Fanfiction - Kaleidoscope
Title: Kaleidoscope
Rating: PG
Pairing: Takaki Yuya X Yabu Kouta
Summary: When Hey!Say!JUMP is suddenly suspended, Takaki Yuya continues to perform with Kiriyama Akito and Nakama Junta, all the while dealing with a changing relationship with his boyfriend, Yabu Kouta.
Prompt: Break ups are good for the soul
Warnings: Minor language.
Notes: Written for je_ficgames (Team What-If). Writing this was a lot harder then I thought with two themes to incorporate but I hope you enjoy~♥
When the door had opened, the last person Takaki Yuya had expected to see was Yabu Kouta. Yet there he was, standing in the doorway, shifting side to side, uncertainty written across his face and a white rose in his hand.
Yuya had kept the dressing door room locked, trying to keep his nerves and temper away from unsuspecting Juniors and from Akito and Junta. None of them deserved another hissy fit. Having expected the knock on the door to be their manager or maybe Junta, Yuya was at a loss of what to do with Kouta standing there.
~*~*~
”Kou-chan.” Fiddling with the drawstring of his sweatpants, Yuya nodded to the door. “Can I talk to you?”
“Mm?” Looking up from where he was huddled, deep in conversation with Keito, Kouta smiled and nodded. “Can you give me a minute please? I'll be right there.”
“Kouta.” The note of urgency in Yuya's voice had the room's seven other occupants focusing on him suddenly. Obviously Yuya wasn't trying to draw his boyfriend out of the dressing room for a good old-fashioned make out session with his expression so serious. “Now. Please?” There was an emotion in Yuya's voice that no one could quite place, an edge that they'd never heard before.
Frowning questioningly, Kouta slid off the couch and stepped out the door, waiting until the younger one shut it. “What's up, Yuuyan?”
Not replying until he'd tugged him a ways away - you never knew who would press their ear to the door - Yuya turned to face him, still wearing that peculiar expression.
Kouta raised an eyebrow. “Yuuyan?”
Yuya looked down at his fingers for a few moments before speaking up, his words slow and careful. “I just wanted you to be the first one to know. Johnny-san... Johnny-san thinks that with JUMP still on suspension... it'd be best for 'You and I'...” He paused, giving Kouta a searching look. “They're starting to draw up plans for a new single. And we'll still be doing our spring tour,” he finally admitted.
He was, of course referring to group '悠&愛', read as You&I, the name considered a joke on how Johnny-san never called anyone by name, instead using the pronoun 'You'. It was a trio that had debuted six months earlier, Yuya's second group alongside Kiriyama Akito and Nakama Junta.
The older boy had stilled with those words and Yuya frowned, peering at him in concern. “Kouta?”
~*~*~
“Yabu-kun...” The switch back to formalities bothered Kouta, but Yuya couldn't help but think about how they hadn't spoken for nearly two months. And he wasn't about to forget how their last conversation had gone.
“Sorry.” Kouta schooled his expression into a tentative smile. “Can I come in?”
Yuya blinked for a moment, glancing over his shoulder at the disaster of a dressing room. (Between Akito and himself (and Junta being so busy) it was quite a sight.) “Sure.” He stepped aside, allowing the older boy inside. Even though he thought it was silly, he couldn't ignore the knot of dread forming in his gut.
Things had fallen to complete chaos since the day he'd received a phone-call informing him that Yaotome Hikaru and Yamada Ryousuke had been arrested during a public brawl. JUMP withdrew from promotional activities and went on an indefinite suspension. It had hit everyone hard, but Kouta had maybe taken it the hardest, and it showed.
The last encounter hadn't been pretty.
And to be perfectly honest, today was not the day to deal with another one.
~*~*~
“Whatever.” Kouta shrugged, stepping away, his tone filled with flecks of sarcasm. “Have fun with that.”
Lips thinning as he planted his hands on his hips, Yuya snapped. “Just what the fuck is your problem?”
