From the Ashes (Karisverse Story 1 Part 1)
Here is part 1 of my From the Ashes Story. It takes place in the Karisverse that I created.
Title: From the Ashes
Author: pink_glitter_26 aka Faith Monroe
Rating: G to R
Pairing: Kris/Adam
Warnings:
Disclaimer: I do not own Adam or Kris. This story is purely fictional.
Summary: From the ashes of love, a new love and family will form.
Author’s Notes: I have posted this story before. However, I think I deleted the previous entries. I wanted to repost it in its entirety and with the many errors that I found when reading it again fixed. I hope you enjoy it. I am working on a sequel to it.
One minute, Kris Allen was on top of the world watching his wife deliver their beautiful baby girl. The next everything was crashing down around him. He couldn’t believe what the doctors were telling him. Katy was hemorrhaging. They needed to rush her into emergency surgery. From there, everything was a blur. Vaguely, he remembered a nurse handing him his daughter. He sat in the rocking chair and cradled her to his chest. He stared straight ahead and let tears fall from his cheeks onto his daughter’s head.
Sometime later, he registered Adam walking into the room. Kris always knew when Adam entered a room. He didn’t have to see him or hear him to know he was there. Slowly, he looked over at his best friend and the tears started falling harder. Without hesitation, Adam marched across the room and took the baby from Kris’ arms. He placed her in the nearby basinet and then returned to pull his friend into one of his famous hugs. He didn’t say anything to Kris. There was nothing that he could have said to make Kris feel any better anyway. All Kris needed was to know that he wasn’t alone…that his best friend was there for him.
When the doctor returned with the news that Katy hadn’t made it, Kris broke down. He fell to his knees on the floor and sobbed. Adam dropped down beside him and just held him as tears streamed down his face as well.
The days that followed were a haze of friends and family converging on Kris’ house. Everyone was sorry and grieving and Kris was just numb. He went through the motions as best as he could. Adam was there throughout the whole ordeal. While Kris took care of his daughter, who he still hadn’t named, Adam took care of Kris making sure that he ate and slept. Kris didn’t feel like doing much of anything. He knew that he should be strong for his daughter, but he just couldn’t find the power. His life had been ripped out from under him and he didn’t know how to get back to normal. He had had plans and dreams with Katy and now none of that would ever happen. So while he fell apart, his best friend was his strength. He gave him the space he needed and listened when he rambled on about life being unfair. He ushered people in and out of the house. He helped take care of the baby by making bottles, changing diapers, and singing lullabies. Kris and Katy’s family were there to help as well, but they were grieving too and not sure how to help.
On the day of the funeral, Adam sat beside Kris and held his hand throughout the service. Later that evening, after everyone had left, Kris watched from the doorway of the nursery, as Adam sang his daughter to sleep. His heart broke because it was supposed to be Katy that he watched. His heart also filled with love for his best friend who had been his rock for the last week and for his daughter who would insure that Katy lived on.
“Thank you.” Kris stated when Adam walked out of the nursery a few minutes later. He wrapped his arms around Adam in a tight embrace which Adam returned.
“No thanks are necessary, Kris. We’re best friends and that’s what best friends do for one another.” Adam responded as he moved away from Kris.
“I think that you’ve gone above and beyond what most friends would do for one another and I really appreciate that. You’re friendship means a lot to me.”
“And yours means a lot to me. I would do anything for you.” Adam replied as he leaned down and gently placed a kiss on Kris’ forehead.
“You’re really good with the baby. I know that I haven’t been but I’m going to do better.” Kris spoke as he pulled the nursery door closed and they headed downstairs.
“Speaking of the baby, I think that it’s high time that you gave her a proper name. Everyone goes around calling her the baby or baby girl or sweetie or precious or something, but she needs a real name.” Adam told him as they entered the kitchen.
“I know that, but I’m having a hard time thinking of something.” Kris replied as he took a seat at the kitchen table.
“Didn’t you and Katy pick anything out together?” Adam inquired as he set about the kitchen making them some hot tea.
