[Fic] I Have Kept You In My Heart
Title : [Fic] I Have Kept You In My Heart 16.2
Pairing : Ohno/Jun, Sho/Nino, Aiba/Becky, Ohno/Nino, Eventual Jun/?
Rating : R
Summary : AU. Before Jun, there was only Nino. The man Ohno loved with everything he had, loved with such ferocity that any other emotion would pale in comparison. He was Ohno's everything, the love of his life, the person Ohno dreamed of sharing his whole life with someday. Until Nino's untimely death, six years ago.
Word count : around 2100 words
Disclaimer : fiction, yo!
Warning : Angst in large doses. Memory loss. Minor character death. One-sided love.
Note : 2nd part
(This fic is also available in AO3)
(I Have Kept You In My Heart - 16.1)
It wasn’t at all surprising to find Nino’s sister standing her ground, just as Nino did, as if she didn’t even notice she was doing it.
He was certain it was a family thing - the Ninomiya siblings didn’t only share the same facial features (he was honestly convinced Nino was the male version of his sister, looks-wise), they’re both hardheaded too, and right now, that Ninomiya trait was totally unmistakable.
“That’s not what’s important right now, Kazu!” she hissed, brandishing the necklace as if to prove her point. He’d have to agree with her there, too, to be honest; and really, anything that would keep him from being questioned directly by Nino, now, about himself and his apparent involvement with Nino before the accident would be great. Though it wasn’t like he was trying to prevent that from happening - that was certainly out of the question with him hanging around Nino, here, in the first place - but he was merely hoping to delay it for as long as he could manage it.
Right now though, her sentiment mirrored his own. If it were true that the necklace, and the pendant he was certain was his sister’s, was really where they claimed it was found the night of Nino’s accident, then he had to know, too.
After all, if all of it were true, as what Kazue was pointing out rather rudely at the moment, then it couldn’t have been a simple coincidence; a part of him was thoroughly creep out by the idea that someone he knew personally would have planted it there, much more at the fact that that someone might have been the reason Nino almost died that night.
“This! This is what’s important right now, so, would you please just let us talk to him to, I don’t know, clear this out? It’s not like we’re going to send him off to jail for this, right? And even if we want to, obviously, we can’t. And really, we just want to talk to him -“
“But you heard what he said, didn’t you?” Nino countered, jabbing a shaky thumb at Ohno. “He said he didn’t know how it got there, either.” said Nino, eyeing the plastic bag containing the necklace and pendant in question.
“And you’re saying we should just believe him?” Kazue retaliated, incredulous, eyes narrowed. “Kazu, come on, you can’t be serious.”
Nino leaned back on his wheelchair, unperturbed. “To be honest? I don’t really know who I should believe at this point. It’s obvious you’re all trying to point your finger at him for what happened to me because of that piece of nonsense crap, when it’s clear you’re not so sure about it yourself either. Until now, all of these are just speculations until proven otherwise.”
“Mom said she had that necklace and pendant checked! The DNA -“
“Then there should be some documents showing the result, right?” Nino quipped, unbothered, gaze locked on his sister’s face. “You saw it?” Kazue blinked, pinching her lips as if she was trying to understand what her brother was asking her.
“Did you see the paper, Nee-chan?” Nino prodded, unfazed. “You know how it should look like, right? Right?”
“I -“
“Did she show it to you, then?” Nino asked, cutting her off, tearing his gaze away from his sister and quickly directing it to their mother. “You did, right? Otherwise, you wouldn’t be pinning the blame to Ohno-san like that. Like you’re so sure. So, where is it? Kaa-san? If you have it, then show it to us. Give it to us right now. Let us see it.” Nino said, his voice never even wavering. Ohno wondered where he was getting this courage, this braveness, this unexpected willingness to bring up this topic that could very well question their mother’s reason for putting that piece of ‘evidence’ out in the open, when she didn’t before.
Ohno couldn’t understand it either.
It was Nino’s sister who broke the silence yet again, her expression was pinched when she shook her head. “No. No, she didn’t, but -“
“And yet you believed her,” Nino murmured, undeterred.
Kazue looked half-shocked, half-incredulous. “She is our mother, Kazunari!” she hissed, like she couldn’t actually believe what she was hearing. “Did you really think she would lie to us - to you - about this? Do you even hear yourself right now?”
“She’s not exactly making it easy for me to trust her either, Kazue,” Nino said, his tone low and sure, eyes darting towards his mother sobbing quietly next to Aiba. “I mean, she did say she wasn’t there when the accident happened, and yet she kept on insisting it might not even an accident in the first place. Did she have proof that it wasn’t?”
