LOVE.
Title: SBS Love Photoshoot
Pairing: G-Ri (Jiyong/Seungri)
Author: oxygenlove
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Ji's thinking too much. Ri simplifies for him.
AN: So, another installment in the AGREEMENT SERIES ( 1, 2&3, 4). This is the 5th and like the others, this can be read alone without the other parts. But it will be better if you read the other parts, just to understand what the agreement is all about.
AGREEMENT SERIES
SBS LOVE PHOTOSHOOT
If the agreement is written in paper, it would have been ripped apart by now. It would have been long gone into oblivion, garbage, a million tiny pieces. But it is not. It is written with feelings bottled up, with promises kept in hiding and sacrifices for the future. So you cannot rip it apart without ripping apart yourself with it. And so the agreement remains, still, always a shadow over your head, an alarm inside your mind and a tight grip on your barely beating heart.
He... he looks different today. And no, it doesn't have anything to do with that crazy hair of his. Rather it has everything to do with the dull look in his eyes and the half-felt smile on his face. The shine in his eyes is not present (the shine that you love so much) and the smile that he is showing seems too forced, not genuine and it pains you. You are worried.
Like you always are.
You close your eyes then, the sound of the open television reaching your ears but not quite making it to your thinking mind because damn it. You are still worried like hell. Because even though you don't show it, even though you don't say it, your mind is always filled with thoughts of Kwon Jiyong, and how much you so want to rip that non-existent paper. But that paper is-
Someone sits beside you on the couch.
You don't open your eyes because you know who it is. Just by the feel of his presence you know who it is. Just by the heavy feeling it gives you, that strange longing to reach out and touch him, that unexplainable need to need him... you know it's him. It can only be him. So you keep your hands to your side, tightly.
"Hyung, can you please move to the other side?"
One, two, three, four seconds and you feel and hear him move, sliding to the opposite end of the couch, making your need multiply by two, your longing by three and that heavy feeling by a hundred.
"This feels familiar," he says from his end. His tone is light and conversational. He's trying his best. You should too.
"Yeah. I remember, hyung. Only it isn't the same house, it isn't the same couch. And it will never be the same us," you curse yourself because your voice quivers, stutters and you close your eyes harder, hurting a little, as if you can block his presence by doing so.
"Yeah! This- this time is different," he laughs, it sounds awkward and you close your eyes tighter. They hurt. "Very different."
You nod your head, letting the seconds pass, then minutes. He's changed the channel to some unknown and insignificant show and you don't really care because it isn't important. Your eyes are really starting to sting and you tell yourself it's because of the pressure from closing them too tightly (yeah, right, fool yourself because you're so good at doing it already anyway) and you let your head hit the back of the couch, moving, trying not to pay attention to the figure on the other end who is shaking your heart, making it beat faster faster faster by the second.
"...very different," he murmurs. It's so soft that you open your eyes (finally). The white ceiling greets you and black spots hurt your vision. You shake your head once, twice and turn to look at him. He's looking at the television screen straight ahead and repeats the words again and again and again. Like it's not minutes ago that the conversation for it has ended. "... very different, very different, very different."
"Hyung..." you say, like you always do. Because this is one of those times again. One of those times that all you can say is 'hyung' because...
Because this is one of those times when you so fucking want to reach out and grab him, touch him and hold him and beg him to hug you, wrap his arms around you and say, fucking say that he needs you, like how you need him. But you can't, no you can't. So you say 'hyung' instead of asking him for stupid and unreasonable favors like loving you so much, like kissing you so much, like making lo-
"Do you like Youngbae?"
.
.
.
And you feel your heart stop beating. He's still looking straight ahead and he's changing the channels again, flipping through the shows, stopping randomly every now and then. And he's smiling. There's a broken smile on his handsome face and you can't feel your heart.
So that's why. So that's why he's been like this. Ah.
"I said, do you- do you like Youngba- bae? he stutters, his voice cracking, breaking when he said the singer's name. He's still flipping through the channels, not really noticing (or caring) that he's passed this cooking show thrice already.
"Hyung... what do you mean?" But you perfectly know what he means. And that's why it hurts more.
"I just, meant... asked if maybe, you know. You like Youngbae. Because," he swallows, "because he- he's, you, he, I mean. It's okay, really. Seung- seungri if, it's okay if, you like him. I mean, if, you, yeah, I mean, if you like him, it's o -okay."