“No…Katy didn’t want to pick anything out. She said that we would know the right name for her when she was born, but I’m totally clueless.” Kris admitted.
“Alright…Well, I could help you pick out something if you want.” Adam said as he placed a cup of tea in front of Kris and sat down across from him with his own tea in hand.
“You would do that?” Kris asked as he looked up at his best friend.
“Like I said, I would do anything for you and for that little girl for that matter. I couldn’t stand the thought of her being called baby for the rest of her life. It might be cute now, but when she’s a teenager she’s going to hate you for it.”
“Point taken. We won’t go to bed tonight until she has a name.”
“Good. I think I saw a baby name book on the shelf in the living room. I’ll get and we can get to work.” Adam smiled at his friend and left the room to retrieve the book.
A minute or so later, Adam returned with the book. He pulled his chair over and sat beside Kris at the table. Kris opened the book to the girls’ names section and they began to pour over it. A lot of names were selected and then discarded for being too old-fashioned, too popular, too eccentric, or not different enough.
“That’s it!” Kris exclaimed pointing to a name on the page.
“What?” Adam inquired trying to see what name his friend was pointing at.
“Karis…It’s perfect. It starts with a K and combines my name with Katy’s.” Kris explained triumphantly with his first smile in days.
“It’s beautiful.” Adam replied as he beamed back at his friend.
“Karis Leila Allen.” Kris spoke his daughter’s name for the first time. He liked the way it sounded.
“Leila…That’s…that’s uh…my…my mom’s name.” Adam stated getting a little choked up.
“I know…You’ve been so great through all of this…and not just Katy’s death. For the last two years, you’ve been my best friend through every up and down imaginable. I want my daughter to have a name that honors you. Katy would have wanted that too.” Kris clarified.
“Well, I am honored and my mom will be as well.” Adam responded trying to hold back the tears that were threatening to fall.
“Well, picking her name was the easy part compared to everything else that I’m going to have to do and decide. I have to figure out how I’m going to raise Karis alone.” Kris told him as he got up from the table and took their cups to the sink.
“You aren’t alone. You have your family…and Katy’s family…” Adam began.
“Yeah, but they’re in Arkansas, so unless I give up my life and career here and move back home, they aren’t going to be a lot of help. I mean I know that they’re going to be around and do whatever they can and I want that, but I couldn’t ask any of them to give up the lives that they have in Arkansas for me and Karis. I’ll figure it out. I’m taking time off from the career for now. When I’m ready to go back to work, I’ll hire a nanny or something.”
“You and Karis always have me.” Adam told him as he joined him by the sink.
“What are you going to give up your career and be Karis’ nanny?” Kris asked with a laugh.
“I would do that if it was necessary...But what I mean is you and Karis could come stay with me. I have plenty of room and I’m also taking a break right now. Once you get things figured out, we can decide what the next step is.” Adam explained.
“Really? You’d do all of that for me and Karis.” Kris paused a moment and looked at Adam. “Of course you would because you’re Adam.”
“Kris, I…”
“Adam, it’s wonderful of you to offer, but it’s too much to ask of you. It’s too big of a sacrifice for you to make.” Kris responded with tears nearly falling. Adam never ceased to amaze him with his generosity. He knew that he was lucky to have Adam in his life and so was his daughter.
“It wouldn’t be a sacrifice. You’re my best friend and I love you guys.” Adam told his friend. He could see the resistance in his eyes. “Listen, just think about it okay and know that I’m here for you whatever you need.”
“Thanks, man.” Kris replied as he gave Adam a hug.
“It’s getting late. I should be going so you can get some rest.” Adam declared as he moved away from Kris. “Unless you want me to stay again tonight.”
“No…I’ll be fine. I need to get used to being alone.” Kris replied with sadness.
“I’m only a phone call away.” Adam told him as he headed for the door.
When Adam got home and climbed into bed, all he could do was toss and turn. He had about a million thoughts running through his head. He was worried about Kris. He was worried about Karis. He was trying to quiet the feelings that were stirring inside of him.