“Well, I guess it doesn't really matter,” Kouta replied coolly, turning away and starting to walk down the hallway. “And here I thought this mattered to you,” he shot over his shoulder.
“What?” Jumping after Kouta, Yuya grabbed him, yanking him back around. “What did you just say?” A part of him just wanted to hear it again, just wanted to make sure Kouta had said it, even if he'd heard every word with perfect clarity.
“Does it matter?” Kouta asked waspishly, trying to pull away. But Yuya held on firm, eyes flashing. “Fuck off, Yuya, I don't want to hear about it.” The tone of voice, with its sarcastic, icy edge, was all it took to get Yuya going.
“I'm the one who doesn't care?!” He exploded on him. “What about you? You're so wrapped up in your emo-bullshit, you don't even care that your entire fucking group is already falling apart.” Placing his hands on Kouta's chest, he shoved. “You're not even trying, don't pretend like you do,” he hissed. “You won't even talk to Yama-chan! Why won't you? Do you still blame him for all of this happening? Never mind that Hikaru was also in the damn fight which is why we're like this in the first place! But noooo, poor innocent Hikaru!” Yuya's voice turned mocking, and he was jabbing the older one in the chest to punctuate his words. “He can't do anything wroooong. Would you just fuck off and stop pretending like you think the rest of us matter? It's always been about you two.” The words just wouldn't stop coming out... and maybe Yuya didn't want them to. He couldn't tell anymore; he was beyond being reasonable about this.
“You want it straight up honest?” There was unmistakable fury in Kouta's voice as he shoved Yuya up against a wall, knocking his hands away. “Ever since you three got cast in Gokusen, it's like you suddenly couldn't give JUMP the time of day. You were always hanging out with Nakama, always getting lunch with Kiriyama. Fucking hell, Yuya, even I have to fight for your attention and I'm your damn boyfriend! Your pride is such a fucking annoyance because you act like you're all that when you're really just scared of what everyone thinks of you and you'd do anything to keep them happy.” There was a crude leer in Kouta's voice as he said this.
Things simply deteriorated after that as Yuya snarled, slamming his fist into Kouta's gut.
~*~*~
Sitting on the couch, on opposite ends from each other, all Yuya could think of was how these quiet moments used to be a safe oasis from the chaos of their lives. Now it was just awkward and tense. Yuya glanced down at his lap, unable to keep the grimace off his face. He wanted to relax, wanted to just smile and make a casual comment, but it just wouldn't come out. All that was left was that knot of unease.
Two months was a long time.
“So...” Kouta cleared his throat before hesitantly offering the rose. “I just wanted to say--”
Yuya held up a hand, shaking his head. “Don't. Please.” The soft note of a plea slipped into his voice. He couldn't help that. What else could possibly be said anymore?
Or was he just giving up too soon and running away from everything?
He loved JUMP, the boys in it and the unit itself. It had brought him so many special memories and friendships that could never be replaced. He'd found more than one kind of love within Hey!Say!JUMP.
But You&I was different. It was just the three of them again, and Yuya was suddenly acutely aware of how much he'd missed the flow he'd had when working with B.A.D, how things just worked between the three of them. There wasn't any of the random cat fights that often erupted with JUMP. Another thing Yuya came to love was the freedom they had. They all composed their own solos, designed concert concepts, even got to work out some of their own costuming. It was refreshing, a feeling that had Yuya soaring every single practice.
It was two very different sides of the same coin, wasn't it? Hey! Say! JUMP and You&I. They were both a part of him.
But who was he now?
~*~*~
It didn't take too long for other boys to rush in and pull them apart. No great damage had been dealt, Yuya felt as he was put in a headlock, watching as Kouta was dragged a good distance away. People fanned between them and Kitayama Hiromitsu suddenly appeared in front of him.
“If you calm down,” the older man began, rather calmly, “Tamamori'll let you go... or we can just stay like this for a while. Your choice, Takaki-kun.”
