Under Different Circumstances 102/?
Title: Under Different Circumstances
Chapter 102/?: Overwhelmed
Characters: Jean-Pierre, Vincent
Genre: Romance, drama-ish
Rating for this chapter: K+
Pairings: Jean-PierrexVincent
Summary: A series of short stories showing the evolution between Vincent and Jean-Pierre.
This chapter summary: Vincent can't take it anymore.
Under Different Circumstances
Overwhelmed
Disclaimer: Based on a discussion.
Under Different Circumstances
Overwhelmed
Vincent was sitting at his desk, in his home office. He stared at the two envelopes in front of him. One had tickets to a Maple Leafs game and the other had tickets, for a New Years Eve party, at a club, in Toronto. Both were gifts from Jean-Pierre. He sighed as he pushed them away and put his head on his desk. It wasn’t that he didn’t appreciate the thought, or gesture, but lately, he was finding Jean-Pierre to be too… overwhelming.
He enjoyed the small attentions that his husband gave him like any other man, but there was a limit. Jean-Pierre was getting on his nerves, with all the romantic stuff. The problem was he had no idea how he was supposed to tell his lover how he felt, without destroying the older man.
“Vincent…? Est-c’que ça va?”/ “Vincent…? Are you okay?” He heard Jean-Pierre ask, at his door. He really didn’t feel like talking to him, but he had been cooped up in here for over five hours and the fact that his husband hadn’t bothered him in all that time said a lot.
“I guess… Jean, faut qu’on s’parle. Rentre.”/ “… Jean, we need to talk. Come in.” He turned around on his chair and watched his partner walk in. He seemed a little worried and apprehensive and Vincent couldn’t really blame him. He would have been worried, if Jean-Pierre was acting the way he was.
“Assieds toi.”/ “Sit down.” He pointed to his couch and Jean-Pierre sat down.
“Vincent?” Jean-Pierre asked after a moment of silence lapsed.
“This has to stop… or at least tone down a little.” He said with a sigh. Jean-Pierre looked at him quizzically and it wasn’t because Vincent was talking to him in English.
“Chuis pas sûr que j’sais de quoi tu parles.”/ “I’m not sure I know what you’re talking about.”
“Ton… ton romantisme! Toi! I can’t keep up anymore. I’m tired of being stuck in a competition with you, to see who outdoes who, for the next gift.”/ “Your… your romanticism! You!...” The older man still looked just as confused and even though Vincent was frustrated, he knew that he wasn’t making much sense and couldn’t really blame Jean-Pierre. He took a moment to try and compose his thoughts.
“Les petites attentions pour moi, les cadeaux presque à chaque semaine, les roses, toujours des fucking roses, pour aucune raison… une fois de temps en temps c’est bien, mais pas toujours. You’ve killed the magic, là. Trop c’est comme pas assez. D’you understand what I’m saying?”/ “The small attentions for me, the gifts almost every week, the roses, always fucking roses, for no reason… every now and then is okay, but not always. … Too much is like too little…”
“Peut-être, chuis pas trop sûr…”/ “Maybe, I’m not really sure...”
“Imagine your doting and whatnot is like a rich, decadent, chocolate cake. If you take a piece every now and then; it’s good. If you take a bigger piece once or twice and overindulge; it’s okay. But if you eat all the cake in one sitting; you don’t appreciate it, pis ça te tappe su l’coeur. Tu comprends? C’est comme ça que j’me sens. I’m overwhelmed!”/ “… and it makes you feel sick. D’you understand? That’s how I feel…” He took a moment to observe Jean-Pierre and catch his breath.
“Chavais pas qu’t’aimais pas ça…”/ “I didn’t know you didn’t like that…” He finally said.
“C’est pas que j’aime pas, mais put yourself in my shoes! You built me a house, for my birthday, you paid for a trip, to Fiji, for our anniversary, you bring me flowers so often and you take me out all the time. Imagine how I feel! And then you always say that it’s nothing and apologise. J’veux pas m’casser la tête pour essayer de topper ça chaque fois!”/ “It’s not that I don’t like it, but… I don’t want to get an aneurism trying to top that every time!”
“T’as pas à “topper ça”… J’faisais pas ça pour que tu t’sentes mal…”/ “You don’t have to “top that”… I wasn’t doing that so that you’d feel bad…” Vincent tried to read his face, but Jean-Pierre was unreadable.
“Well, that’s how I feel! I feel like I do fuck all for you.”
“C’pas vrai ça, Vincent, t’en fait beaucoup pour moi.”/ “That’s not true, Vincent, you do a lot for me.”
“Oh yeah? Name me three things, Jean, three things.”
