(Untitled)

[ofoz]

If you're foolish enough to accept anything this town gives you, I suppose you deserve what's coming from it.

I will not be participating. I have nothing to thank this town for. I suggest you all follow my example and destroy the absurd bird they've gifted each home with.

Comments

phone

[ofoz]

I'm going to set it on fire.

[godisachild]

Smart move.

[ofoz]

Either that or a disastrous one. We shall see.

[godisachild]

Guess so. It was a trick last year, so I've got no reason not to think it won't be one this year.

[ofoz]

As I was informed by the ever-so-kind gentleman on the telephone. Do they normally announce their heinous deeds so nonchalantly?

Phone

[causticat]

Why should anyone be so foolish as to destroy free food?

[Spoken through a mouthful of turkey.]

Phone

[ofoz]

All of the food here is free.

Phone

[causticat]

Then why waste any of it?

Phone

[ofoz]

A phone calls out, insisting that the turkey is plain, contains no razorblades, and will not explode. That doesn't seem suspicious to you in the slightest?

Phone

[atent_dead]

Anyone who's really lookin' can see something ain't right about this.

Phone

[ofoz]

It seems like half the town might be blind, at this rate.

Re: Phone

[atent_dead]

Really lookin's a rare talent.

[ofoz]

I find it's one of my few remaining talents. Unfortunately, getting people to listen to what I have to say doesn't seem to work as well as it used to.

[ceilingdemonis]

[Do you know what Amaimon was excited about? A whole roasted turkey.

Do you know what Amaimon can no longer find within the entire house...? A whole roasted turkey.

Guess who has overturned everything in the house looking for it? Yeah. I bet you guessed right. He stops midway through lifting the couch to look when he hears Ozma's phone call.]]

Destroy the bird?

[oh no you just did not.]

... [He finishes flipping the couch over for no particular reason before turning around to stare at her.] That was my turkey.

[ofoz]

It didn't have your name on it. [Sorry Amaimon, did you want more of a reaction than that? She sets the phone down on the hook and gives him the most incredulous look she can muster.]

Was flipping the poor couch over really a necessity?

[ceilingdemonis]

It was in my house. I did not need my name on it.

[But if that's what it takes, she's going to regret saying that when all the food in the house ends up with his name written on it later on.]

...yes. [because fuck you, couch, that's why.]

[ofoz]

It was a danger to us all. I removed the temptation.

This entire room is a mess.