Mar 18, 2008 04:21
Fic: Women Beyond the Machine (6/?)
Author: Irishmystery
Fandom: Bionic Woman
Pairing: Sarah Corvus/Jaime Sommers
Rating: R for violence, language, hurt/comfort/angst warning
Disclaimers: They belong to NBC and not me. There are spoilers for episodes 1-4. There is a scene taken directly from episode 3. Some character backgroud was taken from NBC.com. This is unbeta'd and feedback is welcome. Ralst may archive, everyone else please ask.
Dinner was a decidedly tense affair for everyone but Becca who carried the brunt of the conversation as the four sat down for beef stew. Cynthia patiently listened to Becca while she chattered on and added her own thoughts when she could get a word in. Jaime was preoccupied with covertly watching Sarah whose trembling hands had gotten worse. It was only more noticeable when the woman tried to bring a spoon up to her mouth. Sarah gave up and pulled the bowl closer so she had less distance bringing the spoon to her lips. Sarah was also visibly sweating in the comfortable kitchen.
"Jaime, what were you girls doing in that barn? Becca says there was quite a mess in there." Jaime found herself pinned by laser-like blue eyes as Cynthia regarded her.
Jaime blushed before replying, "Sarah and I were moving some crates around and they fell on top of us."
"I’ve been meaning to get around to that but with it just being me, I haven’t had time.," Cynthia said, glancing at Sarah. There was a subtle barb hidden in the comment which Jaime picked up on and Sarah ignored as if it was somehow Sarah’s fault that her mother was by herself handling the farm.
"Hey Sarah, do you think maybe you can start teaching me to ride tomorrow?," Becca asked, hopefully.
Sarah turned a weary gaze to the young teen but cracked a small smile. "Sure kid, if it’s okay with Jaime."
Jaime nodded as Becca’s expectant gaze turned to her.
"You should put her on Coco, Sarah. It’s not like Anne will be needing her anymore.," Cynthia said, with barely veiled contempt.
"Who is Anne?," Becca asked in confusion.
Jaime didn’t like the look on Cynthia’s face. She was out for blood and it was clear who her target was. Sarah’s eyes snapped to her mother and her face tightened.
"Anne was my other daughter, Becca. She was a few years older than you when she died."
"Oh, I’m so sorry.," Becca said, her eyes growing wide. "How did she?," Becca let the sentence hang uncomfortably.
"Well Becca, Anne always wanted to be like her big sister. She wanted to dress like her, hang out with the same people, and drink like her."
Sarah closed her eyes. She knew what was coming next.
"Mother.," she warned.
Cynthia continued like she hadn’t heard. "So one night the two of them snuck out in my car. Sarah was driving because Anne didn’t have a license and Sarah took it upon herself to drink while she was driving. She was speeding and went through an intersection and a car slammed into them. Anne died. Sarah didn’t."
Sarah rose up from the table and Jaime followed suit. Sarah held her hand up to Jaime signaling that she didn’t want to be followed and walked out of the kitchen to the upstairs. Jaime remained standing as she watching the stiff form silently walk up the steps.
"Did you have to be so cruel?," Jaime asked as she looked at the elder Corvus who seemed unperturbed by her daughter’s sudden exit.
Cynthia glared at Jaime. "You shouldn’t judge what you know nothing about.,"she said as she started clearing the table.
"What I know is that Sarah loved her sister and would never have wanted anything bad to happen to her. She walks around with that guilt everyday. That she survived and Anne didn’t.," Jaime said with anger lacing her voice.
Becca stared between the two women, afraid to move. Jaime glanced at her and her demeanor immediately changed when she saw the fear on her sister’s face. "Becca, why don’t you help Cynthia clean up. I’m going for a walk."
Several hours later......
Jaime coasted along the highway in her mom’s old Mustang, taking a sip out of a bottle of Jack before passing it over to her sister in the passenger seat. Her sister took a puff off of her cigarette before voicing her irritation.
"Everyone’s already there. You always do this. We always miss the fun stuff because you’re too slow."
Jaime rolled her eyes. "Don’t tempt me."
Her sister looked away and muttered "sissy" tauntingly. Jaime looked over at her knowing a challenge when she heard it. She pushed the gas to the floor as the accelerator climbed above eighty, letting a laugh out at the rush of speed.
Her sister continued drinking from the almost empty bottle. "Come on, Anne. Don’t bogart.," she said reaching for the bottle.
"There’s only one gulp left."
"There’s at least two.," Jaime argued. "You’re not really going to drink the rest of it are you?"
"You don’t know me very well, do you, Sarah?"
Jaime rolled her eyes in irritation. Before she could blink, she heard the loud honking of a horn and then her world was turned upside down literally as the car turned end over end. Jaime could hear hissing from the engine and she could smell oil and gas leaking from the car. She struggled to get her bearings as her head pounded. She felt something wet splattered on her face and she could taste iron on her lips. She glanced over to her right and saw Anne hanging limply, impaled by a piece of metal through her neck. Jaime screamed as the gravity of the situation hit her.
