Thread
Title : Thread | Kyuhyun/Ryeowook | Angst, Friendship, Romance (?) | G
a/n : Kyuhyun - centric
Why am I still standing here? You ask yourself, and then your lips sneer a bit forming a small smile while clutching onto the basket in your hands. Why am I just standing here?
You lowered your head down to look at the porch steps you used to admire, not quite fitting in this small town you once lived in. Back to the days when everything was simple, when everything seems to go the way you wanted them to, back to the days when you were still young and your biggest problem was the little boy who suddenly appeared at the playground you labeled as yours.
You remember standing there at the same spot, only then you were just 3 feet shorter and holding a bag of herbal chips alongside with your mom to welcome your new neighbor. And then a beautiful woman, obviously younger than your mom welcomes you in. You remember staying by the entrance because you couldn’t get your shoes off, afraid to ruin the shoelace you tied for 10 minutes. But then a boy appears in front of you and pokes your head to capture your attention, or maybe to inform you that he was there. Your brows furrowed into a frown recognizing him as the boy who invaded your playground the day before. He smiles at you and you felt something banging loudly in your chest. You frown once more and told him, Don’t do that! He instead tilted his head sideways making his long hair bounce forming two loops above his head. You smirked and pointed at his top. You look like a rabbit. That was intended to tease but you found him smiling wider, little hands clasped loudly in front of his chest, then you thought you heard the little wind chime hanging by your window when he squealed, Really? I love rabbits!
Kyuhyun? You heard your mother holler from the hallway and then she smiled widely seeing the little boy in front of you. The little boy bowed at your mom and greeted her enthusiastically. You pouted seeing your mom pinch the boy’s chubby cheeks just like how he does to you. My name in Kim Ryeowook. The little boy said and when you looked up, you realized he was talking to you, he continued, Nice to meet you Kyuhyunnie! And then all of a sudden you are being pulled to the living room.
Ryeo…. Ry…. Hey! You hated it when you have to call him but he doesn’t look back until you call his name. You hated his name because it sounds like a tongue twister and you couldn’t get it right. Ryeonggu! You instead shouted and he peaked back at you with wide eyes asking, Are you talking to me? Your lips formed a wide smile showing almost all of your teeth. That’s your new nickname now, only I can call you that okay? He fully turned back to you, a wide smile mirroring yours slowly appearing on his lips. Then you should let me call you Hyunnie now.
You didn’t get it how Ryeowook ended up crying that one time during gym class at middle school when you were talking to your first crush and she started calling you Hyunnie. You didn’t get it when Seohyun told you that it’s your couple name and no one should call you Hyunnie except for her, you agreed right away. That afternoon, Ryeowook started calling you Kyuhyun and you decided you’re a little bit old for nicknames so you started calling him Ryeowook, with perfect pronunciation. But it was then that you felt like there’s something wrong, something different, something missing.
You used to tell everyone that Ryeowook is your best friend when they ask you, but now you’re so good at pretending not to see him when you pass by each other at the hallways during lunch. When did it start? Was it when your new group of friends started teasing him gay? Was it when your classmates labeled him as nerd? No, it was when you got yourself into a fistfight with a gang and he just had to throw himself into the warzone fighting back to back with you though he ended up with most of the bruises and cuts, and you just had to shout at him saying Mind your own business!
There was this time when you were having fun with your new group of friends at the center of the cafeteria and you just happened to spot Ryeowook at the far end table giggling with Lee Sungmin, your lab partner who submitted the supposed to be ‘group’ report without your name on it because you did nothing to help. You approached Ryeowook that afternoon and told him to never go near Lee Sungmin and he should listen to you because you are his best friend, and you hate Sungmin so he should do the same. The next day you felt contented when you spotted Ryeowook eating alone at the far end table in the cafeteria. He saw you staring at him and he smiled at you but you just turned your head away. You knew but you pretended not to see how he bit his lower lip and started to gather his half-eaten lunch to throw it away to the left-over.
There was that one time when you invited your friends over to your house one afternoon, and upon arriving to your house, your cheeks started to heat up with embarrassment when your friends saw your mom and Ryeowook in the kitchen baking cakes and cookies. That weekend you pulled Ryeowook to the arena and challenged him to a marathon and told him that if you win, he should never step a foot inside your house again. He hesitantly nodded. And then a moment later, all you hear is the sound of the ambulance’s siren and the panicking voice of Mrs. Kim. You stood there frozen asking yourself, Is it my fault?
One day you arrived in an empty house and found a note on the table from your mother saying she’ll be at the Kim’s. You peaked at the kitchen window and saw your mom, Mrs. Kim, and Ryeowook having fun at their kitchen. Mrs. Kim saw you and winked you over but you just let go of the curtain and it fell blocking their view of you, and your sight of them. You saw your childhood picture at the living room, the one where you are sitting on the sandbox and Ryeowook was leaning his chin on your head, smiling like an angel, his arms wrapped around your neck. You whispered while staring at the picture, You won the race, why aren’t you coming over anymore?
The next afternoon at dismissal, you saw Ryeowook with Kim Heechul, the one living across your house, but you abruptly tore your gaze away before he sees you staring. After playing video games with your friends, you arrived home a bit late and you were surprised to see Ryeowook going out of Kim Heechul’s front door. You saw Ryeowook turn back and jumped playfully at Heechul hugging him while at it, and the taller one ruffling Ryeowook’s hair.
That time Ryeowook saw you staring at him and you just stood there waiting for him to smile at you like he used to, but this time it was Ryeowook who turned his head away and headed to his house. In your subconscious mind you noted how puffy his eyes are and how thin he became. You noted how prominent his cheekbones are now that his chubby cheeks were out of sight. But you’re too preoccupied to think of all that. I miss you, you whisper into thin air.
There was this singing contest before high school graduation where you represented your class. You were too confident that you’d win when the judges sent a letter to your homeroom adviser informing everyone that you got in to the top five finalists. When you were five, Ryeowook used to cry when you sing a song to him, saying Hyunnie, your voice is really really beautiful. You loved it when Ryeowook calls you at night telling you he had a nightmare and he asks you to sing for him until he drifts off to sleep and you happily oblige. And now you’re standing on the stage in front of thousands of people and a blinding spotlight. You wanted to dedicate the song to Ryeowook because it was his favorite but you decided not to and instead offered it to your class. The last contestant was called and your pride rose higher than your hairline when you heard the same intro as the one you sang, thinking you’re definitely better than that, but you almost ran out of the back stage when you heard the familiar wind chime you used to have when you were a child. And there was Ryeowook singing his heart out for everyone. You never thought Ryeowook would join a contest. You never thought Ryeowook sings, so well in fact. You never thought Ryeowook would have the courage to stand on stage. And then a stuttering voice woke you up from your train of thoughts. I dedicate this song to my best friend. I think this is the only way for you to hear me. Hyunnie, Happy Birthday.
After the contest, you found yourself running after Ryeowook and you found him in Heechul’s arms. You almost crushed the second place trophy in your hands you’re not aware you’re still holding all the while. Heechul saw you and patted Ryeowook’s head, then Ryeowook slowly turned to you and your heart was crushed when you saw him crying. You just stood there staring at him and both of you were alone again.
C-congratulations Kyuhyun-ah. He said hiding the first place trophy behind him. And you felt like a stranger. And you realize that you’re just dreaming when you thought you were alone when Ryeowook started to walk away towards Heechul’s direction. R-Ryeo…. Ryeonggu! You suddenly let out and he halted, stared at you with wide eyes but the tears just continued flowing. A… Aren’t you coming with me? You asked, holding on to the unspoken promise both of you made when you were at the border of not really knowing and knowing all the secrets of the world. I can’t. He just said, and you found yourself wanting to tear the acceptance letter you received from Kyunghee University.
The night before you leave, you took courage to go over his house, and Mrs. Kim welcomed you with her warm smile, you almost tear up remembering how cruel you sometimes are to her. You asked her where Ryeowook is and she said he went out with Heechul. Maybe it was jealousy. Yes, he was your bestfriend after all. Then Mrs. Kim ruffles your hair and you noted how she stretched her arms just to reach the top of your head. You miss him, don’t you? She said, then her hands slid down to your cheeks and wiped a tear that was about to fall from your eyes. She hugged you and you started to cry. Go on, he’s in your hideout. She whispers, and now you’re running towards the playground at the back of the clubhouse. You saw them there, Ryeowook sitting on the swing, humming a tune too familiar to you and looking at the stars that decided to show themselves that night. Wookie, you heard Heechul speak, Let’s go home. It’s getting cold, it’s bad for your health. And then you looked at Ryeowook who just smiled at the taller one. One more minute, hyung. He whispered, and you noted how pale his lips are and how tired his eyes looked like.
Then tears trickled down your cheeks, and you found yourself walking up to him. You knelt in front of him and placed your trembling hands on his cheeks. Why? You asked. Why didn’t you tell me? You heard your voice crack, but the sound of your heart breaking is more blatant. Small, cold hands found their way to your cheeks, wiping the tears that you failed to keep. Hyunnie, sing for me. You heard him say. And for the first and last time, you’re the one who tuck him in his bed, combing his soft brown hair while singing a song both of you know by heart, and watching him fall asleep in your arms.
You watched as brown orbs blinked their sight awake, and you smile seeing livelier and more pinkish cheeks. Goodmorning. You said, and he just smiled at you. You spent a few more hours just lazily lying on his bed, talking about things that made both of you happy, memories that never did fade away, and days that will always stay.
You walked out of the Kim’s house with a heavy heart. Hyunnie! You heard a soft voice shouting from the window on the second floor and you smiled when you saw Ryeowook waving at you. Come back to me? He asked, and you refused to hold back your tears. Ryeonggu! You shouted back, Wait for me okay? And Ryeowook nodded while smiling at you.
You held on to that smile. Because Ryeowook never lies.
The white door creaked open and you saw the familiar face of Mrs. Kim. She smiled at you and hugged you tight. You walked up the familiar stairs and to the room you last visited three years ago. Two familiar figures welcomed you and a voice you’ve been longing to hear tickled your senses. Welcome back Hyunnie. But you realize you’re just dreaming when you saw him lying still on his bed.
Do you know what the worst break-up is? You heard Heechul ask. His eyes, red, and his cheeks tear-streaked. Breaking up with a friend. He continued, and you found yourself staring at the piece of paper in Ryeowook’s cold hands. In that paper, written are the words you’ve been longing to hear, but you never had the chance.
a/n : I'm feeling so down. And i'm sorry for the angst. Yes, i'm very sorry. I know i should be posting this as one of the request fics but I think it's too angsty for that ( and it's supposed to be a birthday fic too.... ) well... mianhe~ orz
a/n : Kyuhyun - centric
Why am I still standing here? You ask yourself, and then your lips sneer a bit forming a small smile while clutching onto the basket in your hands. Why am I just standing here?
You lowered your head down to look at the porch steps you used to admire, not quite fitting in this small town you once lived in. Back to the days when everything was simple, when everything seems to go the way you wanted them to, back to the days when you were still young and your biggest problem was the little boy who suddenly appeared at the playground you labeled as yours.
You remember standing there at the same spot, only then you were just 3 feet shorter and holding a bag of herbal chips alongside with your mom to welcome your new neighbor. And then a beautiful woman, obviously younger than your mom welcomes you in. You remember staying by the entrance because you couldn’t get your shoes off, afraid to ruin the shoelace you tied for 10 minutes. But then a boy appears in front of you and pokes your head to capture your attention, or maybe to inform you that he was there. Your brows furrowed into a frown recognizing him as the boy who invaded your playground the day before. He smiles at you and you felt something banging loudly in your chest. You frown once more and told him, Don’t do that! He instead tilted his head sideways making his long hair bounce forming two loops above his head. You smirked and pointed at his top. You look like a rabbit. That was intended to tease but you found him smiling wider, little hands clasped loudly in front of his chest, then you thought you heard the little wind chime hanging by your window when he squealed, Really? I love rabbits!
Kyuhyun? You heard your mother holler from the hallway and then she smiled widely seeing the little boy in front of you. The little boy bowed at your mom and greeted her enthusiastically. You pouted seeing your mom pinch the boy’s chubby cheeks just like how he does to you. My name in Kim Ryeowook. The little boy said and when you looked up, you realized he was talking to you, he continued, Nice to meet you Kyuhyunnie! And then all of a sudden you are being pulled to the living room.
Ryeo…. Ry…. Hey! You hated it when you have to call him but he doesn’t look back until you call his name. You hated his name because it sounds like a tongue twister and you couldn’t get it right. Ryeonggu! You instead shouted and he peaked back at you with wide eyes asking, Are you talking to me? Your lips formed a wide smile showing almost all of your teeth. That’s your new nickname now, only I can call you that okay? He fully turned back to you, a wide smile mirroring yours slowly appearing on his lips. Then you should let me call you Hyunnie now.
