[SC28] Imprints In The Snow
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: HenHae
Genre: AU!Romance, Drama
Theme: Skates, Phrase to include: "what comes around, goes around"
Summary: He returned unwillingly to the place he barely remembered, only knowing that he hated the overwhelming frigid weather. Yet he didn't realize the tears he had caused, the naive innocence he carelessly took away, whose heart he had unknowingly broken.
-
Donghae sighed as he looked out the window, the snow continually fell and despite its somewhat calming scene, it drove him insane.
"Why did we have to come here of all places? Its freezing." Donghae huddled further into his comforter, beneath he wore plenty of thermals, sweaters and an extra jacket.
"But we haven't been here in since we were kids." Siwon reasoned. "It's been ten years already since we've been to your uncle's winter home... Isn't it nostaglic?" He looked off in a daze, Donghae lowered his eyes.
"You may enjoy this, but I'm not. I just want to go home."
Siwon sighed as he laid against the wall. "You never liked the cold, even back then."
"Yes, something my parents tend to forget. Which, why did you even agree to go? My parents backing out was my only chance to stay home and then you just had to open your big mouth."
Siwon pursed his lips. "But I wanted to come back here... It sounded fun."
Donghae sighed heavily as he looked out the window, the snow didn't seem like it would ever stop falling as it continued to pile up on the ground. "What's so great about this place anyway?" He murmured.
The thought of staying in such a frigid place for three weeks annoyed him to no end. He had always turned down all offers from his uncle but now here he was, trapped in such place with no way back home.
Siwon was cooking in the kitchen when he heard Donghae sigh again. He didn't look up as he chopped up the food. "Uncle kept some photo albums on the table, why don't you look through them?"
"Not interested." Donghae replied, Siwon heard another sigh and he paused his knife.
"Just look through them, it'll help pass the time quicker." Donghae somehow doubted that but his own boredom was getting the best of him. He reached for the album and pulled it towards him, he flipped through the pages, barely registering anything when he stopped in one page.
It was a faded picture of two figures standing on the frozen lake, he tilted his head, trying to remember why it seemed so familiar. After a few more minutes he huffed in frustration. "Siwon! Come over here." Siwon quickly washed his hands and walked over. Siwon peered over his shoulder at the picture and clapped in realization.
"That's you and Henry." Donghae furrowed his eyebrows.
"Henry?" He asked, Siwon nodded.
"Remember those neighbors nearby? They had a son that used to play with us, nearly every day he went to see us. I remember that in this picture, you were ice skating together..." He slapped Donghae's shoulders. "How can you not remember him?"
Donghae simply shrugged. "I think I hated the cold enough that I repressed most of it." He squinted his eyes at the picture. "That and its not exactly high quality... it'd be easier if I could actually see this kid's face."
"Your memory hasn't always been the best, even now that we're in college has it made you miss your classes." Siwon returned to kitchen when Donghae smiled at his statement, he couldn't believe Siwon had actually believed that excuse but decided not to correct him.
-
After five days cooped up in the house, he decided that despite the cold, he at least needed to get out. He was lucky that it was just slightly warmer and he had recently stolen Siwon's insulated jackets. He trudged through the snow when he took a haphazard step and fell completely into three feet of snow. He cursed under his breath as he lifted up his face and wiped the snow away from it. He sighed to himself, this may have been a bad idea.
He lifted himself by his arms when he noted a short distance away a lake that was completely frozen. There he recognized the back of someone sitting down on the edge of it, Donghae rose himself up completely and patted the snow away. He decided to walk closer and was only a few steps away from the young man. Donghae recognized that he was putting on ice skates.
"Is it even safe to do that?" Donghae asked.
"It's safer than talking to random strangers." The young man replied, Donghae shrugged it off.
"You have a point I guess." The young man finished tying them and pushed himself up. He steadied himself as he skated skillfully across the ice, Donghae watched him go on.
"You don't seem to care for the snow." The young man called out a short while later.