"Hyung..." and yes, this is one of those moments again. Your voice does not break because this time, your heart's the one that's breaking. Seeing him like this... you clench your fists because no, you can't. You fucking can't. Understand? You. Can't. Reach. Out. And. Hold. Him.
"It's okay, Seungriyah~ it's okay," and he's choking now and no, he can't cry now, please, "It's okay. It happens, I mean, he is really, yeah. I mean, I should have seen it, should have expected it. I mean, you dislike on-cam skinship, even with me. Expecially with me," he winces, you fall deeper, "But he's the only one, Youngbae's the only one you are okay with. You- you're even the one who initiates it with him. You-" he looks at you then and yes, he's crying and the sting in your eyes is getting unbearable and you clench your fists tighter. Tighter. Because you can't. Even now? Yes.
"Hyung, no-"
"-you like him. More than me. I mean, you like hi- him and not... not me. And it's okay, really, I understand. I understand if you've fallen for him. It's not hard, not that hard to do so," he looks at you harder, stares and you can't fucking understand him now, "Seungriyah~ if you've gotten tired of me, of this- this stupid thing between us, it's okay, it's okay, it's okay..."
And with every 'it's okay' it's not okay more and more because he thinks- his twisted mind thinks-
"Seungriyah~ it's okay, it's okay..."
"It's not okay."
"It's okay. No, no, it's okay. It's okay that he's the one you tell your problems to, the one you put your arms around to, the one you pick for interviews, the one you lean in to for a kiss, the one you like so much you admit you're attracted to him in national television. And it's okay, it's okay that you two will be together for a month or so... somewhere. It's okay that the you will improve your passion for dancing... together. It's okay and I'm okay, really I'm-"
"-stupid."
"- okay."
"You're stupid, hyung."
"I'm okay- what?"
You want to punch yourself now as you see him so broken and confused at the other end of the couch, holding the remote control, changing the channels absently while looking at you and it really fucking hurts. Because... because the pain you're feeling is not enough, not enough, can never be enough to match how many times you've hurt him, made him cry. So you clear your throat, making sure you can say all of this right before the stinging in your eyes turn to tears.
"I said you're stupid, Kwon Jiyong."
"You mean I'm wrong?"
"Yes, wrong. I knew it. I knew you've been worried and I've been worried as hell. I knew it. But I thought we understand each other. I thought you said no words and explanations are needed between us?" you ask him, the stinging in your eyes now transferred to your heart.
"Seungri, I know, but-"
"There's no but, hyung. No words, no explanations. Youngbae hyung? Sure, yes, I like him but why are you so jealous that you'd think that? Hyung! You can't be seriously thinking that because- because..."
"But-"
"... because you don't fucking know how much I want to hold you, touch you every second of every day. You don't have any idea how much you make me crazy just by being so near and yet so unreachable. You have- no- have no idea, hyung, how much I need you at night beside me. How much I want you, want you so bad, hyung," and your heart's clenching so tight it's so hard to breathe and you're clenching your fists tighter because they are itching so bad to grab and hold him. Now.
"Seungri- what?"
"Hyung, you- you have no idea how much I am still so fucking in love with you, still so fucking in love with you," and you're heart's going to burst because the words just fell off your lips like that, like water, so freely, so easily and you hate it, "You have no idea hyung. No idea."
And there is silence as you try to catch your slipping sanity, as you try to take your mind back, gather enough control because you know you've done it again. You've let your guards down again. And you're just going to end up hurting him. Again.
And there's movement as he's in front of you suddenly, kneeling on the floor, his eyes still wet with tears but they're shining now, that glow you love so much back again and he looks so perfect it takes all your will power not to move your hands, cup his face and bring it closer to yours- and kiss him.
"What did you say?" he whispers, a happy note in his voice now. You smile.
And of course this is it. This is it. This is the moment when you need to take it all back, say it didn't happen, deny you said anything, this is it. But you don't. No, not this time. Just this time, you'll hurt him less.
"You heard me, hyung. Don't make me say it again," you tell him and he smiles too then, a smile that's real and bright and it blinds you, scares you that you think he looks so damn perfect and he's all yours, all yours.
"I'm still so in love with you too," a whisper from him. He said it with his eyes on yours and it sounds so sincere, so heart-felt, so... Kwon Jiyong. And suddeny his left hand is in front of you, his arm outstretched, quivering a little, maybe nervous but sure. "Touch me."
