(no subject)

[onezeronothing]

• What sort of profession in the wizarding world would you choose and why? It’s not listed as profession, and if it is, I’ve never seen it represented in canon, however, no society can really exist without it. I’d want to be in research, preferably something tedious that no one else wants to do, because that’s where the most prestige is. Private vs. Government sector would depend, for me, what the actual research is. I think I’d be more likely to do less savoury research for the government because it would be easier to say, if anything goes wrong, “I didn’t know what I was helping to develop.” I kind of see myself drifting towards Potions because I tend to be bad at things that require action at that moment not including something like, “Oh Gods! The house is on fire!“ but very good at things that require fore planning and thought.
  
  
• If you could teach one class at Hogwarts, what would it be and why? Something I could do while drunk, mainly because I read that question as “If everything went wrong in your life and you had to sell your soul to the education system to survive, what class would you want to teach?” I think it would be safe to say, to protect the low mortality rate, that I shouldn’t teach Potions, Herbology, Care of Magical Creatures, Defense Against the Dark Arts, Flying, Charms or Transfiguration. Which leaves me with Divination, a course I wouldn’t even bother to show up for, Ancient Runes, Muggle Studies, Astronomy and Arthimancy. Astronomy… I would cancel class every day so I wouldn’t have to deal with students on a roof, where I know I’d be plotting to throw someone off. I’m too lazy for Muggle Studies. Every class I’d just say, “Go find a Muggle-born, hug them and ask them about ___, then write a report that I won’t read.” From what I understand of them, Ancient Runes and Arthimancy seem to be very book heavy classes where the answer to all the problems is two or three digits long. So yes, I’d teach one of those. I’m not including History of Magic because there’s no canon evidence of exorcisms.
  
  
• This year, The TriWizard Tournament is being held once again and you're of age. Do you put your name in the Goblet? Why or why not? I’m not the hugest fan of public humiliation and possible death, especially not in the name of “glory”, which I’m sure can be obtained in less painful ways. If I was sure that I couldn’t possibly be chosen, then I’d put my name, just so I can say I did, and maybe lord it over people I don’t like who were too cowardly to put their names in. Now, if there was a chance I’d be chosen, I would get “sick” until the time when one could put their name in has expired, because then I could say, “Hey, you know, I really wanted to but Pomfrey wouldn’t let me out of the hospital wing. Damn my accidentally severed leg.”
  
  
• If you could choose your animagus form, what would it be and why? It would be some form of higher canine. I’m tempted to say wolf or werewolf, because that’s where my primary animalistic obsession lies. If a wolf, it would be a black wolf, because they’re generally outcasted from their society. Outcasts have a sort of nothing to lose temperament that I’m prone to adapting. A sort of desperate version of “Go big or go home.” Plus, and I recently found out that this is considered odd amongst our species, I really do rely on my sense of smell a lot. I like to smell things. If someone smells odd to me, I’ll avoid them. If I pick up a book at the library or bookstore and it doesn’t smell right, I won’t bring it home. I really believe in my sense of smell. I think, because of that, I’m constantly attacked by “Phantom smells”, which, like phantom sights and sounds are things that you see / hear / smell that no one else does. I think it’s me connecting with my higher form. My mom thinks it’s my subconscious saying I need a therapist.
  
  
• What HP character do you identify with most and why? Only one? Can I do two? For sake of not fangirling?
  
  1) I like Tom Riddle, not Felton. There’s a lot of talk about him being racist, but I don’t really see it in him. I mean, the only real example we have of him killing a muggleborn was Lily and he offered her a chance to live. Everything else were heresy. That whole him killing his father’s family… It’s not like anyone can actually claim they weren’t tempted, at least once, to brutally murder their parents. Though I’ve found few people that believe, as I do, that Dumbledore was responsible, at least in the sense that he saw it coming and willingly did nothing, for Tom falling into darkness, I stand by the fact that it’s a plausible theory. I see Tom’s actions, the people he deems an enemy vs. the ones he allows to ally themselves to him as less racism and more open contempt and spite for Dumbledore. I don’t think Tom ever got over the fact that Dumbledore wouldn’t allow him to become a teacher at the only home he had ever known and I really do believe that that was one of the things that motivated him further into darkness. Why do I think that? Because I can easily see myself doing the same thing. Spite does funny things to people. Some get over it, some feel a great need to takeover the world. I would be in the latter group.
  
