The Parvenu Legacy: 8.3
Previously: Yara and Lyle got married and had two children Xander and Whistler. A family band, Oh my Lyle!, was started. Cadence and Jack got old. Jeeves the butler was let free to roam and destroy the neighborhood.
Oh my Lyle! finally landed their first gig in the city! Sure, playing for hours on end at the house is good, but playing at a sleazy bar for two disinterested people who happen to be related to you is even better!
Parvenu cousin and/or spouse: "Clearly I need more drinks for this."
Lyle has started to get over his stage fright. Then again.. by this time everyone was at the bar, so it was just like playing in the living room back home.
After two hours, which really turned into about 8 because it takes a freakishly long time to get from the house to downtown, everyone starves in unison. I think it gives a new meaning to starving artist. Dun dun dun~~
Cadence: "We're done now, where is that payment?"
Bartender: "I'm not sure how much I can pay you... to be honest I didn't think you'd actually show up."
Cadence: "Let me rephrase. I am a master thief and I will be taking most of the contents of this bar as payment later if you don't pay me. So where is that payment?"
Bartender: "Here.. you can have this much." (Oh all my tips for the evening. Now I can never propose to my girlfriend..)
Back home, Robi begins to make a delicious salad for the family. Lyle disapproves.
Lyle: "For the love of Lyle man, anything but salad again! Have you heard of meat? You know? Yummy and delicious meat?"
Xander helped himself to a hot dog as Lyle helped himself off the floor.
Lyle: "I'm so proud of you my son. Chant with me? Meat! Meat! Oh come on now... Meat!"
Xander: "I am going to go eat my dinner ... alone. Don't follow me."
Lyle: "Well you aren't any fun."
So Lyle went to have some fun. I really have a hard time keeping him and Yara off of each other. They love their woohoo. Coincidentally, this coincided with Jack making Yara's computer unbreakable.
Jack: "This computer may be unbreakable, but I think my mind just broke in its place."
Legs and an unsuspecting but cute face can only mean one thing...
Yara: "Come to Mama!"
And so, Yara had her first want to steal candy from her own child. Poor Whistler..
Yara: "Sorry baby. I'm not raising a wuss."
The next night both Lyle and Jack got invited to dancing opportunities. Apparently Lyle got invited to dance at a joint similar to a strip-club.
Lyle: "Uh.. this is a little tiny bit awkward.."
But as the night wore on he even started to enjoy himself.
Lyle: "I like to call this the come hither look. What do you all on the dance floor think?"
Click to viewHere is a little video of Lyle. He amused me. So funny story about it not having sound, I updated my video card driver and for some reason it reset my game to defaults when I loaded it back up. I forgot to turn the sound in video captures back on. :3
I mentioned that Jack was also invited to a dancing opportunity.. Rather than a strip-club type venue, he got a senior citizens dance.
Man: "Boy, my knees sure ain't what they used to be! I'm on the lookout for a good time tonight. Never been married myself, how about you?"
Jack: "I've had my fair share of women, but I love my wife. Also for the record, we're the only people here right now, so unless you were planning on coming home with me ...."
Man: "Well if you don't mind... I don't mind..."
Jack: "Oh HELL no. Jack don't swing that way. I'm out of this place!"
Yara was teaching Whistler all about important cultural things like art and music.
Yara: "So which painting to you want Grandma to steal for you next?"
Whistler: "Whistler's Mother!"
Yara: "Aw how sweet! You make mama sorry for stealing your candy!"
Yara: "Lyle sweetie? Where is that lovely portrait of you that I had above our marital bed?"
Lyle: (Ohshittt!) "Uh.. well.. you see.. Actually! I gave it to Jeeves when we left. Jeeves was a big fan and uh he said that he would just cry for days if he couldn't remember me by something, so I gave it to him."
Yara: "Oh so you mean to tell me Jeeves was gay? For you?"
Lyle: "... yes?"
Yara: "Which is why he hit on me and not you?"
Lyle: "Listen Yara, love does different things in different people. I can't explain, you know?"
That night Illinois decided to have a little fun around the house.
Jack: *yawn* "9:00, time for bed!"
Illinois: "My my Jack! Showing your age there, aren't you?"
But Jack wasn't going to have any of that.
Jack: "No, I was just waking up thank you very much."
So having gotten Jack riled up, Illi heads downstairs to watch some home shopping. And poor Lyle just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.
Lyle: "My weak heart can't take this anymore."
Lyle stayed there until Illi left. Poor Illi...
Before school, Xander asked for help on his reading homework.
Xander: "Dad I don't get this. Why are words that are spelled the same pronounced different? How do you know which you are reading? Read or read? Tear or tear? Wind or wind?"
Lyle: "Xander, that is a very very good question! One that you should ask your teacher. English just doesn't make a lot of sense some of the time. Well, when you're Lyle you get by on your stunning good looks so you don't have to do learnings..."
Xander: "Well that was a dumb idea. Thanks anyways Dad. Next time I'm asking Mom."
Lyle: "Oh dear what have I done?!"
When Lyle plays and Yara walks by she always thinks of him and then gets the Yara face.
Yara: "If I didn't have a prior celebrity engagement I'd have you in bed in a second Lyle."
This city apparently has an outrageous need for celebrities to dance for hours on end to generate bar publicity.
Yara: "Drinks on the house!"
Shiki was there in his apparently old-age clubbing clothes. Very stylish.
Yara: "Shiki Kalos.. right?"
Shiki: "Well it depends. From the hair I gather you are related to Cadence.."
Yara: "Yeah I am, but don't worry. I just wanted to offer you a drink as an apology for putting up with my Mother and her antics. I appreciate what all you've done for the evil community even if she doesn't."
