New York City, Early Saturday morning
The Shocker
An alarm went off. Seconds later, a man in a ridiculous poofy jacket ran out of a bank. "Ha! I'm in the clear this time! Nobody can stop The Shocker!" To emphasize this, he pointed some sort of machine in his hand at a bystander and activated it. A strange rumbling could be heard through the air as the pedestrian was fired backwards into a car. Truly, this was a dangerous individual.
Major K!
One of the things Kawalsky had packed, for reasons only he knew, was the Major K! mask that The Tick had given him. He'd been waiting here to meet up with Zero and whoever she ended up bringing with her (it was Fandom, there was no telling who would show up) when the alarm went off.
Then he saw the guy in the jacket and the attack on the passer-by. So this was what crime was like in Peter's world. Realizing he'd probably never get a chance like this again and would never live it down if he just stood by and let this guy get away, Kawalsky hurriedly stashed his backpack behind a trash can, pulled out the mask and slipped it on.
He really had no idea what he was doing, so he ran straight into the path of the guy who was trying to escape. How did superheroes do this? Right. Say something witty. "You're leaving already? But we haven't even given these nice folks a show."
The Shocker
Pausing just long enough to realize that this burly guy wasn't just Spider-Man in a new costume again, the Shocker grinned. "What're you, a new guy?"
Major K!
"Substitute superhero. I fill in when the other guys are on vacation. Who're you anyway and who the hell made your outfit, your mom? You might wanna tell her the seventies are over and they weren't that great the first time around."
The Shocker
"You want to die, don't you, kid?" Shocker asked. "Fine. I'll let you know who's about to kill you. I'm The Shocker. The jacket protects me from the power of my vibro-shock units. That's these things."
Shocker pointed the vibro-shock units at a mailbox and activated them. The mailbox burst open and was flung across the street. "That's going to be you in a second."
Major K!
That didn't look like a good way to die. "See, that doesn't work for me. I've got a guy I've gotta rescue later today and a girlfriend...sort of girlfriend that I'm looking forward to seeing again and a daughter from the future who'll probably be pretty pissed off and find a way to avoid blinking out of existence just so she can kick your ass for messing with her Dad. So let's talk about this." He started to circle The Shocker. "I'm playing the superhero. You're playing the supervillain. We've got people watching and we both want to impress. So here's what I'm thinking: we fight hand-to-hand for a bit, put on a good show, I get to look like I tried to stop you, you get away to hatch nefarious plans for another day. Work for you?"
He was really moving into position to roll in fast enough to knock the guy off guard, edging in as he circled just enough without looking like he was attacking.
The Shocker
"No, I think I'll just kill you," Shocker said, aiming his vibro-shock units at Kawalsky's chest level and firing.
Major K!
He'd been afraid of that. Used to being shot at, Kawalsky dropped flat onto the ground, then swung his leg around to try to take out Shocker's legs.
The Shocker
The Shocker wasn't a very physical fighter. That's why he had vibro-shock units in the first place.
And that's why the leg sweep totally worked. "Oof!" he panted as he hit the ground, somewhat dazed.
Major K!
Kawalsky pushed himself up and tackled the Shocker, trying to grab hold of the shock thingies he had.
The Shocker
"Let go!" Shocker yelled, firing a vibro-shock blast randomly. "Get off!"
Major K!
The shock whizzed past Kawalsky's ear, making it tingle almost painfully. He managed to get Shocker into a hold that would pin him down firmly. "I tried to get you to play nice. We could've had a good fight and put on a good show and you had to go and be a bastard. So now I'm gonna punch you in the face and make you bleed."
So he did.
The Shocker
And Shocker bled. "Dop id!" he yelled. Look at that, his nose was broken. "I gib ub!"
Major K!
Kawalsky looked confused for a second, not understanding what he said. "Ohhh, you give up?"
The Shocker
Shocker let go of his vibro-shock units, knowing full well how surrender went by this point. "Yeah, I gib ub! I'll wait for the bolice. No bore hibbing!"
Major K!
"I was kind of expecting more of a fight." He shrugged. "No more hitting, but if you try anything, I'm gonna hurt you again. Now promise than when you get out of jail, you're gonna think about seeing someone about your dress sense. Get out of the 70s, man."
The Shocker
"Yebs, sir," Shocker said, pouting. At least it wasn't Spider-Man this time.
Major K!
Kawalsky kept Shocker pinned down until there were sirens close by. He was getting a cramp by this stage. "You stay down. If you get up, I'm gonna be watching and I'm gonna be pretty mad, got it?"
The Shocker
The Shocker sighed. He'd be out of jail in another few weeks anyway. Nothing he hadn't dealt with before. "Yebs," he promised.
Major K!
The sirens got louder and louder and police cars came into view. "Been a pleasure doing business with you." With that, he gave Shocker one more shove, then ran off to grab his bag and find somewhere to pull off his mask and jacket.
Zero
A huge teal van screeched to a halt and Zero hopped out, looking frantic, harried, and pretty much like she'd just driven straight from Virginia to New York because her boyfriend had been kidnapped. She'd worry about it later if Dave got towed.
Isabel
Isabel was out the door right behind her, looking just as worried.
Kawalsky
Charlie was there, keeping an eye out for them after the ordeal with the Shocker. He raised a hand and jogged towards them. "Hey girls. You doing okay?"