  Also, from what we saw of Tom as a child, that was me, though I didn’t actively bully anyone. I did enjoy taking trinkets from other people, hiding them away and then watching as the other person frantically looked for it. Sometimes I’d even offer to help and internally laugh at the fact that I’m helping them. Tom becoming a prefect and later opening a chamber, which we have yet to see evidence that it was intentional… if I were in his position, I would have blamed someone else too. I mean saying, “Hey, I accidentally opened a secret chamber under the school and released a basilisk that killed a muggleborn girl.” probably isn’t the best way to get the Headmaster to agree for a summer sleepover.
  
  2) I feel, for some reason I can’t really understand, a connection with Remus. I understand him greatly though I have yet to suffer his loss. I can see how he’s happy and how he’s depressed. How he’s aged from who he was to who he became. Remus’ life is cloaked in secrets. He’s a werewolf and no one knows. He’s gay and no one knows. Granted I’m neither, but I constantly feel like I have to hide my inner nature from others. Remus and I, once we meet someone that knows our secret, it’s like finding social heaven. There’s a certain loyalty allotted to someone that you can be yourself with when you know the rest of the world would turn against you. Remus is the only character that I honestly wish wasn’t fictional, because I would want to befriend him.
  
  
• What would you see if you looked into the Mirror of Erised? Me. With money and my PhD. My family and close friends behind me, safe and relatively content. I’d be wearing a lab coat with either the NASA emblem or the CDC emblem, I don’t really desire a mate at this point, so I doubt they would be there, but after time when the urge to procreate consumes my thoughts, I’m sure the image in the mirror will change to reflect the above but with some form of offspring.
  
  
• If you won a million dollars, how would you spend it? The first thing I would do is pop Barenaked Ladies song, If I had a million dollars, into my CD player. Actually, I’d buy a CD player and then do the above. At which point I’d mock their love of Kraft dinner and go shopping. I’d put half of my money, right off the back, into stocks. I’d put a fourth into bonds and mutual funds then use the rest to make me, my mother, my sister, my niece and my brother very very happy. I think I’d live a year or so like that, at which point I’d empty my stock account, distribute the money in various national and world banks before putting another half a million into stocks. Then there would be and anyone willing doing a lot of travelling. I’m a firm believer in the one person theory, “You only need one person in your life… someone to report you missing in the first 24 hours.” so I would pay for the first person to come with me, like all expense paid and here’s some money for you to shop kind of pay. Anyone else will depend on how fond I am of them at the moment.
  
  And, for sake of karma and disdain for the way they were treated, I’d donate a vast sum of money to helping the victims of Katrina. And then some to the families of UK scientists that lose their life every year because of animal research. Really, you would not believe how differently the US and UK view animal research. I mean the US has the P.E.T.A. people to completely discredit any animal rights activists (“I believe the life of an ant should have the same consideration as my son!”) but they… don’t. I’ve heard stories. And they weren’t funny.
  
  
• What was your ideal job as a kid? Has that changed? What is your ideal job now? I wanted to be a washing machine. But I was a child in the 80’s, back when you couldn’t change your gender, let alone your life form. So once I realized nothing short of an accident at a nuclear power plant was going to get me turned into a large metal object, I switched dreams to a ballet-dancing-fire-fighting-veterinarian. At which point I realized two things; 1) I have no balance and 2) I’m a pyromaniac. So there went that dream, minus the veterinarian part, which kind of vanished when someone asked me “If a cow was sick, what would you do?” and I replied, “Sick to the point where you can’t eat it? Or just sick and annoying?”, so they said, “Annoying.” and I said, “Shoot it and have steak for dinner.”. Then I realized that I would make a horrible vet. So I spent a good decade or so confused about my future, then I fell in love with science. So now I’m aiming for microbiology, preferably with a job at NASA or the Center for Disease Control and later the World Health Organization. I’m going to be in school until I’m menopausal but I will get all the right PhDs.
  