“Tu m’écoutes toujours, tu m’donnes une autre chance quand j’gaffe, pis t’es toujours patient avec moi.”/ “You always listen to me, you give me another chance when I mess up, and you’re always patient with me.” Jean-Pierre replied honestly. Vincent laughed bitterly.
“That’s nothing. I’m your husband. I’m supposed to do those things. You do them for me too.” He passed a hand through his hair and sighed.
“God, I wish you would just let me dote on you, every now and then. You know, every time we go out you always pay. I would like to pay every now and then. I would like to take you out, once in a while. Is that so much to ask?”
“Non. T’as juste à prendre l’initiative, si tu veux m’sortir, là. C’pas compliqué, là.”/ “No. All you have to do is take the initiative, if you want to take me out. It’s not complicated.”
“I’m not like you! As much as I have my moments, I can’t just walk home, one night, and decide that we’re going to have a romantic evening! I need ages of planning. Christ, I couldn’t even hand you a fucking bouquet of flowers, on Valentine’s, and look at you in the eyes. I felt like some fucking lame school girl. We’re supposed to be equals in this. I can’t - I can’t even cook you supper, because I can’t fucking cook.” Jean-Pierre was silent and Vincent hit his desk in frustration.
“You’re choking me. You’re making me drown. You don’t have anything to prove anymore. I know you love me. God, you even made the house in Ontario. D’you have any idea how guilty I feel? D’you know how many nights I just lie in bed, awake, filled with remorse?”
“J’l’ai fait pour ton bien, Vincent… j’voulais t’faire plaisir.”/ “I did it for your own good, Vincent… I wanted to make you happy.” Vincent let out a shrill, hysterical laugh.
“Jean, Jean, listen to yourself! I took you away from your friends and surroundings. I feel like the biggest jackass ever put on this planet! Christ, be selfish every now and then. Think of yourself, once in a while.”
“… Ch’savais pas qu’t’étais si malheureux, à cause de tout ça.”/ “… I didn’t know you were so unhappy, because of all this.”
“And the worst is that I can’t even be upset at you. Because as much as it’s overbearing, as much as I find it to be too much, I know that you’re just doing this because you love me. I wish you would do something to upset me. I almost want a fight with you, something to give me a reason to feel so angry. What kind of person feels frustrated, because his husband showers him with gifts?!” Jean-Pierre remained silent.
“I’m tired, Jean. I’m so tired of everything. I’m tired of the competition. I’m tired of trying to outdo you. I want to be able to appreciate your little presents again. I just… I just need some time alone. I don’t want to make this any worse than it already is.”
“La seule raison qu’j’ai fait tout ça c’est parce que je t’aime. Je ne savais pas qu’il existait une limite à la manière que je pouvais agir.”/ “The only reason I did all of this is because I love you. I didn’t know there existed a limit to the way I could act.” Jean-Pierre replied coolly.
“Please, don’t make me feel any worse than I already do. Just… please, I want to be left alone.” Jean-Pierre respected his wish and let him be. He didn’t bother him for the week that followed and Vincent appreciated the breathing space, as much as he also longed for the proximity of Jean-Pierre’s warm body.
After a week passed, he felt it was high time for him to go back to Jean-Pierre. When he got home from work that night, he found his husband sitting, on their living room couch, petting Monsieur. The older man seemed pensive and lost in thought. Vincent removed his shoes and coat, before walking up to him and sitting next to him.
Jean-Pierre spared him a glance and then returned to staring ahead of him. Vincent sighed and took his hand in his. He twined their fingers together and was relieved when he felt a squeeze to his hand.
“I’m sorry.” Vincent whispered.
“Moi aussi je m’excuse. Pour la façon que j’ai réagis et aussi, j’avais pas réalisé à quel point j’étais “over de top”. J’vais faire de mon mieux pour arranger ça.”/ “I’m sorry too. For the way I acted and also, I hadn’t realised at what point I could be “over the top”. I’ll try my best to fix that.” Jean-Pierre told him. Vincent turned his head to look at him and Jean-Pierre turned his head at the same time. Their gazes met and Vincent held it for as long as necessary, for him to feel that connection with Jean-Pierre. When he finally felt that they were on the same page, once more, he gave him a small smile.
“It’s okay, I forgive you. I know it’s in your nature.” He scooted closer and leaned his head on Jean-Pierre’s chest.
“Laisse-moi savoir si ça l’arrive encore. J’veux pas t’étouffer avec mon affection et tout.”/ “Let me know if it happens again. I don’t want to choke you with my affection and all.”
“Okay, I promise.” He hugged his lover close and Jean-Pierre returned the embrace.
OWARI 102
I do accept anonymous reviews.