You understand what he means and yet you're so confused. He wants you to... touch him. Now. Now that there's no one else, now that you're still vulnerable and you haven't gathered enough control just yet. You think this is cheating, because he attacts you on moments when he knows you can't say no, when he's so broken and hopeful and so damn longing for you. Like right now. Yes, cheater. But you like it.
"Hyung, don't start it again," you tell him but you clench your fists tighter, digging your nails into your palm harder. They really do itch. They itch so bad. They want to touch Kwon Jiyong so bad.
"Please, Seungri. It's just the two of us. It's just you and me," he moves his arm closer to you and you look at it, "It's okay, don't worry."
"Hyung, I'm- I'm so torn," you look at him again, raising your right hand now, moving it towards his but not too near, no, not too near. Can't be too near.
"Please, Seungri, please. I'm not asking you to kiss me. Just hold my hand, just..." he stares harder, his eyes boring into you, willing you, "... just hold my hand, Seungri. That's all I want."
"Hyung, I can't," but you let your hand move right above his in the air and you feel his warmth on your open palm and you want more. More. This is why. This is why it's so dangerous to be too near him. Because when you do you want more and more and more and more..."I can't."
"Yes, you can't. You shouldn't. But Seungri, just please hold my hand now," and you feel his eyes look down on your hand hovering above his and he watches it hesitate, waiting for you to touch him, finally give in, "You shouldn't, Seungri. But you want to."
"I want to," you agree. Hell, yes.
"Yes, and I want you to, please," he pleads and you feel your will slowly dissolving into thin air because you can see how much he wants it (and hell you want it, too) and his presence so close like this...
"But..." and you move your right hand past his outstretched arm and his eyes widen as you move it closer to his face and he closes his eyes, waiting, his breathing becoming shallow, "But..."
"Seungri, what are you doing?" he whispers, eyes closed, and you move your fingers, letting them skim along his skin, fleeting through his cheek, slowly caressing his soft flesh. He sighs. "What are you..."
"I don't know, hyung. I don't know what," and yet you're moving your fingers, finally touching him, cupping his face, your thumb moving across his lips and he trembles. Yes. "Hyung, I don't know."
And yet you do. Because you lean in closer, bringing his face closer to you. You close your eyes too as your lips touches his and you know that he knows too. Because he's kissing you back, moving his lips against yours as his left hand moves towards his cheek and covers your right hand cupping it. Yes, he knows.
And you decide in your head that this is so perfect because you're kissing your Jiyong hyung and he's kissing you back and you both know your feelings are still the same, still so real, still so deep, still so in love with each other. And you smile into the kiss because this is so fucking not like you, so not like him, so not like the two of you.
Confessing? Kissing? No. Not like you two.
But.
------------
You smile as he tightens his hold on your hand. He's sitting beside you on the couch now, flipping through the channels again. His face illuminated by the television screen's glow that he looks so unnaturally gorgeous so you squeeze his hand back as you close your eyes again, leaning back to let your head thump against the couch's back. He's still looking for something interesting to watch as you hear the voices changing from the television set now and then but you're not interested at all.
Because... because now you know what's been bothering him. Jealousy. It's cute. But stupid. How can he think that you'll just fall out of love for him like that? How can he think you'll replace him with anyone when all you ever really want is to hold him?
And damn. If that agreement is written in paper, it would have been really ripped apart by now. Because it's getting really hard following by its unspoken rules, so hard trying to control feelings, to keep the longing, to hide the need. So hard.
He suddenly moves beside you and lays his head on your lap, snuggling into you. You crack an eye open, the television is showing that cooking show from earlier and he's taken his feet up to lay properly on the couch, making you his human pillow. Ah. You close your eyes again and smile, he's still holding your hand, holding it close to him. It warms your heart.
Yes, it's getting really really hard.
AN: Finally! Something! Sorry if it's crap this time. It's so hard to write using paper first and then not typing it in my own comp. Chapter 7 of SONGS. will be up when I finish writing it. Sorry tor all the readers!
AN2: If you're interested. This is why I haven't been updating much. We're moving houses! Two weeks ago, we moved to our aunt for a while while my dad works on the new house then last week we moved to another city to tend to my dad's store while he is still finishing the new house. It should be done by the end of April. I hope. Our computer is in the new house already, to be reassembled when there's already electricity there. I miss my computer. It has my BB stuff in it. Vids and songs and it feels so different sitting in another person's comp. I can't type anything... I am failure. Anyway, I hope I get my old comp back. And I'll continute to write stuff and post them even if it feels uneasy typing it somewhere else. Hope you guys understand!
AN3: I need my fix of really angsty as hell GRi fics!!!!
