FIC: Quarter Life Crisis (8/24?) - Shawn/Carlton - PG-13
Title: Quarter Life Crisis (8/24?)
author: PookaSeraph
pairing: Carlton/Shawn
rating: PG-13
disclaimer: Not mine, Never will be
summary: Shawn takes Carlton shopping. Fluff!
Previous Parts:
[One] | [Two] | [Three] | [Four] | [Five] | [Six] | [Seven]
Unnumbered future parts:
[ N ] | [N+1]
Chapter 8:
Carlton stared in abject horror as Shawn hopped out of the car and spread his arms wide. He wondered how exactly he let Shawn talk him into this.
"I'm really not sure I want to be here."
"Lassy! It's just the mall. Besides, it's totally my fault that heinously ugly shirt of yours got accidentally ripped in that mild scuffle last night."
"You did that on purpose."
"Yes I did. It wouldn't unbutton fast enough."
"I'm not sure I feel comfortable going *shopping* with you, Shawn."
"Please, your fashion sense is way too hetero, but at least someone taught you to dress in blue. We'll get you snazzy yet professional by the end of the day if it kills us."
"Shawn, you dress like a beach bum."
"But an incredibly sexy beach bum!" Carlton couldn't disagree with that. "Besides, I totally taught Gus all there is to know about color coordination. His sales figures thank me every month."
"I'm not buying anything pink."
"I wouldn't dream of it." Carlton glared at him. "Ok, yeah I would, you could work the pink, Carlton. But first -- Smoothies."
Carlton was not the type to go to the mall, if he was lucky he managed to go only one or two times per year to restock on whatever shirts he'd wore out. He wasn't certain that he trusted Shawn on this either; Shawn wore red and pink and green and God knows what else, and those were not the colors that cops wore.
Shawn sidled up to the smoothie cart where the girl behind the counter instantly recognized him.
"Shawn! Hey! Pineapple smoothie?" Carlton glowered, the last thing he wanted was Shawn dragging something pineapple flavored all over the mall. He wasn't interested in hives.
"Nah, I'll have --" Shawn actually pondered, "ooo, mango!"
The smoothie was prepared, Shawn paid, and then dragged the two of them further into the mall.
Carlton instantly gravitated towards the department store at the end of the mall but Shawn caught him by the wrist and tugged him towards one of those specialized boutique stores that he felt underdressed to even walk into.
"Shawn," he hissed in his ear, "your father is a detective, you know I can't shop somewhere like that!"
"They do hetero-casual there too, it's not like the whole store has gay-cooties."
"No I mean --" Carlton tried to set aside the embarrassment. "It's not like clothing is a large part of my budget. I could spend two months pay somewhere like that!"
"Oh!" Shawn stopped, looking considering for a moment. "Don't worry, I get an employee discount!"
"How do you get an employee discount at a store you don't work at?"
Shawn just shrugged and winked.
They entered the store and Carlton waited to be set upon by every eager salesmen ready to try to rake in some obscene commission. Instead they all seemed to flock to Shawn.
"Hank, Marcus, and of course Sally. How've you been?" His voice held that half flirty, half coy tone that Carlton found incredibly annoying, unless it was directed at him. Carlton ignored them, taking in the walls and floor displays, relatively certain this would be a huge waste of time. After a few moments, Shawn offered a casual, "We're gonna look around!" and the sales staff dispersed back to their various positions, fixing slightly out of place display items and waiting for anyone else to come into the store.
Shawn led him to a wall containing a wide variety of shirts in various colors Carlton considered 'over the top'. Shawn quickly grabbed and presented a pink shirt and Carlton glared at him, not amused.
"Ok, ok, Jeez!"
In a few seconds, Shawn had loaded up Carlton's arms with shirts in burgundy, light blue, darker blue, two shades of silver, one striped blue and a striped silver.
"Classic!" he exclaimed, clearly proud of the selection. Carlton checked the tags and was surprised and more than a little intrigued that Shawn had only selected shirts in his size. "We need to get you a new black and a new pinstripe."
Carlton was about to argue he wasn't going to pay an arm and a leg for suits here that he was just going to have to take to a tailor anyway. Shawn was clearly in one of his 'not listening' moods however when he stalked to the other side of the store. Carlton took a few moments to try to organize the massive pile of shirts Shawn had foisted upon him.