  
• If you were able to invent one spell, potion, or charm, what would it do, what would you use it for or how would you use it, and what would you call it?Empatico. It would allow you, based on your experience to feel the emotions of all the people in X-amount of space. I’d gamble. Like a dog. Earn some money off people that don’t know I can tell when they’re nervous. Then I’d use the money to start a matchmaking service. Lust, I’m sure, is an easy emotion to identify, much like desperation. I’d make a fortune of other people’s misfortunes. I would then use that money to buy my very own South American cocaine plantation. Because that’s just what people with money do.
  
  
• If you were to face a boggart, what would it turn into? And what does it turn into when you throw the counter-spell, Riddikulus? Me, without a brain, literally. Kind of like a victim of a zombie with a chainsaw. I don’t really like the ideal of me not being able to think for myself and possibly outsmart the majority of people in my vicinity. I don’t really see a way that could be made funny with Riddikulus, maybe the open flap that once held my brain would flap around a bit? Plus I’d be far too busy screaming in abject fear and terror to cast the spell, so what it would look like is a moot point.
  
  
• What do you look for in a friend? A sense of humour, preferably one that meshes well with mine. I can put up with a lot if the person makes me laugh. I’m willing to tolerate all lesser forms of bigotry for a good laugh, this is assuming the bigot in question doesn’t know that I’m laughing about them behind their back, because that’s just the sort of thing that destroys friendships.
  
  
• What trait most annoys you about other people? Weakness. I really cannot stand people that don’t have the mental strength to stand up for themselves. They’re social parasites, clinging to stronger life forms and hoping for a free ride. They fill me with a homicidal rage that is too often denied. It really does bother me though, when someone needs a group to stand up for themselves. I know that some people are just really social but if you’re willing to say something when you have a group behind you, then you should be willing to say it when you stand alone. If you can’t do that, there’s almost nothing that can be done to renew yourself in my eyes. I will consider them trash and unworthy of my presence.
  
  
• What do you think are your top five abilities or qualities? I’m polite, always, witty, sardonic, mellow and accepting of anyone that proves that posses any form of intellect. I don’t really know how to further explain those. I am willing to get a dictionary and then write a three paragraph definition of each that reflects on how it affects my daily life… however…
  
  
• What do you think are your top five weaknesses or worst qualities? There’s no such thing as a weakness or a bad qualities. Those few who call me cold have yet to see me in an emergency. The fact that I don’t allow things to emotionally affect me when they first occur makes me invaluable in a crisis. I’ve been called petty but once people know that I can, and will, stoop to their level, they’re less likely to go places they don’t want me to follow. It’s good for everyone because it gets the truly annoying people to bother someone else. I’ve been told sarcasm is bad, I have yet to see how. I think it’s the best thing since fire. That’s… three. Let’s see. I can be a bit defensive but that’s not bad when it’s a known trait. Because if people know that I’m willing to bite before I bark, they’re less likely to approach me in the first place. I’m indecisive, which, once coupled with procrastination, puts me in a position where I can’t possibly over think anything, thus ensuring that I go with my first instinct, which is more often than not, correct.
  
  
• Define in your own words the following key traits:
  
  • Courage: Courage is the ability to quickly assess risk and take the option that involves a greater potential for a negative result. Anyone can hide, very few can stay and stand.
    
    
  • Loyalty: Loyalty is when someone has control over some part of you which forces you to remain in their debt far longer than anyone else. Like with me and Remus, the person that knows our secret would offer us, unknowingly, sanctuary from our lies, that’s addictive and everyone is a little controlling.
    
    
  • Intelligence: Intelligence is knowing what to do and when to do it coupled with the accumulation of various facts. It's the ability to process information and use it in more than one forum, ie. reading about Darwinism and being able to apply it to marketing.
    
    
  • Ambition: Ambition is knowing how far the other guy will go to reach the goal you want and being willing to beat him by a single step. It’s knowing that, at the end of the day, you’ll be the one that pushed yourself to get what you want while everyone else collapsed just short of the finish line.
    
  
  
• Name: Ilujna / Nugatory
  
• Age: 21
  
• Where did you find out about us? laynie left a message on my journal after noticing that I had joined the elite ranks of those who had the courage to sign up, and be squibbed by, Hogwarts_elite edited to fix broken tags