress Kat. Whenever the older blonde was around, Cara monopolized all of her time, showing her drawings and projects, sharing her good grades off, and she’d taken a great interest in soccer. Cara had always hated sports, especially soccer, but it was Kat’s favorite sport, and now she was talking about joining the team in the spring. To an outside person, it would seem that Cara was just adjusting to their new family situation well, but she was adjusting a little too well for Sam’s comfort.
“Hey Carebear, why don’t you take a break from exercising and come out to lunch with me? We haven’t done that it a while,” Sam suggested as she walked into the living room.
Cara paused the DVD and took a long drink of her bottled water. She regarded Sam uncertainly for a moment before replying, “Nah, that’s okay. I’m not really hungry. Besides I only have a little bit left to go. Then I wanted to go work on my art project.”
Sam frowned at this. “You only had a banana for breakfast. You have to be starving by now, Care, come on. Come have lunch with me.”
“I said I’m not hungry, Mom.” Cara snapped, her hazel eyes flashing.
“You haven’t been hungry a lot lately, Cara.” Sam snapped back before she could tamp down her anger. She pinched the bridge of her nose, and decided to try and take a different approach. “What’s going on with you lately, Care?”
Cara frowned and took another drink from her bottle. “Nothing’s wrong,” she said slowly, but Sam could see something in her eyes. Something familiar, but she couldn’t put her finger on it.
“I thought we were close. I thought we didn’t lie to one another.”
“I’m not lying to you,” Cara replied defensively.
“Yes, you are. There’s obviously something wrong. You hardly eat or sleep anymore. Whenever anyone says anything to you, you either cry or you snap at them. You’re moody. What’s going on? Is it because of Mim?”
That was the wrong thing to say. Cara’s eyes immediately flashed with anger. “I said I was fine, Mom! Why don’t you believe me? I’ve never lied to you,” she replied bitterly. Then she turned back around, hit play on the video, and started exercising again as if Sam wasn’t even in the room anymore.
Sam retreated. She needed to get a reign on her emotions. There was something going on with Cara, and no matter how she tried to get to her, to get her to open up, she just couldn’t. You keep forgetting she’s half McPherson too, she reminded herself. Still, in all of her years of practice, Sam had never retreated within herself as far as Cara seemed to be going, and she was afraid if she didn’t figure it out soon, she would lose Cara forever.
Later that night at dinner, Kat and Sam watched Cara separate each of the portions of food in half before eating. This was also part of Cara’s new personality. She would only eat small portions of food. Sam had gotten her to eat chicken, albeit reluctantly, but since Kat was there, she had acquiesced without too much probing. Sam didn’t understand why Cara seemed to be so docile in the older woman’s presence, but so independent when it came to Sam or anyone else trying to help her.
Kat shot Sam a look while after watching Cara’s new eating ritual. Sam just shrugged and shook her head.
“Hey, Cara, whatcha doing there?” Kat asked casually.
“What? Huh? Oh, I’m separating the food into smaller parts.” Cara replied as if it was the most logical explanation and she couldn’t understand how no one else got it.
“Okay, I got that, but why are your separating the food into smaller parts?” Kat asked winking at Sam.
“I read that Americans eat portions that are far greater than they should. Do you know that America has been the most obese country in the world for a better part of a century?”
“Oh, really? Is that what you guys have been talking about in health class?” Sam chimed in. It was good to see some of the old Cara shining through.
“What? Oh yeah, in health class…” Cara replied quietly before turning back to her food.
She stayed quiet the rest of dinner, only answering questions when spoken to directly, and refusing to hold anyone’s gaze for longer than a second. She finished her dinner, having only finished exactly half the portions and nothing more. Then she asked to be excused, and went upstairs to work on her homework. As she left Sam looked at the half eaten plate. Cara hadn’t eaten anything since lunch, and even that had just been a small bowl of fruit salad. She was really starting to get worried, but Cara had lost her appetite and stopped eating for a little while after Brooke had moved out. The family therapist had said that she was suffering from severe depression, and for them not to worry, and sure enough after two weeks of counseling, Cara’s appetite had come back. Maybe they should try family counseling again, she thought, but she knew that the only thing they needed to work on was getting Brooke and Cara’s relationship back together.