Donghae scoffed. "This type of place is horrible."
"This type of place is beautiful, you're the one who's horrible."
Donghae arched an eyebrow. "Aren't we rude? You really should be polite to people you just met."
The young man gave a bitter smile as he paused momentarily on the ice. "Just met." He muttered. "Forgetting someone is also quite rude."
Donghae gave a perplexed look. "Do I know you?"
The young man gave a slight shrug. "It's not important." He slid quickly to the snow and began to take off his skates.
Donghae remained quiet as he watched the man roughly take off his skates and put on his shoes and stormed off. He heard Siwon call out his name and turned to face his panting expression.
"Finally, you could have at least told me you were going outside. I was worried." He smiled and gestured behind him. "How was it seeing Henry again?" Donghae blinked when he recalled Siwon's earlier explanation and furrowed his eyebrows as he also relived their conversation.
"Did Henry hate me?" Donghae asked, they had returned to the house when Siwon looked up as he folded the laundry.
"Hate you?" Siwon arched both eyebrows. "He never hated you, on the contrary he... well, don't you remember?"
Donghae raised an eyebrow when Siwon said incredulously. "I can't believe you forgot."
"I can't help it, now help refresh my memory."
Siwon sighed. "He always tagged around us, but he always liked to do so more with you. It was obvious that he felt something for you."
Donghae widened his eyes. "He liked me?"
Siwon scoffed. "He would always hug you, grab your hand, call you and even-How can you not remember?! This kid practically adored and admired you and you just-you...I can't even talk to you right now." Siwon folded the last bit of laundry and took the piles with him.
-
To try to trigger his memories, Donghae went through the various photo albums, searching for pictures of that particular winter. He was growing frustrated, how could there be so little proof?
He was about to give up when he found an album that looked worn out, he opened it and took a deep breath, he found it. The first three pics were of him and Henry, and it continued like that throughout the pages. There'd occasionally be pictures of Siwon but nearly every picture was just the two of them.
Yet Donghae noticed something, aside from the smiling Henry in all the pictures, in contrast was a stolid Donghae. There wasn't a single picture where he smiled or even laughed, somehow it was that realization alone that made him remember that winter.
The memories flooded through him as he recalled his bitter outlook, one that mimicked those of most rebellious teenagers. He had wanted nothing to do with the young kid, Henry was a nuisance that he couldn't shake off. Henry always had to see him, always had to call him, always just had to be there despite Donghae's protests. This kid who ignored all of his insults and would always greet him with that smile, it had annoyed him completely. He was heartless to say the least.
That's when he remembered his last day he had ever been here, he was rushing to put away his things in the car. Already in the backseat waiting to leave from the retched place when Siwon rushed by and asked where Uncle was so that they could wait a bit longer. Donghae asked him why.
"Henry called, he wants to say goodbye to you." Donghae huffed.
"Let's just go."
"But Henry-"
"Let's go, I'm done with this place." Donghae stated, he had made Siwon not mention a word to Uncle and soon enough the car drove off. Without mention of it he soon enough forgot that winter, drowning himself in what he thought was important. Enjoying the high school life and involving himself in the worst of things, thinking that maybe no one truly care, that everyone only saw the worst in him. Not remembering that there was a person back at this place who saw him as someone valuable, the type of person Donghae honestly thought he never was.
Donghae sighed as he closed the photo album and looked back at the window. The memory of that faded picture also resurfaced, Henry had dragged him to the frozen lake, excited that it was now hard enough to skate over. Donghae soon found himself on the ice with loaned skates, he knew how but Henry struggled to stay leveled. Henry kept trying when he nearly fell onto the ground, Donghae out of reflex held his arms when he saw that flash. Siwon had taken the picture without his knowledge.
He felt guilt crept in but tried to brush it aside to no avail.
-
Henry's address had remained the same as he walked over there. He was about to knock when the door opened, Henry was startled to find him there.
"What do you want?" He asked.
Donghae ignored his rude tone, he reminded himself that he deserved it. "I... I wanted to apologize for what I did back then Henry."
Henry scoffed. "You actually remember me now? How thoughtful of you." He closed the door behind him and walked past Donghae.
"I know, I was a horrible person-"
"Still are." Henry corrected, Donghae took a deep breath.
"I am a horrible person, that's why I'm here to apologize-"
"I don't need it." Henry stated, not daring to turn around or even meet his eyes. "I've long chosen to get over that and just because you decide to feel guilty after ten years, doesn't mean I'll give you the satisfaction of being forgiven just to feel better about yourself."
Henry tried to walk off again when Donghae grabbed his forearm. "I know, I don't expect any forgiveness from you but at least let me properly apologize to you. Its the least I could do, and even if you walk out on me again I'll just keep following you until you hear it all."
Henry forced a laugh. "Funny how life works," He turned his head and met Donghae's eyes. "I was always the one chasing after you, but now I see that the tables have turned." He forced his arm away and walked away from Donghae who remained frozen where he was.
When Donghae had finally managed to move and get himself back to the house, Siwon barged him with questions with where he's been and what he had been doing. Donghae however, couldn't help but ignore everything coming from the worried man's mouth. Instead his thoughts focused in on the cold eyes that met his.
Donghae clutched his chest as Siwon sat across from him. "You finally remembered haven't you?" Donghae nodded. "Do you remember how callous you were towards him?" Donghae stiffened but nodded once again.
"I tried to say I was sorry." Donghae murmured as he held his hands together and placed them under his chin.
Siwon leaned his chin on his palm. "I doubt he'll ever forgive you, though I know you would never return the kid's feelings-."
"On the contrary," Donghae said slowly, the young man's eyes never leaving his thoughts. "I think I'm starting to like him."
Siwon widened his eyes and shook his head. "The irony... It seems what comes around, goes around in the most brutal fashion." Donghae mentally agreed. Henry who had once idolized him had grown up to be the serious and bitter guy who refused to acknowledge him, his innocent eyes replaced by those cold eyes.
Donghae had did as he promised and continued to at meet Henry at least once a day. Instead of for the mere purpose of an apology, he instead wanted to at least see the young man. And despite his cutting words and frequent glares, Donghae was relentless.
"When are you going to stop this game of yours?" Henry asked scornfully as he dropped his skates to the snow-covered ground.
"It isn't a game." Donghae replied easily.
"That's right, toying with emotions is beneath you." Henry said cynically.
"I've never once toyed with your emotions, I was ruthless with how I treated you but I never led you on."
Henry sneered. "You're right, you never encouraged some delusional kid's crush, and I agree that was my own fault. I was completely blinded on what kind of person you really were."
Donghae furrowed his eyebrows. "Then if you understand that, then why do you hate me so much?"
"Just because you didn't encourage them doesn't make you any less of a saint." He retorted. He tried to turn away when Donghae reached for his forearm again. "Let go of me-"
"You're not just mad at me for leaving you, you're mad at something else." Donghae interjected as Henry tried to pull his arm away. "What else did I do?"
Henry tried to shove him away when Donghae reached for his wrist. "Let me go!" Henry demanded.
"Not until you tell me." Donghae said, somehow maintaining his composure as Henry was losing his. Henry looked up and startled Donghae with his reddened eyes, no longer were they masked. Donghae knew he had seen a hint in their last confrontation, he was hiding his internal struggle, his own pain.
Henry looked away as Donghae maintained a firm grip on his wrist. "I thought that after all this time, I had gotten over it. I thought that once I saw you again, I wouldn't feel this way at all." He smiled bitterly. "I thought that pathetic excuse of puppy love would go away, and instead when I saw you I felt something so much stronger. That it made me both furious and afraid.
"Angry at myself that I could fall for a jerk a second time," He looked down, "And afraid that you'd leave me again." Henry closed his eyes as a single tear fell down his cheek. Donghae pulled his wrist against him and held him in a tight embrace.