Yuya glowered at him for a moment, half snarling, but the small comment of 'Wall-san, I think Takaki-kun's face wants to say hello' was creepy enough for him to quit struggling, waiting for the other boy to release him before straightening up. He still felt the anger rolling around inside, but it was already ebbing away, leaving him feeling oddly cold.
Kitayama regarded him for a few moments before nodding his head down the hallway. “Come on,” was all he said before walking away, Yuya reluctantly following in his wake.
“So?” They were tucked away on a small couch, half hidden behind some unfortunate looking vending machines, all drab and dusty, small dents and scrapes marring their surfaces. “What was that all about?” Kitayama's tone would have been amused had it not sounded so disappointed.
Yuya rubbed his eyes before explaining everything to the man as quickly and painlessly as possible, wanting to get this part over with. He was frustrated with himself, upset at the situation, and angry at Kouta. He didn't need the guilt to pile up on top of that, nor did he want the shame of having disappointed someone he valued.
“I see...” was all Kitayama said before falling silent for a few very long moments. He was probably doing it on purpose, Yuya reflected, squirming slightly. Letting him stew for a while.
“Well?” He finally asked, glancing through a curtain of horrendously messy hair.
“Well, what do you want me to say?” Kitayama arched an eyebrow. “I think you two were being dipshits for fighting over something that, I might point out, neither of you have control over. I also think it was really stupid to fight like that with how JUMP is right now...” The smaller male tapped a finger to his nose. “But on the other hand, it was bound to happen sometime. You guys were handling it too well...” That last part was spoken like an afterthought before Kitayama shrugged and continued. “Maybe he's right, Takaki-kun...”
Yuya's head whipped around and he gaped at Kitayama. “What?!” He couldn't believe it.
Kitayama silenced him with a frown. “Don't bite my head off before I'm done talking.” The man shifted around, moving to face Yuya on the couch. “I think you do care too much about what other people think...Being sensitive to other people's opinions is a good thing, Takaki-kun, but this--” Kitayama waved his hand, gesturing to the walls around him. “This is your dream, isn't it?”
Slowly, Yuya nodded.
“Nobody else should tell you how to dream your own dreams, Takaki-kun,” Kitayama told him, his eyes sparkling with a special warmth that Yuya rarely saw. “Try to remember that. You can't make everyone love everything you do. Just do what you love to do and everything else will work itself out.” Stretching, Kitayama stood, reaching over to smooth a lock of Yuya's hair. “And keep that temper in check. Anger is such a tiring thing. There's no point in wasting your time on it.” With a warm smile and a small wave, Kitayama walked away, vanishing around the corner, leaving Yuya to think things over.
~*~*~
“But Yuya, I need--” But Kouta was cut off again.
“No, no... I need to say this.” Yuya took a deep breath and looked Kouta in the eyes. “I'm sorry for the things I said. This is really late, I know... but I'm sorry. Maybe I meant those things, maybe I didn't...but I shouldn't have said it at all.” His heart was slowly squeezing its way up into his throat. “No matter what happens, Kouta, I want you to know that JUMP will always, always be a part of me... and that you'll always be my leader.” He meant it, every little word, and he hoped it showed because he wanted Kouta to know that. It had been on his mind a lot during the past two months and it felt good to finally say these sorts of things aloud.
Once he ran out of words, another silence settled over them, but it was different than before, the two of them collecting their own thoughts.
Kouta gave him a small, strained smile. “Just your leader?”
It was with sadness that Yuya returned his smile. “I'm sorry... Things just... A lot changed for me, that day. I realized things about myself and I just...” He glanced down at his finger, at a ring that he rarely took off for any reason. It had been the gift Kouta had given to him when he'd admitted to his feelings. In that moment, Yuya felt like crying and laughing. He had never dreamed things would turn out like this. He'd never wanted to dream something like that.
Suspensions and continuations, stops and starts, endings and beginnings. Everything had to start somewhere, and nothing was forever.
Gently pulling the ring from his finger, he took the other's hand, placing it in Kouta's palm before curling his fingers around it.
“I'm sorry...” Kouta murmured, his fingers tightening around the warm metal.
