other people's misery

[plantgirl]

A small study on our perception of other people's positive & negative experiences starts out thusly...

"Have you ever had the feeling that everyone else seems so sorted, so at ease? You look about you and see friends chatting over lunch, people laughing on their mobiles, others escaping contentedly through novels or newspapers. According to

Comments

[redzils]

I've heard this talked about as "comparing your insides to other people's outsides" - it's hard to resist, but doesn't get you anywhere as this notes.

[plantgirl]

What a great way of phrasing it!

[rhiannonstone]

I've also heard, specifically with regard to the perception of other people's happiness via social networking, "comparing your behind-the-scenes to everyone else's highlight reels."

[onetarot]

Although I maintain that we strongly tend to remember our own negative episodes and forget the positive ones.

[plantgirl]

We do. Studies show that we weight the extremes, both positive & negative, much too heavily when we file & retrieve memories. This causes poor decision making.

Two books on the subject, each of which I loved, & which might interest you - forgive me I'm just going to toss titles at you & not provide authors or links just now...
The Seven Sins of Memory
Stumbling on Happiness

The second book actually references the works cited in the first book in several places, so they pair up well. :)