Look, I know you don't even know me, and you have no reason whatsoever to listen to what I have to say, but I'm gonna say a thing or two anyway, and you can do whatever you want with it. My perspective in this situation comes as someone who has not really ever had a long-distance relationship, but did have a scumbag cheating boyfriend for several years.
So... over and over again, he's congratulating himself for being honest with you while simultaneously setting up the argument for why he IS going to cheat, WHEN he cheats.
He's letting future-him off the hook. He tried to be a nice guy, he tried to do the right thing, but this damned loneliness and testosterone and instinct and college is just different, you wouldn't understand, and none of it is his fault. He doesn't once actually take responsibility for it, he just lists reasons why the URGE wasn't his fault, but his magnificent restraint, of course, IS. But next time, maybe he just won't be strong enough, and that would be really sad, and he's already sorry for it
( ... )
Your words were a perfect echo of everything I already knew and felt. I wrote him a letter telling him that I was leaving, which I didn't end up reading to him. I just told him how he hurt me, and we talked, and I left. I broke up with him, because I don't deserve that kind of hurt. I didn't do anything. I have been so loyal to him.
Thank you so much for taking the time to read that awful conversation and for encouraging me to do the right thing. I appreciate it very, very much.
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So... over and over again, he's congratulating himself for being honest with you while simultaneously setting up the argument for why he IS going to cheat, WHEN he cheats.
He's letting future-him off the hook. He tried to be a nice guy, he tried to do the right thing, but this damned loneliness and testosterone and instinct and college is just different, you wouldn't understand, and none of it is his fault. He doesn't once actually take responsibility for it, he just lists reasons why the URGE wasn't his fault, but his magnificent restraint, of course, IS. But next time, maybe he just won't be strong enough, and that would be really sad, and he's already sorry for it ( ... )
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Thank you so much for taking the time to read that awful conversation and for encouraging me to do the right thing. I appreciate it very, very much.
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