It was no secret that Adam had been crushing on Kris ever since meeting on American Idol. Adam had crushed on straight boys before and he always ended up heartbroken. Despite all of this, Adam and Kris had become the best of friends. Over time, Adam’s crush had dissipated and he had become great friends with Katy as well. Adam was happy to just be friends with Kris. When Kris told him that he and Katy were having a baby, he had been excited to be “Uncle” Adam. He had just gotten off a flight from New York City when he got word that Katy had gone into labor. He headed straight to the hospital even though he was dead tired. He wanted to see his best friend and his new niece. Just before he arrived at the hospital, he received word that Katy had been rushed into emergency surgery. When he walked into the hospital room and saw his best friend so broken, all he wanted to do was take away the pain. He knew that wasn’t possible, so for the last several days he’d been doing everything he could to help out. As a matter of fact, this was the first night since arriving back in L.A. that he had been in his own bed. He had been sleeping on Kris’ couch.
Mostly, what was running through his head and keeping him from some much needed sleep was the fact that his crush on Kris was seeping back into his heart. He didn’t want to have these feelings. He knew that they wouldn’t be returned. He didn’t want to lose his best friend or his “uncle” status to Karis over feelings that he couldn’t control no matter how much he tried. He didn’t want to be heartbroken, but he didn’t know how else this was going to end.
Even though his feelings for Kris were growing, he had meant it when he told him they could move in with him. He knew that he was playing with fire and that he was delusional. However, he thought that just having Kris around would be enough for him.
“Fucking crazy idiot!” Adam scolded himself as he threw back the covers and sat on the edge of his bed. “He just lost his wife…He’s straight. He’s your fucking best friend for God’s sake.”
Just as he was about to go get a shower, he heard the doorbell ring. It was almost midnight. He had no idea would it could be. He hoped that it was Kris.
When he got downstairs and looked out the window, he saw Kris standing there. He had Karis in her car seat in one hand and a duffel bag in the other. Adam opened the door and just looked at his friend. Finally, he stepped aside and allowed him to come in.
“The house just seemed so empty. Karis and I couldn’t stay there.” Kris explained as he sat the car seat and bag down.
“You’re always welcome here…You know that.” Adam told him.
“I was hoping that you hadn’t changed your mind. Anyway, it’s just for a little while until we find a new place. I can’t live in that house anymore. I see Katy everywhere I look. I mean it was her dream house. I need to find mine and Karis’ dream house.” Kris continued.
“You and Karis stay as long as you like…as long as you need.” Adam replied as he bent down to remove the half asleep baby from the car seat.
“Thanks, Adam. I still have a few things in the car. I’ll be right back.” Kris announced as he headed back out the door.
Adam cradled Karis to his chest as he watched Kris walk out the door.
“Oh, baby girl, what have I gotten myself into?” Adam questioned softly as he dropped a kiss on her head.
Six months later, Kris and Karis were still living with Adam. They had moved in everything that Kris wanted from his house and then he had sold Katy’s dream home. So far, Kris hadn’t tried to find another place. Adam wasn’t complaining though. He loved having Kris and Karis at his place. They had fallen into a nice routine. It felt right for the three of them to be together. Adam could pretend that he had what he wanted. However, in the back of his mind, he knew that it was destined to come crashing down around him.
Around the fifth month mark, the nightmares started. Adam thought that Kris had been dealing pretty well with Katy’s death. However, their anniversary was approaching and suddenly Kris started having nightmares. The first one had woken Adam up from a deep sleep. He had rushed to Kris’ side and comforted him. Kris never told him what the nightmares were about, but they got worse. Kris would creep into Adam’s room in the middle of the night with tears streaming down his face and his body shaking. Adam would pull up the covers, scoot over, and Kris would climb in. They wouldn’t talk and Adam would just hold him until he went back to sleep. Of course, this new situation did nothing to help Adam get over his feelings for Kris. If anything, it strengthened them. After a straight month of nightmares, it got to the point that Kris couldn’t even sleep unless he was in Adam’s bed. This led to a whole new problem. At first, Adam and Kris would wake up on different sides of the bed. Lately, however, Adam would wake up with Kris wrapped around him or pressed up against him. Some mornings, he would allow himself a few moments to enjoy the feeling of Kris so close. Those mornings inevitably led to a shower where he imagined all the things that he wanted to do to Kris while he touched himself.