"I can take those for you, sir." The taller, male assistant, Marcus, Carlton thought, offered. Carlton sighed and handed over the shirts, he could always get Shawn to prune down the selection later. Shawn returned, holding out a very well tailored jacket.
"Try this one on." Carlton did as he was told. The suit needed some adjustment in the shoulders but otherwise fit wonderfully. Carlton shrugged off the jacket with some reluctance, it was a nice piece of clothing. Shawn held out two suits, "Awesome, right?"
Carlton nodded reluctantly.
Shawn raided the more casual parts of the store and for a moment Carlton was worried he was going to have something he was used to seeing on Shawn set on him. He was surprised when Shawn pulled out two pairs of jeans, several nice polos and three short sleeved shirts all which were of reasonable colors that Carlton was not terrified to wear. Shawn also produced a fist full of ties from God-knows-where all of which Carlton found understated and appropriate for the office.
Shawn finally pulled out another pink shirt and pouted quite intensely.
"Fine, but it's the first thing to go when this rings up over my credit card limit!" Shawn grinned and tucked it away with the rest of the clothes he had picked out.
Shawn shuffled Carlton over the to register and grinned as Marcus rung up the sale. Carlton checked his watch to avoid watching whatever the insanely high bill was going to wind up being. He was pretty sure less than twenty minutes had passed since they'd crossed the threshold into this damn store and Shawn was already working up to several mortgage payments worth of clothing.
"$786.43," Marcus announced the total and Carlton was completely poleaxed since that was easily ten times less what he had expected. Carlton mutely passed over a credit card.
"It's a small price to pay for fashion." Carlton actually agreed with Shawn on that one. He signed for the clothes.
"And Mr. Spencer, if you would sign for your discount." Shawn signed a second slip of paper with a brief flourish. Carlton wound up leaving carrying a half dozen bags of clothes, feeling ridiculous and overburdened.
A few store fronts down from the shop, he opened one of the bags and checked a hunch.
"Shawn this one suit was over a thousand dollars! How did the whole bill come to under eight hundred?"
"I told you, Carlton, employee discount!" Shawn grabbed two of the lighter bags and started to head off, only to stop and then turn around to face Carlton again. "We should get manicures!"
"Absolutely not."
"You're no fun!" But Shawn was grinning anyway.
* * *
Far more challenging than the actual shopping, which Shawn had referred to as 'dude shopping', was actually convincing himself to wear any of the clothing. His tailor, Antonio, had been quite surprised when Carlton had brought in the expensive suits instead of his usual department store fair. He'd also noticed Carlton was less tense, he told him to keep up whatever he was doing.
It was really Carlton's own business if the image that conjured up was of Shawn licking his way down Carlton's chest.
The new suits, shirts, and ties sat segregated in his closet for over two weeks. They weren't exactly gathering dust because Carlton found he picked them out almost every morning only to put them back in the closet and don his old clothes.
Shawn made no comment on Carlton's continued choice of wardrobe in their bi-weekly dates, but Carlton did occasionally worry that Shawn was going to do damage to another one of his shirts if he wore a particularly ugly one.
He finally worked his way around to what had been bothering him for weeks one evening over lo mien.
"How did you really get that employee discount, Shawn?"
"Is that really bothering you? Catholic guilt keeping you from profiting from what may be my ill-gotten gains?"
Lassiter glowered, but was safe in the knowledge that if he said 'yes' or said nothing at all, Shawn would eventually cave.
"First, Lassy, my father was a cop, so even at times in my life when opium smuggling would have been far more profitable than teaching english as a second language I did the latter not the former. Second, the answer to your question is nepotism. My mom works there and I get her employee discount."
"That's it?"
"You thought I slept with someone, admit it."
Carlton knew he probably looked slightly guilty, because Shawn was right, he had thought that Shawn might do something like that. Carlton nodded. He was pretty sure Shawn would not be out of line being incredibly mad, but instead Shawn decided it was an appropriate time to come over and straddle Carlton's lap.
Shawn leaned forward to whisper in his ear, "Carlton, even if that was at one point a valid method of acquiring a discount, it most certainly isn't any more."
Shawn ran his tongue across Carlton's ear and he pretty much didn't think about it for the rest of the night.
The next day, Carlton donned his burgundy shirt and a coordinating tie, hiding them under one of his older grey jackets. Of course, when O'Hara caught him coming into the station that morning the first words out of her mouth were: "Is that a new shirt, Lassiter?"
