Daddy's Little Girl
Name: Daddy's Little Girl
Characters: Rhys, Spencer, Vaughn, and Cassius
Rating: PGish
Summary: The four men talk about the aspirations their teenaged children chose and come to some horrifying realizations.
Notes: There's more fourth wall breaking than I normally do, but these four are accustomed to doing that. Also, I sort of imagine that when a Sim hits Teen, they're high school freshmen, which is around fourteen (and it's more acceptable to think about a fourteen year old dating a sixteen year old).
Word Count: 948
***
"So what's the damage?" Spencer asked Rhys, Vaughn, and Cassius one night at the bar shortly after their children turned into teenagers. "Anna chose Family Knowledge."
"Niiice," Cassius said appreciatively as he took a swig from his beer bottle. "And she's shy, too, isn't she? Probably won't have any trouble with her."
"Well, there was a slight incident, really brief, when she showed a bit of interest towards Fleetwood," Spencer nodded over at Vaughn, who was Fleetwood's father. "But then I had to point out that she was his great-aunt, so that wouldn't be possible. She wasn't terribly upset though, and it looks like she's set her sights on Ashton, who is also a Family Knowledge Sim."
The three other men murmured congratulations at Spencer's good luck and Vaughn said, "Yeah, I had to have the same conversation with Fleetwood, which was pretty awkward and involved going into greater detail about the family tree and the Multi-Verse. Fortunately he's Knowledge Romance, stress the Knowledge--"
"Yeah, he'll want to 'learn new things.' All sorts of new things, if you catch my drift," Rhys interrupted, which made the other men laugh.
Vaughn smiled and nodded. "Anyway, he was able to grasp the concept of everything and now he wants to find out more about it. I think he won't settle for anyone less than a foreign, imported female, which, for all we know, would inevitably screw up the family tree even more."
"Well, it is tradition," Rhys said sagely as he sipped his scotch. "What about Aravis?"
Vaughn sighed. "Family Popularity, which isn't so bad, I suppose. Thank Plumbbob that for the time being she's content with doing Student Council and the school newspaper stuff. I don't know how I'll feel when she actually wants to start dating. I mean, come on, she's still my little girl!" He looked to Rhys and Cassius. "What about you guys?"
"Ceres took after both me and De," Cassius said proudly. "She's Romance Pleasure and as of right now, she has Zachary Goth wrapped around her little finger, as it should be."
"Zachary Goth? Alexander's son? Is he as big of a douche canoe as his father?" Rhys asked.
"No, actually he's not, which is why I don't have to worry. Ceres bosses him around and he seems to like it. What about your kids?" he asked Rhys.
Rhys sighed as he idly twirled his glass on the table. "Well Quinn takes after me with Romance Family, which is pretty awesome if I do say so myself." He fell silent and wouldn’t say anything more.
"What about Erin?" Spencer prodded.
Rhys grimaced. "My daughter has ten Outgoing."
"Yeah, and?"
"She chose Pleasure Romance," he said in a tragic voice.
Vaughn and Spencer winced in sympathy but Cassius gave him a confused look. "You act like it's the end of the world or something. You and Eden are pretty Outgoing and you're also both Romance."
"I know!" Rhys said with another woebegone sigh. "What sort of things did my little girl pick up from us? As we speak, she's on a date. A date! With Matthew Grunt!"
"Buck and Jill's kid? He seems polite enough."
"And he's also Pleasure Romance. And he's sixteen." He cast his gaze around the table. "You guys remember what it was like to be sixteen, don't you? Take out the Romance Sim part out of it. Just remember the raging hormones. The insatiable urges."
The other three men looked at Rhys with wide-eyed horror as they really remembered what it was like to be a teenaged boy.
"Ashton had better not even think about it," Spencer said quietly. "There would be no talking. Only...action if that animal decides to hurt my little girl."
"I'm pretty sure De would happily let me torture Zachary if he so much as looks at Ceres cross-eyed," Cassius said with a firm nod.
"Oh thank Plumbbob Aravis wants to have lots of friends for the time being," Vaughn breathed thankfully. "So..so what are you going to do about Matthew?"
Rhys smirked. "Oh, the 'issue' has been dealt with. You see, Erin was taking forever and a day to get ready for her first date. You know how they are." The married men all nodded and rolled their eyes, also thankful that it takes them fifteen minutes, tops, to get ready for anything. "Anyway, while she was getting ready, I took him out into the garage and casually began playing with the power tools, telling him all about how I like to get up close and personal with all my projects and how I don't mind getting messy so long as I tidy up afterwards, not leaving any sort of messy trace because I have tarps, you see. I may or may not have also mentioned a non-existent gun collection." He threw his head back and laughed. "The lad looked damn near ready to piss his pants and when Erin came downstairs, he wouldn't look up from the ground."
"Jeebus, overreact much, hypocrite?" Cassius asked with an eye roll.
Rhys slapped his hand on the table. "It's because I remember what goes through a teenaged boy's mind. Not to my teenaged daughter! Not on my watch! Let me tell you, if the fathers of any of the women I dated across the Multi-Verse would have done to me what I did to Matthew, I would have thought twice about boffing them."
"Would you really have abstained?" Spencer asked incredulously.
"Well..no, probably not. But it would have given me pause, I'll tell you that much!"
Everyone laughed and Spencer held up his beer bottle. "To hiding the bodies!"
