Comments | pepper_field: Deep down within me words move in phrases

pepper_field

Deep down within me words move in phrases

Mar 22, 2010 23:35

Because I am essentially vain and cruel, this is the snippet I cut from the end of Unlahfulliche in Lyhte:

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( Read that first, though, otherwise this'll completely spoil the ending. )

stargate fic, writing stuff

Comments 25

holdouttrout March 23 2010, 04:17:12 UTC

Ah hah hah! I hadn't refreshed my flist before commenting, or I would have just come straight over here. Dude. You are SO. EVIL. I think I like the final cut better, but I love this little scene, too. And the speculative narration that accompanies it.

pepper_field March 23 2010, 23:15:25 UTC

Heh. Well, at least I kept it separate from the story proper - I'm only slightly evil. The Diet Coke of evil, as it were... *g*

holdouttrout March 24 2010, 02:17:38 UTC

Wait. You're saying that Diet Coke is somehow less evil than Coke Classic? That stuff is EVIL, man.

lolmac March 23 2010, 04:56:09 UTC

I love them both, and I'm glad you posted both, and that you posted them separately.

Go sequel go.

pepper_field March 23 2010, 23:18:55 UTC

Aw, thank you - I don't usually post the cut scenes, but I was particularly precious about this one. :)

No, sequel, no. Mac pr0n next! This story needs to stay out of my head!

lolmac March 24 2010, 00:05:40 UTC

Ooo! We can has Mac pron? Sequels good, Mac pr0n better!

pepper_field March 24 2010, 00:13:28 UTC

Gah. It's going badly, at the mo. I've written all the stuff leading up to the pr0n, but it's all... meh. And not particularly Mac-ish. And I can't seem to write the pr0n bit. So, it's like Mac pr0n without the Mac or the pr0n. :(

Thread 7

nandamai March 23 2010, 16:08:04 UTC

Heh. Cute, and nicely evil, but yeah, I agree with Aurora, too. The other ending goes better with the story as a whole.

pepper_field March 23 2010, 23:22:35 UTC

Yeah, it did. She's a great beta. :) I'm not usually precious about cut scenes, but I'm feeling particularly I-must-share-the-contents-of-my-brain-with-you-all, lately. *g*

toadflax234 March 23 2010, 22:36:51 UTC

Lol!

Evil.

pepper_field March 23 2010, 23:24:35 UTC

Just a leeeeeeeeeeeeettle bit. I did warn people, after all. *g*

thothmes March 25 2010, 05:38:37 UTC

Oooh! (Now that I'm finally here. It's been one of those weeks, and don't ask because then you'll know.) I can haz the DVD with the movie the way I like it, and the cut scenes in the Extras to mull over! I like that when it happens in the commercial product, and I like it here. I thoroughly enjoyed the snippet, and the "And then..." to the snippet, but agree that the piece was tighter as originally posted.

Best of both worlds! Score!