Started writing: December 24th 2011, 2:09pm
Finished writing: December 24th 2011, 3:58pm
Started typing: December 26th 2011, 3:00pm
Finished typing: December 26th 2011, 3:56pm
Chapter 102/?: Overwhelmed
Characters: Jean-Pierre, Vincent
Genre: Romance, drama-ish
Rating for this chapter: K+
Pairings: Jean-PierrexVincent
Summary: A series of short stories showing the evolution between Vincent and Jean-Pierre.
This chapter summary: Vincent can't take it anymore.
Under Different Circumstances
Overwhelmed
Disclaimer: Based on a discussion.
Under Different Circumstances
Overwhelmed
Vincent was sitting at his desk, in his home office. He stared at the two envelopes in front of him. One had tickets to a Maple Leafs game and the other had tickets, for a New Years Eve party, at a club, in Toronto. Both were gifts from Jean-Pierre. He sighed as he pushed them away and put his head on his desk. It wasn’t that he didn’t appreciate the thought, or gesture, but lately, he was finding Jean-Pierre to be too… overwhelming.
He enjoyed the small attentions that his husband gave him like any other man, but there was a limit. Jean-Pierre was getting on his nerves, with all the romantic stuff. The problem was he had no idea how he was supposed to tell his lover how he felt, without destroying the older man.
“Vincent…? Est-c’que ça va?”/ “Vincent…? Are you okay?” He heard Jean-Pierre ask, at his door. He really didn’t feel like talking to him, but he had been cooped up in here for over five hours and the fact that his husband hadn’t bothered him in all that time said a lot.
“I guess… Jean, faut qu’on s’parle. Rentre.”/ “… Jean, we need to talk. Come in.” He turned around on his chair and watched his partner walk in. He seemed a little worried and apprehensive and Vincent couldn’t really blame him. He would have been worried, if Jean-Pierre was acting the way he was.
“Assieds toi.”/ “Sit down.” He pointed to his couch and Jean-Pierre sat down.
“Vincent?” Jean-Pierre asked after a moment of silence lapsed.
“This has to stop… or at least tone down a little.” He said with a sigh. Jean-Pierre looked at him quizzically and it wasn’t because Vincent was talking to him in English.
“Chuis pas sûr que j’sais de quoi tu parles.”/ “I’m not sure I know what you’re talking about.”
“Ton… ton romantisme! Toi! I can’t keep up anymore. I’m tired of being stuck in a competition with you, to see who outdoes who, for the next gift.”/ “Your… your romanticism! You!...” The older man still looked just as confused and even though Vincent was frustrated, he knew that he wasn’t making much sense and couldn’t really blame Jean-Pierre. He took a moment to try and compose his thoughts.
“Les petites attentions pour moi, les cadeaux presque à chaque semaine, les roses, toujours des fucking roses, pour aucune raison… une fois de temps en temps c’est bien, mais pas toujours. You’ve killed the magic, là. Trop c’est comme pas assez. D’you understand what I’m saying?”/ “The small attentions for me, the gifts almost every week, the roses, always fucking roses, for no reason… every now and then is okay, but not always. … Too much is like too little…”
“Peut-être, chuis pas trop sûr…”/ “Maybe, I’m not really sure...”
“Imagine your doting and whatnot is like a rich, decadent, chocolate cake. If you take a piece every now and then; it’s good. If you take a bigger piece once or twice and overindulge; it’s okay. But if you eat all the cake in one sitting; you don’t appreciate it, pis ça te tappe su l’coeur. Tu comprends? C’est comme ça que j’me sens. I’m overwhelmed!”/ “… and it makes you feel sick. D’you understand? That’s how I feel…” He took a moment to observe Jean-Pierre and catch his breath.
“Chavais pas qu’t’aimais pas ça…”/ “I didn’t know you didn’t like that…” He finally said.
“C’est pas que j’aime pas, mais put yourself in my shoes! You built me a house, for my birthday, you paid for a trip, to Fiji, for our anniversary, you bring me flowers so often and you take me out all the time. Imagine how I feel! And then you always say that it’s nothing and apologise. J’veux pas m’casser la tête pour essayer de topper ça chaque fois!”/ “It’s not that I don’t like it, but… I don’t want to get an aneurism trying to top that every time!”
“T’as pas à “topper ça”… J’faisais pas ça pour que tu t’sentes mal…”/ “You don’t have to “top that”… I wasn’t doing that so that you’d feel bad…” Vincent tried to read his face, but Jean-Pierre was unreadable.
“Well, that’s how I feel! I feel like I do fuck all for you.”
“C’pas vrai ça, Vincent, t’en fait beaucoup pour moi.”/ “That’s not true, Vincent, you do a lot for me.”
“Oh yeah? Name me three things, Jean, three things.”
“Tu m’écoutes toujours, tu m’donnes une autre chance quand j’gaffe, pis t’es toujours patient avec moi.”/ “You always listen to me, you give me another chance when I mess up, and you’re always patient with me.” Jean-Pierre replied honestly. Vincent laughed bitterly.