You didn’t get it how Ryeowook ended up crying that one time during gym class at middle school when you were talking to your first crush and she started calling you Hyunnie. You didn’t get it when Seohyun told you that it’s your couple name and no one should call you Hyunnie except for her, you agreed right away. That afternoon, Ryeowook started calling you Kyuhyun and you decided you’re a little bit old for nicknames so you started calling him Ryeowook, with perfect pronunciation. But it was then that you felt like there’s something wrong, something different, something missing.
You used to tell everyone that Ryeowook is your best friend when they ask you, but now you’re so good at pretending not to see him when you pass by each other at the hallways during lunch. When did it start? Was it when your new group of friends started teasing him gay? Was it when your classmates labeled him as nerd? No, it was when you got yourself into a fistfight with a gang and he just had to throw himself into the warzone fighting back to back with you though he ended up with most of the bruises and cuts, and you just had to shout at him saying Mind your own business!
There was this time when you were having fun with your new group of friends at the center of the cafeteria and you just happened to spot Ryeowook at the far end table giggling with Lee Sungmin, your lab partner who submitted the supposed to be ‘group’ report without your name on it because you did nothing to help. You approached Ryeowook that afternoon and told him to never go near Lee Sungmin and he should listen to you because you are his best friend, and you hate Sungmin so he should do the same. The next day you felt contented when you spotted Ryeowook eating alone at the far end table in the cafeteria. He saw you staring at him and he smiled at you but you just turned your head away. You knew but you pretended not to see how he bit his lower lip and started to gather his half-eaten lunch to throw it away to the left-over.
There was that one time when you invited your friends over to your house one afternoon, and upon arriving to your house, your cheeks started to heat up with embarrassment when your friends saw your mom and Ryeowook in the kitchen baking cakes and cookies. That weekend you pulled Ryeowook to the arena and challenged him to a marathon and told him that if you win, he should never step a foot inside your house again. He hesitantly nodded. And then a moment later, all you hear is the sound of the ambulance’s siren and the panicking voice of Mrs. Kim. You stood there frozen asking yourself, Is it my fault?
One day you arrived in an empty house and found a note on the table from your mother saying she’ll be at the Kim’s. You peaked at the kitchen window and saw your mom, Mrs. Kim, and Ryeowook having fun at their kitchen. Mrs. Kim saw you and winked you over but you just let go of the curtain and it fell blocking their view of you, and your sight of them. You saw your childhood picture at the living room, the one where you are sitting on the sandbox and Ryeowook was leaning his chin on your head, smiling like an angel, his arms wrapped around your neck. You whispered while staring at the picture, You won the race, why aren’t you coming over anymore?
The next afternoon at dismissal, you saw Ryeowook with Kim Heechul, the one living across your house, but you abruptly tore your gaze away before he sees you staring. After playing video games with your friends, you arrived home a bit late and you were surprised to see Ryeowook going out of Kim Heechul’s front door. You saw Ryeowook turn back and jumped playfully at Heechul hugging him while at it, and the taller one ruffling Ryeowook’s hair.
That time Ryeowook saw you staring at him and you just stood there waiting for him to smile at you like he used to, but this time it was Ryeowook who turned his head away and headed to his house. In your subconscious mind you noted how puffy his eyes are and how thin he became. You noted how prominent his cheekbones are now that his chubby cheeks were out of sight. But you’re too preoccupied to think of all that. I miss you, you whisper into thin air.
There was this singing contest before high school graduation where you represented your class. You were too confident that you’d win when the judges sent a letter to your homeroom adviser informing everyone that you got in to the top five finalists. When you were five, Ryeowook used to cry when you sing a song to him, saying Hyunnie, your voice is really really beautiful. You loved it when Ryeowook calls you at night telling you he had a nightmare and he asks you to sing for him until he drifts off to sleep and you happily oblige. And now you’re standing on the stage in front of thousands of people and a blinding spotlight. You wanted to dedicate the song to Ryeowook because it was his favorite but you decided not to and instead offered it to your class. The last contestant was called and your pride rose higher than your hairline when you heard the same intro as the one you sang, thinking you’re definitely better than that, but you almost ran out of the back stage when you heard the familiar wind chime you used to have when you were a child. And there was Ryeowook singing his heart out for everyone. You never thought Ryeowook would join a contest. You never thought Ryeowook sings, so well in fact. You never thought Ryeowook would have the courage to stand on stage. And then a stuttering voice woke you up from your train of thoughts. I dedicate this song to my best friend. I think this is the only way for you to hear me. Hyunnie, Happy Birthday.