Jaime bolted up in bed, dripping with sweat and trying to calm her racing heart. She had dreams before that were strange because they hadn’t been her own experiences. She had been Sarah in this dream and had been looking out through her eyes. It had been terrifying and heartbreaking. Jaime glanced over and lightly touched the sleeping form of Becca who had not stirred despite Jaime’s violent awakening.
Jaime pulled herself out of bed and softly walked across the hall. She paused outside Sarah’s door. Her heart bled for the blonde and the pain that she felt at losing her sister. She knew Sarah wasn’t sleeping. She could hear Sarah’s erratic breathing on the other side of the door. Jaime didn’t bother to knock as she slowly opened the door and slipped inside.
The room was dark yet Jaime could clearly make out Sarah huddled in the middle of the bed wrapped in blankets. She was shivering as if she couldn’t get warm.
"Get out, Jaime.," Sarah growled.
"Sarah, I know you’re in pain. Let me help you.," Jaime pleaded.
Sarah shook her head. "I don’t want you to see me like this. I’ll be fine. Just go away."
Jaime looked around the room and spotted the fireplace that she had missed the first time she had been in the room. She turned her gaze to Sarah’s window and headed over to it, opening it slowly. The cold wind filtered in.
"What are you doing?," Sarah asked in irritation. Jaime didn’t reply as she disappeared onto the roof. She grumbled to herself about irritating brunettes with hearts of gold that didn’t listen when you just wanted to be left the fuck alone. She was interrupted by Jaime’s return through the window. She was carrying an armload of wood. Sarah just stared at her with a surprised look on her face.
Jaime began stacking the wood in the fireplace before turning to Sarah and winking. "Got a light?," she asked. Sarah reached over to her bedside table and tossed her lighter to Jaime. Jaime quickly set to work lighting the fire and getting it to the point where it emitted a healthy glow. She turned to the shivering blonde and silently helped her out of bed. Sarah was still fully dressed in jeans and a sweatshirt and was shivering uncontrollably. She allowed Jaime to help her to sit in front of the fire. Jaime leaned her against the front of the bed before sitting down herself. She could feel Sarah shaking next to her despite the heat from the fire. Jaime followed her instincts as she pushed Sarah forward and settled herself behind the blonde so that her legs were on either side of Sarah. She felt Sarah stiffen when she grabbed her around both arms and slowly pulled her back to rest against her body. Sarah let out a sigh and allowed herself to relax into the soft body behind her. She continued to shake but it bothered her less and less. "You don’t have to be alone with this, Sarah.," Jaime said, softly.
"But I am alone with this.," Sarah said, though her voice held no malice or accusation. She sounded tired and more resigned to her fate than defeated. It worried Jaime.
Sarah stared at the bright fire, getting lost in her head as she thought about the woman behind her. She had wronged Jaime in every possible way and even though it hadn’t been personal to Sarah, it certainly had been to Jaime. Jaime was a conundrum. She put herself before others almost to a fault. Sarah had trouble identifying with that. Since the bionics Sarah had been mostly animal, taking what she wanted when she wanted it and not caring who got fucked over in the process. Jaime was making her feel again and Sarah didn’t know what to do with that.
Sarah leaned forwards and wrapped her arms around herself, needing to distance herself from Jaime.
"Sarah, are you okay?," Jaime asked, placing her hand on Sarah’s shoulder. Sarah refused to lean into the touch and steeled herself to ask Jaime the question that had been on her mind. She turned to look over one shoulder at Jaime. Jaime couldn’t read the expression in Sarah’s eyes because she had never seen it before.
"You know I like to think that I have good instincts when it comes to people but you I just can’t figure out.," Sarah began. Jaime frowned but didn’t say anything as the blonde continued.
"You probably have more reason to hate me than anyone and yet you’re here in the middle of the night checking up on me. Don’t get me wrong, I understand lust very well but this sympathy thing kinda sets me on edge."
Sarah’s eyes darkened and Jaime felt a cold chill run down her spine. "If I were you and you ran a truck into me, I’d want to tear your fucking heart out. Or maybe you’re just getting close so you can watch me die."
Jaime’s face hardened in response. "I guess you’re lucky I’m not you. Sometimes I do want to kill you when I think about what you did. It kinda pisses me off. One minute I hate you and then this other side of you comes out like when you’re with my sister and I know that there is this good person hiding in there. Maybe I’m just fucked up. I don’t know."
"Don’t fool yourself honey. I"m rotten to the core.," Sarah said, turning back to the fire. Jaime couldn’t help but admire the golden glow of Sarah’s skin and hair in the firelight.
"What I do know is that I feel connected to you in a way that’s different from anyone else.," Jaime said softly. Sarah didn’t turn around but put her hands behind her so that they were on Jaime’s ankles as she toyed with the cuffs on Jaime’s pants.
"How did you know about my knee earlier? I’m pretty good at hiding it.," Sarah said, changing the subject. Her hands were still mildly twitching but the distraction of the conversation was doing wonders.
Jaime grinned as she recalled the surprise on Sarah’s face when she had taken her right knee out during their barn fight. "You favored it a little when we were outside. Musta been the cold. You going to tell me why your knee is messed up?"
