SamCham Fic: Enjoy the Show?

[oishii_fic]

Title: Enjoy the Show?
Author: Salome-sensei
Fandom: Samurai Champloo
Pairing: Fuu/Jin
Rating: MA
Summary: Fuu rises early to find that Jin is already awake.
Prompt: citrus_taste #16, Lime Table, "Can't Stop Watching You"
Author's Note: Trying third person present tense here, narrator a bit intrusive. Not sure if it works well or not.

Comments

[sunsingergirl]

I think you did a good job; present tense is hard to hold onto. Past tense always seems to try and sneak up on me every time i try it. XD

If I were Fuu, I'd so smack Mugen for that comment. But that's just because she DID, in fact, enjoy the show.

[salomesensei]

Thank you ~ I enjoy present-tense for certain effects, but this one was more "intrusive" in narrative style, kinda heavy-handed. But I think that's how SamCham is too sometimes.

And as for Mugen, he wouldn't know what she was watching if he wasn't watching too...or has watched many mornings before. Naughty vagrant.

[furousha]

*snorts* if Fuu wants a show, all she's gotta do 's ask. Mine's bigger than four eyes' anyway. *reaches hands in pants and scratches*

i am the Mugeeennnnnn. XD

love this Sensei. Mugen, you are my dream. :D

[salomesensei]

Now, now. She's just admiring Jin's form. Nobody scratches his ass like Mugen, and don't think Fuu misses that. This was just a Fuu/Jin moment.

I'll do more Mugen/Fuu soon. <33

[furousha]

damn right nobody scratches their ass like me! *grins*

lolll.

<333

[jennabean_dp]

Oh my...so. much. hotness...

*faints*

I has been overloaded.

[salomesensei]

Yay, I overloaded the Jenna! ^_^

[casper_san]

LOL Fuu ain't so innocent. I really liked the present tense here. It was nice and it flowed well with it. ^.^

[salomesensei]

Thank you ~ am so glad it worked. My Fuu varies so much, from flirty shy thing to hot drunk tramp. I love SamCham! Thanks for reading ^_^

[kattrip033]

I like this Fuu.

The whole thing had a good sense of flow.

[salomesensei]

^_^ Jin's so ... watchable.

[kattrip033]

He really is.