Wish 3 for cmk418
Wish 3
Request 1:
Pairing/Character(s): Bob Rebadow & Agamemnon Busmalis
Keyword/Prompt Phrase: “This is better than playing cards in the quad.” Rebadow, not Alvarez, accompanies Busmalis when he escapes.
Canon/AU/Either: AU
Special Requests: Humor
Story/Art/Either: Story
by colleendetroit
Simple Pleasures
* * *
"BUSMALIS!"
No answer.
"REBADOW!"
Silence.
"Oh for fuck's sake," the chatter on the walkie-talkie began. "We've got a problem here."
In his managerial office within the drab walls of Oswald Correctional Facility, Tim McManus leaned forward, the sudden break in an uncharacteristically boring shift catching his attention.
"What's the issue?" squawked a C.O. on the line.
"Where the hell are Busmalis and Rebadow? They're not in their pod. Something's not right here."
McManus picked up his walkie-talkie and began pacing. He didn't like the sound of this. How could they not be there? He pressed the button and responded. "What's going on?!"
Beeps and clicks interrupted each other, along with rushed commands and yelling.
"We might have an escape here, lock everything down. EVERYTHING!"
Alarms rang out across the prison.
Doors to offices swung open, beacon lights spun.
This was Oz.
* * *
"Oh, Bob, this is the best."
Bob Rebadow smiled.
"The BEST!" Agamemnon Busmalis mumbled behind a mouthful of food. "It's been too long."
Bob flipped a second burger on the grill. "Enjoy it while it lasts, Agamemnon, I don't see how we can get much farther."
He pulled a garlic seasoning shaker off the metal shelf above the industrial stove. It wasn't his kitchen at home, but it would do. It had indeed been too long since Bob had enjoyed the simple pleasure of grilling a mouth-watering burger.
It was a pity the deep fryer wasn't on, he mused. Fries sounded delicious.
* * *
"Right here! Come over here!" the C.O. hollered.
At once, four officers crowded the doorway of the hospital storage room. There, behind a pile of custodial equipment, was the means of escape. The call rang out, "We found a tunnel!"
He was halfway down the hall when McManus realized what was going on. ‘The Mole strikes again,' he thought.
Glaring Tim's way, Warden Glynn stomped past. "This is going to be a shit show, McManus! A SHIT SHOW!"
* * *
There was a knock on the window. Rebadow and Busmalis froze.
"Hello? Are you in there?"
"Oh, God," Bob whispered. They'd only been out for a few hours, he had hoped it would have lasted longer than this.
Another knock. "Listen, I know it's late and you guys are probably closed," a voice called out, "but I sure could use a bite to eat. It's been a long ride, and I just can't go any further without some grub."
Busmalis stood up from behind the counter and started walking to the door.
"What are you doing?!" Rebadow called out harshly.
A young man was peering into window. Agamemnon turned to Bob and smiled. "The register is empty. We need cash. He's hungry. This is easy math here, Bob."
"You're crazy!"
"Did God tell you that?" Busmalis playfully mocked. "Did he also teach you how to turn water into wine, because that would really come in handy! We could make a fortune!" He pulled the door open a crack. "Hey kid, we ARE closed and the power is giving us some trouble tonight - BUT - we could maybe get a burger or two in you."
"Oh wow, that's great, thank you, guys. How about four? I'll need some for the road."
"I think we can do that."
"Well-done would be great."
"Onions?"
"Hell yes."
Bob could hear the exchange. "Oh no," he said to the crackling grill.
Busmalis turned to Rebadow and smiled. "Four hockey pucks to-go, and make ‘em cry, Bob-o!"
* * *
"How long have they been gone??"
No one could quite say, and no one was quite ready to admit that out loud.
Warden Glynn slammed his fist on the counter. "Surely two old farts like Rebadow and Busmalis can't get too far! Are we even sure they're not still here in Oz?"
Officer Sean Murphy stepped to the side, leaning in to Tim. "I guess they went home to Auntie Em," he whispered. Only Tim heard.
"Busmalis is a digger," Tim offered, "but we didn't think giving him access to the supply closet was going to be an issue. He's low-risk overall…" McManus trailed off.
A knock on the door frame saved him from an awkward silence, and a S.O.R.T. officer peered in. "We're ready to do a full sweep, Warden."
"Do it!" he growled back.
* * *
Rebadow did his best to clean up after himself, scrubbing the spatulas clean and wiping down the counter.
"Eighty bucks, Bob! Eighty bucks!" Agamemnon counted out the bills. "This is better than playing cards in the quad! The most I ever made in EmCity was seven dollars! That was a great day."
"There are no great days in Oz," Bob argued, "but I get it."
As it turned out, the young man hanging out in front of the burger joint caught the eye of a few other weary travelers and at the end of their short-lived shift as a greasy spoon chef and manager, Bob and Agamemnon had easily sold over a dozen burgers. How no one questioned any of this happening in the middle of the night, they couldn't understand - but were indeed thankful for.
"And one guy traded a pair of binoculars!"
Bob look confused. "Binoculars? Traded? How, and why?"
Busmalis pulled the strap over his head. "The one who ordered the last burger needed a coat. I found one in the basket in the back, it looked like lost and found."
"It may have looked like it, but you don't know for sure. It wasn't yours to give," Rebadow said piously.
"Neither were the burgers, but overall, this was a pretty petty break-in here. It won't even make the papers."
"It will if they find us."
"You're right. Let's get the hell out of here."
As they closed the door behind them and hurried down the foggy road into the night, Bob looked over at Agamemnon with the binoculars around his neck, smiling like a cat that ate the canary.
"Why do you even need those?"
Agamemnon sighed breathlessly. "For our next stop!"
Confused, Bob shook his head. "Are we bird watching? At night? On the lam???"
"I've only got one chickie on my mind, Bob, and these babies are gonna get me a front row seat."
It was then that Rebadow knew exactly where they were headed. "Busmalis, no, we can't. We'll get caught for sure!"
Agamemnon didn't care, no one would be able to keep him away from his one true love: MISS SALLY. "Miss Sally," he sighed again. "Oh, for you, it will be worth it!"
For better or worse, Rebadow knew following the Mole through that tunnel was going to be an adventure - and it seemed to have just begun.
Bob groaned, "I should have known."
* * *
This entry was originally posted at https://oz-magi.dreamwidth.org/248728.html.