“That’s nothing. I’m your husband. I’m supposed to do those things. You do them for me too.” He passed a hand through his hair and sighed.
“God, I wish you would just let me dote on you, every now and then. You know, every time we go out you always pay. I would like to pay every now and then. I would like to take you out, once in a while. Is that so much to ask?”
“Non. T’as juste à prendre l’initiative, si tu veux m’sortir, là. C’pas compliqué, là.”/ “No. All you have to do is take the initiative, if you want to take me out. It’s not complicated.”
“I’m not like you! As much as I have my moments, I can’t just walk home, one night, and decide that we’re going to have a romantic evening! I need ages of planning. Christ, I couldn’t even hand you a fucking bouquet of flowers, on Valentine’s, and look at you in the eyes. I felt like some fucking lame school girl. We’re supposed to be equals in this. I can’t - I can’t even cook you supper, because I can’t fucking cook.” Jean-Pierre was silent and Vincent hit his desk in frustration.
“You’re choking me. You’re making me drown. You don’t have anything to prove anymore. I know you love me. God, you even made the house in Ontario. D’you have any idea how guilty I feel? D’you know how many nights I just lie in bed, awake, filled with remorse?”
“J’l’ai fait pour ton bien, Vincent… j’voulais t’faire plaisir.”/ “I did it for your own good, Vincent… I wanted to make you happy.” Vincent let out a shrill, hysterical laugh.
“Jean, Jean, listen to yourself! I took you away from your friends and surroundings. I feel like the biggest jackass ever put on this planet! Christ, be selfish every now and then. Think of yourself, once in a while.”
“… Ch’savais pas qu’t’étais si malheureux, à cause de tout ça.”/ “… I didn’t know you were so unhappy, because of all this.”
“And the worst is that I can’t even be upset at you. Because as much as it’s overbearing, as much as I find it to be too much, I know that you’re just doing this because you love me. I wish you would do something to upset me. I almost want a fight with you, something to give me a reason to feel so angry. What kind of person feels frustrated, because his husband showers him with gifts?!” Jean-Pierre remained silent.
“I’m tired, Jean. I’m so tired of everything. I’m tired of the competition. I’m tired of trying to outdo you. I want to be able to appreciate your little presents again. I just… I just need some time alone. I don’t want to make this any worse than it already is.”
“La seule raison qu’j’ai fait tout ça c’est parce que je t’aime. Je ne savais pas qu’il existait une limite à la manière que je pouvais agir.”/ “The only reason I did all of this is because I love you. I didn’t know there existed a limit to the way I could act.” Jean-Pierre replied coolly.
“Please, don’t make me feel any worse than I already do. Just… please, I want to be left alone.” Jean-Pierre respected his wish and let him be. He didn’t bother him for the week that followed and Vincent appreciated the breathing space, as much as he also longed for the proximity of Jean-Pierre’s warm body.
After a week passed, he felt it was high time for him to go back to Jean-Pierre. When he got home from work that night, he found his husband sitting, on their living room couch, petting Monsieur. The older man seemed pensive and lost in thought. Vincent removed his shoes and coat, before walking up to him and sitting next to him.
Jean-Pierre spared him a glance and then returned to staring ahead of him. Vincent sighed and took his hand in his. He twined their fingers together and was relieved when he felt a squeeze to his hand.
“I’m sorry.” Vincent whispered.
“Moi aussi je m’excuse. Pour la façon que j’ai réagis et aussi, j’avais pas réalisé à quel point j’étais “over de top”. J’vais faire de mon mieux pour arranger ça.”/ “I’m sorry too. For the way I acted and also, I hadn’t realised at what point I could be “over the top”. I’ll try my best to fix that.” Jean-Pierre told him. Vincent turned his head to look at him and Jean-Pierre turned his head at the same time. Their gazes met and Vincent held it for as long as necessary, for him to feel that connection with Jean-Pierre. When he finally felt that they were on the same page, once more, he gave him a small smile.
“It’s okay, I forgive you. I know it’s in your nature.” He scooted closer and leaned his head on Jean-Pierre’s chest.
“Laisse-moi savoir si ça l’arrive encore. J’veux pas t’étouffer avec mon affection et tout.”/ “Let me know if it happens again. I don’t want to choke you with my affection and all.”
“Okay, I promise.” He hugged his lover close and Jean-Pierre returned the embrace.
OWARI 102
I do accept anonymous reviews.
Started writing: December 24th 2011, 2:09pm
Finished writing: December 24th 2011, 3:58pm
Started typing: December 26th 2011, 3:00pm
Finished typing: December 26th 2011, 3:56pm