Shiki: "..this is poisoned, isn't it?"
Yara: "Okay well maybe a little. Not! Drink up old man and have a good time!"
Yara's good time was quickly brought to an end.
Yara: "Hello old friend, we meet again!"
It was soon time for Lyle's birthday!
Lyle: "I wish that I have a hot sexy wife for all time!"
To make things more celebratory, Yara finally popped!
Yara: "More babies?!"
Yara met up with her friend Lula Belle down by the water. Upon arrival, Yara began to cackle incessantly. It was quite unnerving.
Yara: "AHAHHAAHAHAHAHA!"
Lula: "Uh, Yara babe? What's goin' on?"
Yara: "BWAHAHAHAAHA!"
Lula: "Well girlfran, I'm goin' to da little girls room. You jus have fun doin' what you doin'"
Yara: "HOHOHOHOHO! There is a crying child in the park who looks devilishly close to my own! Watching the misfortune of others is wonderful!"
Thirty minutes later, Yara catches up with Lula in the bathroom.
Yara: "I just wanted to let you know that I'm pregnant again. I wanted to tell you before the paparazzi found out."
Lula: "Wow girl, that's chill an' all, but whazzat gonna do to yer musics, ya kno? Can't be playin' bass wit dat big ol' baby belly can ya?"
Yara: "It'll be fine. Pregnancy only lasts a few day then I'm back to top shape!"
Lula: "Haha, girl really? I'm jus a pop icon so I don't kno bout this stuff!"
Tom: "Shhh shh, stop that crying. It's your turn to be with Daddy so you be good while Daddy does his thing, a'right?"
Yara: "Hello there celebrity Tom! Is that your child that you abandoned earlier and was screaming?"
Tom: "Listen bitch, I don't abandon my kid. Don't you be starting shit about me."
Yara: "Well Tom, I think you are going to regret that."
Yara: "Hey Tom! Look at what I'm doing! I'm taking a picture of you abandoning your child! I bet the courts are going to LOVE this!"
Tom: "Aw hell no. Now dey gonna get me for more child support!"
Legs + Hopeful looking toddler still can only mean one thing...
Yara: "Tears make everything taste better."
Speaking of tears! Whistler was not a happy baby.
Robi: "Oh my! Master Whistler whatever is the matter?"
Whistler: "Play with me? Pwease?"
How can you say no?
They are growing up so fast! Please note Shiki is there yet again. XD
Oh my Lyle! Xander is now insane, loner, perceptive, and lucky!
Yara decided to try and use a bit of celeb influence on her Mom.
Yara: "Mom, don't you think it's about time you forgive Shiki? It's been what? 40 years?"
Cadence: "52 years, 3 months, 2 days, and 18 seconds actually."
Yara: "Severe grudge aside, how about letting it go? All that anger can't be good for your complexion."
Cadence: "Oh snap, really? Well in that case..."
Shiki: (Brace yourself for it Shiki..)
Cadence: "I don't know why I am doing this.. but well, lets put the past behind us, shall we dance?"
And so many years of intense hatred was resolved thanks to star power.
Shiki: "You don't have your fists up to punch me, do you?"
Cadence: "I forgave you, but don't give me any ideas because that sounds fun."
Yara: "Robi! How long has my baby been crying and why weren't you doing anything about it? What do we pay you for? It obviously isn't for childcare as my baby is screaming. It isn't the laundry either as there is a pile knee deep in my room."
Robi: "...am I fired?"
Yara: "Not yet, just get better fast!"
Lyle was asked to come to a bar and drink a specific drink for advertisement purposes. Cadence went too. They ran into Fern and Mandrake who were still very happy in love.
Fern: "Oh dear Mandy! Look it's Lyle! Oh and my sister."
Lyle had to pay full price for his drink he was asked to advertise, while Cadence got a deep discount on hers.
Lyle: "..I am not really sure this is fair."
Bartender: "Sorry sir, company policy is to give the discount to the biggest star on the premises and unfortunately that isn't you..."
For some reason, Lyle being at a bar is an excellent trigger for labor.
Yara: "Robi! What are you doing in here right now! You can't watch my labor!"
Robi: "Master Yara! I was just doing the laundry as you requested.."
Yara: "Just do it later, sheesh!"
Robi: "I won't get fired?"
Yara: "NO NOW GO!"
Lyle got back just in the nick of time. Xander decided to lend his support.
Lyle: "Come on we're going to the hospital!"
Yara: "Last time it took 4 hours to drive across the bridge and get there so NO THANKS!"
Lyle: "This isn't safe and I can't take it!"
Lyle faints.
Yara had twins! The first Parvenu boy and girl set!
Red hair finally! And you won't believe, but they both rolled evil.
Vermont on the left is a light sleeper and evil. Virgil on the right is perceptive and evil.
They look like devils already. I am excited! So what is their very first act as toddlers...?
Vermont: "Tee-bee! Tee-bee!"
Virgil: "Mee too!"
And so they both went to the TV.
Jack: "I have heard all about your grandmother Jane Deens-Marx and I know you got this from her. This is unacceptable for my grandchildren!"
Vermont: "Hi gwampa! We watch tee-bee?"
Virgil: "Tee-bee!"
Jack: "No you don't. It's dinner then bed for both of you!"
Vermont: :(
Cadence: "You too young man!"
Virgil: "Noooooo! Me no want!"
Cadence: "I worry about these two already."
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So Jeeves is still running around the neighborhood. Apparently he has developed a strong dislike for Beau the unfortunate jawed vampire. Story progression has alerted me to this several times.
I am rooting for you Jeeves! You show him the powers of the Parvenu jaw!
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