Yuya shook his head, still smiling that little sad smile. “Don't be. I just... Thinking about it, I'm not ready for this... for you, anyway.” It felt like giving up, and Yuya hated that. But with everything that had happened, Yuya realized how things had changed since that fight. He still cared a lot about Kouta and a part of him would always love him... but he knew that maybe they had to let go to move forward.
Kouta's expression was an unreadable mix of emotions, but the smile he gave was genuine. “I'm proud of you, Yuya,” he whispered, laying the white rose in Yuya's fingers. There were words left unsaid in the air between them, like wishes that had no star to be wished upon.
I'll miss you.
I'll always be by your side.
I'm sorry.
I love you.
---
[A new beginning - Tokyo Dome]
“Are you ready?” Junta asked, giving the other two boys a once over, double checking for any possible wardrobe or technological malfunctions.
Akito was shifting from side to side, peeking out the tunnel they'd be ducking through to enter the stage. The unending noises of the waiting crowd had him grinning, and he twitched away from Junta. “C'mon, Junta...” he laughed. “We're fine! It's almost time, will you stop being a mother hen?”
Junta rolled his eyes good-naturedly as the other boy and turned to Yuya, nudging him gently. “Yuya... you ready?”
Yuya had been staring off in the direction of the stage and snapped back to attention at the sound of his name. “Mm?” He gave Junta a bright smile. “Roger that.”
They stood at the entrance, waiting, letting the intro music get the fans roused in expectation. Yuya held his breath, feeling his heart pound in his throat. At either side, a warm hand took his, and Junta and Akito smiled at him. He couldn't help but smile back as he refocused.
Dreams had a strange way of coming true, he decided as they ran onto the stage, fingers still linked, Akito screaming at the crowd to make some noise.
But he wouldn't trade where he was for the world.
It wasn't the end, just a new beginning.
_______________________________________________
A/N: My original piece for the games. I seriously cried over this and convinced at least three of my friends that I was going insane. In the end, I'm not completely satisfied with this but I do like it. Team What-If was a very difficult team to write for.
Rating: PG
Pairing: Takaki Yuya X Yabu Kouta
Summary: When Hey!Say!JUMP is suddenly suspended, Takaki Yuya continues to perform with Kiriyama Akito and Nakama Junta, all the while dealing with a changing relationship with his boyfriend, Yabu Kouta.
Prompt: Break ups are good for the soul
Warnings: Minor language.
Notes: Written for je_ficgames (Team What-If). Writing this was a lot harder then I thought with two themes to incorporate but I hope you enjoy~♥
When the door had opened, the last person Takaki Yuya had expected to see was Yabu Kouta. Yet there he was, standing in the doorway, shifting side to side, uncertainty written across his face and a white rose in his hand.
Yuya had kept the dressing door room locked, trying to keep his nerves and temper away from unsuspecting Juniors and from Akito and Junta. None of them deserved another hissy fit. Having expected the knock on the door to be their manager or maybe Junta, Yuya was at a loss of what to do with Kouta standing there.
~*~*~
”Kou-chan.” Fiddling with the drawstring of his sweatpants, Yuya nodded to the door. “Can I talk to you?”
“Mm?” Looking up from where he was huddled, deep in conversation with Keito, Kouta smiled and nodded. “Can you give me a minute please? I'll be right there.”
“Kouta.” The note of urgency in Yuya's voice had the room's seven other occupants focusing on him suddenly. Obviously Yuya wasn't trying to draw his boyfriend out of the dressing room for a good old-fashioned make out session with his expression so serious. “Now. Please?” There was an emotion in Yuya's voice that no one could quite place, an edge that they'd never heard before.
Frowning questioningly, Kouta slid off the couch and stepped out the door, waiting until the younger one shut it. “What's up, Yuuyan?”
Not replying until he'd tugged him a ways away - you never knew who would press their ear to the door - Yuya turned to face him, still wearing that peculiar expression.
Kouta raised an eyebrow. “Yuuyan?”
