toxic first meeting

[pandastacia]

Pre-NaNo writing! Because if I ever run out of RushSimone scenes, I'll just end up writing some Present Time.
This is the continuation of that half scene I posted... a while ago. & it includes that first part, with some editing. :)
But between this & my next post, there is a huge time skip because there are so many scenes between this one & that one

Comments

[hikari_adams]

I need to go cry now....

I didn't find any places that needed work? It all seemed fine, though the parenthetical notes were a bit odd. Is there anything you can do to make them seem like they really belong?

...now, onto that crying...

[pandastacia]

Yeah, the phrases are odd, but they're supposed to go BAM! & look out of place. Because it's an almost subconscious thought.

OH NO DON'T CRY. D:

[xfucktheglasses]

This boy- his attitude, the way he just stood there while she tried to find...

Wouldn't it be "sat"? or "lied"? Coz he was lying down, right?

Other than that, I love this. And Rush.

Omfg. I have a reason to flail!

[pandastacia]

No, because he stood up sometime when she tripped over him & that scene, I believe? Because he leapt up to cover her mouth to stop her talking.

ME TOO.
I want one.
But less tragic. T_T

[xfucktheglasses]

But he leapt up after this sentence, I believe...?

*goes to reread*

[pandastacia]

... Yeah, I mixed up the sequence.
|goes to fix it|

[justlovely_9]

I liked it. You make everything seem so mysterious but you sort of get the way everything is going. They're just running away from everything to some goal which cannot be handed to them just like that.
It's sort of...refreshing?

[pandastacia]

I'm not sure you'll continue to think this is refreshing... It continues & it gets more beautiful but uglier- all at once.
That's one way to look at it? They're running away because they're restricted- to Simone, she feels bound to an ugly world where it's all about who knows what about who & that she never feels safe, in a way.

[justlovely_9]

I dunno I just think it's something new to really look into. I think it sort of gives you a new point of view of how other people see everything. I sort of just like anything that's new and gives you a feeling of the situation?

Are you allowed to start writing for NaNo before November?

[pandastacia]

You'll see. ;) You could look at other parts of this that I wrote earlier in the year & am rewriting completely for NaNo? Because it addresses more closely what went on here. There are a lot of gaps, since I basically wrote whatever scenes I felt like writing.
& this doesn't count for NaNo? I have so much of Toxic to write that I'm just finishing this, which is a scene I wrote two months before I decided to do this for NaNo.

[theycallmeriz]

the main reason i am excited for nanowrimo is because it means at least FIFTY THOUSAND WORDS ON RUSH AND SIMONE.
i have loved them ever since you explained their tragic tragic tragic life for me.

i thought the boy on the beach was rush in the last extract. but i like it being wes and the simone-rush interaction being more... private? so is this the first time they've met? wow. instant connection or what! :)

btw, when your midterms are done with, i'd VERY MUCH LOVE to tell you the brief outline i have for my nanowrimo story. it's... a little twisted if i'm completely honest but i reckon it'll be really fun to write.

have you read God's Own Country by Ross Raisin? if you liked A Clockwork Orange you will love it to pieces. though a dictionary will be necessary for the Yorkshire Slang. and also... the lack of speech marks in it is really weird.

[pandastacia]

Hahaha. Hopefully, I'll finish NaNo & you'll be able to see the blow by blow.
Veryyyyy exciting!!! :D

Yup, that was Wes. Rush isn't the type that wants to lead a group of boys for something like that? & I'm working from this tolerance of each other to friendship to love. =D

No problem! I'll be done after seven tonight my time, so I could probably talk to you about it tomorrow? I'm really excited to see what it is then! :3

It sounds interesting! I've never read "A Clockwork Orange", but some people in my AP English class last year did a presentation on it & it sounded like something of a mindfuck in a good way.

[cutecrazyice]

♥ This will be your nanowrimo piece?

♥♥♥♥ I could just die happily reading this. For real. :D

[pandastacia]

Yeah, I'm writing it for NaNo. :D
It's the intro to one part of it? It's not the whole story, but... It's complicated. This is about the Past part of the story, which is what I'll be writing for NaNo. The Present part I'm going to try & write post-NaNo.

OH NO DON'T DIE!!! D: