[Lamento] Warmth, Part 1
Title: Warmth
Fandom: Lamento - Beyond the Void
Part: 1/?
Rating: G
Warnings: none
Characters: Rai, Kagari, Leaks
Disclaimer: Not mine.
Notes: This is a series of drabbles (read: mini-fics) centered around the theme "warmth". There are so many different kinds of warmth in the game, and so many characters longing for it in one form or another, that I thought it would be interesting to collect them all and try to write from their various viewpoints.
Part I | Part II
Warmth
Series One
Rai
The man is strange, but his manner is stranger.
He sings when he is cooking, which happens quite often. Rai has never heard anybody sing during work, and certainly not like that, loud and enthusiastic and wrong.
He pauses, lowering his knife from the stick he is carving, ears twitching as the man misses another high note. It's a strange song, too, something about... ladies, and dancing, and... bosoms? Rai doesn't know what a bosom is, but from what he does understand of the song, it's probably not something he wants to know, anyway.
Perhaps he should go down once the singing and the banging of pots and cabinets stop.
Another strange thing about the man is that he always leaves some of the stuff he cooks outside for Rai to grab. Rai doesn't know why, just like he doesn't know why the man doesn't mind him staying in his attic, why he lied to father-Rai has never met anybody who would lie to father, but he certainly won't complain.
The lie saved him from the stick, and the attic gives him somewhere to stay. He definitely won't complain about free food, because although the man is a horrible singer, he is a really good cook.
The food does odd things to Rai, makes him less wary, less cautious when he shouldn't be, because he doesn't know what will happen if the man finds out that he likes...
Last time, he was really stupid, sneaking up while the man was still singing in the kitchen, and the food was so hot that he burnt his tongue, to boot. Today, he will wait, even though the smell is tempting.
He'll wait until all is quiet. It's safer that way.
When he finally clambers down from the attic window, creeping up to the kitchen entrance, the man is long gone, pots and pans sparkling on the counter. There is a bowl of candied kuims sitting on the windowsill, sweet and dark pink and shining with melted honey.
They are cool and sticky between his fingers, but when he puts them in his mouth, for some reason, they seem warm.
* * * * *
Kagari
She hasn't been able to sleep well, lately, restless thoughts keeping her awake, dream voices jerking her out of her uneasy slumber.
"That's a lie! Kaya wouldn't do that!"
"Kagari, why are you...?"
"There they are! Kill the traitors!"
There is guilt, so much guilt piled up over the years, but during the day, she has her duties to attend to and cannot spare the attention for personal issues. She hates that guilt, that it even exists-
It's that bastard's fault, it's all his fault.
But she knows that is not true.
If I hadn't brought them there, you could have- I'm sorry, Kaya. I'm so sorry.
She hates that the guilt has come back to haunt her after all these years, even though Kaya forgave everything, even though she cradled the monster she had born and resolved to love it, even though she smiled bravely in the face of Kira's scorn, raised a bastard child who was no longer a monster and called the one who had betrayed her-not intentionally, never intentionally-her sister.
But Kagari knows that Kaya's wasting illness was as much in the heart as it was in the body.
It reminds her of an old saying, 'When a lovebird dies, the other one gives up on living to join its mate.'
She hates that thought, too, that it should have been that bastard who would break Kaya, fierce, strong, indomitable Kaya, who would take so much from her that she would stop fighting. That she would leave them. Leave her.
A sudden noise nearby almost sends her bolting off the bed, claws at the ready-
-to tear into the small child standing at her cot, staring at her with wide, dark eyes.
Of course. Of course...
Slowly, she lowers her hand, not quite able to say "sorry."
It has been two weeks, but she still doesn't quite know what to do with Asato, feels uncomfortable under that gaze-Kaya's eyes but not-following her wherever she goes, begging for something she doesn't know how to give.
"...What is it?" Gentleness is not something that comes to her naturally-between the two of them, it was Kaya who knew how to be both sweet and strong-making her wonder if her voice is sounding unnatural only to her own ears, or to his as well.
"Kagari is sad."
