nudist!Zoro
Title: nudist!Zoro
Rating: PG for naked Marimo and swearing
Media: fic
Characters: Zoro, Sanji, Nami
Word Count: 298
Prompt: head!canon
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“What the hell are you doing?!” Sanji shouted.
“Getting some sun,” Zoro drawled, lounging happily on the deck.
“You’re… naked!” Sanji squeaked waving his arms in a highly unsuccessful attempt to ‘unsee’.
“And you’re super observant. Got a problem?” Zoro raised one eyebrow enquiringly.
“Yes! That!!!” Sanji waved enthusiastically at the swordsman’s lower regions.
“Feeling inadequate, shit-cook?”
“No!” Sanji leapt to the defence of his manhood. He assumed a fighting stance and then realised that to fight Zoro, he would have to touch him. And he was all… naked.
Change of plan!
“It’s not that baka! Think of the poor innocent ladies! They would be forever scarred if they discovered you… just…”
“Naked?” Zoro helped.
“You-can’t-lie-around-on-the-ship-naked-it’s-just-not-decent,” Sanji stammered, turning red.
“Ladies! Hah. Nami’s seen more..”
“Right! I don’t care if you’re naked you bastard!!!” Sanji leapt on the offending Marimo, raining down kicks in a display of pure White Knight rage.
Zoro fought back with glee. In no time, they were beating the crap out of each other.
“Ummm… Sanji?”
Sanji froze.
Oh dear.
Nami tapped the cook’s shoulder. He was on the floor under Zoro, where they had landed while wrestling.
“What are you doing?”
“Ahhh… nothing, sweet petal. Zoro was just being his usual indiscreet self.”
“Yeah, I was going to mention that. Why is Zoro… naked? What are you two doing?”
“Me? I..?! Nami! You couldn’t possibly think..!” Sanji exploded, scrambling to his feet and trying to forget some of the *cough* highly revealing *cough* positions Zoro had been in.
“Never mind,” the navigator sung out sweetly, “I have a feeling that I don’t want to know!” then she waltzed off, up the deck, whistling a tune.
“Zoro?”
“Yes, shit cook?”
“I hate you.”
“I know.” Zoro grinned.
Ah, being naked always felt so free.
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