Idina Menzel, 51, describes ‘exhausting’ IVF journey trying for 2nd baby

[hewontgo]

Idina Menzel, 51, describes 'exhausting' IVF journey trying for 2nd baby https://t.co/bbyYPbQoIW pic.twitter.com/oVRFCPA0d7
- Page Six (@PageSix) December 7, 2022
Idina Menzel candidly describes her unsuccessful IVF journey while trying to conceive another child in her upcoming documentary, to let other women know they aren’t alone

Comments

[dnttllhrry]

What is wrong with adopting, someone please tell me? I know there are mental health issues that could possibly be a factor, but so can your bio children.

[frodo]

Adoption can also be a really tough, difficult and emotional process tbh. Like I feel like people are always saying to 'just adopt', but it can be very hard to do as well.

[ahkna]

A couple I know had a baby for an entire month and they had to give it back because the bio mother changed her mind. They were absolutely grief-stricken.

[bsfan]

That's so sad. I didn't know people were allowed to change their minds like that. After a whole month too???

[nudrive]

Giving up a child can be incredibly traumatic and there are so many factors that go into it, a mother should absolutely be allowed to change her mind tf?

[dnttllhrry]

The process of having a kid is hard no matter way you cut it. This post is literally about how hard it was for Idina to go through IVF for so many years.

[ahkna]

It is so, so, so much harder than you're making it sound.

And anyone who isn't 100% prepared to deal with a child with incredible amounts of trauma, even an infant, even in the best scenarios, then they shouldn't even try to adopt.

[matsjhummels]

That last part for real. I was at a conference where the presenter (a physician) told everyone how she adopted a child but due to her work schedule had to give him back up after a few years… and used the story to sell her training course. One of the most disgusting and shameless things I’ve ever witnessed tbh

[excuseyoubitch]

this is crazy wtf, reminds me of the influencer family who gave back a kid they had for years because he had autism - you'd just never expect these people to have done that if it were their bio children so its so so fucked up

[blahblahcakes64]

This is full evil and I hope that woman falls in a manhole, good God.

[pinkspade]

from what i've read/understand it's not that adoption isn't sometimes the best option but that family reunification should be the #1 goal and no one should feel that they *have* to give up their child due to a lack of support/financial resources. there's also a lot of shit like this: https://www.nytimes.com/2017/10/06/world/canada/indigenous-forced-adoption-sixties-scoop.html and that more focus should be on preventing children from ending up in the welfare system due to systemic poverty/racism/carceral justice

[sweetwaterlane]

"it's not that adoption isn't sometimes the best option but that family reunification should be the #1 goal"

This. The goal of foster care is reunification, so you are asking people who desperately want a child to borrow and love someone else's child and then hand them back. How painful does that sound, especially if those foster parents don't know what situation the children they now love are returning to?? And most of the children that are immediately ready for adoption are older and have physical/emotional/sexual trauma which not everyone is able to cope with, and no one should be judged if they are not prepared to adopt a child with trauma. Unless we are judging all people who do not choose adoption.

[green_monsterx]

I think I understand what you're saying, it's not that you're questioning what is actually HARD about it (a lot is!), but I guess I read your comment as you wanted a kid so bad that you put yourself through multiple rounds of IVF, so why didn't you try to adopt to expand your family, as opposed to just giving up when IVF didn't work?

to which the answer to that, imo, is a lot of ppl are really weird about not* having shared DNA

[dnttllhrry]

Thank you for expounding on my og comment. I wasn’t asking what was wrong with the adoption system (a lot), rather what was wrong with them not considering it as opposed to IVF.

[micce2233]

Do we know they didn’t? Unless you pretty much buy a child through private adoption the adoption process is looong and expensive. Maybe they looked into options and decided they didn’t have it in them to go through several more years of that.

[sweetwaterlane]

A lot of people who go through IVF use sperm or egg or embryo donors, so it's really not as simple as people wanting shared DNA. They might also want the pregnancy bonding experience, which is really not for anyone to judge any more than we should judge women who don't want to be pregnant. And some people don't want to take part in the problematic adoption industry, have been traumatized by past experiences (adoptions falling through, for example) or can't bear to foster a child, fall in love, and give them back.