His tone makes her blink, so knowing and matter-of-fact. She frowns, not knowing how to reply, not quite able to summon a lie.
"...I'm sad, too," he says, his ears lowered.
"Asato..." Saying his name is still odd; she is not good with children, and didn't speak to him often even when Kaya was still alive, doesn't really remember ever calling his name, even though none of it is the boy's fault.
His ears perk again, and even in the shadows, she can see his small, hopeful smile.
"I thought... maybe we can be less sad together?"
The words confuse her momentarily, but then she realizes what he is asking for. "I..."
She does not know what makes her give in, whether it is those eyes, or a distant memory-
Two little girls and one bed, cold feet and ghost tales and twittering laughter.
-but after a minute of hesitation, she turns away, silently making room.
Asato climbs up into her cot, and she expects him to snuggle up to her or ask to be hugged, but he does neither. Instead, he simply curls up like an infant, tail wrapping around his legs, a tiny, solid spot of warmth against her side.
That night, the voices stay silent.
* * * * *
Leaks
He remembers seeing the ocean once, long ago, during his wanderings.
Poems have been written about its beauty, but he remembers looking at those radiant golden waters and hating them-hating their vastness, hiding secrets below and beyond, hating that for all the questions they inspired, they never seemed to yield an answer. Hating that he feared drowning in those questions, should he dare to delve into the waves, just wading in and feeling the roll of the tide, the pull of the current, seeking to consume him with its enigma.
Here is much like the sea, vast and fathomless, though he is never awake enough, never aware enough, to see for himself. The invisible tide is rocking him, not a roiling force but gentle, so gentle, and he always thought that such depths should feel darker, colder-
"Mama, mama! Look at the butterflies!"
Laughter, twofold, one childishly high and boisterous, the other feminine and delighted.
"I am looking, dear."
"Pick me up, mama! I wanna fly!"
More laughter-"Oof, you're getting heavy"-and he is lifted from the ground, high into the air, past that smiling face with the warm amber eyes, the most beautiful face in the world, and then he's spinning, soaring, swaying like the butterflies in the summer breeze...
It takes him a moment to realize, to remember-mother wasn't like that, mother never laughed, never touched, always afraid-
The memory isn't his, it never was, but it feels like it wants to be part of him, or maybe wants him to be a part of it, and that doesn't seem so bad, not when it's so full of color and light.
Once upon a time, he used to be afraid of drowning, not just the sea, but so many other things, even good things, things he never knew could be so-
He shifts a little and the sea allows it, washes over him in lapping waves, not threateningly, but gently, gently...
"Are you tired?"
Very.
"Would you like me to sing you to sleep, Leaks?"
Laughter in that voice, and long ago, he thinks he would have said no, would have been angry at the preposterousness of the question, but now...
Yes.
The melody that comes is soft and sweet, and at first it seems like there are two people singing, two voices twining around each other, melting together, but then there is only one, close, so close to him...
He curls into it, around it, thinks he can feel a touch in his hair, but isn't sure...
It is getting hard to concentrate again, but that is all right, as long as that voice stays.
He thinks a long time ago, he didn't like it, didn't like the things it made him feel, but doesn't know for certain...
It's hard to remember, but he doesn't think he's ever been so...
So...
Warm.
-TBC-
----
A/N: And that's it for now. I've got several other characters lined up, so I hope I'll be able to post more soon. In the meantime, C&C is of course very welcome.
Now for some author blab:
- Kagari is an incredibly fascinating character, and one who I think has a lot of unresolved issues. Asato's drama makes it sound like it was her inadvertently leading the Kira zealots to Kaya, who was meeting Kaltz in secret, so I wanted to spin that idea a bit further.
- Yes, Asato was born in the shape of a monster. No, he cannot change into one at will.
- Leaks' piece, in case it isn't clear, is set after the ending (no matter the route), where he is slowly fading into Konoe's soul. I always thought that it was incredibly sad that the game never allowed for some sort of reconciliation between him and Shui, or at least for Leaks to realize that Shui had been true to him all along, so I wanted to write something about that.
Continue to Part II? >>
<< Return to Lamento Index | Return to Fanfiction Index >>
Fandom: Lamento - Beyond the Void
Part: 1/?
Rating: G
Warnings: none
Characters: Rai, Kagari, Leaks
Disclaimer: Not mine.
Notes: This is a series of drabbles (read: mini-fics) centered around the theme "warmth". There are so many different kinds of warmth in the game, and so many characters longing for it in one form or another, that I thought it would be interesting to collect them all and try to write from their various viewpoints.
Part I | Part II
Warmth
Series One
Rai
The man is strange, but his manner is stranger.
He sings when he is cooking, which happens quite often. Rai has never heard anybody sing during work, and certainly not like that, loud and enthusiastic and wrong.
He pauses, lowering his knife from the stick he is carving, ears twitching as the man misses another high note. It's a strange song, too, something about... ladies, and dancing, and... bosoms? Rai doesn't know what a bosom is, but from what he does understand of the song, it's probably not something he wants to know, anyway.
Perhaps he should go down once the singing and the banging of pots and cabinets stop.
Another strange thing about the man is that he always leaves some of the stuff he cooks outside for Rai to grab. Rai doesn't know why, just like he doesn't know why the man doesn't mind him staying in his attic, why he lied to father-Rai has never met anybody who would lie to father, but he certainly won't complain.
The lie saved him from the stick, and the attic gives him somewhere to stay. He definitely won't complain about free food, because although the man is a horrible singer, he is a really good cook.
The food does odd things to Rai, makes him less wary, less cautious when he shouldn't be, because he doesn't know what will happen if the man finds out that he likes...
Last time, he was really stupid, sneaking up while the man was still singing in the kitchen, and the food was so hot that he burnt his tongue, to boot. Today, he will wait, even though the smell is tempting.
He'll wait until all is quiet. It's safer that way.
When he finally clambers down from the attic window, creeping up to the kitchen entrance, the man is long gone, pots and pans sparkling on the counter. There is a bowl of candied kuims sitting on the windowsill, sweet and dark pink and shining with melted honey.
They are cool and sticky between his fingers, but when he puts them in his mouth, for some reason, they seem warm.
* * * * *
Kagari
She hasn't been able to sleep well, lately, restless thoughts keeping her awake, dream voices jerking her out of her uneasy slumber.
"That's a lie! Kaya wouldn't do that!"
"Kagari, why are you...?"
"There they are! Kill the traitors!"
There is guilt, so much guilt piled up over the years, but during the day, she has her duties to attend to and cannot spare the attention for personal issues. She hates that guilt, that it even exists-
It's that bastard's fault, it's all his fault.
But she knows that is not true.
If I hadn't brought them there, you could have- I'm sorry, Kaya. I'm so sorry.
She hates that the guilt has come back to haunt her after all these years, even though Kaya forgave everything, even though she cradled the monster she had born and resolved to love it, even though she smiled bravely in the face of Kira's scorn, raised a bastard child who was no longer a monster and called the one who had betrayed her-not intentionally, never intentionally-her sister.
But Kagari knows that Kaya's wasting illness was as much in the heart as it was in the body.
It reminds her of an old saying, 'When a lovebird dies, the other one gives up on living to join its mate.'
She hates that thought, too, that it should have been that bastard who would break Kaya, fierce, strong, indomitable Kaya, who would take so much from her that she would stop fighting. That she would leave them. Leave her.
A sudden noise nearby almost sends her bolting off the bed, claws at the ready-
-to tear into the small child standing at her cot, staring at her with wide, dark eyes.
Of course. Of course...
Slowly, she lowers her hand, not quite able to say "sorry."
It has been two weeks, but she still doesn't quite know what to do with Asato, feels uncomfortable under that gaze-Kaya's eyes but not-following her wherever she goes, begging for something she doesn't know how to give.
"...What is it?" Gentleness is not something that comes to her naturally-between the two of them, it was Kaya who knew how to be both sweet and strong-making her wonder if her voice is sounding unnatural only to her own ears, or to his as well.
"Kagari is sad."
His tone makes her blink, so knowing and matter-of-fact. She frowns, not knowing how to reply, not quite able to summon a lie.