Pairing: G-Ri (Jiyong/Seungri)
Author: oxygenlove
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Ji's thinking too much. Ri simplifies for him.
AN: So, another installment in the AGREEMENT SERIES ( 1, 2&3, 4). This is the 5th and like the others, this can be read alone without the other parts. But it will be better if you read the other parts, just to understand what the agreement is all about.
AGREEMENT SERIES
SBS LOVE PHOTOSHOOT
If the agreement is written in paper, it would have been ripped apart by now. It would have been long gone into oblivion, garbage, a million tiny pieces. But it is not. It is written with feelings bottled up, with promises kept in hiding and sacrifices for the future. So you cannot rip it apart without ripping apart yourself with it. And so the agreement remains, still, always a shadow over your head, an alarm inside your mind and a tight grip on your barely beating heart.
He... he looks different today. And no, it doesn't have anything to do with that crazy hair of his. Rather it has everything to do with the dull look in his eyes and the half-felt smile on his face. The shine in his eyes is not present (the shine that you love so much) and the smile that he is showing seems too forced, not genuine and it pains you. You are worried.
Like you always are.
You close your eyes then, the sound of the open television reaching your ears but not quite making it to your thinking mind because damn it. You are still worried like hell. Because even though you don't show it, even though you don't say it, your mind is always filled with thoughts of Kwon Jiyong, and how much you so want to rip that non-existent paper. But that paper is-
Someone sits beside you on the couch.
You don't open your eyes because you know who it is. Just by the feel of his presence you know who it is. Just by the heavy feeling it gives you, that strange longing to reach out and touch him, that unexplainable need to need him... you know it's him. It can only be him. So you keep your hands to your side, tightly.
"Hyung, can you please move to the other side?"
One, two, three, four seconds and you feel and hear him move, sliding to the opposite end of the couch, making your need multiply by two, your longing by three and that heavy feeling by a hundred.
"This feels familiar," he says from his end. His tone is light and conversational. He's trying his best. You should too.
"Yeah. I remember, hyung. Only it isn't the same house, it isn't the same couch. And it will never be the same us," you curse yourself because your voice quivers, stutters and you close your eyes harder, hurting a little, as if you can block his presence by doing so.
"Yeah! This- this time is different," he laughs, it sounds awkward and you close your eyes tighter. They hurt. "Very different."
You nod your head, letting the seconds pass, then minutes. He's changed the channel to some unknown and insignificant show and you don't really care because it isn't important. Your eyes are really starting to sting and you tell yourself it's because of the pressure from closing them too tightly (yeah, right, fool yourself because you're so good at doing it already anyway) and you let your head hit the back of the couch, moving, trying not to pay attention to the figure on the other end who is shaking your heart, making it beat faster faster faster by the second.
"...very different," he murmurs. It's so soft that you open your eyes (finally). The white ceiling greets you and black spots hurt your vision. You shake your head once, twice and turn to look at him. He's looking at the television screen straight ahead and repeats the words again and again and again. Like it's not minutes ago that the conversation for it has ended. "... very different, very different, very different."
"Hyung..." you say, like you always do. Because this is one of those times again. One of those times that all you can say is 'hyung' because...
Because this is one of those times when you so fucking want to reach out and grab him, touch him and hold him and beg him to hug you, wrap his arms around you and say, fucking say that he needs you, like how you need him. But you can't, no you can't. So you say 'hyung' instead of asking him for stupid and unreasonable favors like loving you so much, like kissing you so much, like making lo-
"Do you like Youngbae?"
.
.
.
And you feel your heart stop beating. He's still looking straight ahead and he's changing the channels again, flipping through the shows, stopping randomly every now and then. And he's smiling. There's a broken smile on his handsome face and you can't feel your heart.
So that's why. So that's why he's been like this. Ah.
"I said, do you- do you like Youngba- bae? he stutters, his voice cracking, breaking when he said the singer's name. He's still flipping through the channels, not really noticing (or caring) that he's passed this cooking show thrice already.
"Hyung... what do you mean?" But you perfectly know what he means. And that's why it hurts more.
"I just, meant... asked if maybe, you know. You like Youngbae. Because," he swallows, "because he- he's, you, he, I mean. It's okay, really. Seung- seungri if, it's okay if, you like him. I mean, if, you, yeah, I mean, if you like him, it's o -okay."
