Just recently returned to LJ so I wasn't prepared for your news. I'm so sorry that you are going through this. It's never easy. On the other hand, I think it is (easier) different when you are older and more sure of yourself. I also know about holding it in all day and then releasing it in the car. My car has seen a lot. Fortunately for me, not recently as I've been very happy since wackdaddy and I have been together.
I just came back too and am determined to write once a week or so. Its nice to see the few writers who are still here.
I love the safety of car crying, especially on the way home as its getting dark. Isn't it satisfying? I've started looking around furtively to see if I can spot others. I haven't. I love thinking about all of us, driving and weeping, shedding tears, like taking a shower, cleansing away the work foolishness and stored up feelings with a good scrub before entering our lives at home. It's funny and cheers me up if I picture it like a little film. Weeping drivers, all listening to different songs, tear triggers, once bastions of the workplace, just getting home.
I LOVE that you and Wackdaddy journal here. You do seem happy and that's awesome.
I'd like to think I'm cheering from the sidelines, I just have really cheap nosebleed seats way up in the rafters, far away but supportive. I have one of those foam hands with a CJ on it, you're number one.
Hang in there. Life has ups and downs and we can't reach the up if we don't navigate the down. I know how you feel. It's possible to feel alone even when you're not, and that's often worse.
Make a mental list of living alone pros and cons. I bet there's a shit ton of pros. I sometimes wish I could live alone again, to have peace and not worry about other's needs, but that will never happen. So I make a list of living-with-others pros and cons to remind myself that all is not bad, except when it is, for a day, or a week. We get through it.
awwwww, THANK YOU monkey man, that was an amazing virtual hug and your words made me smile. You are a great friend.
That's the thing. I don't mind most of it, just the little intimacies. I'm climbing back out. My place, my small place has 3 animals in it. I'm certainly not alone here.
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I love the safety of car crying, especially on the way home as its getting dark. Isn't it satisfying? I've started looking around furtively to see if I can spot others. I haven't. I love thinking about all of us, driving and weeping, shedding tears, like taking a shower, cleansing away the work foolishness and stored up feelings with a good scrub before entering our lives at home. It's funny and cheers me up if I picture it like a little film. Weeping drivers, all listening to different songs, tear triggers, once bastions of the workplace, just getting home.
I LOVE that you and Wackdaddy journal here. You do seem happy and that's awesome.
I appreciate your kind words.
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Hang in there. Life has ups and downs and we can't reach the up if we don't navigate the down. I know how you feel. It's possible to feel alone even when you're not, and that's often worse.
Make a mental list of living alone pros and cons. I bet there's a shit ton of pros. I sometimes wish I could live alone again, to have peace and not worry about other's needs, but that will never happen. So I make a list of living-with-others pros and cons to remind myself that all is not bad, except when it is, for a day, or a week. We get through it.
Keep writing. I'll read and wave my foam finger.
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That's the thing. I don't mind most of it, just the little intimacies. I'm climbing back out. My place, my small place has 3 animals in it. I'm certainly not alone here.
I will make my list!
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