After the contest, you found yourself running after Ryeowook and you found him in Heechul’s arms. You almost crushed the second place trophy in your hands you’re not aware you’re still holding all the while. Heechul saw you and patted Ryeowook’s head, then Ryeowook slowly turned to you and your heart was crushed when you saw him crying. You just stood there staring at him and both of you were alone again.
C-congratulations Kyuhyun-ah. He said hiding the first place trophy behind him. And you felt like a stranger. And you realize that you’re just dreaming when you thought you were alone when Ryeowook started to walk away towards Heechul’s direction. R-Ryeo…. Ryeonggu! You suddenly let out and he halted, stared at you with wide eyes but the tears just continued flowing. A… Aren’t you coming with me? You asked, holding on to the unspoken promise both of you made when you were at the border of not really knowing and knowing all the secrets of the world. I can’t. He just said, and you found yourself wanting to tear the acceptance letter you received from Kyunghee University.
The night before you leave, you took courage to go over his house, and Mrs. Kim welcomed you with her warm smile, you almost tear up remembering how cruel you sometimes are to her. You asked her where Ryeowook is and she said he went out with Heechul. Maybe it was jealousy. Yes, he was your bestfriend after all. Then Mrs. Kim ruffles your hair and you noted how she stretched her arms just to reach the top of your head. You miss him, don’t you? She said, then her hands slid down to your cheeks and wiped a tear that was about to fall from your eyes. She hugged you and you started to cry. Go on, he’s in your hideout. She whispers, and now you’re running towards the playground at the back of the clubhouse. You saw them there, Ryeowook sitting on the swing, humming a tune too familiar to you and looking at the stars that decided to show themselves that night. Wookie, you heard Heechul speak, Let’s go home. It’s getting cold, it’s bad for your health. And then you looked at Ryeowook who just smiled at the taller one. One more minute, hyung. He whispered, and you noted how pale his lips are and how tired his eyes looked like.
Then tears trickled down your cheeks, and you found yourself walking up to him. You knelt in front of him and placed your trembling hands on his cheeks. Why? You asked. Why didn’t you tell me? You heard your voice crack, but the sound of your heart breaking is more blatant. Small, cold hands found their way to your cheeks, wiping the tears that you failed to keep. Hyunnie, sing for me. You heard him say. And for the first and last time, you’re the one who tuck him in his bed, combing his soft brown hair while singing a song both of you know by heart, and watching him fall asleep in your arms.
You watched as brown orbs blinked their sight awake, and you smile seeing livelier and more pinkish cheeks. Goodmorning. You said, and he just smiled at you. You spent a few more hours just lazily lying on his bed, talking about things that made both of you happy, memories that never did fade away, and days that will always stay.
You walked out of the Kim’s house with a heavy heart. Hyunnie! You heard a soft voice shouting from the window on the second floor and you smiled when you saw Ryeowook waving at you. Come back to me? He asked, and you refused to hold back your tears. Ryeonggu! You shouted back, Wait for me okay? And Ryeowook nodded while smiling at you.
You held on to that smile. Because Ryeowook never lies.
The white door creaked open and you saw the familiar face of Mrs. Kim. She smiled at you and hugged you tight. You walked up the familiar stairs and to the room you last visited three years ago. Two familiar figures welcomed you and a voice you’ve been longing to hear tickled your senses. Welcome back Hyunnie. But you realize you’re just dreaming when you saw him lying still on his bed.
Do you know what the worst break-up is? You heard Heechul ask. His eyes, red, and his cheeks tear-streaked. Breaking up with a friend. He continued, and you found yourself staring at the piece of paper in Ryeowook’s cold hands. In that paper, written are the words you’ve been longing to hear, but you never had the chance.
a/n : I'm feeling so down. And i'm sorry for the angst. Yes, i'm very sorry. I know i should be posting this as one of the request fics but I think it's too angsty for that ( and it's supposed to be a birthday fic too.... ) well... mianhe~ orz