Zero
"Since we put down the squaller with a really bad skin condition, yeh, except my boyfriend is missing," Zero told Charlie.
Kawalsky
"We'll find him. You guys ran into a squaller?" He had no idea what she was talking about, but it didn't sound good.
Zero
"Yes," said Zero. "I hit him with a mallet. Isabel did her alien-fu thing. I hope he has a nasty concussion. What's goin' on?"
Kawalsky
Okay, Kawalsky thought, looking at them both. They still managed to get up here, so they weren't in dire need of medical attention or anything. "I had to pretend to be a superhero to stop a bank-robbing supervillain while waiting for you guys. There's no sign of Princess anywhere and I haven't seen the goons that took him either. They were definitely after *him* though. They set off his brainfuzz thingy and lured him in, then ambushed him."
Isabel
"Bad guys or SHIELD?" Isabel wondered, not that there was much difference in her mind.
Kawalsky
"They had superpowers and I know that could mean pretty much anyone here, but Peter said these SHIELD guys were some kind of super-military. I only caught a glimpse, but they didn't look military to me. They looked...I don't know, I think one of them had a tail."
Isabel
"So bad guys then." She turned, looking around at the city, somehow this wasn't how she expected her first trip to New York to go. "Any idea on how to find them?"
Kawalsky
"If I did, I wouldn't have called Zero and waited 4 hours."
Zero
"Unfortunately," Zero said, "Zero doesn't have any more clue than you do. She does, however, have a mallet." She gestured to Isabel. "And Isabel."
Isabel
Isabel frowned, wishing things were off to a better start. She was just opening her mouth to say something when...
Spider-Woman
"So, you're friends with Peter Parker?" a voice asked before a costumed girl dropped down from seemingly out of nowhere.
Kawalsky
Kawalsky was startled and took a quick few steps back, looking at her. "I think you're gonna need a new costume idea. That one's been done."
Spider-Woman
"Trust me, if I could sew I'd trade it in," the girl said. "But it has its uses for now."
Zero
Random person who was not her boyfriend in a spider-esque costume dropping out of nowhere? Zero knew how to deal with this.
Mallet attack fury!
Spider-Woman
The girl turned suddenly and fired webbing from her fingertips at the mallet. "Nuh uh. No hitting, I'm here to help. If you don't want any, that's fine, I'll just have to break him out on my own."
Zero
As Zero tugged on her mallet in a futile attempt to free it from the webbing, she snarled, "And we're supposed to believe you, random girl what drops from the sky?"
Spider-Woman
"Well, I was kind of hoping it would go that way," the girl said. "Guess not, huh? Is there any way I can gain your trust soon enough to make a difference or are we just going to watch Short Stuff here throw her back out trying to get the mallet? Seriously, just wait for it to dissolve some or cut it with a knife or something."
Zero
"Oh, yes, insult my height, that's very clever." The fact that this chick hadn't tried to knock any of them out yet seemed to be a point in her favor, but Zero still didn't like her. "Maybe next you could call me a hopeless savage?"
Jessica
"I don't know you well enough to call you completely hopeless, but savage sounds right so far," the girl said. "Fine, you know what, this is happening the easy way. You can call me Jessica." She pulled her mask down and let it rest around her neck. Her face looked exactly like a feminine version of Peter's face. "I'm one of a bunch of clones of Peter. The people who made me have him. That's not a good thing."
Isabel
Isabel blinked. "No it's not. How do we get him back?" She wasn't quite ready to trust her. But they had to start somewhere.
Jessica
"I'm pretty sure I know where they have him," Jessica said. "The basic plan was that we go there, beat people up, and take him back."
Whether or not the clone claim was true, Jessica clearly shared Peter's mind for strategy.
Isabel
"Personally I don't see any problems with that plan," Isabel replied. "Zero? Charlie?"
Kawalsky
Kawalsky narrowed his eyes at Jessica. Clones weren't exactly unheard of. Charlie was one, after all. But shared genes didn't mean she wasn't leading them into a trap. "I could list them, but we'd be here all day and we don't have much of a choice."
Zero
It sounded like a plan Zero could get behind, despite the fact that she didn't like the person proposing it. "Swerval. I'm in."
Jessica
"Okay then. You're driving," Jessica said. "We're going to Jersey."
Zero
"Swerval." Zero tugged at her mallet a few more times before asking, "Er. Has anybody got a knife?"
Kawalsky
"I've got my Swiss Army knife." Thank you, Shop class.
Isabel
"And if that doesn't work, I can try my thing," Isabel offered.
Zero
"Whatever works," Zero told them. "'Cause as soon as my mallet's loose we can go save my boyfriend."
Kawalsky
"Sure," he fished it out of his bag and handed it over. "I've got my sidearm too."
Jessica
As she took a seat on a wall, waiting for the mallet crisis to be resolved, Jessica wondered if it would be easier to just steal the van and pick up Daredevil or someone. Unfortunately, she didn't know how to drive. "This will be fun," she muttered to herself.
[OOC: Preplayed with kawalsky, swerval_zero, and izzyalienqueen. NFB, no interaction, distance, etc. Boy, it feels weird to have a post that doesn't - strictly speaking - feature my character.]