After about a month or so of sharing Adam’s bed, Kris announced that he was going to see a therapist. Adam was glad that his friend was going to get some help because the nightmares had only gotten worse.
“How did your first session go?” Adam inquired from the chair where he was giving Karis her bottle.
“It went well. It was easier to talk to her than I thought it would be. I felt so good after that I stopped by the real estate agency that I used to sell the house and talked to them about finding a new place.” Kris told him as he took Karis and continued to feed her.
“That’s great.” Adam lied trying to hide the hurt in his voice and on his face.
“You’ve been great, but I just figured that it was time that Karis and I gave you your space back. I feel like we’ve been cramping your style for the last few months.” Kris explained as he made funny faces at his daughter.
“I’ve loved having both of you here. Don’t feel rushed. Take your time and find the perfect place for you and Karis.” Adam spoke.
“Thanks, Adam…for everything.”
“No problem…Listen, I’m actually going to head out for awhile. I’m meeting the band at Tommy’s. We’re going to jam…maybe write a song.” Adam said as he headed for the door.
“Okay…See you when you get home.” Kris responded as he tried to burp Karis.
When Adam got to his car, he just sat there for a few minutes. He knew that it was going to end, but he hadn’t been ready for it to happen yet. He didn’t want Kris to leave and he knew that was completely selfish, but it didn’t change how he felt.
“Maybe I should see a therapist.” Adam told himself as he started the engine and drove away.
Adam had expected things to really change after Kris’ announcement. However, when he returned from Tommy’s that night; Kris was sleeping in his bed. He sighed, stripped down, and climbed into bed. Kris woke up about half and cuddled up to Adam.
“Did you have a good time?” Kris questioned sleepily as he threw his arm over Adam’s chest.
“Yeah.” Adam breathed.
“Good.” Kris whispered before falling back to sleep.
Adam lay awake for a long time afterwards. It was killing him to be this close to Kris, to have these feelings for him and not be able to do anything about it.
Title: From the Ashes
Author: pink_glitter_26 aka Faith Monroe
Rating: G to R
Pairing: Kris/Adam
Warnings:
Disclaimer: I do not own Adam or Kris. This story is purely fictional.
Summary: From the ashes of love, a new love and family will form.
Author’s Notes: I have posted this story before. However, I think I deleted the previous entries. I wanted to repost it in its entirety and with the many errors that I found when reading it again fixed. I hope you enjoy it. I am working on a sequel to it.
One minute, Kris Allen was on top of the world watching his wife deliver their beautiful baby girl. The next everything was crashing down around him. He couldn’t believe what the doctors were telling him. Katy was hemorrhaging. They needed to rush her into emergency surgery. From there, everything was a blur. Vaguely, he remembered a nurse handing him his daughter. He sat in the rocking chair and cradled her to his chest. He stared straight ahead and let tears fall from his cheeks onto his daughter’s head.
Sometime later, he registered Adam walking into the room. Kris always knew when Adam entered a room. He didn’t have to see him or hear him to know he was there. Slowly, he looked over at his best friend and the tears started falling harder. Without hesitation, Adam marched across the room and took the baby from Kris’ arms. He placed her in the nearby basinet and then returned to pull his friend into one of his famous hugs. He didn’t say anything to Kris. There was nothing that he could have said to make Kris feel any better anyway. All Kris needed was to know that he wasn’t alone…that his best friend was there for him.
When the doctor returned with the news that Katy hadn’t made it, Kris broke down. He fell to his knees on the floor and sobbed. Adam dropped down beside him and just held him as tears streamed down his face as well.