Yuya looked down at his fingers for a few moments before speaking up, his words slow and careful. “I just wanted you to be the first one to know. Johnny-san... Johnny-san thinks that with JUMP still on suspension... it'd be best for 'You and I'...” He paused, giving Kouta a searching look. “They're starting to draw up plans for a new single. And we'll still be doing our spring tour,” he finally admitted.
He was, of course referring to group '悠&愛', read as You&I, the name considered a joke on how Johnny-san never called anyone by name, instead using the pronoun 'You'. It was a trio that had debuted six months earlier, Yuya's second group alongside Kiriyama Akito and Nakama Junta.
The older boy had stilled with those words and Yuya frowned, peering at him in concern. “Kouta?”
~*~*~
“Yabu-kun...” The switch back to formalities bothered Kouta, but Yuya couldn't help but think about how they hadn't spoken for nearly two months. And he wasn't about to forget how their last conversation had gone.
“Sorry.” Kouta schooled his expression into a tentative smile. “Can I come in?”
Yuya blinked for a moment, glancing over his shoulder at the disaster of a dressing room. (Between Akito and himself (and Junta being so busy) it was quite a sight.) “Sure.” He stepped aside, allowing the older boy inside. Even though he thought it was silly, he couldn't ignore the knot of dread forming in his gut.
Things had fallen to complete chaos since the day he'd received a phone-call informing him that Yaotome Hikaru and Yamada Ryousuke had been arrested during a public brawl. JUMP withdrew from promotional activities and went on an indefinite suspension. It had hit everyone hard, but Kouta had maybe taken it the hardest, and it showed.
The last encounter hadn't been pretty.
And to be perfectly honest, today was not the day to deal with another one.
~*~*~
“Whatever.” Kouta shrugged, stepping away, his tone filled with flecks of sarcasm. “Have fun with that.”
Lips thinning as he planted his hands on his hips, Yuya snapped. “Just what the fuck is your problem?”
“Well, I guess it doesn't really matter,” Kouta replied coolly, turning away and starting to walk down the hallway. “And here I thought this mattered to you,” he shot over his shoulder.
“What?” Jumping after Kouta, Yuya grabbed him, yanking him back around. “What did you just say?” A part of him just wanted to hear it again, just wanted to make sure Kouta had said it, even if he'd heard every word with perfect clarity.
“Does it matter?” Kouta asked waspishly, trying to pull away. But Yuya held on firm, eyes flashing. “Fuck off, Yuya, I don't want to hear about it.” The tone of voice, with its sarcastic, icy edge, was all it took to get Yuya going.
“I'm the one who doesn't care?!” He exploded on him. “What about you? You're so wrapped up in your emo-bullshit, you don't even care that your entire fucking group is already falling apart.” Placing his hands on Kouta's chest, he shoved. “You're not even trying, don't pretend like you do,” he hissed. “You won't even talk to Yama-chan! Why won't you? Do you still blame him for all of this happening? Never mind that Hikaru was also in the damn fight which is why we're like this in the first place! But noooo, poor innocent Hikaru!” Yuya's voice turned mocking, and he was jabbing the older one in the chest to punctuate his words. “He can't do anything wroooong. Would you just fuck off and stop pretending like you think the rest of us matter? It's always been about you two.” The words just wouldn't stop coming out... and maybe Yuya didn't want them to. He couldn't tell anymore; he was beyond being reasonable about this.
“You want it straight up honest?” There was unmistakable fury in Kouta's voice as he shoved Yuya up against a wall, knocking his hands away. “Ever since you three got cast in Gokusen, it's like you suddenly couldn't give JUMP the time of day. You were always hanging out with Nakama, always getting lunch with Kiriyama. Fucking hell, Yuya, even I have to fight for your attention and I'm your damn boyfriend! Your pride is such a fucking annoyance because you act like you're all that when you're really just scared of what everyone thinks of you and you'd do anything to keep them happy.” There was a crude leer in Kouta's voice as he said this.
Things simply deteriorated after that as Yuya snarled, slamming his fist into Kouta's gut.