"I suppose you’ve earned that. I tore my ACL during a biathlon. When they put the bionics in me, they didn’t have much to work with on that knee so it acts up every now and again.," Sarah said.
Jaime found herself strangely relieved by the very normal weakness. It made the woman sitting in front of her more human and slightly eased Jaime’s conflicting emotions towards her.
"So what’s the deal with the Sykes Group? What were you doing with them?," Jaime asked, recalling their conversation from earlier.
Sarah continued staring straight ahead but her hands were still in contact with Jaime as she lightly ran her thumbs up and down Jaime’s calves. She debated how much to tell Jaime.
"The Sykes Group is private military kind of like Berkut. Some of it was cake, like when I had to escort diamond traders in Sierra Leone. Security detail was the brighter side of it."
Sarah grew silent then and Jaime waited patiently, not wanting to pry and have the blonde stop speaking altogether.
"Four years ago we were in Falluja. This rebel group had captured someone on my team. I went in and managed to get him out but the rebels had the last laugh. Our jeep hit an IED and Pat lost an arm and both legs. I made it out a little banged up but nothing like him. I carried him like a child a few miles down the road to our rendezvous point. After that, I came home for a month and then Jonas recruited me."
"Why did you leave Sykes?," Jaime asked. Sarah’s account of her time had been so matter of fact and almost scripted that it made her wonder if the blonde was leaving something out.
Sarah turned completely around in the circle of Jaime’s legs and rested her hands on top of Jaime’s thighs lightly. Sarah thought about Jaime’s question and how to answer it.
"Can I ask you something?," Sarah asked as she locked eyes with Jaime. Jaime nodded her assent.
"How did you feel when I had my hand around Becca’s throat and you were just a few feet away?"
Jaime broke Sarah’s gaze and went to move away from her tormenter but Sarah held her in place. "Jaime, please just answer the question.," Sarah pleaded.
"Why, so you can get off on the memory?," Jaime practically spat. She struggled to move away but Sarah was very strong. Sarah looked away and Jaime was surprised to see regret on her face.
Jaime sighed and clamped down on her anger. "I felt angry and helpless. Like I had no control."
"Yes, and wouldn’t you have done everything you could to have an edge so that it didn’t happen again?"
Jaime nodded not really sure yet where Sarah was headed with the questioning. "Yeah, I guess I would."
"The bionics were my edge, Jaime. Maybe if I’d had bionic hearing I would have heard the car coming that hit my sister and I could have saved her. Maybe I could have seen that IED in the desert that stole my friend’s limbs from him. The bionics were my escape from weakness and vulnerability."
Jaime relaxed under Sarah’s grip as another piece of Sarah’s puzzle fell into place. She felt trembling on her thighs and looked down to see Sarah’s hands shaking again. She placed her hands on top of Sarah’s. They were cold and looked fragile. It struck Jaime that Sarah’s escape from vulnerability was a temporary one.
"The irony of my current situation doesn’t escape me, Jaime.," Sarah said, knowingly as she glanced at their hands.
"You should try and sleep.," Jaime said, not at all comfortable with the subject of Sarah’s impending death. She helped Sarah to her feet and watched the blonde climb into bed. Jaime walked over and helped Sarah with the covers. The look on Sarah’s face was full of amusement at the gesture.
"You going to read me a bedtime story now?," Sarah couldn’t resist teasing.
Jaime rolled her eyes and ignored Sarah as she walked out of the room. She could hear Sarah softly laughing as she walked to her room.
Sarah glanced over at the fire that was slowly growing dimmer as all of the wood was burned. She was craving the affection that Jaime was giving her more and more but instead of telling her that, she pushed her away. She supposed that part of it was the fact that she didn’t think she deserved it. She had done some bad things and had enjoyed doing them.
Jaime quietly slipped back into her room and let out an aggravated sigh at the sight that greeted her. Becca was currently splayed diagonally across the bed so that she was taking up the whole bed. Jaime poked Becca in the shoulder and was met with a soft snore from the teen. Jaime chewed on her lower lip as she debated what to do.
Sarah’s eyes swung back to the door as Jaime walked back into the room. Sarah said nothing as the brunette walked over to the side of the bed. Jaime pulled back the covers and sat down by Sarah who was currently in the middle of the bed just watching Jaime.
"Scoot over, Corvus.," Jaime said, playfully shoving the other woman. Sarah arched an eyebrow but obeyed as she made room for Jaime in the bed. Both women stared at the ceiling rather than look at each other.
"Becca is hogging the bed.," Jaime said in explanation.
"Sure she is.," Sarah said, glancing over at Jaime.
A moment later and Jaime was half on top of her. Sarah froze as Jaime leaned down and whispered in her ear. "That’s right, Sarah. I made the whole thing up just so I could come in here and fuck you."
Sarah shivered slightly. There was something really naughty about Jaime saying "fuck."
"Do me a favor, Sarah. Don’t flatter yourself."
Sarah’s eyes widened in disbelief as Jaime moved away from her and turned so that her back was to Sarah. Sarah quietly seethed not wanting Jaime to know she had gotten to her. It was going to be a long night.
bionic woman