The days that followed were a haze of friends and family converging on Kris’ house. Everyone was sorry and grieving and Kris was just numb. He went through the motions as best as he could. Adam was there throughout the whole ordeal. While Kris took care of his daughter, who he still hadn’t named, Adam took care of Kris making sure that he ate and slept. Kris didn’t feel like doing much of anything. He knew that he should be strong for his daughter, but he just couldn’t find the power. His life had been ripped out from under him and he didn’t know how to get back to normal. He had had plans and dreams with Katy and now none of that would ever happen. So while he fell apart, his best friend was his strength. He gave him the space he needed and listened when he rambled on about life being unfair. He ushered people in and out of the house. He helped take care of the baby by making bottles, changing diapers, and singing lullabies. Kris and Katy’s family were there to help as well, but they were grieving too and not sure how to help.
On the day of the funeral, Adam sat beside Kris and held his hand throughout the service. Later that evening, after everyone had left, Kris watched from the doorway of the nursery, as Adam sang his daughter to sleep. His heart broke because it was supposed to be Katy that he watched. His heart also filled with love for his best friend who had been his rock for the last week and for his daughter who would insure that Katy lived on.
“Thank you.” Kris stated when Adam walked out of the nursery a few minutes later. He wrapped his arms around Adam in a tight embrace which Adam returned.
“No thanks are necessary, Kris. We’re best friends and that’s what best friends do for one another.” Adam responded as he moved away from Kris.
“I think that you’ve gone above and beyond what most friends would do for one another and I really appreciate that. You’re friendship means a lot to me.”
“And yours means a lot to me. I would do anything for you.” Adam replied as he leaned down and gently placed a kiss on Kris’ forehead.
“You’re really good with the baby. I know that I haven’t been but I’m going to do better.” Kris spoke as he pulled the nursery door closed and they headed downstairs.
“Speaking of the baby, I think that it’s high time that you gave her a proper name. Everyone goes around calling her the baby or baby girl or sweetie or precious or something, but she needs a real name.” Adam told him as they entered the kitchen.
“I know that, but I’m having a hard time thinking of something.” Kris replied as he took a seat at the kitchen table.
“Didn’t you and Katy pick anything out together?” Adam inquired as he set about the kitchen making them some hot tea.
“No…Katy didn’t want to pick anything out. She said that we would know the right name for her when she was born, but I’m totally clueless.” Kris admitted.
“Alright…Well, I could help you pick out something if you want.” Adam said as he placed a cup of tea in front of Kris and sat down across from him with his own tea in hand.
“You would do that?” Kris asked as he looked up at his best friend.
“Like I said, I would do anything for you and for that little girl for that matter. I couldn’t stand the thought of her being called baby for the rest of her life. It might be cute now, but when she’s a teenager she’s going to hate you for it.”
“Point taken. We won’t go to bed tonight until she has a name.”
“Good. I think I saw a baby name book on the shelf in the living room. I’ll get and we can get to work.” Adam smiled at his friend and left the room to retrieve the book.
A minute or so later, Adam returned with the book. He pulled his chair over and sat beside Kris at the table. Kris opened the book to the girls’ names section and they began to pour over it. A lot of names were selected and then discarded for being too old-fashioned, too popular, too eccentric, or not different enough.
“That’s it!” Kris exclaimed pointing to a name on the page.
“What?” Adam inquired trying to see what name his friend was pointing at.
“Karis…It’s perfect. It starts with a K and combines my name with Katy’s.” Kris explained triumphantly with his first smile in days.
“It’s beautiful.” Adam replied as he beamed back at his friend.
“Karis Leila Allen.” Kris spoke his daughter’s name for the first time. He liked the way it sounded.
“Leila…That’s…that’s uh…my…my mom’s name.” Adam stated getting a little choked up.
“I know…You’ve been so great through all of this…and not just Katy’s death. For the last two years, you’ve been my best friend through every up and down imaginable. I want my daughter to have a name that honors you. Katy would have wanted that too.” Kris clarified.
“Well, I am honored and my mom will be as well.” Adam responded trying to hold back the tears that were threatening to fall.
“Well, picking her name was the easy part compared to everything else that I’m going to have to do and decide. I have to figure out how I’m going to raise Karis alone.” Kris told him as he got up from the table and took their cups to the sink.
“You aren’t alone. You have your family…and Katy’s family…” Adam began.
