Teevee, Teevee, Everywhere, Nor Any Plop to Think
A friend of mine did something noteworthy the other day, and forwarded me a copy. He wrote his local eatery with a complaint:
Why does the Bothell, Washington Qdoba have Fox news on the only TV? I would think that offends more people than it pleases. The food is good, but I can't eat in a place with that contemptuous and contemptible garbage on.
They responded (to their credit), but without saying anything (to their detriment):
Thank you for your e-mail regarding Qdoba #2089. We appreciate your taking the time to provide us with your feedback and will be following up with the restaurant management to assure they are aware of your concerns. Please don't hesitate to contact our Guest Relations department at 1-888-497-3622 anytime you have a comment or concern you want us to be aware of. Our representatives are available Monday through Friday, 7am to 4pm PT.
I guess they did say they would contact management, and that might be something. The local Qdoba nearest my work plays something other than Faux. Maybe programming decisions are left to the local management. Maybe that will change. One can hope.
This morning, though, I realized that he noted the wrong problem. The issue isn't with Faux News on the tube, it's the fact that there is a tube to watch. In a fast food joint, or in just about any formerly tv-free zone. Like a waiting room.
Rather than work my full day today, I was instead randomly selected and thus required to head down to the local Whiz Quiz Joint and surrender a sample of my Precious Bodily Fluids for urinalysis. At 7 am I walked in and found to my horror the Today Show idjits pretending to be chipper right there on the waiting room plasma screen.
(Folks, I don't really care what you watch. If you like the Today Show, please, by all means, watch the Today Show. Sit through the insipid commercials that fund Matt and Meridith and Al and all the equipment it takes to shove their chipperness through the skull holes of millions. But please, please, please don't expect me to be just as full of vim and vigor and tolerance at seven in the freakin' aye em!)
This put me in a bit of a bind. I knew I would blow a gasket if I had to suffer their cutesy antics, but I had to sit around and wait for the cups to be aligned for my random besoilment. Further, I knew that I had no donation on tap, and so would sit around for some time refilling the bladder so I could legally unload.
I was in trouble. I didn't want to go postal.
So I checked in and politely informed the window person I would be stepping outside.
"But I'm going to call you in just a few moments," she said.
"I know, but I can't stand television. I'll be right outside."
"But it will be very soon."
"I know," I insisted, "but television gets me . . . . I'll be just outside in the lobby."
I let my voice get weird just before that ellipsis. I let my face get weirder. I think she got the message.
Ah, but when I had to wait for my bladder to refill, I again told her I'd be right outside. No can do, apparently. One is not allowed anything but their bottled water for a refresher nowadays, so I had to sit in the waiting room. They had to watch and make sure I didn't try to adulterate my internal sample. I was trapped.
She was kind enough to turn off the idiot screen while my kidneys did their job. During my wait, more entered and waited with me. Here I had some interesting thoughts. Certain telly shows really do get me antsy, sometimes almost violent. What if I had not been the first one in the waiting room and had asked them to shut down the silliness? What if someone else had insisted on having the damned thing on? Never mind the poor receptionist having to suffer idiots like me -- who has the legal right to have their wishes observed?
The more I thought about it, the more I thought it must be me. Why? For me, many shows and most commercials are a type of torture. Ask anyone. I don't sit still like a good boy when either bloviates my life away. Since other, more TV-philic folks do go into public spaces without the glass teats, it must be assumed they will survive without undo harm if they are denied a little tube suckling time. Furthermore, since none of us can leave the room in this weird circumstance (lest we taint our tainted fluids like common terrorists would), I'd say the one with the more pressing mental position on this issue must be given precedence.
And that would be me. Thankfully, I have a very expressive face. I can wordlessly convince just about anyone that a certain Mr. Hyde will soon be visiting, unless.
And if I had to sit and watch a commercial broadcast without the option to leave the room, I think I would sue . . . if I could keep my mental together.
Really, is television so all-fired important that it must be available 24/7? I sense a backlash in the making similar to what happened decades with smoking acceptability. Too many tubes in too many places will have people craving release from the awful boxes as I do today. Things will happen. It's inevitable. Laws will be passed.