"I'm sorry." Donghae said sincerely. "I was a horrible person back then and I'm that much of a horrible person today. But I regret what I did to you and I'm sorry."
"That isn't enough." Henry murmured against his jacket.
"I know." Donghae took a deep breath as he tightened his hold on him. "I know."
-
When the long awaited final day of their visit came to an end, Siwon was flabbergasted when Donghae suddenly grabbed the car keys from his hand and threw it towards the nearby forest.
"What was that for?!" Siwon asked, clutching his short hair. "That was our only set!"
Donghae shrugged. "Then we have no choice but to stay here then." He turned on his heel and ignored Siwon's yells, smiling triumphantly as he trudged once more through the snow.
He recognized the sounds of the skates skidding across the ice and leaned against a nearby tree, watching as Henry skated around.
Henry looked up and smiled. "What are you doing here?"
Donghae crossed his arms. "Weren't you supposed to see me off."
Henry looked away as he chuckled. "It was pay-back." Donghae nodded as he took a few steps forward.
"Fortunately for you I'm not leaving just yet." Donghae called out, Henry smirked as he skidded to a stop in front of him. The only barrier between them was the edge where the snow met the ice.
"How is that good for me? It means you'll be around that much longer."
"You'll have to suffer my constant presence, but think of that as also pay-back." Henry smiled in response.
"You hate wearing sweaters and overpriced heat." Henry pointed out.
"I'm not the only one paying for it." Donghae replied easily.
"You hate the cold."
"I'll learn to live with it."
Henry moved closer towards him, his skates halfway on the snow. "You were annoyed by me."
Donghae shrugged. "I still am annoyed by you, but I'm adjusting day by day." Henry shook his head as Donghae leaned his forehead against his. "You're still a brat."
Henry smirked. "You're right," He suddenly shoved Donghae back onto the snow. "I am."
Donghae lowered his eyes as he reached and harshly pulled Henry's arms. Henry's skates no longer touched the ice, he was now top of Donghae, his face buried in the snow. He wiped the snow from his face, he paused when Donghae patted the snow from his hair and gently from his shoulders.
Henry gulped slightly. "You nearly hated me then." Henry murmured.
Donghae took a deep breath as he held Henry loosely in his arms. "Feelings change." He looked up at the cloud covered sky. "And you? You worshiped and loved me back then, what about now?
Henry pretended to think about it as Donghae gave a slight pat on the head. "I may have changed drastically... but my feelings persisted against my better judgment."
"Meaning you still worship me?"
"Hardly." Henry chuckled, he leaned his head against his shoulder and clutched the tip of Donghae's jacket. "But I still love you."
Donghae smiled as he held Henry even closer against him. They continued to lie in the snow until they were scolded by a furious Siwon that they'd get sick.
Sure enough they both came down with fevers that night, Donghae smiled as he used another excuse for Henry to stay beside him. They stayed in separate but close beds on the floor.
Henry moved his hand but pulled back slightly, tempted to hold Donghae's hand. It was what Henry had often done when he forced himself to stay the night with an unwillingly but reluctant Donghae. Despite knowing their mutual feelings, Henry didn't want to come off as strong as he had, he didn't want to push him away again.
Henry smiled softly as he watched Donghae's sleeping expression, his features had matured since then, but even now it was still enough to cause his heart to beat faster. People are often afraid of how much and how drastic a person could change over time. But to Henry's relief and elation, he was happy for Donghae's change and his own heart's unwillingness to never truly give way.
He was surprised when Donghae suddenly reached for his hand and interlocked their fingers. He wanted to ask, when Donghae with his eyes still closed, simply said. "My hand is cold."
The past Henry would have jumped onto Donghae in excitement despite the other's exhaustion. The current Henry couldn't help but do the same.
Some things really don't change.
- ❄ Challenge 27 ❄ | ❄ Challenge 29 ❄ -
~ SuJu 31-shot Masterlist ~
Pairing: HenHae
Genre: AU!Romance, Drama
Theme: Skates, Phrase to include: "what comes around, goes around"
Summary: He returned unwillingly to the place he barely remembered, only knowing that he hated the overwhelming frigid weather. Yet he didn't realize the tears he had caused, the naive innocence he carelessly took away, whose heart he had unknowingly broken.
-
Donghae sighed as he looked out the window, the snow continually fell and despite its somewhat calming scene, it drove him insane.
"Why did we have to come here of all places? Its freezing." Donghae huddled further into his comforter, beneath he wore plenty of thermals, sweaters and an extra jacket.
"But we haven't been here in since we were kids." Siwon reasoned. "It's been ten years already since we've been to your uncle's winter home... Isn't it nostaglic?" He looked off in a daze, Donghae lowered his eyes.
"You may enjoy this, but I'm not. I just want to go home."
Siwon sighed as he laid against the wall. "You never liked the cold, even back then."
"Yes, something my parents tend to forget. Which, why did you even agree to go? My parents backing out was my only chance to stay home and then you just had to open your big mouth."
Siwon pursed his lips. "But I wanted to come back here... It sounded fun."
Donghae sighed heavily as he looked out the window, the snow didn't seem like it would ever stop falling as it continued to pile up on the ground. "What's so great about this place anyway?" He murmured.
The thought of staying in such a frigid place for three weeks annoyed him to no end. He had always turned down all offers from his uncle but now here he was, trapped in such place with no way back home.
Siwon was cooking in the kitchen when he heard Donghae sigh again. He didn't look up as he chopped up the food. "Uncle kept some photo albums on the table, why don't you look through them?"
"Not interested." Donghae replied, Siwon heard another sigh and he paused his knife.
"Just look through them, it'll help pass the time quicker." Donghae somehow doubted that but his own boredom was getting the best of him. He reached for the album and pulled it towards him, he flipped through the pages, barely registering anything when he stopped in one page.
It was a faded picture of two figures standing on the frozen lake, he tilted his head, trying to remember why it seemed so familiar. After a few more minutes he huffed in frustration. "Siwon! Come over here." Siwon quickly washed his hands and walked over. Siwon peered over his shoulder at the picture and clapped in realization.
"That's you and Henry." Donghae furrowed his eyebrows.
"Henry?" He asked, Siwon nodded.
"Remember those neighbors nearby? They had a son that used to play with us, nearly every day he went to see us. I remember that in this picture, you were ice skating together..." He slapped Donghae's shoulders. "How can you not remember him?"
Donghae simply shrugged. "I think I hated the cold enough that I repressed most of it." He squinted his eyes at the picture. "That and its not exactly high quality... it'd be easier if I could actually see this kid's face."
"Your memory hasn't always been the best, even now that we're in college has it made you miss your classes." Siwon returned to kitchen when Donghae smiled at his statement, he couldn't believe Siwon had actually believed that excuse but decided not to correct him.
-
After five days cooped up in the house, he decided that despite the cold, he at least needed to get out. He was lucky that it was just slightly warmer and he had recently stolen Siwon's insulated jackets. He trudged through the snow when he took a haphazard step and fell completely into three feet of snow. He cursed under his breath as he lifted up his face and wiped the snow away from it. He sighed to himself, this may have been a bad idea.
He lifted himself by his arms when he noted a short distance away a lake that was completely frozen. There he recognized the back of someone sitting down on the edge of it, Donghae rose himself up completely and patted the snow away. He decided to walk closer and was only a few steps away from the young man. Donghae recognized that he was putting on ice skates.
"Is it even safe to do that?" Donghae asked.
"It's safer than talking to random strangers." The young man replied, Donghae shrugged it off.
"You have a point I guess." The young man finished tying them and pushed himself up. He steadied himself as he skated skillfully across the ice, Donghae watched him go on.
"You don't seem to care for the snow." The young man called out a short while later.
Donghae scoffed. "This type of place is horrible."
"This type of place is beautiful, you're the one who's horrible."
Donghae arched an eyebrow. "Aren't we rude? You really should be polite to people you just met."
The young man gave a bitter smile as he paused momentarily on the ice. "Just met." He muttered. "Forgetting someone is also quite rude."
Donghae gave a perplexed look. "Do I know you?"
The young man gave a slight shrug. "It's not important." He slid quickly to the snow and began to take off his skates.
Donghae remained quiet as he watched the man roughly take off his skates and put on his shoes and stormed off. He heard Siwon call out his name and turned to face his panting expression.
"Finally, you could have at least told me you were going outside. I was worried." He smiled and gestured behind him. "How was it seeing Henry again?" Donghae blinked when he recalled Siwon's earlier explanation and furrowed his eyebrows as he also relived their conversation.
"Did Henry hate me?" Donghae asked, they had returned to the house when Siwon looked up as he folded the laundry.
"Hate you?" Siwon arched both eyebrows. "He never hated you, on the contrary he... well, don't you remember?"
Donghae raised an eyebrow when Siwon said incredulously. "I can't believe you forgot."
"I can't help it, now help refresh my memory."
Siwon sighed. "He always tagged around us, but he always liked to do so more with you. It was obvious that he felt something for you."
Donghae widened his eyes. "He liked me?"
Siwon scoffed. "He would always hug you, grab your hand, call you and even-How can you not remember?! This kid practically adored and admired you and you just-you...I can't even talk to you right now." Siwon folded the last bit of laundry and took the piles with him.
-
To try to trigger his memories, Donghae went through the various photo albums, searching for pictures of that particular winter. He was growing frustrated, how could there be so little proof?
He was about to give up when he found an album that looked worn out, he opened it and took a deep breath, he found it. The first three pics were of him and Henry, and it continued like that throughout the pages. There'd occasionally be pictures of Siwon but nearly every picture was just the two of them.
Yet Donghae noticed something, aside from the smiling Henry in all the pictures, in contrast was a stolid Donghae. There wasn't a single picture where he smiled or even laughed, somehow it was that realization alone that made him remember that winter.
The memories flooded through him as he recalled his bitter outlook, one that mimicked those of most rebellious teenagers. He had wanted nothing to do with the young kid, Henry was a nuisance that he couldn't shake off. Henry always had to see him, always had to call him, always just had to be there despite Donghae's protests. This kid who ignored all of his insults and would always greet him with that smile, it had annoyed him completely. He was heartless to say the least.
That's when he remembered his last day he had ever been here, he was rushing to put away his things in the car. Already in the backseat waiting to leave from the retched place when Siwon rushed by and asked where Uncle was so that they could wait a bit longer. Donghae asked him why.
"Henry called, he wants to say goodbye to you." Donghae huffed.
"Let's just go."
"But Henry-"
"Let's go, I'm done with this place." Donghae stated, he had made Siwon not mention a word to Uncle and soon enough the car drove off. Without mention of it he soon enough forgot that winter, drowning himself in what he thought was important. Enjoying the high school life and involving himself in the worst of things, thinking that maybe no one truly care, that everyone only saw the worst in him. Not remembering that there was a person back at this place who saw him as someone valuable, the type of person Donghae honestly thought he never was.
Donghae sighed as he closed the photo album and looked back at the window. The memory of that faded picture also resurfaced, Henry had dragged him to the frozen lake, excited that it was now hard enough to skate over. Donghae soon found himself on the ice with loaned skates, he knew how but Henry struggled to stay leveled. Henry kept trying when he nearly fell onto the ground, Donghae out of reflex held his arms when he saw that flash. Siwon had taken the picture without his knowledge.
He felt guilt crept in but tried to brush it aside to no avail.
-
Henry's address had remained the same as he walked over there. He was about to knock when the door opened, Henry was startled to find him there.
"What do you want?" He asked.
Donghae ignored his rude tone, he reminded himself that he deserved it. "I... I wanted to apologize for what I did back then Henry."
Henry scoffed. "You actually remember me now? How thoughtful of you." He closed the door behind him and walked past Donghae.
"I know, I was a horrible person-"
"Still are." Henry corrected, Donghae took a deep breath.
"I am a horrible person, that's why I'm here to apologize-"
"I don't need it." Henry stated, not daring to turn around or even meet his eyes. "I've long chosen to get over that and just because you decide to feel guilty after ten years, doesn't mean I'll give you the satisfaction of being forgiven just to feel better about yourself."
Henry tried to walk off again when Donghae grabbed his forearm. "I know, I don't expect any forgiveness from you but at least let me properly apologize to you. Its the least I could do, and even if you walk out on me again I'll just keep following you until you hear it all."
Henry forced a laugh. "Funny how life works," He turned his head and met Donghae's eyes. "I was always the one chasing after you, but now I see that the tables have turned." He forced his arm away and walked away from Donghae who remained frozen where he was.
When Donghae had finally managed to move and get himself back to the house, Siwon barged him with questions with where he's been and what he had been doing. Donghae however, couldn't help but ignore everything coming from the worried man's mouth. Instead his thoughts focused in on the cold eyes that met his.
Donghae clutched his chest as Siwon sat across from him. "You finally remembered haven't you?" Donghae nodded. "Do you remember how callous you were towards him?" Donghae stiffened but nodded once again.
"I tried to say I was sorry." Donghae murmured as he held his hands together and placed them under his chin.
Siwon leaned his chin on his palm. "I doubt he'll ever forgive you, though I know you would never return the kid's feelings-."
"On the contrary," Donghae said slowly, the young man's eyes never leaving his thoughts. "I think I'm starting to like him."
Siwon widened his eyes and shook his head. "The irony... It seems what comes around, goes around in the most brutal fashion." Donghae mentally agreed. Henry who had once idolized him had grown up to be the serious and bitter guy who refused to acknowledge him, his innocent eyes replaced by those cold eyes.
Donghae had did as he promised and continued to at meet Henry at least once a day. Instead of for the mere purpose of an apology, he instead wanted to at least see the young man. And despite his cutting words and frequent glares, Donghae was relentless.
"When are you going to stop this game of yours?" Henry asked scornfully as he dropped his skates to the snow-covered ground.
"It isn't a game." Donghae replied easily.
"That's right, toying with emotions is beneath you." Henry said cynically.
"I've never once toyed with your emotions, I was ruthless with how I treated you but I never led you on."
Henry sneered. "You're right, you never encouraged some delusional kid's crush, and I agree that was my own fault. I was completely blinded on what kind of person you really were."
Donghae furrowed his eyebrows. "Then if you understand that, then why do you hate me so much?"
"Just because you didn't encourage them doesn't make you any less of a saint." He retorted. He tried to turn away when Donghae reached for his forearm again. "Let go of me-"
"You're not just mad at me for leaving you, you're mad at something else." Donghae interjected as Henry tried to pull his arm away. "What else did I do?"
Henry tried to shove him away when Donghae reached for his wrist. "Let me go!" Henry demanded.
"Not until you tell me." Donghae said, somehow maintaining his composure as Henry was losing his. Henry looked up and startled Donghae with his reddened eyes, no longer were they masked. Donghae knew he had seen a hint in their last confrontation, he was hiding his internal struggle, his own pain.
Henry looked away as Donghae maintained a firm grip on his wrist. "I thought that after all this time, I had gotten over it. I thought that once I saw you again, I wouldn't feel this way at all." He smiled bitterly. "I thought that pathetic excuse of puppy love would go away, and instead when I saw you I felt something so much stronger. That it made me both furious and afraid.
"Angry at myself that I could fall for a jerk a second time," He looked down, "And afraid that you'd leave me again." Henry closed his eyes as a single tear fell down his cheek. Donghae pulled his wrist against him and held him in a tight embrace.