“Yeah, but they’re in Arkansas, so unless I give up my life and career here and move back home, they aren’t going to be a lot of help. I mean I know that they’re going to be around and do whatever they can and I want that, but I couldn’t ask any of them to give up the lives that they have in Arkansas for me and Karis. I’ll figure it out. I’m taking time off from the career for now. When I’m ready to go back to work, I’ll hire a nanny or something.”
“You and Karis always have me.” Adam told him as he joined him by the sink.
“What are you going to give up your career and be Karis’ nanny?” Kris asked with a laugh.
“I would do that if it was necessary...But what I mean is you and Karis could come stay with me. I have plenty of room and I’m also taking a break right now. Once you get things figured out, we can decide what the next step is.” Adam explained.
“Really? You’d do all of that for me and Karis.” Kris paused a moment and looked at Adam. “Of course you would because you’re Adam.”
“Kris, I…”
“Adam, it’s wonderful of you to offer, but it’s too much to ask of you. It’s too big of a sacrifice for you to make.” Kris responded with tears nearly falling. Adam never ceased to amaze him with his generosity. He knew that he was lucky to have Adam in his life and so was his daughter.
“It wouldn’t be a sacrifice. You’re my best friend and I love you guys.” Adam told his friend. He could see the resistance in his eyes. “Listen, just think about it okay and know that I’m here for you whatever you need.”
“Thanks, man.” Kris replied as he gave Adam a hug.
“It’s getting late. I should be going so you can get some rest.” Adam declared as he moved away from Kris. “Unless you want me to stay again tonight.”
“No…I’ll be fine. I need to get used to being alone.” Kris replied with sadness.
“I’m only a phone call away.” Adam told him as he headed for the door.
When Adam got home and climbed into bed, all he could do was toss and turn. He had about a million thoughts running through his head. He was worried about Kris. He was worried about Karis. He was trying to quiet the feelings that were stirring inside of him.
It was no secret that Adam had been crushing on Kris ever since meeting on American Idol. Adam had crushed on straight boys before and he always ended up heartbroken. Despite all of this, Adam and Kris had become the best of friends. Over time, Adam’s crush had dissipated and he had become great friends with Katy as well. Adam was happy to just be friends with Kris. When Kris told him that he and Katy were having a baby, he had been excited to be “Uncle” Adam. He had just gotten off a flight from New York City when he got word that Katy had gone into labor. He headed straight to the hospital even though he was dead tired. He wanted to see his best friend and his new niece. Just before he arrived at the hospital, he received word that Katy had been rushed into emergency surgery. When he walked into the hospital room and saw his best friend so broken, all he wanted to do was take away the pain. He knew that wasn’t possible, so for the last several days he’d been doing everything he could to help out. As a matter of fact, this was the first night since arriving back in L.A. that he had been in his own bed. He had been sleeping on Kris’ couch.
Mostly, what was running through his head and keeping him from some much needed sleep was the fact that his crush on Kris was seeping back into his heart. He didn’t want to have these feelings. He knew that they wouldn’t be returned. He didn’t want to lose his best friend or his “uncle” status to Karis over feelings that he couldn’t control no matter how much he tried. He didn’t want to be heartbroken, but he didn’t know how else this was going to end.
Even though his feelings for Kris were growing, he had meant it when he told him they could move in with him. He knew that he was playing with fire and that he was delusional. However, he thought that just having Kris around would be enough for him.
“Fucking crazy idiot!” Adam scolded himself as he threw back the covers and sat on the edge of his bed. “He just lost his wife…He’s straight. He’s your fucking best friend for God’s sake.”
Just as he was about to go get a shower, he heard the doorbell ring. It was almost midnight. He had no idea would it could be. He hoped that it was Kris.
When he got downstairs and looked out the window, he saw Kris standing there. He had Karis in her car seat in one hand and a duffel bag in the other. Adam opened the door and just looked at his friend. Finally, he stepped aside and allowed him to come in.
“The house just seemed so empty. Karis and I couldn’t stay there.” Kris explained as he sat the car seat and bag down.
“You’re always welcome here…You know that.” Adam told him.
