Chapter 10: The Cabin in the Woods - part 2
Late Night Auto Musings
Dean’s mind churned with all the emotional truths that had been laid bare between the three of them that evening. He wasn’t angry with Cas. That was the truth of the matter. He was pretty sure he would forgive Cas. In fact, if he was honest with himself, he already had. It had happened the moment he’d healed Sam’s crazy.
Driving the backroads of Montana he found himself thinking about what exactly Cas meant to him. It bothered him that there was a presumption of something more intimate than friendship between them. Cas labeling their friendship a ‘profound bond’ did not help. Especially since Sam was the witness and delighted in not so subtle hints about it. Dean wondered if that particular bug was killed along with Sam’s crazy.
“Nah, couldn’t be that lucky,” Dean thought and turned the music up. AC/DC blared and howled about being ‘Dirty Deeds’. “Yeah, that seems to be the assumption.” Dean said aloud, smiling at the irony and sang along.
The question was why? Dean could, sort of, understand that because Cas had raised him from perdition and used some of his grace to repair and renew Dean’s body, giving him a literal ‘divine connection’, that some might think that made them more than brothers-in-arms.
Cas was always in his personal space and the only one allowed that was Sam and okay, so, Dean didn’t hissy fit about that anymore. He just reminded Cas about ‘personal space’ and the angel would step back. Cas answered his ‘calls’ but he also answered Sam or Bobby and it wasn’t like Cas lived in his ass.
Dean felt protective towards Cas, the same way he was protective towards Sam. Cas for his part returned that protective feeling. Dean had lost count of the ways, both big and small, that Cas had helped him keep his sanity throughout these last years.
Perhaps this was where the presumption came from Dean figured. Cas might be a powerful supernatural angel of the Lord but he was a baby in a trenchcoat where all things human were concerned. Besides, when all was said and done, Dean just couldn’t imagine Cas being physically intimate with anyone male or female. Their pitiful bordello visit proved that.
***
Once back at Rufus’s cabin. Dean made himself some coffee and sat listening to the silence, broken only by Sam snoring and the occasional owl hooting. He looked around the cabin. It was a good enough place to live, but it wasn’t home. Not in the way Bobby’s had been home. There had been so much lost this last two years and not just physically.
He took up a piece of paper and started thinking about and writing down what he wanted and expected from life. Not what life and others expected from him. He’d deal with the Leviathan but he wanted more than just endless hunting the supernatural.
When Sam woke up the following morning, Dean was sprawled out on the sofa the paper in his outstretched hand. Sam gently took it from his grip and read it. He looked at his sleeping brother and smiled. He made a few notes of his own. Then set about making them some breakfast.
Dean’s list.
- Kill Leviathan
- Get ‘Baby’ back on the road.
- Rebuild Singer Salvage - it’s our home. Move Campbell Library there?
- Get Sam back to college or some work other than hunting.
- Find a new hunting partner?
Sam’s revised list.
- Kill Leviathan
- Get ‘Baby’ back on the road.
- Rebuild Singer Salvage - it’s our home. Move Campbell Library there? (complete with panic room)
- Get Sam back to college or some work other than hunting. (no thanks. I’ll just do Bobby’s job -do already)
- Find a new hunting partner? (I’m not going and even if I was nobody would partner with you)
Dean woke up the smell of freshly brewed coffee and bacon. After washing his face and using the toilet, he sat down at the table and read Sam’s revised list and smiled.
“I mean it, Dean. I’m not going anywhere. So, maybe our life isn’t what we would’ve had. Maybe, there are things I’d still like to do outside of hunting. I don’t need to be out of the family business to do that. We kill Dick. We’ll sort the rest out. Okay?” Sam said, looking up from his plate of food.
“I know Sam. Believe it or not, I know. That’s part of the reason I want to rebuild the yard. Outside hunting, stripping down or fixing up the wrecks around Bobby’s place is the only thing I like. Besides, I really don’t want to be doing this job at Bobby’s age.” Dean said. It was the most honest and heartfelt thing his brother had said in a long time. So naturally, Sam had to mess with him.
“Oh, I don’t know Dean, worse things might happen. You might meet a woman, settle down, have 2.5 kids a mortgage and health care.” Sam said smiling, “Unless Balthazar was right all along and you and Cas shack-up. I’m sure Wen wouldn’t have a problem with you living at her old home, complete with garage.”
“I just might do that…” Dean teased back and grinned outright at Sam’s double take. He could almost hear Sam’s thoughts. “What! No? Surely not… oh right, pranked, jerk.” Sam glared at Dean, who laughed and continued to speak.
“…If some woman was insane enough to have me it wouldn’t happen till after having seen you graduate and take the bar. Then, I’ll have to wait until some swanky law firm hires your ass and you can pay me back for all the years my humble hustler self, paid for your studies.” Dean said with a laugh. Sam joined in the laughter this time.
“So, guess we’d better call Cas.” Sam said after they’d finished breakfast. Dean nodded dialled the number Wen had given them.
part 3