She would just have to convince Cara to talk to Brooke, to give her another chance, because Brooke was really trying, and Sam knew that. She knew that this wasn’t easy for Brooke. It couldn’t be easy for your own child to reject you. Especially after your own mother had done the same to you at such an early age. Brooke needed Cara just as much as Cara needed Brooke. So Sam would just find a way to fix this mess. I deserve ‘Mother of the Year’ for the things those two put me through, she thought with a smirk.
“What are you smiling at?” Kat asked as she gazed over at the brunette.
“Oh nothing, just thinking about what an amazing girlfriend I have.” Sam said as her smile grew wider, and she returned Kat’s gaze.
“Correction, you have an amazing fiancée.” Kat stated as she walked over to Sam’s chair and pulled her to her feet.
“Oh, then I stand corrected.” Sam replied huskily as she pressed her lips to the blonde’s. She wrapped her arms around her neck and deepened the kiss. It wasn’t long before they lost themselves in the embrace.
Neither knowing that a young girl sat and watched with tears shimmering in her hazel eyes.
tbc
From that point on every time Sam would do a close up on the young girl’s face, she captured Cara’s sadness, hurt and disappointment. Every time Brooke had to watch it, she felt like she was being stabbed in the chest. She had done that. She had put that look on her daughter’s face, and now she didn’t know how to fix it. Maybe everyone was right. Maybe she didn’t know what was best for Cara. If she did, Cara would have never had that look on her face. The same look that she’d put on Sam’s face for years. She’d lost Sam because of that, and now it seemed that she was losing Cara as well.
She crawled into her large empty bed, curled up into a little ball and cried until she had no more tears left.
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Sam stood in the doorway to the living room watching Cara go through the exercise routine for a second time. She’d been surprised when, earlier in the week, Cara had asked her to buy an exercise disc they had at the store. When she’d questioned it, the younger brunette just shrugged and said that they’d been reading a chapter in health about exercise. Which Sam attributed to Cara’s sudden interest in healthy eating. The girl had declared that same night that she’d no longer be eating junk food or meat. That was when Sam could get her to eat at all.
Cara had become sullen and extremely withdrawn after that night at the football game. She wouldn’t speak to anyone unless spoken to, and even then she would either snap or burst into tears. She was either in her room studying and doing homework, or exercising. Aside from the sudden emotional outburst, Sam knew she really had nothing to be concerned about, but something wasn’t right. It had been a month, and not only was Cara’s behavior becoming more extreme, but she refused to see or talk to Brooke.
Sam shuddered at the thought of what had happened the one and only time Brooke had shown up at the house. Sam had suggested that maybe seeing Brooke would help ease some of Cara’s hurt and anger, but that had been a huge mistake. The girl had taken one look at her blonde mother and gone ballistic. Yelling, throwing things and she wouldn’t let Brooke anywhere near her. She stormed out of the kitchen and up to her room. Sam had never seen such hurt in Brooke’s eyes before. She was torn as to whom to comfort. By then Brooke had started to cry, something she hadn’t her ex-wife do since that night they finally realized it was truly over between the two of them. She’d held Brooke that night as she cried just like she did today. Then Brooke had left and she’d found Cara curled up in a ball on the bed. She seemed so small, so fragile, and she refused to let Sam comfort her, she just cried and cried, until eventually she fell asleep.
Brooke still called everyday, but Cara didn’t seem to care. She would just continue with what she was doing as if Sam hadn’t said anything to her. Then there was the fact that Cara seemed to be going out of her way to impress Kat. Whenever the older blonde was around, Cara monopolized all of her time, showing her drawings and projects, sharing her good grades off, and she’d taken a great interest in soccer. Cara had always hated sports, especially soccer, but it was Kat’s favorite sport, and now she was talking about joining the team in the spring. To an outside person, it would seem that Cara was just adjusting to their new family situation well, but she was adjusting a little too well for Sam’s comfort.
“Hey Carebear, why don’t you take a break from exercising and come out to lunch with me? We haven’t done that it a while,” Sam suggested as she walked into the living room.
Cara paused the DVD and took a long drink of her bottled water. She regarded Sam uncertainly for a moment before replying, “Nah, that’s okay. I’m not really hungry. Besides I only have a little bit left to go. Then I wanted to go work on my art project.”
Sam frowned at this. “You only had a banana for breakfast. You have to be starving by now, Care, come on. Come have lunch with me.”