~*~*~
Sitting on the couch, on opposite ends from each other, all Yuya could think of was how these quiet moments used to be a safe oasis from the chaos of their lives. Now it was just awkward and tense. Yuya glanced down at his lap, unable to keep the grimace off his face. He wanted to relax, wanted to just smile and make a casual comment, but it just wouldn't come out. All that was left was that knot of unease.
Two months was a long time.
“So...” Kouta cleared his throat before hesitantly offering the rose. “I just wanted to say--”
Yuya held up a hand, shaking his head. “Don't. Please.” The soft note of a plea slipped into his voice. He couldn't help that. What else could possibly be said anymore?
Or was he just giving up too soon and running away from everything?
He loved JUMP, the boys in it and the unit itself. It had brought him so many special memories and friendships that could never be replaced. He'd found more than one kind of love within Hey!Say!JUMP.
But You&I was different. It was just the three of them again, and Yuya was suddenly acutely aware of how much he'd missed the flow he'd had when working with B.A.D, how things just worked between the three of them. There wasn't any of the random cat fights that often erupted with JUMP. Another thing Yuya came to love was the freedom they had. They all composed their own solos, designed concert concepts, even got to work out some of their own costuming. It was refreshing, a feeling that had Yuya soaring every single practice.
It was two very different sides of the same coin, wasn't it? Hey! Say! JUMP and You&I. They were both a part of him.
But who was he now?
~*~*~
It didn't take too long for other boys to rush in and pull them apart. No great damage had been dealt, Yuya felt as he was put in a headlock, watching as Kouta was dragged a good distance away. People fanned between them and Kitayama Hiromitsu suddenly appeared in front of him.
“If you calm down,” the older man began, rather calmly, “Tamamori'll let you go... or we can just stay like this for a while. Your choice, Takaki-kun.”
Yuya glowered at him for a moment, half snarling, but the small comment of 'Wall-san, I think Takaki-kun's face wants to say hello' was creepy enough for him to quit struggling, waiting for the other boy to release him before straightening up. He still felt the anger rolling around inside, but it was already ebbing away, leaving him feeling oddly cold.
Kitayama regarded him for a few moments before nodding his head down the hallway. “Come on,” was all he said before walking away, Yuya reluctantly following in his wake.
“So?” They were tucked away on a small couch, half hidden behind some unfortunate looking vending machines, all drab and dusty, small dents and scrapes marring their surfaces. “What was that all about?” Kitayama's tone would have been amused had it not sounded so disappointed.
Yuya rubbed his eyes before explaining everything to the man as quickly and painlessly as possible, wanting to get this part over with. He was frustrated with himself, upset at the situation, and angry at Kouta. He didn't need the guilt to pile up on top of that, nor did he want the shame of having disappointed someone he valued.
“I see...” was all Kitayama said before falling silent for a few very long moments. He was probably doing it on purpose, Yuya reflected, squirming slightly. Letting him stew for a while.
“Well?” He finally asked, glancing through a curtain of horrendously messy hair.
“Well, what do you want me to say?” Kitayama arched an eyebrow. “I think you two were being dipshits for fighting over something that, I might point out, neither of you have control over. I also think it was really stupid to fight like that with how JUMP is right now...” The smaller male tapped a finger to his nose. “But on the other hand, it was bound to happen sometime. You guys were handling it too well...” That last part was spoken like an afterthought before Kitayama shrugged and continued. “Maybe he's right, Takaki-kun...”
Yuya's head whipped around and he gaped at Kitayama. “What?!” He couldn't believe it.
Kitayama silenced him with a frown. “Don't bite my head off before I'm done talking.” The man shifted around, moving to face Yuya on the couch. “I think you do care too much about what other people think...Being sensitive to other people's opinions is a good thing, Takaki-kun, but this--” Kitayama waved his hand, gesturing to the walls around him. “This is your dream, isn't it?”
Slowly, Yuya nodded.
