Ivanka Trump Used To Blame Farts On Her Classmates; Celebs React

[frejasface]

Trips to Atlantic City, sneaking off to London-as a child, Ivanka was fun, loyal, exciting. But she always had the Trump radar for status. Lysandra Ohrstrom recounts watching her former best friend torch democracy. https://t.co/8D9H1tKjQQ
- VANITY FAIR (@VanityFair) November 17, 2020

Ivanka Trump's former best friend and maid of honor, Lysandra

Comments

[new_peteland]

Anyway, when I was a kid my dad would loudly let one rip and blame the notorious California barking spider. A thing I now say because I have fully turned into my father.

Obligatory fuck ivanka and the entire trump family.

[obliquium]

LMAO, my Dad would blame the "geese" (Did you hear that? Must be migrating geese, look up and tell me if you can see them!).

He would occasionally have silent farts that would smell like something died, and if we were in the car when they happened he'd tell us it was "stink weed" coming in from outside and to close the windows (so the smell could stay in the car and he could laugh at us gagging). My Dad was such an asshole to us when we were kids.

[misscrystal]

My mom would blame the "bayous" whenever she farted in the car. Houston has a massive network of man-made "bayous" to hold rain water. Wherever you are in the city, you're never very far away from one, so it was a pretty ingenious excuse.

[fleurs_sauvage7]

As an Australian I’m rarely shocked by wildlife... but a BARKING spider? Rad!

[madamezuzu]

ben’s opinions are not newsworthy. he is the fart ivanka blamed on her classmates.

[numara]

not her being an irl tammy from bob's burgers

[vivilicious]

Omg 😂😂😂😂😂

[kimda]

ROFL OMG

[mz_prodigette]

nnnnnn lmaooo

[madamezuzu]

where’s the video of ivanka saying how hard it was growing up rich or whatever bullshit she was spewing pre-maga?

[evett]

He would barely acknowledge me except to ask if Ivanka was the prettiest or the most popular girl in our grade. Before I learned that the Trumps have no sense of humor about themselves, I remember answering honestly that she was probably in the top five. “Who’s prettier than Ivanka?” I recall him asking once with genuine confusion, before correctly naming the two girls I’d had in mind. He described one as a young Cindy Crawford, while the other he said had a great figure.

🤢🤮

“How does your Jewish boyfriend feel when you are having sex and that necklace hits him in the face? How can you wear that thing? It just screams, ‘terrorist.’”

I would have punched her in her no chin trumpy jowls

[greenfairy_87]

A red cap screams terrorist more than any Arabic jewelry in existence

[sarahvma]

That sounds as much like him trying to find other teen girls to creep on as anything else.