“I said I’m not hungry, Mom.” Cara snapped, her hazel eyes flashing.
“You haven’t been hungry a lot lately, Cara.” Sam snapped back before she could tamp down her anger. She pinched the bridge of her nose, and decided to try and take a different approach. “What’s going on with you lately, Care?”
Cara frowned and took another drink from her bottle. “Nothing’s wrong,” she said slowly, but Sam could see something in her eyes. Something familiar, but she couldn’t put her finger on it.
“I thought we were close. I thought we didn’t lie to one another.”
“I’m not lying to you,” Cara replied defensively.
“Yes, you are. There’s obviously something wrong. You hardly eat or sleep anymore. Whenever anyone says anything to you, you either cry or you snap at them. You’re moody. What’s going on? Is it because of Mim?”
That was the wrong thing to say. Cara’s eyes immediately flashed with anger. “I said I was fine, Mom! Why don’t you believe me? I’ve never lied to you,” she replied bitterly. Then she turned back around, hit play on the video, and started exercising again as if Sam wasn’t even in the room anymore.
Sam retreated. She needed to get a reign on her emotions. There was something going on with Cara, and no matter how she tried to get to her, to get her to open up, she just couldn’t. You keep forgetting she’s half McPherson too, she reminded herself. Still, in all of her years of practice, Sam had never retreated within herself as far as Cara seemed to be going, and she was afraid if she didn’t figure it out soon, she would lose Cara forever.
Later that night at dinner, Kat and Sam watched Cara separate each of the portions of food in half before eating. This was also part of Cara’s new personality. She would only eat small portions of food. Sam had gotten her to eat chicken, albeit reluctantly, but since Kat was there, she had acquiesced without too much probing. Sam didn’t understand why Cara seemed to be so docile in the older woman’s presence, but so independent when it came to Sam or anyone else trying to help her.
Kat shot Sam a look while after watching Cara’s new eating ritual. Sam just shrugged and shook her head.
“Hey, Cara, whatcha doing there?” Kat asked casually.
“What? Huh? Oh, I’m separating the food into smaller parts.” Cara replied as if it was the most logical explanation and she couldn’t understand how no one else got it.
“Okay, I got that, but why are your separating the food into smaller parts?” Kat asked winking at Sam.
“I read that Americans eat portions that are far greater than they should. Do you know that America has been the most obese country in the world for a better part of a century?”
“Oh, really? Is that what you guys have been talking about in health class?” Sam chimed in. It was good to see some of the old Cara shining through.
“What? Oh yeah, in health class…” Cara replied quietly before turning back to her food.
She stayed quiet the rest of dinner, only answering questions when spoken to directly, and refusing to hold anyone’s gaze for longer than a second. She finished her dinner, having only finished exactly half the portions and nothing more. Then she asked to be excused, and went upstairs to work on her homework. As she left Sam looked at the half eaten plate. Cara hadn’t eaten anything since lunch, and even that had just been a small bowl of fruit salad. She was really starting to get worried, but Cara had lost her appetite and stopped eating for a little while after Brooke had moved out. The family therapist had said that she was suffering from severe depression, and for them not to worry, and sure enough after two weeks of counseling, Cara’s appetite had come back. Maybe they should try family counseling again, she thought, but she knew that the only thing they needed to work on was getting Brooke and Cara’s relationship back together.
She would just have to convince Cara to talk to Brooke, to give her another chance, because Brooke was really trying, and Sam knew that. She knew that this wasn’t easy for Brooke. It couldn’t be easy for your own child to reject you. Especially after your own mother had done the same to you at such an early age. Brooke needed Cara just as much as Cara needed Brooke. So Sam would just find a way to fix this mess. I deserve ‘Mother of the Year’ for the things those two put me through, she thought with a smirk.
“What are you smiling at?” Kat asked as she gazed over at the brunette.
“Oh nothing, just thinking about what an amazing girlfriend I have.” Sam said as her smile grew wider, and she returned Kat’s gaze.
“Correction, you have an amazing fiancée.” Kat stated as she walked over to Sam’s chair and pulled her to her feet.
“Oh, then I stand corrected.” Sam replied huskily as she pressed her lips to the blonde’s. She wrapped her arms around her neck and deepened the kiss. It wasn’t long before they lost themselves in the embrace.
Neither knowing that a young girl sat and watched with tears shimmering in her hazel eyes.
tbc