Comments | p_p_t_h: So, are the students the parasites?

dr_gregoryhouse in p_p_t_h

So, are the students the parasites?

Mar 30, 2006 05:58

Who: House; open.
Where: Vogler Conference Room.
What: Class for Infectious and Parasitic diseases.
When: Monday, March 27th, 2006; 10.30AM.
[OOC note: Because writing a class scene with House takes an obscene amount of concentration, I'm doing it in bits and posting the bits in, well, bits. If you want to tag into this scene, do so whenever you ( Read more... )

open, medicine, house, cuddy, class

Comments 18

dr_gregoryhouse March 29 2006, 18:57:52 UTC

“Ancylostoma duodenale, or Necator americanus,” the same student obnoxiously continued.

House gave him a wary look. This kid was pretentious, or so House had immediately decided. He was already getting annoyed with him. He loathed pretentious people. “You know, you could just say hookworm.”

Dismissively turning his attention away from him, House opened his mouth to say something else to the class, when the same student spoke up yet again. “Ascaris lumbricoides.” The student paused. He then added obnoxiously, “Or roundworm. As it’s commonly known as.”

House pulled an exasperated look of impatience. “I know what it is. You could rattle off the beginner’s digest of commonly known parasites and pathogens if you really feel the need to sound more impressive than you really are. But you’re gonna be hard pressed, ‘cos you’re certainly not impressing me.” He shrugged, and then suggested in mock-helpfulness, “Or you could just shut up, but something tells me you like the sound of your own voice too much to do something as wise as that ( ... )

dr_gregoryhouse March 29 2006, 18:58:29 UTC

“Gardnerella vaginalis,” another student then offered; a male student with rather bad acne on his cheeks and forehead ( ... )

dr_gregoryhouse March 29 2006, 18:59:09 UTC

“Babies…?” asked Pretentious Pocket Protector, incredulously.

House stopped pacing and turned to the student, a feigned a look of surprise on his face. “Babies? Wow. That’s a rather bland term for you, isn’t it?”

Pretentious Pocket Protector ignored House’s dry comeback. “What’s babies got to do with Gardnerella vaginalis?”

House pointed at the student with acne with his cane. “I never said he was right. I said he was the closest out of all of you to being right.”

“Yes, but what’s it got to do with it?”

“You have to get to the vagina in order to potentially make a baby. Or, in this case, a parasite. That’s loosely what Gardnerella vaginalis has to do with it.” The student opened his mouth to say something against that, but House cut him off with, “You know, the correct question would be, what’s babies got to do with a class on infectious and parasitic diseases.”

Pretentious Pocket Protector gave House an uncertain look. “Okay. What’s babies got to do with a class on infectious and parasitic diseases?”

dr_gregoryhouse March 29 2006, 19:00:20 UTC

House smiled condescendingly. “Nothing. I just wanted to see how quick you all were at understanding things that appear complicated on the surface, but have a simple answer underneath.” He then cast them all a frank look. “You all failed. Miserably.” He noted some of the off-guard looks the students were giving him. “Which is to be expected,” he continued, resuming pacing again. “You’re all babies in the medical world, after all. Or, if you want me to play on words a bit, parasitesHe paced to the middle of the podium and then turned around to face them, his expression frank again. “Let’s just hope you learn to eventually stop failing. Because you can all come up with the fanciest answers in the world in the name of looking clever--” he cast Pretentious Pocket Protector a pointed look “--or in the name of grasping at straws, but unless you know your bases and learn to understand that things aren’t always as straight cut as they can seem, you’re gonna have a lot of blood on your hands if you plan on being doctors that come anywhere near ( ... )

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