Operation (Dancing lessons chapter 10)
Series: Dancing lessons
Chapter: 10
Written by: Parishs
Inspired by: zzzfreckles
Rating: pg
Summary: Luke realizes what has happened to him and Reid and breaks down (Luke's POV).
Sequel of the Yule challenge 2014: A Christmas wedding
Following the FFF prompt "Operation" (04-24-2015)
Disclaimer: I own nothing
PREVIOUS CHAPTER
A few times that night I woke up and didn’t know where I was, but when I smelled the unfamiliar scent of the guy who borrowed me his chest I remembered.
It was weird that we were so at easy with each other, that I felt my skin tingle wherever he touched me. That I didn’t seem to have inhibitions when we were together.
It made me a bit sad because I realized that if this was what love should do to you, I didn't know what Noah and I had been doing. I wanted to be with him so bad but it was never natural, we always seemed to clash, or struggle, I didn't find the right word to describe what we had but looking back it had been hard work, for him as well as for me.
He didn't like physical contact as much as I did so I waited till I read in his eyes that he wanted something from me. Maybe he thought the same about me, that I was a piece of work, that I needed things he couldn't give.
It didn't make me sad that I would never see him again, in a way it was a relieve that Reid couldn't save him. Before the kidnap we had a difficult relationship, whenever I saw him I felt guilty for breaking things up between us but I couldn't do it anymore, all the energy was gone and at the end I asked myself over and over again if I still loved him or just tried to hang on.
Looking back things were always so much simpler, now I lay in bed with someone else, someone I felt a crazy connection with, I understood that in a way I had tried to make my mother happy instead of myself. I knew how important Noah was to her, and how much she hoped that we would have a steady relationship, one thing she never had.
I don't know how many times she ran away from the farm after a fight but it was a lot, she created drama wherever she came. And now she wanted to arrange a funeral for Noah.
Of course it was a good thing, I knew she had loved him and he had loved her back, seeing her as the mother he never had, and who else would take care of this last moment for him? His father was in prison and he didn't have any family or close friends.
I knew for sure that I couldn't have done it, especially after what he had done to Reid. I wouldn't attend the funeral either; I wasn't prepared for a ceremony in which people would talk nicely about the man that once told me he loved me.
Thinking about Noah I felt a headache coming up, so I tried to relax my neck muscles but it didn't help. I went to the bathroom and looked into the mirror to ease my heartbeat. Noah had kidnapped Reid today and I thought everything was okay when Reid turned out to be fine but now, in the dark, my fear swept me off my feet.
What had happened to us? How could we just go home after that and eat something? Shower and make love as if nothing had happened? The muscles of my legs started to tremble and I had to hold myself on the sink or I would have fallen. How could he be so cold-blooded about this, my new lover? How could he sleep after something scary as a kidnap had happened to him?
Slowly the conversations we had had came back, in which he told me he had a son. We had been talking about it for a moment but standing on the cold tiles of a bathroom the impact of the subject hit me.
Reid had a son and he would be a part of my life as well. It was so unexpected and big that I felt a tear rolling down my cheek. "I am going to be a father", I whispered to myself in the mirror and I saw a spark in my eyes, a little flame that had been there all my life, waiting to be ignited into a fierce flame.
I always wanted to be a dad but being who I was I didn't think it would be a reality, I didn't see a possibility to make it happen and maybe when I was honest to myself I didn’t want to think about it when I was with Noah. Our relationship hadn’t been a good base for a kid, Noah ......
More tears welled up in my eyes and I let them fall on the sink, I didn’t try to suppress them anymore, my body needed to let go although I didn't understand why at this moment, for the first time I was really happy with a man who turned out to be a father and all I could do was cry.
I saw Reid enter the bathroom and I wanted to dry my tears with my hand but Reid embraced me in a tight grip.
"Let it out baby, you don't need to be embarrassed because everything is overwhelming you right now. I feel the exact same way, I have been crying when you were asleep. It has been such a terrible day for both of us".
I let my head rest against his shoulder and nodded.
"Yes it has, at first I was so relieved that you were okay but now I just think of all the things that could have gone wrong.
But it are good tears as well Reid, because I am so happy that you are okay and in my life. When I think about us and how wonderful I feel around you I get so sad because Noah and I never had that kind of a connection. And then I remembered that you told me you had a son and I always wanted to be a dad......it's all too much to handle at once".
He kissed my hair and nodded.
"Yes", he said softly, "it is, for me as well. The things I feel for you and my son, I have never had emotions that intense, in the past when I liked a guy I always fucked things up because somehow I didn't see myself trapped in a relationship, it seemed suffocating to me to be with one man who could claim my time. But since I met you I notice that I want to be with you and I miss you when you are not around. And after today....I could only hope that we both survived".
I looked at his image in the mirror and smiled.
"We are good together, right?", I said softly.
Reid pulled me against his chest and kissed my cheek.
"We are the best", he said. "But you have to come to bed with me, you are freezing out here, I feel goose bumps on your arms".
I nodded. "Yes I am coming with you. You need to sleep because you have to work in a few hours".
Reid shook his head. "No Luke, I called the hospital yesterday and told my boss what has happened. He already heard it on the news and ordered me to stay home for a couple of days until I was back on my feet again, so I have all the time in the world. What about you?".
I tried to remember what my planning for the day was. At my safe spot I had been working a little but I had no idea if I had something important to do today. Maybe the world needed to turn a few days without me, a huge operation kept the top of Grimaldi shipping busy but Damian and the staff would be able to manage the whole project without me. I was in no position to make responsible decisions.
"I guess I need a few days off as well", I said.
He smiled at me. "That’s a good thing Luke", he whispered. "We can hide in here and talk; maybe you can meet my son Tyler and his mom".
I nodded. "And maybe, when you are ready, you can talk to me about the kidnap, I want to know what has happened to Noah in the cabin".
Reid's face turned sad. "Yeah we are going to talk, but for now we are going to sleep Luke, come to bed with me so I can warm you up.
NEXT CHAPTER
Chapter: 10
Written by: Parishs
Inspired by: zzzfreckles
Rating: pg
Summary: Luke realizes what has happened to him and Reid and breaks down (Luke's POV).
Sequel of the Yule challenge 2014: A Christmas wedding
Following the FFF prompt "Operation" (04-24-2015)
Disclaimer: I own nothing
PREVIOUS CHAPTER
A few times that night I woke up and didn’t know where I was, but when I smelled the unfamiliar scent of the guy who borrowed me his chest I remembered.
It was weird that we were so at easy with each other, that I felt my skin tingle wherever he touched me. That I didn’t seem to have inhibitions when we were together.
It made me a bit sad because I realized that if this was what love should do to you, I didn't know what Noah and I had been doing. I wanted to be with him so bad but it was never natural, we always seemed to clash, or struggle, I didn't find the right word to describe what we had but looking back it had been hard work, for him as well as for me.
He didn't like physical contact as much as I did so I waited till I read in his eyes that he wanted something from me. Maybe he thought the same about me, that I was a piece of work, that I needed things he couldn't give.
It didn't make me sad that I would never see him again, in a way it was a relieve that Reid couldn't save him. Before the kidnap we had a difficult relationship, whenever I saw him I felt guilty for breaking things up between us but I couldn't do it anymore, all the energy was gone and at the end I asked myself over and over again if I still loved him or just tried to hang on.
Looking back things were always so much simpler, now I lay in bed with someone else, someone I felt a crazy connection with, I understood that in a way I had tried to make my mother happy instead of myself. I knew how important Noah was to her, and how much she hoped that we would have a steady relationship, one thing she never had.
I don't know how many times she ran away from the farm after a fight but it was a lot, she created drama wherever she came. And now she wanted to arrange a funeral for Noah.
Of course it was a good thing, I knew she had loved him and he had loved her back, seeing her as the mother he never had, and who else would take care of this last moment for him? His father was in prison and he didn't have any family or close friends.