“The necklace -“
“Until I saw the paper showing the test they did on that thing, I won’t believe anything, Nee-chan! I refuse to,” Nino cut her off. “And even so, how can that prove anything?”
“Kazu, you almost die, alright!” she insisted, eyes wide, her voice shaking something bad. “I can’t believe you’re trying to be so rationale about this, I mean, if that necklace could point to us to who might be responsible for what happened to you that night, why wouldn’t you want us to pursue it?”
“I’m not saying that you shouldn’t,” Nino grunted, sounding so, so tired that he couldn’t help the sudden flare of worry blooming hot in his chest. “or that I don’t want to. I just don’t think you’ve thought this through, that’s what I’m saying.”
“Do you even hear yourself right now? Seriously -“
“Yes. And personally, listening to you makes me think that you’re the one who’s not hearing yourself properly right now. For all I know, this is just an elaborate plan to make the one person who could make me remember stuff I forgot, go away, which is odd, because, I thought you trusted him? I mean, just this morning, you didn’t even make a fuzz when he offered to drive for me, so, why the change of heart all of a sudden? That just doesn’t make sense, if you ask me.”
Kazue-san visibly backed down then, as if she didn’t even notice she did it. That didn’t mean she was done, though.
“Because this happened, Kazunari,” she mumbled, sounding equally exhausted, shaking the plastic bag holding the necklace and pendant inside. “Seeing this changed everything.”
“Not everything,” Nino countered, “The existence of that thing doesn’t prove anything.”
“Not yet,” she insisted.
“Suit yourself, Nee-chan,” Nino shrugged. “But I stand with what I believe in. I don’t think Ohno-san, or his sister, for that matter, had anything to do with what happened to me. If it wasn’t really an accident, like you’re insisting, I swear to you that it wasn’t him. It’s not Ohno-san. It couldn’t have been him.”
This time, Nino’s gaze zeroed in on him. “It couldn’t have been him, Nee-chan,” Nino repeated; this time, his voice was certain, as if he knew it in his heart that it couldn’t have been Ohno who might have harmed him that night. The person that might have been the cause of his accident, the one who might have been the reason he almost died.
“Am I right, Ohno-san?”
He pinched his lips and looked straight into Nino’s eyes. “Yes, you are,” he said. “I already told you this, I will kill myself first before I even think of hurting you, and they should know that,” he returned with conviction, turning to the room at large, half-wondering what was happening, why it seemed like they were all pointing their fingers at him for what happened to Nino, when everyone here should have known better.
“They ought to,” he followed, his voice quiet now, his eyes never leaving Nino’s. “They’re the ones who know how important you are to me, after all.”
+
Thanks to Ohno’s very unexpected admission, they were left alone afterwards. To be fair, he totally got why everyone had to leave after hearing him, after hearing Ohno say the last bits of what could probably have been intended for Nino’s ears alone, because, how could they not?
Ohno spoke as if he wasn’t just saying it for the heck of it, nor to point out the absurdity of what he was being accused of. He didn’t seem like he took it personally either - Nino would, to be honest, if the situation was reversed - something he didn’t know if he would applaud Ohno for or not, because, seriously, how could Ohno remain calm after being smeared at like that like a common criminal?
He had his suspicions about Ohno knowing more than he let on, but he honestly didn’t think it would be - that. The impact of what he’d heard from Ohno was massive though he still couldn’t understand any of it; he swear he couldn’t stop the wheels in his brain from spinning as Ohno wordlessly helped him out of the wheelchair and onto the nearest couch.
He wouldn’t know if he wouldn’t ask, right?
“Are you going to tell me what - what was that about or,” he paused here, giving Ohno a look. “- Are you just going to keep me guessing?” he murmured, when he was comfortably sitting on the couch and Ohno was busying himself rearranging the cushions that were thrown haphazardly on the floor.
“Ohno-san?”
Ohno took a seat beside him, tentatively, and chuckled. Nino felt his chest ached at the sound of it, something he ought to be familiar with now, whenever Ohno was near.
It didn’t mean that everything about it made sense though, because they didn’t. Nino hoped that all of that would change tonight.
“You didn’t believe them,” Ohno started, then paused, eyes darting elsewhere as he very pointedly chose not to look at Nino. “Why?”
He shrugged. “Contrary to popular belief, I’m not that stupid. Like my family seemed to think I am, unfortunately. That’s obviously the case since they’re acting like that accident did leave me alive but with a barely working brain, assuming they could coerce me into believing something as simple as this. It should be easy enough to know how stuff like that work. Or, at least I think I know. My mother - she might be telling the truth, or maybe she isn’t, but she at least have to do it better than that for me to believe her. What happened to me isn’t something you could call normal, I get that, and unless I get my memories back, no one could really actually say they know what happened to me that night, aside from me, of course,” he said, offering Ohno a smile.
“I hope that answers your question.” He added.
Ohno nodded, albeit hesitantly. “I still intend to have that necklace checked, just to be sure. And if there’s any written report of it from the medical team that took you that night, just as your mother said, I would find it. I just. I had to know it too. About what happened...”
“I won’t stop you,” he returned, grateful and equal-parts relieved. “But right now, there’s something else I want to hear from you. Not about the accident - fuck knows I’m sick of hearing stuff about that part now that I honestly don’t want to hear anymore - but about me. And you. Before the accident. Preferably stuff that no one has told me about yet.”
Ohno’s smile was still hesitant, but at least this time he was looking at Nino like he’d rather suffer the embarrassment of Nino catching him that it was difficult to look away from it.
“Are you sure I can’t talk you out of this?” Ohno whispered; he reached out, fingers drifting across Nino’s cheek like a lover’s caress, and Nino found it inexplicably hard to keep himself from leaning into the touch, but he had to.
He shook his head. “Not this time, no.”
“Believe me, you would want me to,” Ohno whispered, “After you hear everything.”
“I’ll take my chance anyway,”
“You’re going to hate me,” Ohno murmured, mouth twisting in a way that told Nino the other man was either terrified or was being cautious or both. “God, but you’re going to hate me,”
Nino hoped that wouldn’t be the case, but at this point, even he was unsure. Still, he had to know. Ohno owed him that much, at least.
“Just be honest with me, please,” he said, almost begged. “That’s all I’m asking.”
Ohno thumbed his cheek, his eyes and offered him another of those little, smiles of his. It’s soft around the edges, but also dark, and it’s the one that didn’t seem to reach his eyes despite the fact that Ohno is trying to make it seem genuine. Looking at him only served to make Nino feel like this ought to kill him too, just looking at the almost but definitely lost look on Ohno’s face, aching in all the places that count as Ohno’s thumb kept caressing his face.
“Please, O-Oh-chan?”
Ohno’s expression softened visibly, and it honestly felt like something in him physically broke at the sight of it.
“Kazu,”
(IHKYIMH - part 17)
Pairing : Ohno/Jun, Sho/Nino, Aiba/Becky, Ohno/Nino, Eventual Jun/?
Rating : R
Summary : AU. Before Jun, there was only Nino. The man Ohno loved with everything he had, loved with such ferocity that any other emotion would pale in comparison. He was Ohno's everything, the love of his life, the person Ohno dreamed of sharing his whole life with someday. Until Nino's untimely death, six years ago.
Word count : around 2100 words
Disclaimer : fiction, yo!
Warning : Angst in large doses. Memory loss. Minor character death. One-sided love.
Note : 2nd part
(This fic is also available in AO3)
(I Have Kept You In My Heart - 16.1)
It wasn’t at all surprising to find Nino’s sister standing her ground, just as Nino did, as if she didn’t even notice she was doing it.
He was certain it was a family thing - the Ninomiya siblings didn’t only share the same facial features (he was honestly convinced Nino was the male version of his sister, looks-wise), they’re both hardheaded too, and right now, that Ninomiya trait was totally unmistakable.
“That’s not what’s important right now, Kazu!” she hissed, brandishing the necklace as if to prove her point. He’d have to agree with her there, too, to be honest; and really, anything that would keep him from being questioned directly by Nino, now, about himself and his apparent involvement with Nino before the accident would be great. Though it wasn’t like he was trying to prevent that from happening - that was certainly out of the question with him hanging around Nino, here, in the first place - but he was merely hoping to delay it for as long as he could manage it.
Right now though, her sentiment mirrored his own. If it were true that the necklace, and the pendant he was certain was his sister’s, was really where they claimed it was found the night of Nino’s accident, then he had to know, too.
After all, if all of it were true, as what Kazue was pointing out rather rudely at the moment, then it couldn’t have been a simple coincidence; a part of him was thoroughly creep out by the idea that someone he knew personally would have planted it there, much more at the fact that that someone might have been the reason Nino almost died that night.
“This! This is what’s important right now, so, would you please just let us talk to him to, I don’t know, clear this out? It’s not like we’re going to send him off to jail for this, right? And even if we want to, obviously, we can’t. And really, we just want to talk to him -“
“But you heard what he said, didn’t you?” Nino countered, jabbing a shaky thumb at Ohno. “He said he didn’t know how it got there, either.” said Nino, eyeing the plastic bag containing the necklace and pendant in question.
“And you’re saying we should just believe him?” Kazue retaliated, incredulous, eyes narrowed. “Kazu, come on, you can’t be serious.”
Nino leaned back on his wheelchair, unperturbed. “To be honest? I don’t really know who I should believe at this point. It’s obvious you’re all trying to point your finger at him for what happened to me because of that piece of nonsense crap, when it’s clear you’re not so sure about it yourself either. Until now, all of these are just speculations until proven otherwise.”
“Mom said she had that necklace and pendant checked! The DNA -“
“Then there should be some documents showing the result, right?” Nino quipped, unbothered, gaze locked on his sister’s face. “You saw it?” Kazue blinked, pinching her lips as if she was trying to understand what her brother was asking her.
“Did you see the paper, Nee-chan?” Nino prodded, unfazed. “You know how it should look like, right? Right?”
“I -“
“Did she show it to you, then?” Nino asked, cutting her off, tearing his gaze away from his sister and quickly directing it to their mother. “You did, right? Otherwise, you wouldn’t be pinning the blame to Ohno-san like that. Like you’re so sure. So, where is it? Kaa-san? If you have it, then show it to us. Give it to us right now. Let us see it.” Nino said, his voice never even wavering. Ohno wondered where he was getting this courage, this braveness, this unexpected willingness to bring up this topic that could very well question their mother’s reason for putting that piece of ‘evidence’ out in the open, when she didn’t before.
Ohno couldn’t understand it either.
It was Nino’s sister who broke the silence yet again, her expression was pinched when she shook her head. “No. No, she didn’t, but -“
“And yet you believed her,” Nino murmured, undeterred.
Kazue looked half-shocked, half-incredulous. “She is our mother, Kazunari!” she hissed, like she couldn’t actually believe what she was hearing. “Did you really think she would lie to us - to you - about this? Do you even hear yourself right now?”
“She’s not exactly making it easy for me to trust her either, Kazue,” Nino said, his tone low and sure, eyes darting towards his mother sobbing quietly next to Aiba. “I mean, she did say she wasn’t there when the accident happened, and yet she kept on insisting it might not even an accident in the first place. Did she have proof that it wasn’t?”
“The necklace -“
“Until I saw the paper showing the test they did on that thing, I won’t believe anything, Nee-chan! I refuse to,” Nino cut her off. “And even so, how can that prove anything?”
“Kazu, you almost die, alright!” she insisted, eyes wide, her voice shaking something bad. “I can’t believe you’re trying to be so rationale about this, I mean, if that necklace could point to us to who might be responsible for what happened to you that night, why wouldn’t you want us to pursue it?”
“I’m not saying that you shouldn’t,” Nino grunted, sounding so, so tired that he couldn’t help the sudden flare of worry blooming hot in his chest. “or that I don’t want to. I just don’t think you’ve thought this through, that’s what I’m saying.”
“Do you even hear yourself right now? Seriously -“
“Yes. And personally, listening to you makes me think that you’re the one who’s not hearing yourself properly right now. For all I know, this is just an elaborate plan to make the one person who could make me remember stuff I forgot, go away, which is odd, because, I thought you trusted him? I mean, just this morning, you didn’t even make a fuzz when he offered to drive for me, so, why the change of heart all of a sudden? That just doesn’t make sense, if you ask me.”
Kazue-san visibly backed down then, as if she didn’t even notice she did it. That didn’t mean she was done, though.
“Because this happened, Kazunari,” she mumbled, sounding equally exhausted, shaking the plastic bag holding the necklace and pendant inside. “Seeing this changed everything.”
“Not everything,” Nino countered, “The existence of that thing doesn’t prove anything.”
“Not yet,” she insisted.
“Suit yourself, Nee-chan,” Nino shrugged. “But I stand with what I believe in. I don’t think Ohno-san, or his sister, for that matter, had anything to do with what happened to me. If it wasn’t really an accident, like you’re insisting, I swear to you that it wasn’t him. It’s not Ohno-san. It couldn’t have been him.”
This time, Nino’s gaze zeroed in on him. “It couldn’t have been him, Nee-chan,” Nino repeated; this time, his voice was certain, as if he knew it in his heart that it couldn’t have been Ohno who might have harmed him that night. The person that might have been the cause of his accident, the one who might have been the reason he almost died.
“Am I right, Ohno-san?”
He pinched his lips and looked straight into Nino’s eyes. “Yes, you are,” he said. “I already told you this, I will kill myself first before I even think of hurting you, and they should know that,” he returned with conviction, turning to the room at large, half-wondering what was happening, why it seemed like they were all pointing their fingers at him for what happened to Nino, when everyone here should have known better.
“They ought to,” he followed, his voice quiet now, his eyes never leaving Nino’s. “They’re the ones who know how important you are to me, after all.”
+
Thanks to Ohno’s very unexpected admission, they were left alone afterwards. To be fair, he totally got why everyone had to leave after hearing him, after hearing Ohno say the last bits of what could probably have been intended for Nino’s ears alone, because, how could they not?
Ohno spoke as if he wasn’t just saying it for the heck of it, nor to point out the absurdity of what he was being accused of. He didn’t seem like he took it personally either - Nino would, to be honest, if the situation was reversed - something he didn’t know if he would applaud Ohno for or not, because, seriously, how could Ohno remain calm after being smeared at like that like a common criminal?
He had his suspicions about Ohno knowing more than he let on, but he honestly didn’t think it would be - that. The impact of what he’d heard from Ohno was massive though he still couldn’t understand any of it; he swear he couldn’t stop the wheels in his brain from spinning as Ohno wordlessly helped him out of the wheelchair and onto the nearest couch.
He wouldn’t know if he wouldn’t ask, right?
“Are you going to tell me what - what was that about or,” he paused here, giving Ohno a look. “- Are you just going to keep me guessing?” he murmured, when he was comfortably sitting on the couch and Ohno was busying himself rearranging the cushions that were thrown haphazardly on the floor.
“Ohno-san?”
Ohno took a seat beside him, tentatively, and chuckled. Nino felt his chest ached at the sound of it, something he ought to be familiar with now, whenever Ohno was near.
It didn’t mean that everything about it made sense though, because they didn’t. Nino hoped that all of that would change tonight.
“You didn’t believe them,” Ohno started, then paused, eyes darting elsewhere as he very pointedly chose not to look at Nino. “Why?”
He shrugged. “Contrary to popular belief, I’m not that stupid. Like my family seemed to think I am, unfortunately. That’s obviously the case since they’re acting like that accident did leave me alive but with a barely working brain, assuming they could coerce me into believing something as simple as this. It should be easy enough to know how stuff like that work. Or, at least I think I know. My mother - she might be telling the truth, or maybe she isn’t, but she at least have to do it better than that for me to believe her. What happened to me isn’t something you could call normal, I get that, and unless I get my memories back, no one could really actually say they know what happened to me that night, aside from me, of course,” he said, offering Ohno a smile.
“I hope that answers your question.” He added.
Ohno nodded, albeit hesitantly. “I still intend to have that necklace checked, just to be sure. And if there’s any written report of it from the medical team that took you that night, just as your mother said, I would find it. I just. I had to know it too. About what happened...”
“I won’t stop you,” he returned, grateful and equal-parts relieved. “But right now, there’s something else I want to hear from you. Not about the accident - fuck knows I’m sick of hearing stuff about that part now that I honestly don’t want to hear anymore - but about me. And you. Before the accident. Preferably stuff that no one has told me about yet.”
Ohno’s smile was still hesitant, but at least this time he was looking at Nino like he’d rather suffer the embarrassment of Nino catching him that it was difficult to look away from it.
“Are you sure I can’t talk you out of this?” Ohno whispered; he reached out, fingers drifting across Nino’s cheek like a lover’s caress, and Nino found it inexplicably hard to keep himself from leaning into the touch, but he had to.
He shook his head. “Not this time, no.”
“Believe me, you would want me to,” Ohno whispered, “After you hear everything.”
“I’ll take my chance anyway,”
“You’re going to hate me,” Ohno murmured, mouth twisting in a way that told Nino the other man was either terrified or was being cautious or both. “God, but you’re going to hate me,”
Nino hoped that wouldn’t be the case, but at this point, even he was unsure. Still, he had to know. Ohno owed him that much, at least.
“Just be honest with me, please,” he said, almost begged. “That’s all I’m asking.”
Ohno thumbed his cheek, his eyes and offered him another of those little, smiles of his. It’s soft around the edges, but also dark, and it’s the one that didn’t seem to reach his eyes despite the fact that Ohno is trying to make it seem genuine. Looking at him only served to make Nino feel like this ought to kill him too, just looking at the almost but definitely lost look on Ohno’s face, aching in all the places that count as Ohno’s thumb kept caressing his face.
“Please, O-Oh-chan?”
Ohno’s expression softened visibly, and it honestly felt like something in him physically broke at the sight of it.
“Kazu,”
(IHKYIMH - part 17)