"I'm sorry." Donghae said sincerely. "I was a horrible person back then and I'm that much of a horrible person today. But I regret what I did to you and I'm sorry."
"That isn't enough." Henry murmured against his jacket.
"I know." Donghae took a deep breath as he tightened his hold on him. "I know."
-
When the long awaited final day of their visit came to an end, Siwon was flabbergasted when Donghae suddenly grabbed the car keys from his hand and threw it towards the nearby forest.
"What was that for?!" Siwon asked, clutching his short hair. "That was our only set!"
Donghae shrugged. "Then we have no choice but to stay here then." He turned on his heel and ignored Siwon's yells, smiling triumphantly as he trudged once more through the snow.
He recognized the sounds of the skates skidding across the ice and leaned against a nearby tree, watching as Henry skated around.
Henry looked up and smiled. "What are you doing here?"
Donghae crossed his arms. "Weren't you supposed to see me off."
Henry looked away as he chuckled. "It was pay-back." Donghae nodded as he took a few steps forward.
"Fortunately for you I'm not leaving just yet." Donghae called out, Henry smirked as he skidded to a stop in front of him. The only barrier between them was the edge where the snow met the ice.
"How is that good for me? It means you'll be around that much longer."
"You'll have to suffer my constant presence, but think of that as also pay-back." Henry smiled in response.
"You hate wearing sweaters and overpriced heat." Henry pointed out.
"I'm not the only one paying for it." Donghae replied easily.
"You hate the cold."
"I'll learn to live with it."
Henry moved closer towards him, his skates halfway on the snow. "You were annoyed by me."
Donghae shrugged. "I still am annoyed by you, but I'm adjusting day by day." Henry shook his head as Donghae leaned his forehead against his. "You're still a brat."
Henry smirked. "You're right," He suddenly shoved Donghae back onto the snow. "I am."
Donghae lowered his eyes as he reached and harshly pulled Henry's arms. Henry's skates no longer touched the ice, he was now top of Donghae, his face buried in the snow. He wiped the snow from his face, he paused when Donghae patted the snow from his hair and gently from his shoulders.
Henry gulped slightly. "You nearly hated me then." Henry murmured.
Donghae took a deep breath as he held Henry loosely in his arms. "Feelings change." He looked up at the cloud covered sky. "And you? You worshiped and loved me back then, what about now?
Henry pretended to think about it as Donghae gave a slight pat on the head. "I may have changed drastically... but my feelings persisted against my better judgment."
"Meaning you still worship me?"
"Hardly." Henry chuckled, he leaned his head against his shoulder and clutched the tip of Donghae's jacket. "But I still love you."
Donghae smiled as he held Henry even closer against him. They continued to lie in the snow until they were scolded by a furious Siwon that they'd get sick.
Sure enough they both came down with fevers that night, Donghae smiled as he used another excuse for Henry to stay beside him. They stayed in separate but close beds on the floor.
Henry moved his hand but pulled back slightly, tempted to hold Donghae's hand. It was what Henry had often done when he forced himself to stay the night with an unwillingly but reluctant Donghae. Despite knowing their mutual feelings, Henry didn't want to come off as strong as he had, he didn't want to push him away again.
Henry smiled softly as he watched Donghae's sleeping expression, his features had matured since then, but even now it was still enough to cause his heart to beat faster. People are often afraid of how much and how drastic a person could change over time. But to Henry's relief and elation, he was happy for Donghae's change and his own heart's unwillingness to never truly give way.
He was surprised when Donghae suddenly reached for his hand and interlocked their fingers. He wanted to ask, when Donghae with his eyes still closed, simply said. "My hand is cold."
The past Henry would have jumped onto Donghae in excitement despite the other's exhaustion. The current Henry couldn't help but do the same.
Some things really don't change.
- ❄ Challenge 27 ❄ | ❄ Challenge 29 ❄ -
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