“I was hoping that you hadn’t changed your mind. Anyway, it’s just for a little while until we find a new place. I can’t live in that house anymore. I see Katy everywhere I look. I mean it was her dream house. I need to find mine and Karis’ dream house.” Kris continued.
“You and Karis stay as long as you like…as long as you need.” Adam replied as he bent down to remove the half asleep baby from the car seat.
“Thanks, Adam. I still have a few things in the car. I’ll be right back.” Kris announced as he headed back out the door.
Adam cradled Karis to his chest as he watched Kris walk out the door.
“Oh, baby girl, what have I gotten myself into?” Adam questioned softly as he dropped a kiss on her head.
Six months later, Kris and Karis were still living with Adam. They had moved in everything that Kris wanted from his house and then he had sold Katy’s dream home. So far, Kris hadn’t tried to find another place. Adam wasn’t complaining though. He loved having Kris and Karis at his place. They had fallen into a nice routine. It felt right for the three of them to be together. Adam could pretend that he had what he wanted. However, in the back of his mind, he knew that it was destined to come crashing down around him.
Around the fifth month mark, the nightmares started. Adam thought that Kris had been dealing pretty well with Katy’s death. However, their anniversary was approaching and suddenly Kris started having nightmares. The first one had woken Adam up from a deep sleep. He had rushed to Kris’ side and comforted him. Kris never told him what the nightmares were about, but they got worse. Kris would creep into Adam’s room in the middle of the night with tears streaming down his face and his body shaking. Adam would pull up the covers, scoot over, and Kris would climb in. They wouldn’t talk and Adam would just hold him until he went back to sleep. Of course, this new situation did nothing to help Adam get over his feelings for Kris. If anything, it strengthened them. After a straight month of nightmares, it got to the point that Kris couldn’t even sleep unless he was in Adam’s bed. This led to a whole new problem. At first, Adam and Kris would wake up on different sides of the bed. Lately, however, Adam would wake up with Kris wrapped around him or pressed up against him. Some mornings, he would allow himself a few moments to enjoy the feeling of Kris so close. Those mornings inevitably led to a shower where he imagined all the things that he wanted to do to Kris while he touched himself.
After about a month or so of sharing Adam’s bed, Kris announced that he was going to see a therapist. Adam was glad that his friend was going to get some help because the nightmares had only gotten worse.
“How did your first session go?” Adam inquired from the chair where he was giving Karis her bottle.
“It went well. It was easier to talk to her than I thought it would be. I felt so good after that I stopped by the real estate agency that I used to sell the house and talked to them about finding a new place.” Kris told him as he took Karis and continued to feed her.
“That’s great.” Adam lied trying to hide the hurt in his voice and on his face.
“You’ve been great, but I just figured that it was time that Karis and I gave you your space back. I feel like we’ve been cramping your style for the last few months.” Kris explained as he made funny faces at his daughter.
“I’ve loved having both of you here. Don’t feel rushed. Take your time and find the perfect place for you and Karis.” Adam spoke.
“Thanks, Adam…for everything.”
“No problem…Listen, I’m actually going to head out for awhile. I’m meeting the band at Tommy’s. We’re going to jam…maybe write a song.” Adam said as he headed for the door.
“Okay…See you when you get home.” Kris responded as he tried to burp Karis.
When Adam got to his car, he just sat there for a few minutes. He knew that it was going to end, but he hadn’t been ready for it to happen yet. He didn’t want Kris to leave and he knew that was completely selfish, but it didn’t change how he felt.
“Maybe I should see a therapist.” Adam told himself as he started the engine and drove away.
Adam had expected things to really change after Kris’ announcement. However, when he returned from Tommy’s that night; Kris was sleeping in his bed. He sighed, stripped down, and climbed into bed. Kris woke up about half and cuddled up to Adam.
“Did you have a good time?” Kris questioned sleepily as he threw his arm over Adam’s chest.
“Yeah.” Adam breathed.
“Good.” Kris whispered before falling back to sleep.
Adam lay awake for a long time afterwards. It was killing him to be this close to Kris, to have these feelings for him and not be able to do anything about it.