Thais Gibson of the Personal Development School Analyzes the "Bad Communication" on The Bachelorette

[hjalmartazar]

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I’m a big fan of the Personal Development School youtube page and was excited when I saw this on my home page this morning! (Thais Gibson founded the School, which focuses heavily on attachment theory.)

Here are some quick notes from the video, which analyzes the Greg and Katie break-up.

Comments

[darklitplanet]

i've never watched the bachelor but i'm going to use this post as an excuse to share that i just finished season one of unreal (i know, i'm late as hell) and holy shit.

[hjalmartazar]

i still haven't watched that show lol but i want to!

[darklitplanet]

the first season was a wild fun ride and it has some incredible performances, i recommend it! i imagine it's probably even funner to watch if you're familiar with dating show reality tv tropes too lol

[triggered]

That show is so good. It becomes a bit of a mess by the end but still enjoyable.

[browneyedguuurl]

The projection of so many people on their blowup was insane. They both clearly can’t communicate correctly with each other and trauma bonded, it would’ve never worked out. That doesn’t make him a monster and her deserving of his assholish response.

[simprov]

i'm a secure attachment style (55%) but i feel like even someone who was 100% secure would lose it on the bachelor. i've never watched it but i just can't imagine being able to effectively communicate in that situation. competing for love sounds like an exercise in misery, though i'm sure most of the people just want to be reality tv personalities.

[hjalmartazar]

I'm mostly anxious preoccupied and it's so on the money! (unfortunately lol).

I don't think I'd communicate as poorly as Greg did on the show, but there was another part of the episode where he saw her 1-on-1 hometown date with someone else and got upset and that's exactly as I'd be as much as I'd hate to admit it. Which is why I'd NEVER go on a show like this, I could not handle seeing someone I like "dating" other people.

[likeanunmadebed]

Attachment style 10 years ago? Trauma bonding

Now? Talking about food and sports and pop culture (I think that counts? Idk)

Did the roundup get posted early again? I can’t find it

[hjalmartazar]

the roundup is there now!

[the_pinkdress]

People always point to Clare’s season as the only example of stopping the show, but that’s not it. There have been other Bachelor/Bachelorettes who have told a contestant in private that they are choosing them, who have stopped the show closer to the end, who have said ‘I love you’ before expecting the other to propose. Here’s one example- Katie herself, immediately after insisting to Greg she would never do that lol.

Ultimately he never should have been on the show and handled himself poorly as he left, but the idea that Katie WAS going to choose him and just ~couldn’t say~ isn’t entirely accurate. She watched him have this breakdown and knew he was saying ‘I need to know if it’s me or I can’t mentally keep going’, and didn’t want to go there because she wanted 3 contestants to choose from.