"Hyung..." and yes, this is one of those moments again. Your voice does not break because this time, your heart's the one that's breaking. Seeing him like this... you clench your fists because no, you can't. You fucking can't. Understand? You. Can't. Reach. Out. And. Hold. Him.
"It's okay, Seungriyah~ it's okay," and he's choking now and no, he can't cry now, please, "It's okay. It happens, I mean, he is really, yeah. I mean, I should have seen it, should have expected it. I mean, you dislike on-cam skinship, even with me. Expecially with me," he winces, you fall deeper, "But he's the only one, Youngbae's the only one you are okay with. You- you're even the one who initiates it with him. You-" he looks at you then and yes, he's crying and the sting in your eyes is getting unbearable and you clench your fists tighter. Tighter. Because you can't. Even now? Yes.
"Hyung, no-"
"-you like him. More than me. I mean, you like hi- him and not... not me. And it's okay, really, I understand. I understand if you've fallen for him. It's not hard, not that hard to do so," he looks at you harder, stares and you can't fucking understand him now, "Seungriyah~ if you've gotten tired of me, of this- this stupid thing between us, it's okay, it's okay, it's okay..."
And with every 'it's okay' it's not okay more and more because he thinks- his twisted mind thinks-
"Seungriyah~ it's okay, it's okay..."
"It's not okay."
"It's okay. No, no, it's okay. It's okay that he's the one you tell your problems to, the one you put your arms around to, the one you pick for interviews, the one you lean in to for a kiss, the one you like so much you admit you're attracted to him in national television. And it's okay, it's okay that you two will be together for a month or so... somewhere. It's okay that the you will improve your passion for dancing... together. It's okay and I'm okay, really I'm-"
"-stupid."
"- okay."
"You're stupid, hyung."
"I'm okay- what?"
You want to punch yourself now as you see him so broken and confused at the other end of the couch, holding the remote control, changing the channels absently while looking at you and it really fucking hurts. Because... because the pain you're feeling is not enough, not enough, can never be enough to match how many times you've hurt him, made him cry. So you clear your throat, making sure you can say all of this right before the stinging in your eyes turn to tears.
"I said you're stupid, Kwon Jiyong."
"You mean I'm wrong?"
"Yes, wrong. I knew it. I knew you've been worried and I've been worried as hell. I knew it. But I thought we understand each other. I thought you said no words and explanations are needed between us?" you ask him, the stinging in your eyes now transferred to your heart.
"Seungri, I know, but-"
"There's no but, hyung. No words, no explanations. Youngbae hyung? Sure, yes, I like him but why are you so jealous that you'd think that? Hyung! You can't be seriously thinking that because- because..."
"But-"
"... because you don't fucking know how much I want to hold you, touch you every second of every day. You don't have any idea how much you make me crazy just by being so near and yet so unreachable. You have- no- have no idea, hyung, how much I need you at night beside me. How much I want you, want you so bad, hyung," and your heart's clenching so tight it's so hard to breathe and you're clenching your fists tighter because they are itching so bad to grab and hold him. Now.
"Seungri- what?"
"Hyung, you- you have no idea how much I am still so fucking in love with you, still so fucking in love with you," and you're heart's going to burst because the words just fell off your lips like that, like water, so freely, so easily and you hate it, "You have no idea hyung. No idea."
And there is silence as you try to catch your slipping sanity, as you try to take your mind back, gather enough control because you know you've done it again. You've let your guards down again. And you're just going to end up hurting him. Again.
And there's movement as he's in front of you suddenly, kneeling on the floor, his eyes still wet with tears but they're shining now, that glow you love so much back again and he looks so perfect it takes all your will power not to move your hands, cup his face and bring it closer to yours- and kiss him.
"What did you say?" he whispers, a happy note in his voice now. You smile.
And of course this is it. This is it. This is the moment when you need to take it all back, say it didn't happen, deny you said anything, this is it. But you don't. No, not this time. Just this time, you'll hurt him less.
"You heard me, hyung. Don't make me say it again," you tell him and he smiles too then, a smile that's real and bright and it blinds you, scares you that you think he looks so damn perfect and he's all yours, all yours.
"I'm still so in love with you too," a whisper from him. He said it with his eyes on yours and it sounds so sincere, so heart-felt, so... Kwon Jiyong. And suddeny his left hand is in front of you, his arm outstretched, quivering a little, maybe nervous but sure. "Touch me."
You understand what he means and yet you're so confused. He wants you to... touch him. Now. Now that there's no one else, now that you're still vulnerable and you haven't gathered enough control just yet. You think this is cheating, because he attacts you on moments when he knows you can't say no, when he's so broken and hopeful and so damn longing for you. Like right now. Yes, cheater. But you like it.
