Fic: Come Inside (Jane/Maura)

[pew_pew_pew]

Title: Come Inside
Rating: PG-13 (language)
Fandom: Rizzoli and Isles
Pairing: Maura Isles/Jane Rizzoli
Spoilers: none
Summary: Cliche scene. I was tired. Needs editing.
Disclaimer: You know the drill

Jane wraps her arms tightly around herself, fighting the onslaught of heavy rain as opaque sheets of it blow towards her, curls of heavy hair slicking

Comments

[lurkete]

Awesome and heartfelt :)
So much is happening in such a short amount of time, intense.
You're so good at switching, almost seamlessly between some pretty extreme moods in your stories.
The emotions here are especially tangible. love it.

One tiny thing though - a pure technicality that I tried to ignore, but nevertheless really bothered me (I think because I used to handle firearms):
It seems that Jane was holding her gun drawn and dropped it on the floor outside Maura's place. That is very dangerous and anyone that is used to handling a pistol (like a cop) would jump and pick it up no matter how emotionally distraught. At least that's what was drilled into me.

The above can still be explained away by Jane's hectic state of mind and the late hour, but what really tampered with my suspension of disbelief is that it seems that Jane never picks the gun up and kind'a leaves it on the front porch when she goes inside O_o

[pew_pew_pew]

LMAO this comment is absolute quality :))
Thanks so much for pointing all that out, I had to write something because I do that thing where I fall in love with a pairing and then life gets in the way (mainly uni) and I fall out of love before I've even had a chance to give the ship a go.

So THANK YOU. I'll edit it eventually, looking back on it it's fucking ludicrous. What's even more fucked up is snuffync gave me a whole crash-course on firearm-handling and clearly all the information went down the shitter (!)

But yeah, you can be my beta haha.

[snuffnyc]

BUT at least we know the glock won't go boom when she drops it!! Upside.

;) Loved this, by the way. Very vivid, which... is my favorite. I like to get immersed in a story, no matter how short or long. And I can feel the rain and when Jane runs her hands through her hair and gets snagged... I can feel that.

More please now yes thank you hurry.

[pew_pew_pew]

Laugh it up haha. Fixed it...somewhat :)

P.S I LOVED your update. I'm too lazy to write you a comment but oh my baby jesus, Jane is just...terrific. The contrast between Maura and Williams is superb, really spot on. Breaks my heart a little if I may say so :')

[tanama30]

very heart felt scene you just feel jane's intensity for maura's safety. awesome story. loved it

[pew_pew_pew]

Jane's nothing if not a little intense. Pesky detectives, what can I say :)

[darkemberdagger]

Very sweet. Jane is so protective of Maura even when she isn't in danger

[pew_pew_pew]

But she IS in danger...or is she? Meh, it's certainly more fun this way, what with Jane rushing to her side and proving her undying love time and again :D

[ml_spikie]

Really sweet. Nicely done.

[pew_pew_pew]

No sweeter than your icon but I'll take it ;)

[ttandme69]

great story...eagerly awaiting more R&I from you! thanks, Lisa

[pew_pew_pew]

Oh my, how gay-tastic is that bottle 0_0
Thanks for the wonderful comment, I'm hoping to find a bit more writing-time this term :)