"To hiding the bodies," the other three chorused.
***
Characters: Rhys, Spencer, Vaughn, and Cassius
Rating: PGish
Summary: The four men talk about the aspirations their teenaged children chose and come to some horrifying realizations.
Notes: There's more fourth wall breaking than I normally do, but these four are accustomed to doing that. Also, I sort of imagine that when a Sim hits Teen, they're high school freshmen, which is around fourteen (and it's more acceptable to think about a fourteen year old dating a sixteen year old).
Word Count: 948
***
"So what's the damage?" Spencer asked Rhys, Vaughn, and Cassius one night at the bar shortly after their children turned into teenagers. "Anna chose Family Knowledge."
"Niiice," Cassius said appreciatively as he took a swig from his beer bottle. "And she's shy, too, isn't she? Probably won't have any trouble with her."
"Well, there was a slight incident, really brief, when she showed a bit of interest towards Fleetwood," Spencer nodded over at Vaughn, who was Fleetwood's father. "But then I had to point out that she was his great-aunt, so that wouldn't be possible. She wasn't terribly upset though, and it looks like she's set her sights on Ashton, who is also a Family Knowledge Sim."
The three other men murmured congratulations at Spencer's good luck and Vaughn said, "Yeah, I had to have the same conversation with Fleetwood, which was pretty awkward and involved going into greater detail about the family tree and the Multi-Verse. Fortunately he's Knowledge Romance, stress the Knowledge--"
"Yeah, he'll want to 'learn new things.' All sorts of new things, if you catch my drift," Rhys interrupted, which made the other men laugh.
Vaughn smiled and nodded. "Anyway, he was able to grasp the concept of everything and now he wants to find out more about it. I think he won't settle for anyone less than a foreign, imported female, which, for all we know, would inevitably screw up the family tree even more."
"Well, it is tradition," Rhys said sagely as he sipped his scotch. "What about Aravis?"
Vaughn sighed. "Family Popularity, which isn't so bad, I suppose. Thank Plumbbob that for the time being she's content with doing Student Council and the school newspaper stuff. I don't know how I'll feel when she actually wants to start dating. I mean, come on, she's still my little girl!" He looked to Rhys and Cassius. "What about you guys?"
"Ceres took after both me and De," Cassius said proudly. "She's Romance Pleasure and as of right now, she has Zachary Goth wrapped around her little finger, as it should be."
"Zachary Goth? Alexander's son? Is he as big of a douche canoe as his father?" Rhys asked.
"No, actually he's not, which is why I don't have to worry. Ceres bosses him around and he seems to like it. What about your kids?" he asked Rhys.
Rhys sighed as he idly twirled his glass on the table. "Well Quinn takes after me with Romance Family, which is pretty awesome if I do say so myself." He fell silent and wouldn’t say anything more.
"What about Erin?" Spencer prodded.
Rhys grimaced. "My daughter has ten Outgoing."
"Yeah, and?"
"She chose Pleasure Romance," he said in a tragic voice.
Vaughn and Spencer winced in sympathy but Cassius gave him a confused look. "You act like it's the end of the world or something. You and Eden are pretty Outgoing and you're also both Romance."
"I know!" Rhys said with another woebegone sigh. "What sort of things did my little girl pick up from us? As we speak, she's on a date. A date! With Matthew Grunt!"
"Buck and Jill's kid? He seems polite enough."
"And he's also Pleasure Romance. And he's sixteen." He cast his gaze around the table. "You guys remember what it was like to be sixteen, don't you? Take out the Romance Sim part out of it. Just remember the raging hormones. The insatiable urges."
The other three men looked at Rhys with wide-eyed horror as they really remembered what it was like to be a teenaged boy.
"Ashton had better not even think about it," Spencer said quietly. "There would be no talking. Only...action if that animal decides to hurt my little girl."
"I'm pretty sure De would happily let me torture Zachary if he so much as looks at Ceres cross-eyed," Cassius said with a firm nod.
"Oh thank Plumbbob Aravis wants to have lots of friends for the time being," Vaughn breathed thankfully. "So..so what are you going to do about Matthew?"
Rhys smirked. "Oh, the 'issue' has been dealt with. You see, Erin was taking forever and a day to get ready for her first date. You know how they are." The married men all nodded and rolled their eyes, also thankful that it takes them fifteen minutes, tops, to get ready for anything. "Anyway, while she was getting ready, I took him out into the garage and casually began playing with the power tools, telling him all about how I like to get up close and personal with all my projects and how I don't mind getting messy so long as I tidy up afterwards, not leaving any sort of messy trace because I have tarps, you see. I may or may not have also mentioned a non-existent gun collection." He threw his head back and laughed. "The lad looked damn near ready to piss his pants and when Erin came downstairs, he wouldn't look up from the ground."
"Jeebus, overreact much, hypocrite?" Cassius asked with an eye roll.
Rhys slapped his hand on the table. "It's because I remember what goes through a teenaged boy's mind. Not to my teenaged daughter! Not on my watch! Let me tell you, if the fathers of any of the women I dated across the Multi-Verse would have done to me what I did to Matthew, I would have thought twice about boffing them."
"Would you really have abstained?" Spencer asked incredulously.
"Well..no, probably not. But it would have given me pause, I'll tell you that much!"
Everyone laughed and Spencer held up his beer bottle. "To hiding the bodies!"
"To hiding the bodies," the other three chorused.
***