Lassiter just glowered, but that was mostly to keep him from smiling.
author: PookaSeraph
pairing: Carlton/Shawn
rating: PG-13
disclaimer: Not mine, Never will be
summary: Shawn takes Carlton shopping. Fluff!
Previous Parts:
[One] | [Two] | [Three] | [Four] | [Five] | [Six] | [Seven]
Unnumbered future parts:
[ N ] | [N+1]
Chapter 8:
Carlton stared in abject horror as Shawn hopped out of the car and spread his arms wide. He wondered how exactly he let Shawn talk him into this.
"I'm really not sure I want to be here."
"Lassy! It's just the mall. Besides, it's totally my fault that heinously ugly shirt of yours got accidentally ripped in that mild scuffle last night."
"You did that on purpose."
"Yes I did. It wouldn't unbutton fast enough."
"I'm not sure I feel comfortable going *shopping* with you, Shawn."
"Please, your fashion sense is way too hetero, but at least someone taught you to dress in blue. We'll get you snazzy yet professional by the end of the day if it kills us."
"Shawn, you dress like a beach bum."
"But an incredibly sexy beach bum!" Carlton couldn't disagree with that. "Besides, I totally taught Gus all there is to know about color coordination. His sales figures thank me every month."
"I'm not buying anything pink."
"I wouldn't dream of it." Carlton glared at him. "Ok, yeah I would, you could work the pink, Carlton. But first -- Smoothies."
Carlton was not the type to go to the mall, if he was lucky he managed to go only one or two times per year to restock on whatever shirts he'd wore out. He wasn't certain that he trusted Shawn on this either; Shawn wore red and pink and green and God knows what else, and those were not the colors that cops wore.
Shawn sidled up to the smoothie cart where the girl behind the counter instantly recognized him.
"Shawn! Hey! Pineapple smoothie?" Carlton glowered, the last thing he wanted was Shawn dragging something pineapple flavored all over the mall. He wasn't interested in hives.
"Nah, I'll have --" Shawn actually pondered, "ooo, mango!"
The smoothie was prepared, Shawn paid, and then dragged the two of them further into the mall.
Carlton instantly gravitated towards the department store at the end of the mall but Shawn caught him by the wrist and tugged him towards one of those specialized boutique stores that he felt underdressed to even walk into.
"Shawn," he hissed in his ear, "your father is a detective, you know I can't shop somewhere like that!"
"They do hetero-casual there too, it's not like the whole store has gay-cooties."
"No I mean --" Carlton tried to set aside the embarrassment. "It's not like clothing is a large part of my budget. I could spend two months pay somewhere like that!"
"Oh!" Shawn stopped, looking considering for a moment. "Don't worry, I get an employee discount!"
"How do you get an employee discount at a store you don't work at?"
Shawn just shrugged and winked.
They entered the store and Carlton waited to be set upon by every eager salesmen ready to try to rake in some obscene commission. Instead they all seemed to flock to Shawn.
"Hank, Marcus, and of course Sally. How've you been?" His voice held that half flirty, half coy tone that Carlton found incredibly annoying, unless it was directed at him. Carlton ignored them, taking in the walls and floor displays, relatively certain this would be a huge waste of time. After a few moments, Shawn offered a casual, "We're gonna look around!" and the sales staff dispersed back to their various positions, fixing slightly out of place display items and waiting for anyone else to come into the store.
Shawn led him to a wall containing a wide variety of shirts in various colors Carlton considered 'over the top'. Shawn quickly grabbed and presented a pink shirt and Carlton glared at him, not amused.
"Ok, ok, Jeez!"
In a few seconds, Shawn had loaded up Carlton's arms with shirts in burgundy, light blue, darker blue, two shades of silver, one striped blue and a striped silver.
"Classic!" he exclaimed, clearly proud of the selection. Carlton checked the tags and was surprised and more than a little intrigued that Shawn had only selected shirts in his size. "We need to get you a new black and a new pinstripe."
Carlton was about to argue he wasn't going to pay an arm and a leg for suits here that he was just going to have to take to a tailor anyway. Shawn was clearly in one of his 'not listening' moods however when he stalked to the other side of the store. Carlton took a few moments to try to organize the massive pile of shirts Shawn had foisted upon him.
"I can take those for you, sir." The taller, male assistant, Marcus, Carlton thought, offered. Carlton sighed and handed over the shirts, he could always get Shawn to prune down the selection later. Shawn returned, holding out a very well tailored jacket.