“Nobody else should tell you how to dream your own dreams, Takaki-kun,” Kitayama told him, his eyes sparkling with a special warmth that Yuya rarely saw. “Try to remember that. You can't make everyone love everything you do. Just do what you love to do and everything else will work itself out.” Stretching, Kitayama stood, reaching over to smooth a lock of Yuya's hair. “And keep that temper in check. Anger is such a tiring thing. There's no point in wasting your time on it.” With a warm smile and a small wave, Kitayama walked away, vanishing around the corner, leaving Yuya to think things over.
~*~*~
“But Yuya, I need--” But Kouta was cut off again.
“No, no... I need to say this.” Yuya took a deep breath and looked Kouta in the eyes. “I'm sorry for the things I said. This is really late, I know... but I'm sorry. Maybe I meant those things, maybe I didn't...but I shouldn't have said it at all.” His heart was slowly squeezing its way up into his throat. “No matter what happens, Kouta, I want you to know that JUMP will always, always be a part of me... and that you'll always be my leader.” He meant it, every little word, and he hoped it showed because he wanted Kouta to know that. It had been on his mind a lot during the past two months and it felt good to finally say these sorts of things aloud.
Once he ran out of words, another silence settled over them, but it was different than before, the two of them collecting their own thoughts.
Kouta gave him a small, strained smile. “Just your leader?”
It was with sadness that Yuya returned his smile. “I'm sorry... Things just... A lot changed for me, that day. I realized things about myself and I just...” He glanced down at his finger, at a ring that he rarely took off for any reason. It had been the gift Kouta had given to him when he'd admitted to his feelings. In that moment, Yuya felt like crying and laughing. He had never dreamed things would turn out like this. He'd never wanted to dream something like that.
Suspensions and continuations, stops and starts, endings and beginnings. Everything had to start somewhere, and nothing was forever.
Gently pulling the ring from his finger, he took the other's hand, placing it in Kouta's palm before curling his fingers around it.
“I'm sorry...” Kouta murmured, his fingers tightening around the warm metal.
Yuya shook his head, still smiling that little sad smile. “Don't be. I just... Thinking about it, I'm not ready for this... for you, anyway.” It felt like giving up, and Yuya hated that. But with everything that had happened, Yuya realized how things had changed since that fight. He still cared a lot about Kouta and a part of him would always love him... but he knew that maybe they had to let go to move forward.
Kouta's expression was an unreadable mix of emotions, but the smile he gave was genuine. “I'm proud of you, Yuya,” he whispered, laying the white rose in Yuya's fingers. There were words left unsaid in the air between them, like wishes that had no star to be wished upon.
I'll miss you.
I'll always be by your side.
I'm sorry.
I love you.
---
[A new beginning - Tokyo Dome]
“Are you ready?” Junta asked, giving the other two boys a once over, double checking for any possible wardrobe or technological malfunctions.
Akito was shifting from side to side, peeking out the tunnel they'd be ducking through to enter the stage. The unending noises of the waiting crowd had him grinning, and he twitched away from Junta. “C'mon, Junta...” he laughed. “We're fine! It's almost time, will you stop being a mother hen?”
Junta rolled his eyes good-naturedly as the other boy and turned to Yuya, nudging him gently. “Yuya... you ready?”
Yuya had been staring off in the direction of the stage and snapped back to attention at the sound of his name. “Mm?” He gave Junta a bright smile. “Roger that.”
They stood at the entrance, waiting, letting the intro music get the fans roused in expectation. Yuya held his breath, feeling his heart pound in his throat. At either side, a warm hand took his, and Junta and Akito smiled at him. He couldn't help but smile back as he refocused.
Dreams had a strange way of coming true, he decided as they ran onto the stage, fingers still linked, Akito screaming at the crowd to make some noise.
But he wouldn't trade where he was for the world.
It wasn't the end, just a new beginning.
_______________________________________________
A/N: My original piece for the games. I seriously cried over this and convinced at least three of my friends that I was going insane. In the end, I'm not completely satisfied with this but I do like it. Team What-If was a very difficult team to write for.