Or am I a bit insane? Is my antipathy that of a complete behavioral outlier? I honestly don't know.
Why does the Bothell, Washington Qdoba have Fox news on the only TV? I would think that offends more people than it pleases. The food is good, but I can't eat in a place with that contemptuous and contemptible garbage on.
They responded (to their credit), but without saying anything (to their detriment):
Thank you for your e-mail regarding Qdoba #2089. We appreciate your taking the time to provide us with your feedback and will be following up with the restaurant management to assure they are aware of your concerns. Please don't hesitate to contact our Guest Relations department at 1-888-497-3622 anytime you have a comment or concern you want us to be aware of. Our representatives are available Monday through Friday, 7am to 4pm PT.
I guess they did say they would contact management, and that might be something. The local Qdoba nearest my work plays something other than Faux. Maybe programming decisions are left to the local management. Maybe that will change. One can hope.
This morning, though, I realized that he noted the wrong problem. The issue isn't with Faux News on the tube, it's the fact that there is a tube to watch. In a fast food joint, or in just about any formerly tv-free zone. Like a waiting room.
Rather than work my full day today, I was instead randomly selected and thus required to head down to the local Whiz Quiz Joint and surrender a sample of my Precious Bodily Fluids for urinalysis. At 7 am I walked in and found to my horror the Today Show idjits pretending to be chipper right there on the waiting room plasma screen.
(Folks, I don't really care what you watch. If you like the Today Show, please, by all means, watch the Today Show. Sit through the insipid commercials that fund Matt and Meridith and Al and all the equipment it takes to shove their chipperness through the skull holes of millions. But please, please, please don't expect me to be just as full of vim and vigor and tolerance at seven in the freakin' aye em!)
This put me in a bit of a bind. I knew I would blow a gasket if I had to suffer their cutesy antics, but I had to sit around and wait for the cups to be aligned for my random besoilment. Further, I knew that I had no donation on tap, and so would sit around for some time refilling the bladder so I could legally unload.
I was in trouble. I didn't want to go postal.
So I checked in and politely informed the window person I would be stepping outside.
"But I'm going to call you in just a few moments," she said.
"I know, but I can't stand television. I'll be right outside."
"But it will be very soon."
"I know," I insisted, "but television gets me . . . . I'll be just outside in the lobby."
I let my voice get weird just before that ellipsis. I let my face get weirder. I think she got the message.
Ah, but when I had to wait for my bladder to refill, I again told her I'd be right outside. No can do, apparently. One is not allowed anything but their bottled water for a refresher nowadays, so I had to sit in the waiting room. They had to watch and make sure I didn't try to adulterate my internal sample. I was trapped.
She was kind enough to turn off the idiot screen while my kidneys did their job. During my wait, more entered and waited with me. Here I had some interesting thoughts. Certain telly shows really do get me antsy, sometimes almost violent. What if I had not been the first one in the waiting room and had asked them to shut down the silliness? What if someone else had insisted on having the damned thing on? Never mind the poor receptionist having to suffer idiots like me -- who has the legal right to have their wishes observed?
The more I thought about it, the more I thought it must be me. Why? For me, many shows and most commercials are a type of torture. Ask anyone. I don't sit still like a good boy when either bloviates my life away. Since other, more TV-philic folks do go into public spaces without the glass teats, it must be assumed they will survive without undo harm if they are denied a little tube suckling time. Furthermore, since none of us can leave the room in this weird circumstance (lest we taint our tainted fluids like common terrorists would), I'd say the one with the more pressing mental position on this issue must be given precedence.
And that would be me. Thankfully, I have a very expressive face. I can wordlessly convince just about anyone that a certain Mr. Hyde will soon be visiting, unless.
And if I had to sit and watch a commercial broadcast without the option to leave the room, I think I would sue . . . if I could keep my mental together.
Really, is television so all-fired important that it must be available 24/7? I sense a backlash in the making similar to what happened decades with smoking acceptability. Too many tubes in too many places will have people craving release from the awful boxes as I do today. Things will happen. It's inevitable. Laws will be passed.
Or am I a bit insane? Is my antipathy that of a complete behavioral outlier? I honestly don't know.