"Try this one on." Carlton did as he was told. The suit needed some adjustment in the shoulders but otherwise fit wonderfully. Carlton shrugged off the jacket with some reluctance, it was a nice piece of clothing. Shawn held out two suits, "Awesome, right?"
Carlton nodded reluctantly.
Shawn raided the more casual parts of the store and for a moment Carlton was worried he was going to have something he was used to seeing on Shawn set on him. He was surprised when Shawn pulled out two pairs of jeans, several nice polos and three short sleeved shirts all which were of reasonable colors that Carlton was not terrified to wear. Shawn also produced a fist full of ties from God-knows-where all of which Carlton found understated and appropriate for the office.
Shawn finally pulled out another pink shirt and pouted quite intensely.
"Fine, but it's the first thing to go when this rings up over my credit card limit!" Shawn grinned and tucked it away with the rest of the clothes he had picked out.
Shawn shuffled Carlton over the to register and grinned as Marcus rung up the sale. Carlton checked his watch to avoid watching whatever the insanely high bill was going to wind up being. He was pretty sure less than twenty minutes had passed since they'd crossed the threshold into this damn store and Shawn was already working up to several mortgage payments worth of clothing.
"$786.43," Marcus announced the total and Carlton was completely poleaxed since that was easily ten times less what he had expected. Carlton mutely passed over a credit card.
"It's a small price to pay for fashion." Carlton actually agreed with Shawn on that one. He signed for the clothes.
"And Mr. Spencer, if you would sign for your discount." Shawn signed a second slip of paper with a brief flourish. Carlton wound up leaving carrying a half dozen bags of clothes, feeling ridiculous and overburdened.
A few store fronts down from the shop, he opened one of the bags and checked a hunch.
"Shawn this one suit was over a thousand dollars! How did the whole bill come to under eight hundred?"
"I told you, Carlton, employee discount!" Shawn grabbed two of the lighter bags and started to head off, only to stop and then turn around to face Carlton again. "We should get manicures!"
"Absolutely not."
"You're no fun!" But Shawn was grinning anyway.
* * *
Far more challenging than the actual shopping, which Shawn had referred to as 'dude shopping', was actually convincing himself to wear any of the clothing. His tailor, Antonio, had been quite surprised when Carlton had brought in the expensive suits instead of his usual department store fair. He'd also noticed Carlton was less tense, he told him to keep up whatever he was doing.
It was really Carlton's own business if the image that conjured up was of Shawn licking his way down Carlton's chest.
The new suits, shirts, and ties sat segregated in his closet for over two weeks. They weren't exactly gathering dust because Carlton found he picked them out almost every morning only to put them back in the closet and don his old clothes.
Shawn made no comment on Carlton's continued choice of wardrobe in their bi-weekly dates, but Carlton did occasionally worry that Shawn was going to do damage to another one of his shirts if he wore a particularly ugly one.
He finally worked his way around to what had been bothering him for weeks one evening over lo mien.
"How did you really get that employee discount, Shawn?"
"Is that really bothering you? Catholic guilt keeping you from profiting from what may be my ill-gotten gains?"
Lassiter glowered, but was safe in the knowledge that if he said 'yes' or said nothing at all, Shawn would eventually cave.
"First, Lassy, my father was a cop, so even at times in my life when opium smuggling would have been far more profitable than teaching english as a second language I did the latter not the former. Second, the answer to your question is nepotism. My mom works there and I get her employee discount."
"That's it?"
"You thought I slept with someone, admit it."
Carlton knew he probably looked slightly guilty, because Shawn was right, he had thought that Shawn might do something like that. Carlton nodded. He was pretty sure Shawn would not be out of line being incredibly mad, but instead Shawn decided it was an appropriate time to come over and straddle Carlton's lap.
Shawn leaned forward to whisper in his ear, "Carlton, even if that was at one point a valid method of acquiring a discount, it most certainly isn't any more."
Shawn ran his tongue across Carlton's ear and he pretty much didn't think about it for the rest of the night.
The next day, Carlton donned his burgundy shirt and a coordinating tie, hiding them under one of his older grey jackets. Of course, when O'Hara caught him coming into the station that morning the first words out of her mouth were: "Is that a new shirt, Lassiter?"
Lassiter just glowered, but that was mostly to keep him from smiling.