"Hyung, don't start it again," you tell him but you clench your fists tighter, digging your nails into your palm harder. They really do itch. They itch so bad. They want to touch Kwon Jiyong so bad.
"Please, Seungri. It's just the two of us. It's just you and me," he moves his arm closer to you and you look at it, "It's okay, don't worry."
"Hyung, I'm- I'm so torn," you look at him again, raising your right hand now, moving it towards his but not too near, no, not too near. Can't be too near.
"Please, Seungri, please. I'm not asking you to kiss me. Just hold my hand, just..." he stares harder, his eyes boring into you, willing you, "... just hold my hand, Seungri. That's all I want."
"Hyung, I can't," but you let your hand move right above his in the air and you feel his warmth on your open palm and you want more. More. This is why. This is why it's so dangerous to be too near him. Because when you do you want more and more and more and more..."I can't."
"Yes, you can't. You shouldn't. But Seungri, just please hold my hand now," and you feel his eyes look down on your hand hovering above his and he watches it hesitate, waiting for you to touch him, finally give in, "You shouldn't, Seungri. But you want to."
"I want to," you agree. Hell, yes.
"Yes, and I want you to, please," he pleads and you feel your will slowly dissolving into thin air because you can see how much he wants it (and hell you want it, too) and his presence so close like this...
"But..." and you move your right hand past his outstretched arm and his eyes widen as you move it closer to his face and he closes his eyes, waiting, his breathing becoming shallow, "But..."
"Seungri, what are you doing?" he whispers, eyes closed, and you move your fingers, letting them skim along his skin, fleeting through his cheek, slowly caressing his soft flesh. He sighs. "What are you..."
"I don't know, hyung. I don't know what," and yet you're moving your fingers, finally touching him, cupping his face, your thumb moving across his lips and he trembles. Yes. "Hyung, I don't know."
And yet you do. Because you lean in closer, bringing his face closer to you. You close your eyes too as your lips touches his and you know that he knows too. Because he's kissing you back, moving his lips against yours as his left hand moves towards his cheek and covers your right hand cupping it. Yes, he knows.
And you decide in your head that this is so perfect because you're kissing your Jiyong hyung and he's kissing you back and you both know your feelings are still the same, still so real, still so deep, still so in love with each other. And you smile into the kiss because this is so fucking not like you, so not like him, so not like the two of you.
Confessing? Kissing? No. Not like you two.
But.
------------
You smile as he tightens his hold on your hand. He's sitting beside you on the couch now, flipping through the channels again. His face illuminated by the television screen's glow that he looks so unnaturally gorgeous so you squeeze his hand back as you close your eyes again, leaning back to let your head thump against the couch's back. He's still looking for something interesting to watch as you hear the voices changing from the television set now and then but you're not interested at all.
Because... because now you know what's been bothering him. Jealousy. It's cute. But stupid. How can he think that you'll just fall out of love for him like that? How can he think you'll replace him with anyone when all you ever really want is to hold him?
And damn. If that agreement is written in paper, it would have been really ripped apart by now. Because it's getting really hard following by its unspoken rules, so hard trying to control feelings, to keep the longing, to hide the need. So hard.
He suddenly moves beside you and lays his head on your lap, snuggling into you. You crack an eye open, the television is showing that cooking show from earlier and he's taken his feet up to lay properly on the couch, making you his human pillow. Ah. You close your eyes again and smile, he's still holding your hand, holding it close to him. It warms your heart.
Yes, it's getting really really hard.
AN: Finally! Something! Sorry if it's crap this time. It's so hard to write using paper first and then not typing it in my own comp. Chapter 7 of SONGS. will be up when I finish writing it. Sorry tor all the readers!
AN2: If you're interested. This is why I haven't been updating much. We're moving houses! Two weeks ago, we moved to our aunt for a while while my dad works on the new house then last week we moved to another city to tend to my dad's store while he is still finishing the new house. It should be done by the end of April. I hope. Our computer is in the new house already, to be reassembled when there's already electricity there. I miss my computer. It has my BB stuff in it. Vids and songs and it feels so different sitting in another person's comp. I can't type anything... I am failure. Anyway, I hope I get my old comp back. And I'll continute to write stuff and post them even if it feels uneasy typing it somewhere else. Hope you guys understand!
AN3: I need my fix of really angsty as hell GRi fics!!!!