I knew for sure that I couldn't have done it, especially after what he had done to Reid. I wouldn't attend the funeral either; I wasn't prepared for a ceremony in which people would talk nicely about the man that once told me he loved me.
Thinking about Noah I felt a headache coming up, so I tried to relax my neck muscles but it didn't help. I went to the bathroom and looked into the mirror to ease my heartbeat. Noah had kidnapped Reid today and I thought everything was okay when Reid turned out to be fine but now, in the dark, my fear swept me off my feet.
What had happened to us? How could we just go home after that and eat something? Shower and make love as if nothing had happened? The muscles of my legs started to tremble and I had to hold myself on the sink or I would have fallen. How could he be so cold-blooded about this, my new lover? How could he sleep after something scary as a kidnap had happened to him?
Slowly the conversations we had had came back, in which he told me he had a son. We had been talking about it for a moment but standing on the cold tiles of a bathroom the impact of the subject hit me.
Reid had a son and he would be a part of my life as well. It was so unexpected and big that I felt a tear rolling down my cheek. "I am going to be a father", I whispered to myself in the mirror and I saw a spark in my eyes, a little flame that had been there all my life, waiting to be ignited into a fierce flame.
I always wanted to be a dad but being who I was I didn't think it would be a reality, I didn't see a possibility to make it happen and maybe when I was honest to myself I didn’t want to think about it when I was with Noah. Our relationship hadn’t been a good base for a kid, Noah ......
More tears welled up in my eyes and I let them fall on the sink, I didn’t try to suppress them anymore, my body needed to let go although I didn't understand why at this moment, for the first time I was really happy with a man who turned out to be a father and all I could do was cry.
I saw Reid enter the bathroom and I wanted to dry my tears with my hand but Reid embraced me in a tight grip.
"Let it out baby, you don't need to be embarrassed because everything is overwhelming you right now. I feel the exact same way, I have been crying when you were asleep. It has been such a terrible day for both of us".
I let my head rest against his shoulder and nodded.
"Yes it has, at first I was so relieved that you were okay but now I just think of all the things that could have gone wrong.
But it are good tears as well Reid, because I am so happy that you are okay and in my life. When I think about us and how wonderful I feel around you I get so sad because Noah and I never had that kind of a connection. And then I remembered that you told me you had a son and I always wanted to be a dad......it's all too much to handle at once".
He kissed my hair and nodded.
"Yes", he said softly, "it is, for me as well. The things I feel for you and my son, I have never had emotions that intense, in the past when I liked a guy I always fucked things up because somehow I didn't see myself trapped in a relationship, it seemed suffocating to me to be with one man who could claim my time. But since I met you I notice that I want to be with you and I miss you when you are not around. And after today....I could only hope that we both survived".
I looked at his image in the mirror and smiled.
"We are good together, right?", I said softly.
Reid pulled me against his chest and kissed my cheek.
"We are the best", he said. "But you have to come to bed with me, you are freezing out here, I feel goose bumps on your arms".
I nodded. "Yes I am coming with you. You need to sleep because you have to work in a few hours".
Reid shook his head. "No Luke, I called the hospital yesterday and told my boss what has happened. He already heard it on the news and ordered me to stay home for a couple of days until I was back on my feet again, so I have all the time in the world. What about you?".
I tried to remember what my planning for the day was. At my safe spot I had been working a little but I had no idea if I had something important to do today. Maybe the world needed to turn a few days without me, a huge operation kept the top of Grimaldi shipping busy but Damian and the staff would be able to manage the whole project without me. I was in no position to make responsible decisions.
"I guess I need a few days off as well", I said.
He smiled at me. "That’s a good thing Luke", he whispered. "We can hide in here and talk; maybe you can meet my son Tyler and his mom".
I nodded. "And maybe, when you are ready, you can talk to me about the kidnap, I want to know what has happened to Noah in the cabin".
Reid's face turned sad. "Yeah we are going to talk, but for now we are going to sleep Luke, come to bed with me so I can warm you up.
NEXT CHAPTER