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Game of Thrones pocky_slash October 21 2011, 01:17:58 UTC
Like Dungeons & Dragons, only there's no monsters, all the players are jerks, and the GM is a colossal dillhole.

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Re: Game of Thrones ilovetakahana October 21 2011, 13:57:21 UTC
"Hey, if it's going to be a game of which one of us is unluckiest I think I ought to win the prize," Jon Snow muttered, face-down on the forest floor with multiple knives sticking out of his back.

"And what prize can make up for me looking like this," Daenerys Targaryen muttered, looking down at her blood-soaked hands and lap.

"Oh you think you have it bad. You know what, FUCK off," Tyrion Lannister muttered, and he smacked first Jon, then Dany, on the backs of their heads before getting on Dany's dragon and flying off - with considerable difficulty.

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Re: Game of Thrones dark_roast October 21 2011, 16:41:36 UTC
*trying to smother my laughter at work*

This is amazing. Truly.

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Re: Game of Thrones kindness_says October 22 2011, 19:07:03 UTC
Oh my god, BEST.

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Re: Game of Thrones gigi_tastic October 22 2011, 22:30:59 UTC
someone needs to breed shorter dragons. Its hard for us short people to get on with dignity intact.

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Re: Game of Thrones resolute October 22 2011, 01:19:55 UTC
Jamie Lannister strode through the halls with the confidence his rank and breeding bestowed. If only everyone respected him for all he was worth! Soon they would, especially when he teamed up with the dragon princess.

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Re: Game of Thrones likeadeuce October 22 2011, 06:41:23 UTC
Oooh, I wish.

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Re: Game of Thrones resolute October 23 2011, 01:04:47 UTC
You're saying that's *not* the plot of ASoFaI?

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Re: Game of Thrones likeadeuce October 23 2011, 01:07:18 UTC
No sign of Jaime + dragon princess yet but you never know.

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House of Stark entwashian October 22 2011, 02:00:46 UTC
"I think we should have sex," Sansa Stark said to Jon Snow.

Jon sadfaced. "But we have the same father!"

Sansa frowned, too. "I know, I know, it's only half, but it should be alright. If I'm to be queen someday, I really need to get a leg up on this apparently requisite incest thing."

Jon cringed in horror.

"Besides," Sansa continued, "with my father and little brother dead and all, I'm kind of running out of options here."

"But you're just a child!" Jon exclaimed.

"I'm an old, engaged woman now," Sansa contradicted, starting to unbutton her dress.

Jon began to cry harder than he had when his pet wolf died.

"Sh, there, there. I know exactly what you're feeling," Sansa said soothingly. "My wolf died, too."

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Re: House of Stark kindness_says October 22 2011, 19:07:37 UTC
Pretty much... Although I have not seen this particular ship yet, I don't think!

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Re: House of Stark gigi_tastic October 22 2011, 22:30:00 UTC
BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Sansa frowned, too. "I know, I know, it's only half, but it should be alright. If I'm to be queen someday, I really need to get a leg up on this apparently requisite incest thing."

THIS.

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Re: Game of Thrones harmonyangel October 23 2011, 18:59:17 UTC
One day Jaime Lannister fought a bear. And it was awesome.

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Re: Game of Thrones likeadeuce October 23 2011, 19:01:47 UTC
That is not just the 'good part version' that is the 'BEST PART VERSION.'

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Re: Game of Thrones harmonyangel October 23 2011, 19:07:18 UTC
All I could think to add was, "But then he was sad, because no one would let him go home to sleep with his sister and he couldn't sleep with the virgin knight lady, either. At least the bear gave him some action."

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Re: Game of Thrones likeadeuce October 23 2011, 19:08:13 UTC
That is INCREDIBLY ACCURATE.

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