"...I'm sad, too," he says, his ears lowered.
"Asato..." Saying his name is still odd; she is not good with children, and didn't speak to him often even when Kaya was still alive, doesn't really remember ever calling his name, even though none of it is the boy's fault.
His ears perk again, and even in the shadows, she can see his small, hopeful smile.
"I thought... maybe we can be less sad together?"
The words confuse her momentarily, but then she realizes what he is asking for. "I..."
She does not know what makes her give in, whether it is those eyes, or a distant memory-
Two little girls and one bed, cold feet and ghost tales and twittering laughter.
-but after a minute of hesitation, she turns away, silently making room.
Asato climbs up into her cot, and she expects him to snuggle up to her or ask to be hugged, but he does neither. Instead, he simply curls up like an infant, tail wrapping around his legs, a tiny, solid spot of warmth against her side.
That night, the voices stay silent.
* * * * *
Leaks
He remembers seeing the ocean once, long ago, during his wanderings.
Poems have been written about its beauty, but he remembers looking at those radiant golden waters and hating them-hating their vastness, hiding secrets below and beyond, hating that for all the questions they inspired, they never seemed to yield an answer. Hating that he feared drowning in those questions, should he dare to delve into the waves, just wading in and feeling the roll of the tide, the pull of the current, seeking to consume him with its enigma.
Here is much like the sea, vast and fathomless, though he is never awake enough, never aware enough, to see for himself. The invisible tide is rocking him, not a roiling force but gentle, so gentle, and he always thought that such depths should feel darker, colder-
"Mama, mama! Look at the butterflies!"
Laughter, twofold, one childishly high and boisterous, the other feminine and delighted.
"I am looking, dear."
"Pick me up, mama! I wanna fly!"
More laughter-"Oof, you're getting heavy"-and he is lifted from the ground, high into the air, past that smiling face with the warm amber eyes, the most beautiful face in the world, and then he's spinning, soaring, swaying like the butterflies in the summer breeze...
It takes him a moment to realize, to remember-mother wasn't like that, mother never laughed, never touched, always afraid-
The memory isn't his, it never was, but it feels like it wants to be part of him, or maybe wants him to be a part of it, and that doesn't seem so bad, not when it's so full of color and light.
Once upon a time, he used to be afraid of drowning, not just the sea, but so many other things, even good things, things he never knew could be so-
He shifts a little and the sea allows it, washes over him in lapping waves, not threateningly, but gently, gently...
"Are you tired?"
Very.
"Would you like me to sing you to sleep, Leaks?"
Laughter in that voice, and long ago, he thinks he would have said no, would have been angry at the preposterousness of the question, but now...
Yes.
The melody that comes is soft and sweet, and at first it seems like there are two people singing, two voices twining around each other, melting together, but then there is only one, close, so close to him...
He curls into it, around it, thinks he can feel a touch in his hair, but isn't sure...
It is getting hard to concentrate again, but that is all right, as long as that voice stays.
He thinks a long time ago, he didn't like it, didn't like the things it made him feel, but doesn't know for certain...
It's hard to remember, but he doesn't think he's ever been so...
So...
Warm.
-TBC-
----
A/N: And that's it for now. I've got several other characters lined up, so I hope I'll be able to post more soon. In the meantime, C&C is of course very welcome.
Now for some author blab:
- Kagari is an incredibly fascinating character, and one who I think has a lot of unresolved issues. Asato's drama makes it sound like it was her inadvertently leading the Kira zealots to Kaya, who was meeting Kaltz in secret, so I wanted to spin that idea a bit further.
- Yes, Asato was born in the shape of a monster. No, he cannot change into one at will.
- Leaks' piece, in case it isn't clear, is set after the ending (no matter the route), where he is slowly fading into Konoe's soul. I always thought that it was incredibly sad that the game never allowed for some sort of reconciliation between him and Shui, or at least for Leaks to realize that Shui had been true to him all along, so I wanted to write something about that.
Continue to Part II? >>
<< Return to Lamento Index | Return to Fanfiction Index >>